Another one
(Cueup: "My Way" by Butch Walker)
(Fade in to a clip of Copycat's return at Scars and Stripes Forever. As he walks to the ring, he pauses briefly to take off his beret and hand it to a kid sitting in the front row. As he does, the clip freezes. The entire image fades to black, except for the beret. The beret then begins rotating and growing larger until it almost fills the screen. The rotation stops with the "THE CAT" lettering on the top-front portion facing the screen. The camera then pans back, revealing that the beret image is on an enormous screen. As the camera finishes panning, we see Copycat sitting in a director's chair in front of it, facing the camera. He wears an identical beret, jeans, and an FWF "Cat Pack: Road to Victory" T-shirt, with duct tape tactfully obscuring the league's logo. He takes off his beret for a moment, inspects it, and then puts it back on his head. He looks up at the camera and speaks)
Copycat: So...World's Finest Wrestling.
(He chuckles)
Copycat: Every time I cut my first interview in a league, that's what I say. "So...insert league name here." I don't really know why. I guess with all the league-hopping I've been forced to do lately, I got into a bit of a routine. I took a little break from the business because of all that forced league-hopping...but one clichè isn't going to hurt much, is it?
(He shrugs)
Copycat: So it looks like, for once, my talent is being recognized right away in a league instead of my having to earn it. I think I've paid my dues more than enough, and it's about time that started paying off. My first match, I'm in a little mini-tournament for a shot at the North American Title. Now I admit, it's not exactly a momentous honor, but it does mean that I can have a title in just three matches. I can't complain. Took me four the last time.
(Copycat turns to look at the screen behind him, then turns back to the camera)
Copycat: So, once again, here's the question...just WHAT am I doing in this setting? It isn't complicated, but I think I'll complicate it a little, just because I enjoy doing that. First off, since my opponent has yet to show his face, I really don't know anything about the guy except his name. So I really have to apologize for the fact that I'm going to make fun of his name, because ordinarily I am against that sort of behavior...it's overused, and often, it's pointless. With the best wrestlers, the name is often academic. Look at guys like Psycho and Doc Silver. Sure, the names are stupid, but those two can stand alone without the names - it's nothing more than something to recognize them by. But when you don't know anything about a guy except for his name...well, you just don't have anything else to go on. So I'm sorry, folks, but it's time to mock Ebony Jade's name.
(He clears his throat)
Copycat: Ebony Jade. Y'know, since I don't know the guy, I tried looking him up on the Internet, and you know what I got? PORN. Porn by the proverbial truckload. "Ebony" and "Jade" have got to be two of the most popular names in porn. I suppose one or two of those sites could have related to my opponent. But when they're in a midst of porn sites...I'm sorry, but I am NOT clicking on that sh(BLEEP)t. What can I say? I hate pop-up ads. People have mocked my ring name before, but I'd much rather be likened to a thriller-slash-crime-drama movie than a "first time anal" flick. Call it a personal preference.
(Copycat smiles inspirationally and flashes a thumbs-up)
Copycat: And SPEAKING of the Internet...I could sit here and describe just what I've been doing for the seven months that I've been MIA from the wrestling business...but I think I covered that pretty well at Scars and Stripes Forever, so watch the tape. Or go on the Internet and look it up. No porn results for THIS ring name.
(He grins - enter trademark Copycat grin!)
Copycat: So I suppose the only question left to ask is...just what do I have in store? What can WFW expect from the Cat? A lot of people are familiar with me, so what everyone wants to know is...what's going to be different? I've been gone for seven months, so surely some things have changed, right? Well...I can't deny that's the truth. So for those of you who are thinking, "Just what is Copycat's biggest change going to be?" I invite you to gaze upon it.
(Copycat, still looking at the camera, points both thumbs at the screen behind him)
Copycat: There you have it. My biggest change is definitely the beret. Quite frankly, I don't feel the need to change myself right now - I had a pretty damn good thing going, and I'm not about to change the best thing I've had going in my career just because I was gone for a little while. That wouldn't reinforce my status as the Smartest Player in the Game, now would it? So you don't have to expect too much different from me - I'm still going to get into everyone's head and I'm still going to be un-freakin'-STOPPABLE. And that, my curious friends, it just all there is to it.
(Fade out)
