Toledo, OH House Show 00

[SteveA]

We meet again

(the screen comes in on the GLCW backdrop, where Jean Rabesque, as he wears his NEW GLCW T-Shirt, “I Got Your Hype Right Here,” which is available at merchandising stands everywhere, that is, as long as they’re not sold out, but in the mean time Rabesque stands, as he removes his sunglasses, and speaks)

RABESQUE: Well, here we go Sean, what is this one on one, take ten for you? The first nine times haven’t been good enough for you? Having your ass beaten every time before hasn’t squelched that thirst? You know, in some ways I have to admire you Sean. The perseverance, the intestinal fortitude to keep fighting back and fighting back, time after time after time. But then on the other hand, I stop and realize how absolutely pathetic you are. I see you right now and I consume your being. I am everything to you. And as much as you will deny it, you want to beat me more than anything in wrestling right now. And to me, you’re just the next opponent on the docket. Are you a challenge? Sure, but you really a serious threat? Hardly. But don’t think for one second that I’m not taking it seriously Sean, because I know the sun will occasionally shine on a dog’s ass if you give it the opportunity, which is why I’m not going to give you the chance.

You amuse me Sean. You see a few weeks ago, we met in a little tag team match, and for days upon days upon days all I got to hear about was how Sean Edmunds was finally getting another chance to beat Jean Rabesque. You lectured about it, you preached, and you did everything but promise that you would beat me in that tag team match. And then what happened Sean? What happened after that? You hung your tag team partner out to dry! You got fed up, and you realized you couldn’t win the match. So instead of sticking back to take the loss like a man, you ran away and left Savage to take it by himself. Yeah, really freaking honorable Sean. You sure do have a hell of a lot to be proud of.

(Rabesque stops and pauses for a moment, then continues)

And hell, what’s not to be proud of? I mean, it’s not like your biggest career win was in a tag team match at a house show in the middle of nowhere, right? Oh, you claim that it’s not? Then why the last time we met was that all I heard about? You pinned me, finally, after all these years. You won at some forgotten house show, that was supposed to reverse the years of Pay-per-view and television beatings that I gave you. Like that’s somehow going to change the fact that you’re 0 for the last two centuries against me. It didn’t change anything Sean, you just got lucky one night, one night out of a hundred. And how do I know that? How can I be so confident? You proved it to me last time Sean.

So now, taped fists. Different stipulation, same situation. I have a pretty good idea where it came from. Hell, Sean, I wouldn’t have been surprised if you were beating down Malec’s door, trying to get any stipulation added that was possible to make this something other than a pure wrestling match. Why? Because like I said, YOU CAN’T BEAT ME! I don’t care about the stips. Taped fists or not Sean, you’re still the same piece of crap you’ve always been. That’s how it goes, and that’s how it will always be. No false gimmicks, no false hype, I am Jean Rabesque.

(fade out)

 

[Manson]

The Human Game of Chess

((FADEIN: A segmented area of the locker room where Michael Manson sits at a table wearing his "Praise Manson and Pass the Pez" t-shirt and jeans with the GLCW title hanging from a clothing hook. Across from is TEMPEST, sitting on a crate as they play chess.))

MANSON(surveying his move): Of course, I've told you, Golem, I believe everything I say. You claim I've done some very interesting things in the past and I have, I could write my own Bible. As for now, the evidence of my actions is a belt. Now let's ask, Golem, what have you done in the GLCW? ..........Other than nothing? Where is the rpoof of your vaulted superiority because I have the proof of mine. Maelstrom and you seem to having a contest to show us all who the greatest and grandest is. But really, if either of you were a real man, you'd admit to being afraid of me. No one ever does because ego always comes first. I'm more than willing to wrestle the match by myself, after all Blazer wouldn't have done much more than hold my pez while I burned the both of you anyway.

((Manson moves a knight into position.))

Check.

((Tempest looks at the board and smiles.))

TEMPEST: Yer think yer goin ta get away wit this masquerade? ((He takes a out a cigar and lights it in a manly and brutal way.)) I see right thru you Manson. I was raised on da island and I killed 6 deer with my bare hands I tell you. By the way, hand me that jar.

((Manson picks up a jar from the floor near the table leg and slaps Tempest's hand away as he tries to steal Manson's queen.))

Give it here boy. I'll show you what a man is.

((Tempest takes a handful of the creme and puts his hand down the back of his pants.))

MANSON: What the bloody hell are you doing?

TEMPEST: You ever ben' to da zoo pardner?

MANSON: I've been known to taunt the occasional polar bear.

TEMPEST: Well you seen them chimps, monkeys, an' baboons with their asses missin the skin and hair. They always sittin on the cold, harsh ground, son. It's the same way back on the island. Here, I can cool it off. ((He takes a manly drag on his cigar.)) There mate.

((Tempest moves his king out of position. Manson takes him with his rook.))

MANSON: Checkmate.

((Tempest picks up the board and throws all the pieces to the floor. He takes the board and starts cracking it against the table.))

TEMPEST: I didn't care 'bout winnin' or losin'. I just wanted the baddest chessplayers around to come on by. It takes a real man to do this.

((Tempest takes a bite out of the chess board and starts gnawing down on it.))

TEMPEST(between bites): This is what ya hav to do wit the belt, Manson. Then you'll be a man.

MANSON: You want to play Magic?

((Tempest drops the board to the side and pulls out the "Golem" card with Golem's picture pasted on the front with all the attributes highlighted to the top levels with a marker.))

TEMPEST: Beat that Pardner. Beat that.

((Manson takes out a card with a pciture of King Krusher counting Manson's pin on Golem to win the GLCW title.))

TEMPEST: Darn blasted.

((Tempest takes the Golem card and eats it and then he jumps onto the table, grimacing and flexing.))

Whaca goin' do, Manson? Whaca goin do?

((Manson picks him up and carries him over to the clothing hooks and hangs him by the seat of his pants.))

TEMPEST: Yer think yer a man now? Yer think yer goin' git away wit this? I can still break alla yer bones from here.

((Manson puts the Masked Blazer mask on Tempest backwards and there is nothing but muffles and groans. Manson takes the remains of Tempest's cigar and starts biting into it. He looks over to tempest, who gives him the thumbs up.))

FTB

 

[TheOriginalSE]

One step closer...

((FADEIN: Sean Edmunds is sitting down in a chair somewhere in a lockerroom. He's in his regular clothes with his ring attire somewhere in the pile behind him. He sits with his elbows on his thighs and his hands folded. He cracks his knuckles before finally looking up at the camera.))

EDMUNDS: "Somehow I knew that you'd immediately go back to saying how this would be my three hundredth chance at finally taking you down. It just popped into my head the moment that I saw I was to face you on this upcoming house card. But what you have given is an excess of complete idiocy. You know that my thirst has not been quenched and could not be quenched even if I came out completely and undeniably victorious at this upcoming house show. The fact is, I don't need to beat you on a meaningless houseshow. You said it yourself that its not my biggest match. It just helps get me one step closer, Jean. You see me as pathetic. (smiles) That's fine, Jean. Because I see you as weak. You've spent so long in the years since we've last met one on one becoming complacent, that our upcoming match on this house card seems insignificant. You see, Jean, after this house show, no matter what the outcome, our battle will not be over. I don't need to show a few hundred fans just how feeble you've become. I plan on showing thousands upon thousands live in action, and live across the televisions of those who watch at home. You're still begging for a primetime humiliation, Jean. This house show, well, I suppose it'll just be a preliminary bout."

((Edmunds just shakes his head as now sits up straight.))

EDMUNDS: "You are everything to me right now, Jean. You're the last thing on my mind before I go to bed, and the first thing on my mind when I wake up in the morning. I can't help it. I'm consumed with my distaste for you. And I'm tortured every (BLEEP)ing day knowing that the only victories I have over you are not even one on one. Which leads me to the next thing. The lack of support I gave my partner during the tag match we were involved in. Did you really expect me to support someone who gives as half-assed performances as Jon Skieler? C'mon, Jean. Even you knew that Skieler would not last 20 minutes as my partner. I don't have the patience for those who will not commit themselves fully to my cause. And I'm sure he still can hear the ringing in his ears after that chair hit his skull. I got to fulfill my need for a fix of you, Jean. That's all I needed. ANd now, well, now I'll get you one on one. But its a bit jaded this time, isn't it? A taped fist match. I can rest assure you, Jean, that I did not request this type of match. I prefer to be able to outshine, outprove and outwrestle you the old fashioned way. So someone up front must have thought that two seasoned wrestlers would offer much more entertainment in a taped fist match. Well, they'll get to see just how entertaining it will be."

((Edmunds stands up and cracks his knuckles again.))

EDMUNDS: "I'm a showman, Jean. I love the theatrics of the deal. And I know you hate the theatrics. We're two different types of people, Jean. You said it, taped fists or not, I'm still the same piece of crap that I've always been. But the fact of the matter is that come this upcoming house show, and even later down the line, you're going to realize that this piece of crap... (nods) this piece of crap is ten times the wrestler you are, you've been and you could ever hope of becoming."

((FADEOUT: As Edmunds turns and walks away.))

 

[JLebron]

It's all good.....

[updated:LAST EDITED ON Nov-26-02 AT 06:50 PM (EST)](FADE IN..... a dark obscure screen where we make out a pair of eyes glaring at us in the dark. He laughs faintly and as the screen slowly fades he whispers .......)

[font size=3][font face=verdana]"..... it's all good ....."[/font][/font]​

[/center]

(FADE BACK IN...... to a black screen where numbers appear and a count-down commences..... 4..... 3.... 2.... 1! Suddenly, a booming voice starts announcing....)

V/O: "THE FOLLOWING IS A PAID MIC SPOT FOR MAELSTROM! THE VIEWS EXPRESSED HERE TONIGHT ARE SOLELY THOSE OF MAELSTROM AND DO NOT NECESSARILY REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE MATTEL CORPORATION, THE M&M CANDY CORPORATION, THE GLCW OR ITS AFFILIATES"

(CUTTO.... an empty stage as the Bugs Bunny "Looney Tunes" theme plays in the background..... the curtains part and a spotlight shines on a small stage where we see a Maelstrom action figure as he sits on a plastic tricycle. To his left, is an M&M candy figure with its trademark M&M insignia on its chest. It sits on a small plastic, throne-like chair and on the soles of his plastic white feet are written two words. On one foot the word Michael and on the other Manson. On the top of his oversized head is a tiny plastic gold belt. And next to the M&M candy figure is an empty tiny plastic stool with a small mask with the initials M.B. on it. As the "Looney Tunes" theme begins to fade out we begin to hear the excited voices of the "journalistic" audience.....cameras pan back and we see an audience of Weebles dressed as reporters. The cameras pan back a little more as the Weebles begin firing questions....)

WEEBLE #1: MAELSTROM!! MAELSTROM!! You seem to be taking a very calm approach to this match up against your opponents Manson and Blazer. Blazer is just a plain loose canon and Michael Manson is a wrestler who has done it all. A wrestler who claims superiority based on HIS history yet dismisses everyone elses history. A wrestler who is so full of himself that he carries a constipated look on his face. Do you think he's all talk?

(Camera zooms in on the Maelstrom action figure as the unmistakable voice of Maelstrom is heard....)

MAELSTROM ACTION FIGURE V/O: Blazer is too busy findin' yet another rock to crawl and hide under so I won't even bother commentin' on him for now. So that leaves the self-proclaimed messiah and savior of wrestling, that Charles Manson wannabee! Do I think he's all talk? Hell, let's hope not. I mean, I caught some of his "act" from prior promos and it'd be a real let down if the only talent he REALLY possessed came from the blatherings he MANURE-factures.

WEEBLE #2: Mr. M&M.... errr, excuse me, I mean Mr. Manson, how do you feel about going up against someone you yourself have never battled before.... someone who is regarded by some as one of the most feared wrestlers in the wrestling industry, some even view him as a legend? How does it feel to finally have the opportunity to go up againt Maelstrom?

(at that moment, an obvious taped and dubbed voice, which is strikingly similar to Elmer Fudd's voice responds for the M&M-Manson candy figure.....)

M&M-MANSON V/O: "hehheeheheheh..... I am da GEE-EL-SEE-DUBBYA gweatest wessler, day are not weespectable widdout me and I weel make ya SCWWEEEM Maelstwum!! Oh yeah, an' I'm da gweatest wessler in da werld cuz evweebody fears me!

(a recording of obvious manufactured laughter is heard as all the Weeble reporters begin to laugh.....)

WEEBLE #3: Maelstrom, Michael Manson doesn't seem to be lacking for confidence. He's already stated in an earlier interview that nobody has accomplished what he has and that everyone fears him. Do you really believe he can back up all this bravado?

MAELSTROM ACTION FIGURE V/O: What Manson CLAIMS and what he HOPES will happen are two totally different things. I've been there... done that, and will probably do it again. And I've seen guys like Manson come and go. And what I've noticed 'bout guys like Manson, is that their need for "self-strokin'" usually stems from a MUCH stronger deep rooted desire.

WEEBLE #3: What would that be?

MAELSTROM ACTION FIGURE V/O: FEAR! INSECURITY! Usually brought on by feelings of inadequacy....they continually harp on their accolades, beatin' on their chest, boastin' bravado in an effort to make up for what they lack. In short, they CAN'T and DON'T "measure-up", and hopefully in yer case Manson, a circumcision didn't cut shorter yer obvious deficencies, know what I mean?

(manufactured laughter is once again heard as the Weeble reporters laugh it up....)

WEEBLE #6: Care to rebutt Maelstrom's comments Blazer?

(The cameras zoom in on the empty stool where the Masked Blazer's mask lies. It stays focused there momentarily waiting for a response that never quite comes. After a few moments of silence, Weeble #6 moves on with his next question)

WEEBLE #6: Well, looks like Blazer wants to walk softly and carry a big stick I suppose. Maelstrom, what are your feelings regarding Blazer's silence and Manson's cocky attitude about the GLCW and it's wrestlers?

MAELSTROM ACTION FIGURE V/O: Considerin' how many times I've humiliated Blazer an' made him eat his hollow threats, It's actually pretty understandable why he chooses the sanctity of silence. As for Manson, I think he's actin' quite typical considerin'.... the term pizzle immediately comes to mind. He distorts facts an' conveniently sidesteps the truth whenever he's caught frontin'. He accuses Golem of makin' excuses for not takin' the strap from him, yet he's the first one to start rationalizin' whenever things don't go his way or his claims are shown for what they really are.... unsubstantiated ramblings of a man desperately in need of recognition and acceptance! Hell, rumor even has it that the GLCW ratings actually dropped a few points last week as a result of his repetitive endless dribble. Every time the viewers tuned in during one of his mic spots, they thought they were watchin re-runs so they changed the channel!

WEEBLE #4: And you think this farce you're pulling off here tonight will raise the ratings?

MAELSTROM ACTION FIGURE V/O: Who knows, an' more importantly who cares! It's become pretty obvious that he's livin' in a fantasy world, no doubt brought on by his insecurities..... so I'll humor him.... FOR NOW. When we meet, his fantasy will have to deal with my reality!

(at that point the M&M-Manson figure interjects in his Elmer Fudd voice.....)

M&M-MANSON V/O: hehheeheheheh..... I weel make ya SCWWEEEM like a wittle B(bleep)tch, Maelstwum!! Oh yeah, an' also dat da GEE-EL-SEE-DUBBYA is not wespectable without me cuz I'm da gweatest wessler of da werld an' evweebody fears me!

WEEBLE #4: Masked Blazer, you've been strangely silent throughout this entire interview. In fact, you've been strangely silent since this match was sanctioned. Care to comment or defend your partners views?

(Camera zooms in once again on the plastic stool with the mask laying on it. For moments we hear nothing but dead silence. It remains like this for a while until another Weeble gets tired of waiting for a response and moves on with a question of his own.)

WEEBLE #6: Well just as well as it looks as if we're going to have to wrap it up anyhow. That being the case, do any of you guys have any last comments you want to make?

(cameras zoom in on the M&M-MANSON figure......)

M&M-MANSON V/O: hehheeheheheh..... da GEE-EL-SEE-DUBBYA is not wespectable without me cuz I am da gweatest wessler in da werld an' evweebody fears me!

(the cameras then zoom in on the empty stool where the Masked Blazer's mask sits.....)

MASKED BLAZER MASK VO:....... (silence so extreme that the mics begin to flare up with loud feedback. The cameras then shift over to the Maelstrom action figure as it sits on the plastic tricycle)

MAELSTROM ACTION FIGURE V/O: Fun is fun Manson, ya had yers with yer blathers so far, spewing yer rhetoric..... and I just had a bit myself.... it's all good though cuz when we meet at the Toledo Sports Arena, its ALL gonna be ..... STRICTLY BUSINESS!

(the Bugs Bunny "Looney Tunes" theme starts back up as the cameras begin to fade out on the Maelstrom and M&M-Manson action figures as well as the stool with the Masked Blazer's mask on it. The cameras start pulling back then begin to focus as the tiny gold plastic belt slides off of the M&M-Manson figure's head and falls to the ground in front of the Maelstrom action figure. The cameras zoom in a bit on this then begins to fade-out. Before the fade-out can continue however, it's interrupted by the following message.....)

"ALL OF THE ACTORS WERE CONSENTING ADULT ACTION FIGURES AND NONE OF THEM HAD A SHELF LIFE LESS THAN 18 MONTHS. ALL PROCEEDS FROM THIS FILM WILL GO TO THE MICHAEL MANSON FOUNDATION, FOUNDED BY MAELSTROM, BECAUSE A MIND IS A TERRIBLE THING TO WASTE.....EVEN A DELUSIONAL ONE"

(The Porky Pig figure suddenly appears in the middle of the screen and does his trademark, stuttering "....that's all folks"... FADE OUT...)​

 

[QFCWarren]

RE: ashes to ashes... dust to dust.

Warren A. Nickolson:Well well this guy sure sounds confident does he?
The Emerald Warrior: Yes he does.
Turns to front to face the camera with glaring eyes looking menacing!
The Emerald Warrior:Mr. Ash this is not the wizard of oz here but The Emerald Warrior who proudly calls Seattle his home. Also I wasn't impressed with your wizard of oz comment although it was a nice movie.
Well we are going to do another movie called The Emerald Warrior turns Mr. Ash into ASHES or you will wish to be when I'm done with you!
Warren A. Nickolson:You are such an idiot to think that you would be a match for my protege. I DONT THINK SO! I think you should be reading The Wizard of Oz because I think the witch and the monkey men are calling out for you to hunt down Dorothy and get the red slippers back.
The Emerald Warrior:Sorry for my manager's sense of humor but I get it anyway. But look at yourself you are sick dude. I don't think you have a chance against the Torture Rack or a double neckbreaker!
Warren A. Nickolson:I think we should go on to other things such as watching Mr. Savage destroyed another so called victim.
The Emerald Warrior:Mr. Savage we havent forgotten you at all. You was very lucky to beat me. Next time I'll destroy you.
Then the camera fades out.

 

[zeroxxzero]

RE: ashes to ashes... dust to dust.

(fade in: same library as seen in prior interviews. Ash stands with his back to the camera scanning the spines of all the books in the section labeled "Ac to Ad", he picks out a book and begins to flip through it. After skimming only a few pages he closes it furiously and slams it back into the case and swiftly turns to face the camera.)

..ah, after a long wait I finally get a reply. Why is it you took so long? Coy are you? Scared? Do you need a heart Mr. Tin Man? See Mr. Wizard, or Mr. Oz... Baulm.. whatever name you prefer to go by in these anti-climactic times. It's not confidence that I "ooze" if you will, it's quite the opposite. Ash, that's me in case you did not see it in the handout you should have gotten on the first day of class, I am quite paranoid about most matches only because the thought of losing has never streamed into by concious or subconcious.. but.. end of that.

I see you're from the great city of Seattle.. I believe Boeing Aircrafts is headquarted there... among other companies such as Starbucks, in which you and your family probably work odd jobs selling muffins and cleaning up spilt espresso. Sadly, I hope you keep that job because you're career in Hollywood would be as short as Ed Wood's heh ::chuckles::..that I say was a good one. For you speak almost as bad as Keanu Reaves... and quite possibly after challenging me will look like Christopher.

::Ash takes a deep breath only to hold it for a second and then exhale::

as for your manager... or sidekick, or personal trainer, or masuse.. what have you, he has no time to remark about my abilities or what I should do in my leisure time. The only one who may be prancing around in red slippers.. is your trainee.. the Warrior, for he is a transvestite, perhaps he ought to rent an aforementioned Ed Wood movie entitled "Glen or Glenda." It's quite a wonderful.. heh.. piece of cinema. Now I am sure.... that I am a "sick dude", but I may also be a slick dude.. my fine friend. I am not sure... why I am a "sick dude".. possibly if I took a sip of water and got the dreaded Montozuma's Revenge.. but other than that, perhaps you have me confused with another person. Because no matter what move you are able to "throw" at me... it wont matter, you lack the psychological edge...hmm.. you seem to also suffer from ADHD.. you are unable to keep to the topic at hand my green friend.

::smiling and shaking his head::

(fade)

 

[Diablo]

(CUEUP: "God's Away On Business" by Tom Waits.)

(FADEIN: Angel Castillo, wearing his new "¡¡¡PICANTE!!!" t-shirt available at GLCW shows and GLCW.com, in his Chicago apartment, reclining on his couch, with an indifferent expression on his face.)

Angel Castillo: *Sigh* You know, I'm frankly not surprised you don't remember me, not just because your brain has such limited capacity you can barely remember what happened three days ago, but I know that the beating I gave you was particularly sublime, and perhaps it was just enough head trauma to give you amnesia. But then again, I am just a memory almost every wrestler wishes to purge, because it is usually accompanied by intense disgrace or fear.

(El Diablo re-adjusts himself on the couch and takes a more dissastisfied look.)

Castillo: And only you, so naturally you, would have to uphold your gruff bad-ass, army boots image to go so far as implying that simply visiting my parents and sharing some quality time is a sign of weakness. You're probably the kind of guy that has some daaaaark, mysteeeerious, friiiightneningly spoooooky past where your parents didn't hug you enough as a child so now you're angry at the world, and wish you never had a family, or you're the kind of guy who just simply left home and left their parents crying on their doorstep because they just left to become a fearless warrior who never loves! But, I am neither, sad to say. Nope. I come from a background that does not preclude any mental instability that all my opponents should be aware of, or some inherent darkness in my soul that I promise will consume any one who comes near me. I just have a mom, and have a dad, whom I love, and like to see every now and then just to let them know they still have a son! Pardon me for having a heart, and revering the very thing that makes me human, Mr. McMillain...but that's just the way I was made. You may want me so much to just be selling trinkets by the roadside, but I'm afraid I will be in that ring, facing you one on one. You can sit there in your dilapidated ring calling me names, attacking me for committing a very plain deed, only because that is your only refuge from the truth. The truth which is that I am simply more talented than you. The truth that I do not need any special look or settings for my promos, like a ring to show that I spend every day practicing to be mediocre...the truth that I am just a little too much...¡¡¡PICANTE!!!

(FTB)

------------------------------
"Life is what happens when you're making other plans"
-John Lennon

 

[QFCWarren]

RE: ashes to ashes... dust to dust.

Warren A. Nickolson:Well well looks like I got under Ash's skin huh? Listen Ash I realized one thing about you. You have no talent,no charisma and pretty much no wrestling skills at all.
The Emerald Warrior:Oh Ash just to let you know that you will be the star in our movie called Ash has been turned to ASHES! When I put you in my torture rack you will never be the same again.
Warren A. Nickolson:Mr.Ash I realized you was schooled on Seattle history. That's good to hear because Seattle is a great place to visit. Home of the Space Needle. The observation deck is great. I take my protege there and think of how many ways to destroy you. I'm wondering why such a idiot let you in wrestling school and you have learned nothing from it.:9
The Emerald Warrior:I have learned long ago never to underestimate my opponent and also never say die attitude. But remember Ash there is no one better than me.
Warren A. Nickolson:Yeah that's true and just to let you know Ash I'm his manager and Ash since you don't recognize that then you are an idiot. I think you IQ is 43. Yeah way to go Ash. My IQ is 135. The Emerald Warrior's is 120. At least you are doing something with your life.
The Emerald Warrior:Well Warren we have said enough so let's say this to Ash. Can you feel it coming Ash? Can you see what is coming in front of you? Then you will know that The Emerald Warrior is going to destroy you!!!
Warren A Nickolson:Let's get it on dude!
This broadcast has been brought to you by public access show called The Emerald Warrior tells the truth!

 

[zeroxxzero]

RE: ashes to ashes... dust to dust.

(fade in: close up shot of the first few lines of the book we all know as War and Peace. The camera zooms out and Ash is scanning the pages of the book.)

..under my skin? Well, unless you are a rabbi… the only skin you will be getting under is my… For, maybe there is a lot of reasons for you to think you are getting under my skin.. but alas, it is not to be. See.. you are merely a pest to be swatted away by the paradigm of psychology. Yes.. psychology my friend something you think you poses , but obviously do not.. you lack that oh so important edge… but apparently in your make believe world you poses some sort of integrity, intelligence, and a slue of other words starting with I, that can be found in any near by lexicon.

Seeing you are able to see through me and notice I lack any charisma, which may be true.. or it may be false it’s all a matter of interpretation. You also seem to be some sort of soothsayer, able to see into the future and even before seeing me take on your Emerald Warrior can attempt to visualize my wrestling talent… I suppose you are the new Nostradomus, or a VALET at a loss for words. I say the second is more acceptable.. don’t you? ::clears throat:: now on to my lackluster opponent … Green Warrior.. for Emeralds are far too expensive, beautiful, and awe-inspiring for you to be called anything containing that word. You continue to babble on about a movie you will have me star in, I will make sure to have my people call your people.. heh..I am quite the comedian dontcha’ say? I take it by your looks.. and constant attraction to bondage makes me seriously believe this movie will be more of a snuff film than a wrestling match, be what it may… it will be interesting to see you fail.. heh or wiped.

Now… Mr. Nickolson, I am very well educated in case you were unable to tell, unlike you who slurs the English language in a unheard of amount of ways. I think, and yes, I think regularly… that the wonderful Space Needle which is the crown jewel of Seattle should be the home to my after party… after of course I take you on in one of the least spectacular matches of my career… I will even charter a plane and stick you in coach.. or with the luggage. Or maybe… send you and your young protogé Mr. Warrior to some GED classes.. so you may raise your IQ’s.. or at least learn the god damned.. English language..

::Ash pauses, seemingly appalled by his comments::

I apologize, it is just that people such as you… disgust me… your ignorance, lack of décor, lack of… contempt for something some beautiful. By the look of both of you…you should be conjoined, with…Mr. Nickolsons’ lips stuck to your derrière. Warrior, you are even unable to make statements by yourself.. you must ask permission of your ringleader…why is that? Are you afraid he’ll beat you in the back room? And.. so you know, I can see it perfectly fine.. the demise of a never-was.

::Ash lets the book drop to the floor::

(fade)

 

[SteveA]

Complacent?

(the screen comes in on the same GLCW backdrop we have come to know and love, and in front of it stands Jean Rabesque, dressed in complete black, no special merchandise tonight, but he slowly removes his shades, and speaks)

Rabesque: Complacent? Complacent eh Sean? That’s the word you had to describe me, complacent. Now, Sean, I thought you said I was the one who was full of idiocy. Listen to yourself Sean. Are you that desperate to try to find something, ANYTHING, to try to discredit me? Is that where we are now? Hell, Sean, look at the facts. I have become anything but complacent. My record speaks for itself. Undefeated in both singles and tag team action here in the GLCW, and come to speak of it, a much higher contender than one Sean Edmunds. Then I want to that “other’ beloved wrestling federation and became the World Champion, WHILE YOU WERE IN THE LEAGUE! Does that sound complacent to you? Ruling over a league that you wrestled in Sean? Complacent? Hardly. My thirst is the strive for constant and consistent excellence, to be the best in the world, and to be remembered as the best in the history of the business. No, Sean, I’m not complacent, it’s just that my thirst is far different than yours. Mine isn’t like some childhood crush. I don’t wake up in the morning or go to bed at night seeing images of those who I haven’t beaten. (chuckles) Come to think of it, that wouldn’t really leave anyone anyway. But no Sean, my competition is against myself, because I have PUNKS like you thinking they really are something, aiming for me, OBSESSING over me, doing everything in their power to end A SIX-YEAR losing streak.

So yes, you are pathetic Sean, and you’re a piece of crap, just like I said before. And I’m also sorry that you have take solace knowing, as you said it, “knowing that the only victories I have over you are not even one on one.” Victories? Victories, Sean? When did that become a plural term? No, Sean, victory, the biggest win of your life, your ONE tainted victory in a tag team match. That’s all, there is nothing multiple about this except how many times I’ve pounded your ass into the ground. And that includes the last time we met Sean. You can take that “I got a taste of you” crap and shove it! You got a taste and that you ran like the little ##### that you are. Nothing more, nothing less Sean. You trying to sugarcoat the events doesn’t change a thing. You ran because you couldn’t take the heat. So what’s going to happen this time Sean? What’s going to happen when things don’t go your way, when a taped fist knocks you in the back of the head? You going to run? (chuckles) I’ve never run from a fight in my life Sean, sure I’ve picked my spots, but you are not ONE TENTH the man I am. A lot has changed since the last time we met, and I don’t doubt for one second you’ve improved, but BETTER does not necessarily mean GOOD Sean.

(Rabesque pauses for a moment to collect his thoughts)

If you polish up a piece of S(FCC)T Sean, it’s still the same material, now matter how good you make it look on the outside. That’s you right now Sean, a polished up piece of S(FCC)T! Theatrics are the polish Sean, just like you talked about, WRESTLING is what’s on the inside. Sure, go ahead and love the theatrics, I’ll stick to what I do well, (laughs) and frankly Sean, that’s beating the living hell out of you! Everything else really matters none to me. No false gimmicks, no false hype, I am Jean Rabesque.

(fade out)

 

[Vertigo]

Foregoing Fun (in Favor of Malice)...

(Cue Up: "Deep" by Nine Inch Nails. Fade into Golem, sitting in a slightly torn couch in a room in his house. A large bookshelf is beside him with a few books littering the ground around it. Golem scans the bookshelf with his eyes, scanning over books such as "Inferno" and "The Works of Shakespeare", then slowly turns and faces the camera.)

Golem: You know, I guess Golem gets this interesting wrap. Everyone says that Golem is not a jokester, he isn't a fun loving guy. Maybe that's true. It seems the only thing I ever entertain myself with is a book in the evening. That, and when I am the ring. Not with midgets, or Magic cards, or even Weeble action figures. I savor the humor of watching people squirm and spasm in the Claw. I relish the look of fear and regret in their watering eyes, wishing they had taken Golem more seriously. Michael Manson, maybe the reason I fight the same people several times is because to just beat someone once isn't enough. They push their bravado and churn their propaganda machine and think that Golem will be scared and run. Then, of course, the match begins and the harsh reality sets in. So, after I of course defeat them, I figure it might be fitting to give them another chance. Only sporting, eh? Well, Manson, you prove to be of an extraordinarily rare breed. Rarer than the Pandorians, 7 foot, 2 foot, or otherwise. You have tasted the Claw and yet you use shiny rationalizations to shade it from your memory. You know why? Because you think that the Masked Blazer is going to there to protect you. You think that you can focus your attention, and by attention, I more specifically mean your Tempest-led "training" regiment on Maelstrom because you think that Masked Blazer can slow me down. But seriously, that's not going to be the case at all, you've got to understand that. You are more or less going into a handicap match, with a silent but more importantly weak partner, against two of the most dominant forces in GLCW. All you who here stand before Golem, listen and understand. There is no escape, Manson. No chess board, be it doused in gasoline or not, will stop the on-coming tsunami of devastation. Nothing you can do will stop the undertow from pulling you out, out away from your sanctuary. Dragging you to the feet of Golem, bathing warm in streaming crimson. No cream can save you from the thrashing Golem will deliver. (Golem chuckles) I hate to break the chain. I know you guys were set to run with this comic relief act, but Golem was not born for comedy. His specialty has always been the tradegies. And I believe this match will be no different. I have a great ending planned out in my head, Manson. It involves a spark, a flash, and a claw. It speaks stories of revenge and torment. Don't you hate it how whenever you see a movie, the monster never seems to win? Well, I have a much more realistic view on things, Manson, and in Toledo, I will prove that it is only the strong who survive...(Golem smirks slowly)...Checkmate.

(The camera fades to black.)

 

[TheOriginalSE]

Full of ....

((FADEIN: 'Simply Sensational' Sean Edmunds is standing alone in a restaurant that is full of people sitting down. The chatter of the restaurant fills the air as Edmunds is smiling resting on pillar. He has his hands folded on his chest, his winter jacket zippered up. His smile slowly goes away as he begins to talk.))

EDMUNDS: "Yes, Jean. I guess you heard what I said. And you made some very good points. You see, you were World Champion. You were World Champion. And I guess you bringing up that point that while I was in the promotion, you sat atop it. And it must bring a smile to your face. As it did during your promo. But, you see, Jean, that does nothing to me. Because I, too, was World Champion in that promotion. And for a much longer time than you were. I sat atop the same promotion for nine months. I brought stability to that title that you held afterwards. I brought it back from the dead. While it was wilting away in the hands of hasbeens and nobodies. And once I brought credibility to it, I realized there was nothing else I could do to better it. And so I moved on to try to salvage the next title. And what did I do, Jean? I went, and I won that title as well. And while those Tag Team titles might not have had the same power as the World Title, I went out and did what I said I was going to do.. I won them. Sure I had a partner, but really now, what did he do? He was merely a requirement filler. You see, you can't be the Tag Team champion by yourself, you need a second. I found a second. And I became the World Tag Team champion. Didn't you ever ask yourself why I never asked for a shot at your World Title, Jean? It was because I didn't want one. I could have received one. I would have received one on the spot had I made my inquiry. But I never did. I was finished with that World Title. Hell, I was finished with that promotion by that point. My contract was coming to an end, and I had no desire to sign an extension. So, Jean, before you try to make a point and belittle me, do your homework. You held my sloppy seconds. The title you try to use against me was the title I MADE. Thank you very much, Jean. I'm glad you seem to think you benefitted from it. I sure as hell enjoy seeing you gloat about it."

((Edmunds stands up straight as he walks over to the bar of the restaurant. He pulls up a seat and turns his body so that, instead of sitting facing towards the bar, he's facing the camera.))

EDMUNDS: "I'm pathetic. That's fine, Jean. But it'll be a cold day in hell when I become the monotonous, uncreative blob that you've become. Because while you ramble on to whoever you face in our interval between our grand fight, I'll be moving forward. Your complacency has set in in your ability to change with the times. Its not your staying power, its your weakness. And pretty soon, after all is said and done, Jean Rabesque will fail to exist. He will have failed to cope with new times that require new things. I ran like the little (BLEEP) I am, Jean? I have no clue what you are talking about? After my victory in that tag team match, I went on competing. It's not my fault that Skieler was an imbocile. Why fight you and Martinez by myself? Skieler couldn't handle it, and I wasn't in the mood to prove to the GLCW that I was more than you and Martinez could handle. Don't forget Jean, I called you out here in the GLCW. If thats running from you, Jean, then you sure as hell have got a warped mind. You spew lies wherever you go. Its as if you keep talking hoping that somewhere, someday someone will stop, look at you like they once did, and remember 'hey, he was once someone that had a bright future in wrestling.' But you know what, Jean? No one will stop and listen anymore. They've heard your bull(BLEEP) before, and like I've said before, it hasn't changed one bit. This taped fists match is going to be a prelude to what you have coming your way. Finally a one on one encounter, the first in what, six years? Don't think I'm going to run from this. (shakes head) Oh no, Jean, I'm ready."

((Edmunds turns to the bar and orders a vodka martini, shaken not stirred. The bartender takes his money and starts to make the drink.))

EDMUNDS: "Here you go talking about what you know best, Jean. (BLEEP) . And why is it what you know best? It's because you're full of it. Right up to your ears. You keep talking, Jean. You keep telling yourself that you can still handle me. I'm not that same pathetic wrestler you faced six years ago. I've become TEN TIMES the man you are. And I continue to grow each and everyday.. while you remain, yes, Jean, while you remain complacent in yourself. You are your competition, Jean. You mind is your competition. And your mouth is your competition. I've got the talent these days, Jean. I have got the will to win, at any cost. And I've also got a score that I'll only BEGIN to settle with you at this house show. You can call me pathetic, Jean. You can say that I'm full of (BLEEP) and that I'll never in my LIFE attain such glory as you have. But the fact of the matter is you're wrong. You've been wrong and you'll be proven wrong. Your whole world will start to crumble at this house show, Jean, once you realize that you can't even handle Sean Edmunds. And once this destruction is complete, you'll finally see that all those accolades you try to throw in my face, that World Title that you held that I grew bored of, will mean NOTHING. There's no false hype in Jean Rabesque. But the fact is, nowadays, there's no hype at all in Jean Rabesque. He's become midcard fodder that the GLCW throws in just to round out a card. (smiles) No gimmicks? No false hype? It doesn't matter. Sean Edmunds is 'SIMPLY' (pauses) SENSATIONAL."

((FADEOUT: As Edmunds turns around and gets his drink. He takes a sip as the camera fades to black.))

 

[SteveA]

Buy a clue

(the screen comes in on the same backdrop, where Rabesque stands, dressed in all black, gazing into the camera once he removes his sunglasses, dons a rather cocky smile, and speaks)

Rabesque: You just can’t buy a clue, can you Edmunds? You see, one of the wraps about me is that I like to repeat things a bit. And, to be honest with you, I have to agree that that is the truth. But there is a reason behind that. That’s because dense people like you don’t understand things the first..... hundred times, so it needs to be pointed out a little more clearly every single time. Case in point, you make the claim that you held that specific world title for nine months before I came to the league. That’s right, Sean, allow me to repeat that last part, BEFORE I CAME TO THE LEAGUE! Congratu-frickin-lations Sean, your biggest claim to fame besides beating me in a meaningless house show match is holding a title for nine months against the lowest forms of life on the planet. You said it yourself, it had been writhing in the hands of has-beens and nobodies. Well, what kind of person did you beat to win that title? Probably either a has-been...... or a nobody. What can of person did you have to defend that title against? (chuckles to himself) I think you see the point. Just because you win a title and hold it for a long time doesn’t make it worth anything. It’s about who you beat, and you defend it against. Another case in point, I wrestled in one of the most mediocre wrestling leagues in the world of a few years back. Bad promoter, bad venues, and for the most part, bad talent. But I beat a few of the best in the world on my way to winning their world championship. Therefore, a title that should have meant nothing, all of a sudden became meaningful, because of the competition.

But the funny thing about this Sean, is that you didn’t have the belt when I arrived, and you never came close to it again. Sure, you can claim that you were, “moving on to other things,” but the reality is you really didn’t have a choice. You were on the top of the world, the top of the league, until Jean Rabesque arrived. And then, in my third match, MY THIRD MATCH, I become World’s Heavyweight Champion, and that plummeting sound you could have heard was Sean Edmunds falling further and further down the card. So, you decided to move down to the midcard utopia that was the tag team ranks. And you won yourself a title. You know why Sean? BECAUSE I DIDN’T WANT IT! I was too busy fighting for the REAL world title at the time, but if I had decided to focus my energy on the tag team ranks, the same result would have happened. You see, Sean, I didn’t hold your “sloppy seconds,” I only helped restore what you helped tarnish, that’s all. No more, no less.

(Rabesque pauses for a moment to compose his thoughts, a look of slight refection passes over his face, and then returns to normal)

Creativity outside the ring has never been my strong suit. I don’t need clever names, I don’t need to try to be like Bond when I order a beverage. It’s just not my thing. Am I monotonous? Sure. Can I be boring to listen to? Probably, but does any of that really matter? (chuckles) Definitely hasn’t mattered in the past Sean, and I don’t really see anything changing. But in the ring, I’ve been changing, and if you think I haven’t, then you obviously haven’t been doing your homework Sean. Watch a few tapes from 96 and 97, and watch me now. I’m not the same man I was. I’m so much better now Sean. I’ve learned, I’ve gained even more experience, and while time might not be on my side physically, it sure as hell is psychologically. I got the edge already. There are so many different ways I can attack you. All of which are effective, none of which are expected. Is it coming by air, through the ground, or through my fist? (chuckles) You see Sean, I have done my homework, and even though my fist will be taped, there are more ways than one to take you out.

(Rabesque begins to get a bit irritable, and a slight change in attitude takes place)

I was right when I said you were a coward, when I said you ran from the fight. You had a tag match Edmunds, and you ran away. You knew that myself and Martinez would destroy you just like we did with Skieler. And you called me out? You say this with pride Edmunds? Let’s see if I can quote this correctly, you said, “Don't forget Jean, I called you out here in the GLCW. If that's running from you, Jean, then you sure as hell have got a warped mind.” ARE YOU SERIOUS? Sure, you called me out Sean, and then what did you? YOU RAN! You ran like the little piece of crap that you are. And do I seem to recall you hiding behind a bathroom stall? You see Sean, you’ve blindsided me every single time you’ve wanted to fight. You have no honor. You have run and you have hid. Now, something there is to be admired. The “Art of War” talks about never taking a superior opponent on directly, so you’ve tried your guerilla war with the superior opponent. But now what happens when you can’t do that anymore Sean? There’s no ducking me once the bell sounds. This is when you meet the superior force head on.

(Rabesque relaxes a bit, and starts to grow more noticeably calm)

I’ve never disputed the fact that you have talent, Sean. (chuckles) You’re just not as good as me. But I know you’re there Sean, constantly pushing, trying to make it to the top tier of wrestlers, a pinnacle that you will never achieve. But still, people like you drive me. You drive me NOT to be complacent with myself, you drive me to CONSTANTLY get better. things haven’t changed, I’m still the master, and you’re still the little piece of crap. And if being midcard fodder gets you ranked #3 in the GLCW, then I’m content being midcard fodder Sean, because it still means I’m better than you. I think the world is finding out right now that everything you say is a load of crap, and you have no justification for any of the stuff you spew. It’s just how it is Sean, like it or not, it’s the way it has to be. No false gimmicks, no false hype, I am Jean Rabesque.

(fade out)

 

[TheOriginalSE]

the World is Not Enough..

((FADEIN: Early Thanksgiving morning. Edmunds is sitting at his table on Edmunds Estates in Boston, Massachusetts. There is nothing on the table except a cup of hot chocolate. Edmunds takes a sip of the chocolate and wipes the whipped cream from his lip afterwards. He cracks his knuckles and rests his arms outward on the back of the chair. He stretches his neck and yawns before speaking.))

EDMUNDS: "Jean, Jean, Jean. You disappoint me greatly. I was expecting our words going into this house show to be a little more poignant and grand. And yet there you are, taking away my hopes. Talking about what you do best, mediocricy. I'm finished trying to compare our pasts in a previous promotion. You're past common sense. The fact that you try to dispute the fact that I was the longest reigning World Champion in that league since its inception six years prior is beyond me. Its not as if that was my only World Title reign, I held it three times there. Each time when I wanted it. And I'm sure your also saying that "Well, you also lost it three times, Edmunds." And while that'd be typical Jean Rabesque bantering, let me just clear your thoughts now. I didn't lose it three times. In fact, I only lost it oh, we can say, I only lost it technically twice. With the reality I only lost it once. You see Jean, I don't care about our past anymore. Its too far away now to even try to compare ourselves. I don't know what calibur your on and you don't know what calibur I am at. The one thing we can do is try to guess. The only thing from our past that will drive me is the fact that I don't have a victory against you one on one. I discount all those victories you hold over me because they're worthless now. Those were different times. And listening to you jabber on about how you entered a mediocre promotion and took its top title, well, that only tells me what I already knew, Jean. You're mediocre. You bounce from place to place on your everending quest to try to prove something. Something that you're not. And while you might, at first, seem to bring instant credibility to a league, people need to look past that. Once they realize that the Jean Rabesque the league has gotten is the same Jean Rabesque he was years ago, well, then they will begin to notice just how disappointing you are, as I have."

((Edmunds takes another sip, this time no whipped cream is on his lip.))

EDMUNDS: "Creativity is everything, Jean. And while I might enjoy the same drinks that a fictional superspy might enjoy, it doesn't reflect my creativity. It reflects my fine taste for what I want to drink. What does that have to do with your lack of creativity, Jean? Nothing. Why even bring it up if it weren't for some alterior motive? Are you trying to say that these grand illusions of victory are just that, illusions? Or is this just another one of your pointless thoughts that invade your words? I've noticed changes in the ring, Jean. Nothing spectacular. You might have changed, Jean, but Sean Edmunds has evolved. From one level to the next, and I'm afraid, in this transformation, I've leapfrogged past you. I am not content with complacency, Jean. I am not content like you are just going into different places trying to prove something that I am not. And while you talk of how you win World Titles in your third match, I start to slowly (pauses) fall (pauses) asleep. It just shows how weak your competition was. I certainly wasn't involved. I was busy enough as it was moving on. And you can tell yourself all you want that I never got close to that title again, but the fact is I didn't want it anymore. I told you before, if I wanted that shot, I would have gotten it. Without a doubt, Jean. Without a doubt. But I digress. Time might not be on your side, phsyically. Nor psychologically. Your games have become tired, Jean. You see, you're in the ring with someone more than five years your junior. Do you honestly think you can keep up with me? My body isn't weathered. My mind isn't torn. My drive and determination will lead me in Toledo, and thats an unfortunate thing for you. All your banter, all your useless words will come back crammed down your throat."

((Edmunds stands up and puts the empty cup in the sink before walking back to the table. He stands by the chair he was just sitting in with his hands resting on the top.))

EDMUNDS: "I had a tag match, Jean. But hell, you said it yourself in the days leading up to it, I don't play well with others. Even you, self-professed master, know this (winks) first-hand. Years and years of trying to team with people who were far below my skill has made me jaded, Jean. Skieler was no benefit. He was a hindrance. How can anyone expect me to have to carry that weight on my shoulders? I went in there, and I wrestled. I did everything I was to do. But when it came down to the end, and I watched Jon Skieler SCREW UP EVERYTHING I WORKED FOR.. (calms down) Well, I had to walk away. I didn't want to do something I'd regret, and when I introduced the chair into Martinez's, your's and Skieler's skulls.. well that made me feel a little bit better. Because in the end, I walked out feeling just as refreshed as I did when I walked in, with no noticeable damage. The tag match was a wash, Jean. I got my taste. And then I walked away. Not ran away, Jean. Walked. Because I knew I would get you to myself .. alone. And now here you are. In a box with a bow, on my doorstep. Just screaming put me out of my misery. You're not superior anymore, Jean. When will you realize this? Perhaps once I knock you unconcious at this house show? Perhaps later down the line when I pin you in the middle of the ring at a televised event or, god forbid, a pay-per-view event? What will you do then, Jean? Once you realize that you are no longer the master you have so long clinged to retain. The bell will ring, Jean, but it will not ring for me. I shall move on from this encounter envisioning the greater battle that lies ahead. Once more I will get a taste of Jean Rabesque, and this time, when I walk away, I will also be bringing along the first victory that I will hold over you in singles action."

((Edmunds pushes in the chair and starts walking through the dining room. He stops at the door leading him to the living room. He turns and smiles as he rests on the wall.))

EDMUNDS: "No justification for the things I say? After the Taped Fists match, Jean, everything shall be justified. I don't need your recognition of my talent. I've known for the longest time that I have the talent. Its all about getting you to see, Jean. See that for the first time in your career, that I've got not only the talent, but also the dedication to defeating you one on one. You can beat me different ways, Jean, but you won't. Whether its by air, ground or whatever, it'll be you making the mistake. You can't afford to make mistakes, Jean. I'm not green anymore. I'm not misguided. I know exactly what I want to do, and when its going to happen. The time has come, Jean. You've been holding a place in my mind for way too long. I will start to erase you from my memory at this house show. You've been holding me back by complicating my thoughts. The house show is just the beginning of my (smirks) collision course with the superior opponent. Don't be surprised Jean, when the superior opponent becomes unlodged.. Don't be surprised Jean, when the superior opponent becomes dishevelled.. and Jean, please don't be surprised when the superior opponent's foundation breaks and he falls to earth."

((Edmunds walks up to the camera..))

EDMUNDS: "The world might look at me and realize that everything I say is crap, Jean. But the World is Not Enough to keep me down. And neither are you. You're content being midcard fodder, Jean. That's fine. Because that's all you'll ever be. I'm content just being 'SIMPLY' (pauses) 'SENSATIONAL'."

((FADEOUT: As Edmunds puts his hand up to the lense. FTB.))

 

[RaskalRogue]

A day for giving thanks!

(Fade in to a non-descript interstate, packed on both sides with far too many Harris Teeter trucks, loaded-down minivans, and Hondas. It's that time, again... The camera zooms back out and we see we are looking down from a bridge, inside a lightly packed Nissan Sentra. In the front sit Nick and Xanatos, joking about nothing in particular and mocking the traffic...coincidentally, the traffic they are about to enter. Xanatos turns to face the camera, his shiny silver shirt glinting in the morning sun.)

Xanatos: Well...seein as we have a great deal of time on our hands, I figured why not make light of the situation and make fun of our newest opponent?! Happy Turkey Day, Gridlock! And look at what your name causes all these happy folk to deal with? Why...gridlock of course!! I'm a bit surprised ya have yet to cut a promo, but that's ok. You OBVIOUSLY realize you have no chance against me. Pansy.

Ya know what, Gridlock? (moves closer to camera) I don't like people like you. Ya tick me off. You sit there, holdin in all you want to say, all you ACHE to say to me. Ya create your own gridlock inside your body. And ya know what? THAT TICKS ME OFF!!! I don't need stuff like that! Bein silent and runnin track, that's different. But this ain't track. I've been there and I didn't like it. It's like runnin from your problems. Runnin from the LOVIN father I never had. Damn, it IS like you're runnin from your problems. Because I AM YOUR PROBLEM! YOU--

(Nick cuts him off, partially to shut him up and partially because our wonderful Americans enjoy failing to look as they change lanes...nearly slamming the Sentra.)

Nick: --Of course, we will remember that Gridlock is pitted against not one, but two of us. Gridlock, I hope you're ready...because we don't mess around. Xanatos has the anger, I have the skill. And with those two, you better PRAY that you will win. Because while this gridlock on the interstate may be road-rage-creating, I can and will get out of it. And we will overtake it. Just as we will overtake you. There was a time I was in your position, Gridlock... but, unlike you, I WON. I beat down the opposition and--

Xanatos: --like my father beat me down... HE AIN'T SINGIN NOW!!! Jeremy, you are the best brotha around. GRIDLOCK, don't think for one SECOND that you have a chance. My brotha is HALF as hardened as I am, and he sent my extremely well-built dad to the ICU.

Nick: In short, eat as much as you can today, because it'll be awhile before you're eating again. Xanatos, anything left to say?

Xanatos: I AM JUST THE BEST THERE IS! THERE IS NO DENYIN IT! Get in there ready for that 3 count, BEGGIN for that 3 count! Cuz I will be ALL over you! Even Nick here won't get a move in, edgewise! Happy Turkey Day t'that.

Nick: Only...I will. But we'll discuss this matter later.

(Fade out as the car turns away from the gridlock, having found the solution to their problem.)

 

[Devil666]

Reluctant for the spotlight

(The camera opens outside The Toledo Sports Arena. On a large marquee the outline of the GLCW logo is shown in lights. On the sidewalk the footsteps of a lone figure dressed in black walk slowly. His feet makes heavy thuds of thick leather soles on pavement. A long jacket hangs from his shoulders and covers any discernable trademarks. The man stops and stands in what little light the sign gives off. The camera zooms from the shadows and half shaded stares back the face of Jarod Poe)

Poe: So this is Showtime? That's what you call yourself right James. "Showtime" Steven James. Well I'm not seeing it. No for a man who seems to want the bright lights of fame and glory your very silient when it comes to me. Are you scared? Have the rumors of my frame of mind gotten to you. Have yuo heard the whispers backstage that Blazer has pushed me just alittle TOO far this time. While I walk the streets of Toledo here at night in anticipation of our upcoming match...Where are you? Where is Showtime? Well kiddies I'll tell you where he is. He's hiding in the corner wishing he'd never run across "The Torture King" You see Steven...I'm looking for another victim...the beast still hungers when I close my eyes at night. He needs to be feed and your next.

(Jarod slowly turns and leans his back to the arena wall. He taps it with his hand and smiles)

Poe: See Steven I have a much bigger plan in mind. Blazer and I are just even now. We're level with each other. Ah, but since you've been little distraction for me over the last week Steven I've had plenty of time to rest my wicked prayers onto one Masked Blazer. The deep dark thoughts have crept back in my mind. I try to keep them away, but more and more they bang on the door. They knock...knock and pound until I can't keep them away anymore. My mind is flooded with twisated images of The Blazer in pain. I must follow through on them...must bring the dreams alive. Then and only then will they go away. Your bit a distraction from them Steven...The Blazer...he is who they are all for. Wicked Prayers Steven...Wicked Prayers...oh how he will turn and prey he never caused them.

(Jarod leans forward and again he walks down the sidewalk. It's mostly black, only his face can be seen under the far too few streetlamps. His heavyfoot steps are the only thing to be heard when his voice trails off)

Poe: Don't feel overlooked though Steven. I've got plenty of my attention for you. Perhpas more then you could have ever wanted. I'll give you your due...I won't short change you on your shot at me. Not Steven I plan on given you ALL that you deserve. The question on my mind is...are you sure you want that? See you've shown a lack of desire in my mind. A lack of wanting. Well I guess in the end that will be your problem ALL the more. See I have no lack of wanting Steven...In fact I have perhpas to much. When all is said and done...well see if all your silience was because you WANTED nothing to do with me.

(Jarod takes a look back at the date on the sign)

Poe: Just a few hours now Steven..."Showtime" is going to be your downfall. See you there

(Jarod walks off intot he darkness only footsteps can be heard)

<FTB>

 

[SteveA]

Die Another Day

(the screen comes in backstage at a locker room, probably in Toledo, but that is never directly stated, but here sits Jean Rabesque, lacing his boots, already dressed in his black t-shirt and full-length pants that consist of his wrestling gear, as he laces, he looks up and acknowledges the camera, and then looks back towards what he is doing, and while he is doing this, he speaks)

Rabesque: Once again, Sean, I really don’t mind whatever you say about me. You want to call me mediocre? Fine, go ahead. Mediocrity is relative Sean, so if you want to label that, fine, but you’re labeling the very best in the world as mediocre. Therefore, everybody, every last wrestler in the GLCW is worse than mediocre. And you? It’d be pretty hard to find words to describe you that I can say in polite company if I’m mediocre Sean. Moving on right along, I never tried to dispute the fact that you were a world champion. I never argued that you held it for three times, and for the longest amount of time in that league’s history. Never did Sean, never cared to dispute that, because I know you did all of those things. Simply Sean, my point is that you held that belt at the lowest point in that league’s history. You got the belt because there was no one else to give it to. You more or less won that thing by default because anyone with actual talent had either fled or hadn’t arrived yet. You won that talent by being loyal Sean, it had absolutely nothing to do with your skill. Holding a belt for a long time means NOTHING if you beat no one for it, and no one challenged for it. Get that through your thick skull RIGHT NOW! And once again, Sean, if I was mediocre when I entered your mediocre promotion and took the title in my third match there, what does that make you? If I’m mediocre, and I was the World Champion, and you weren’t... (smiles) I think you can feel in the rest for yourself Sean.

(he has now completed his lacing, and looks up at the camera)

And then there was again the quote of the day Sean, “Are you trying to say that these grand illusions of victory are just that, illusions?” Well, when it comes to you Sean, that’s exactly what I’m saying. Everything you’ve spoken about, everything we’ve been forced to hear about, is exactly an illusion. I don’t know where this happened, Sean, but somewhere in this long process we call professional wrestling, you got a greatly overinflated perception of your own wrestling abilities. I think it might be the fact that you lied to yourself for so long, about what marginal skills you do have, that you actually started to believe the crap you spew. You actually believe now in all your own hype. You claim you haven’t changed, but instead you’ve EVOLVED. Fine, evolving doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re still worth anything. You’ve evolved from a naive piece of crap to a pompous piece of crap. That’s it, Sean, no more, no less. Everything you’ve won in the past is because I wasn’t there. In the past, you moved on to those “secondary” tag titles because you knew deep down you no longer had a chance at my belt. And as far as inferior competition? If you claim the current Great Lakes champion and FINAL UNIFIED Champion to be that, then I plead guilty as charged.

Hypocrite is also a word that I have to use to describe you Sean. You talk about how I spew the same thing over, and over, which is something I’ve more or less admitted. It’s because I need to reiterate myself to the idiotic people out there like yourself that just don’t get it. But still, what do you think you’ve been doing for the last three spots that we’ve had to sit through? Look, we understand that you think Skieler screwed you over. We get the fact that you feel he was ruining everything you worked for. Yeah, we got it. We got the fact that you think you’re better than you were, and now all of a sudden you’re a holier than thou wrestling deity. Yeah, we got it Sean, you can stop telling us about it right now. The sad part is, not only do you continue to say the same things repeatedly, but you continue to say the same IDIOTIC things over and over again. What am I going to do when you beat me on television? (chuckles) That, fortunately, is something I am NEVER going to have to worry about.

(Rabesque starts to laugh at himself a bit, as he knows when he has planned to say next)

So, Sean, the next thing I have to say, I guess would be “For Your Eyes Only.” You see after I get done with you, I can’t accept what’s going to happen to you, or what you’re going to look like. You might need a “Goldfinger” or maybe even a “Goldeneye.” Hell, the only job you meet be able to get is, “On Her Majesty’s Secret Service.” And while I might not have a “License to Kill,” and may not be “The Man With the Golden Gun,” and hell, I don’t even know what a “Thunderball,” is, by the time I get done with you, you’d be wishing “You Can Only Live Twice.” But “Tomorrow Never Dies,” Sean, but tomorrow is not going to be an enjoyable day for you. You’re going to be “A View to a Kill,” after I knock “The Living Daylights,” out of you. “The Spy Who Loved Me,” will vomit when she sees what I’ve done to you. When might say “Live and Let Die,” but I can’t do that Sean, I have way too much invested in this. “Diamonds are Forever?”, no they’re not Sean, but gold is, and THAT is what I have in my sights, and “The World is Not Enough,” to contain me. And if you’re lucky Sean, you just might, MIGHT get a chance to “Die Another Day,” after I’m through with you. Maybe we’ll just put you on the “Moonraker,” along with “Dr. No,” and you can send me postcards “From Russia, With Love.” That’s all Sean, and while I might not have appropriately been able to work in “Octopussy,” I think you can imagine what I’m thinking you’re going to look like after we’re through. We’re just a few minutes away 007, you think you’re ready? I think I’m ready to pull out some action that Ian Fleming himself would be proud of. Oh, and one more thing about those movies that is important to remember, Sean. (smiles) The good guy always wins. No false gimmicks, no false hype, I am Jean Rabesque.

(fade out, as Rabesque begins to leave the locker room to head to the ring)

(OORP: I had NO idea it would be so hard to work all 20 titles in, LOL)

 

[Mister Dread]

::FADEIN on the GLCW banner backstage. THE WOLF stands there, attired as usual::

THE WOLF: You're right, Angel. You don't need any special props in your promos. Of course, it's outlandish that I'd be seen in a wrestling wring, seeing as how I'm a wrestler. My "special prop ring" sure couldn't fool you, right? You saw right through THAT little masquerade. No props or special settings for you, right? Lounging around on the couch was an excellent way to get your point across. I mean, you were sitting on the couch! You're obviously a man to be feared and respected.

THE WOLF: But as far as your speculation as to my past, well ... you were just a tad off. Unfortunately, my past was not as mysterious and spooky as you think, as much as I wish it were. It was pretty boring. But you, on the other hand ... one could only hope for the intrigue and excitement of owning your VERY OWN roadside stand! I mean, the exhaust fumes, all the different cars ... we should all be so fortunate.

THE WOLF: Here's something that's been bugging me for a while, though. I couldn't quite remember if you were Spanish, Portugese, Columbian, or what. I noticed that you end all your promos with "picante". I headed over to Babelfish to try and figure out what you are trying to say. Take your last promo, for example. Here's what you said:

::CUEUP a segment of EL DIABLO's last promo. DIABLO is reclining on the couch. The audio fades in and we hear him say ...::

CASTILLO: ... the truth that I am just a little too much...¡¡¡PICANTE!!!

THE WOLF: Now let's see what I managed to come up with in the translation.

::CUEUP the same segment. CASTILLO's voice remains intact, but a badly dubbed, very midwestern voice replaces the word ¡¡¡PICANTE!!! with an alternate translation::

CASTILLO: ...the truth that I am just a little too much...¡¡¡SHARP!!!

THE WOLF: A little too much sharp? That can't be right, it just doesn't make sense.
That's okay though. I found a few alternate translations.

::CUEUP EL DIABLO's segment again::

CASTILLO: ...the truth that I am just a little too much...¡¡¡CHILI PEPPER!!!

THE WOLF: I guess that's not it either ...

::CUEUP the same segment::

CASTILLO: ...the truth that I am just a little too much...¡¡¡SPICED!!!

::THE WOLF strokes his chin, looking confused::

THE WOLF: I suppose I'm way off track, Castillo. I can't decide if you're trying to tell me that you're sharp, that you're some sort of pepper, or that you're spiced. I guess once we get into the ring, you can explain it to me. Show me the TRUE meaning of ¡¡¡PICANTE!!!

::FADE TO BLACK::

 

[TheOriginalSE]

Never Say Never Again...

((FADEIN: Edmunds is just arriving to the Toledo Sports Arena. He hops out of his car and goes to the trunk. After he pops it open he takes out his two bags. He then alarms the car and heads into the arena. FADEOUT.))

((FADEIN: Edmunds is now in his dressing room. He's got the bottom half of his attire on, but has not put on his Luger-esque top from Wrestlemania (oorp: which is by far my most favorite attire ever)..)) Edmunds stops whatever he was doing when he notices the GLCW cameracrew entering his lockerroom.))

EDMUNDS: "Jean, Jean.. I cannot even begin to try and understand what has entered your head. You have become almost incomprehensable. In fact, that right there has probably made me the most scared of stepping into the ring with you than anything you have said prior. The fact that you have somehow gained the ability to, instead of boring everyone to death, somehow make them baffled, speaks wonders. I don't know how you did it, Jean, but good job. Unfortunately, no matter how baffled you might make me now everything will clear before the house show. I've got a point to make in Toledo and I'm not going to bow down so my point can go unseen. You're thickedheadness has gotten the best of you, Jean, leading up to this house show. And I'm sure your thickheadedness will get the best of you during our match as well. You don't seem to understand change. You don't seem to understand anything you don't like. What are you going to do once the foundation that you have built yourself upon starts to crack? There's so much to say, Jean, and yet so little time left. We'll step into that ring in just a few moments before those people in Toledo and we'll let our talents speak for themselves. It's not that I do not enjoy engaging in these war of words with you, Jean, its just that it doesn't seem to get off the ground. You're too involved with what you dream about to even see the reality that is slowly heading towards your doorstep. Toledo will witness the beginning of the end of Jean Rabesque's stranglehold over Sean Edmunds. And while I eagerly await our first encounter in years, I look forward to an even bigger meeting. Sure, I'll enjoy making you look stupid in front of those few thousand.. (smirks) But in the end there's only one place that matters. I'll get my chance soon enough, Jean, and you'll, well you'll be scratching at the eyes of a world you cannot even begin to see."

((Edmunds finds his top and he quickly puts it on. He admires his outfit in the mirror making sure everything is where its supposed to be.))

EDMUNDS: "What once was lost is now found. And while you continue to tell yourself that for the past ten years I've fed myself lies in order to gain a sort of deity-like ego, you make your end become even more imminent. Keep calling me an idiot, Jean. If it will make you feel better after this house show, then continue doing it. Great Lakes Championship Wrestling is large enough for the both of us. It houses so many different talents and like yourself, talentless, that I do not even receive your insults. I learned a long time ago, Jean, not to take what people say to heart. If I did that then I'd be taking on hoards of imbociles who called me an idiot, or worthless, or crap. The satisfaction I get, and the satisfaction I'll get during this house show, is knowing that I go out there and prove to myself that I am better than anything anyone can throw at me. I've got a large mouth, Jean. I talk loads of (BLEEP) but I go out there and I back it up. There isn't much time left before I start making you eat the very words that escaped through your lips during your little vignettes here.. and there's no time for you to try to backtrack those remarks. Come Toledo all you'll be able to do is swallow each and every one of those words that came back to bite you in the ass. Whether I am naive or pompous, at least I will have the knowledge that I went out there and was able to help myself. I might be pompous, Jean.. I might have a high opinion of myself, but in the end, I prove myself right. I cannot, and will not, allow you to try to outdo me once more. I've sat back long enough and waited. I've taken time off to see where you'd go, and now I'm here, knocking on your door."

((Edmunds turns around to face the camera..))

EDMUNDS: "The good guy always wins, Jean? Is that how it goes? While I admire your merit and aspiration, I laugh at your childishness. There aren't any good or bad guys here. I'm not the bad guy and you're not the good guy. This isn't a movie.. although I heard that you were trying to get a reality television show of your own on Animal Planet. I do hope that pans out for you, Jean.. I think the idea of you talking to pets in an effort to help them out of their misery is a mighty fine idea. I just feel bad for those that have to suffer through your long pointless and utterly mind numbing monologues like everyone who watches you does. Do try to be fair, Jean, they're only animals. I will never beat you on television, Jean? That's a statement that you cannot even BEGIN to back up. There is nothing in the world that can stop me from toppling you from that high pedestal you have yourself on. And if you think I am going to fail then you will be sorely mistaken, both figuratively and literally. This taped fist match is going to be Hell. I know this, you know this. There's nothing we can do to avoid it, Jean. Once my fists are taped they know exactly what they need to do. There will be no holding back in the times of battle. I've come too far to leave disappointed.. I got a taste of you before, Jean, before I ended up leaving Jon Skieler in the lion's den.. and now I'm getting you all to myself. This is what I have dreamt about for years. And now that its slowly coming to fruition, I can hardly contain myself."

((Edmunds starts towards the camera.))

EDMUNDS: "You'll begin to see, Jean, starting in Toledo, that what you are stepping up to is not what you think. You seem to be lacking something, Jean. I don't know what it is, or whether you'll find it before we step into that ring, but its missing. Maybe its that mystique that I always saw you through.. I was always so enthralled by you that I made mistakes. But that haze is gone now, Jean. I see you as you are. Talentless. Mediocre. You're a step below me, Jean. A step behind me. And a step back. This match is so I can tie up loose ends. You say that you'll never lose to me on television, Jean? Well, after Toledo, I'll teach you "Never to Say Never Again".. because you're starting to come apart at the seems... and once you unravel, I will be standing over you.. until you finally are able to see through baby's eyes, that I am 'SIMPLY' (pauses) 'SENSATIONAL'."

((FADEOUT: As Edmunds stands there with a cocky smile left on his face. Fade to black.))

 

[Manson]

What Was Lost

((FADEIN: A grassy field somewhere in the Midwest. A small ditch takes up the center of the screen. TEMPEST crawls on his hands and feet sniffing his way toward the ditch. Michael Manson is following with a duffle bag and a shovel.))

MANSON: He there?

TEMPEST(licking and tasting a few blades of grass): Indeed.

MANSON: Well, go and check.

((Manson kicks Tempest into the ditch and leans on the shovel.))

MANSON: It has occured to me that it being a tag match, I might need a tag partner for something or other, a human shield can be nice. Luckily, Pandorians have the tracking skills of a bloodhound and I took a mask and had Tempest lead right to where I feared the Masked Blazer was, abandoned in a ditch somewhere.

How's it going down there?

TEMPEST(rolling in filth): Just a few more moments.

MANSON: Well then, as the fully acknowledged foe trying to take things up to supervllain like devilry, I'll have to go on about my innate superiority to my opponents. Yeah, Golem, I felt the claw and it wasn't any different than any other submission move in the world. It's easily forgotten, unlike how you easily forget that I took dropped you on your neck and pinned you for the ground so decisively that a human being who wishes me dead counted it. Rationalize your way out of being a failure. You win a match by dq and expect everyone to bow at your feet? I didn't do anything different than I normally do. Hell, the title match, I did behave abnormally since I didn't cheat in any way. But remember one thing, Golem, in movies the monster doesn't win. In real life, he does all the time. Except Golem, you're not the monster. Wearing green fur makes you a freak, but far from a monster. But maybe some burnt tissue can help you out in that regard.

As for Maelstrom, I never picked up on the whole M&M thing before. Though I suppose it's all right as long as it's not the rapper. And I told you about Charles Manson before, I know nothing about him other than he had a cult, cut a swatstika into his forehead, and liked the Beatles and Spice Girls. At least, Manson is a real name. But accroding to my friend Tempest here, apparently Maelstrom might be one of those clever tribal names. But next time you try to parody someone, make sure it's funny.

((Tempest tries to climb up the ditch and stumbles. He tries again and falls on his ass. Manson waves him off and steps in. Off camera, a body is laying.))

Well, it's the Masked Blazer all right. Maybe Poe killed him. Anyway.

((Manson reaches into the duffle bag and pulls out a white gown.))

TEMPEST: Isn't that the Vulcan resurrection gown from Star Trek III: The Search for Spock?

MANSON: Sure is, I bought it off Ebay. Golem touched it once, so it's sure to have semi-metaphysical properties. Put it on the corpse.

TEMPEST: Why do I?

MANSON: Because you're the manly Pandorian and you're too short to handle the shovel.

((Tempest sighs and starts dressing the corpse off screen as Manson waits impatiently. He starts throwing dirt while Tempest is in the middle of his work. Finally, the littlelest Pandorian runs away as Manson buries the Masked Blazer.))

TEMPEST: Now?

MANSON: All right.

((Tempest takes out 3 cigars and in a manly, butch way places all 3 in his place and lights them.))

TEMPEST: On the island, we called this flavor country.

((Time passes as Manson goes to sleep on the ground and Tempest smokes down all 3 cigars, yet not in a presidential way. Finally, the ground stirs and Manson gets up. The grave moves and ..the corspse begins to raise..))

TEMPEST(rolling back sleeves): I'll handle this fer yer.

((The Masked Blazer raises from his grave in a Vulcan resurrection ceremonial gown, his feared mask.....and 1/8 of his original size. Manson pushes Tempest aside.))

MANSON: There you are. We have things to do.

((The Masked Blazer motions for a cigar.))

MANSON: yeah, yeah, later on.

((The Masked Blazer climbs onto Manson's shoulders and they walk off with Tempest into the rising sun, as Tempest used to do every morning on the island to show how much of a man he was.))