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THE HOSS REPORT for Revolution 12/17/03


League Member
Jan 1, 2000
Niagara, ON, Canada
The Hoss Report

Greetings from beneath the beat-up old Oakland A's cap, and welcome to another edition of the Hoss Report! As usual, I'm Jim Hosselhoff here with my thoughts. Revolution hit the airwaves early yesterday, but I understand the networks have lost Onslaught in the shuffle, thus necessitating that we re-send the tape to them. Whatever happened to efficiency, huh?

Ah well. Time for the Report.


More words of praise for GXW's production team. Ever since Global Warfare, the product has looked absolutely great - it's cleaner than ever and looks incredibly professional. Kudos to J'Bu and the other boys in the truck.

Why is it that Ice Tre makes me laugh every time I see him? I've watched a few of his indy matches, and I must say he's an interesting character to say the least. I can't say I see him achieving huge superstardom, but I will say he's a hoss of a different breed.

So Rocko Daymon's back, huh? I like it. I like it a lot. I watched a lot of SCW during its latter days, and through all of that Rocko stood out as a huge hoss with a big heart. Mark my words: Now that Rocko's back, he's going to start kicking ass, taking names, and winning titles.

Oh, please. The man formerly known as Clapper is indeed a hoss, but really - the God Of Xtreme? How cheesy can a person possibly get? As far as I'm concerned, Clapper's just begging for someone to knock him off his soapbox - the only question is, who's a big enough hoss to take on this maniac?

It's great to see Hellfighter stepping up his game. His victory over Vicious and Delicious shows me that he's putting his heart into his matches and finally beginning to realize his potential. Hellfighter's a big hoss, and I think once he realizes the talent he has, he's going to go places.

You know, I think Trynyty Wang's entrance was just ridiculously long. The song "Points of Authority" runs for four minutes, and she played the whole thing. That's ridiculous. I could fit a short match or a promo into four minutes. Either way, the ladies put on a great performance, and Jennifer Rowe is definitely making an impact.

Spin the Wheel, Make a Deal, huh? This could be interesting. I for one am fond of the old X-treme Title, but I do think that replacing it with the STW/MAD Title could be a fresh air to GXW's large midcard. There are a lot of hosses who could benefit from holding such a title.

David Allen Black continues to prove that he is indeed a hoss. His victory over Reuben Fasco puts him in an excellent position. Fasco's a hoss too, but I think he needs to calm down a little and put more thought into the message behind his promos rather than the scenery. I mean, staging a gang-rape in a promo? It took all the charm I could muster to keep the PTC from invading Revolution and lynching the Bruiser in the middle of the ring after that one.

I am so proud of Adam Benjamin right now. His outing against Dan Ryan proved to me and to everyone else I've spoken to that he's more than ready to take a big step forward in GXW. Benjamin's going to be a huge hoss someday, mark my words. Ryan is, of course, a MONSTER hoss, and it's always a privilege to have him back with us here in GXW.

I'd like to take a moment to wish a fond get-well-soon to Terry Anderson. He's raised a hell of a hoss in Stephen Waltz, and he should be proud of his protege for taking DreamMaker to the limit.

Call me crazy, but I think Christian Sands is NOT the man to be teaching the Xtreme Enough contestants wrestling. He's a hoss, sure, but his in-ring work tends to be somewhat too stiff. Mark my words: He'll be a bad influence on those kids. Last thing we need is for more young wrestlers to grow up into psycho-stiff hosses.

It seems that there's quite a bit of hostility brewing between the Monsta Boyz and the Dark Carnival, as suggested by the inconclusive nature of their match. Both teams are comprised of great hosses, and the eventual rematch between them should be a sight to see. Perhaps then we'll see a clear winner and determine which team really WILL be somebody.

I never want to see Boogie Smallz in a towel again.

In any case, the triple threat main event was an excellent contest despite maintaining the status quo. All three competitors were huge hosses, but as far as I'm concerned, triple-threats are never fully conclusive. What I'd REALLY like to see is a series of those three men facing each other in singles matches to determine who's REALLY the best. Either way, kudos to John Miller and Boogie Smallz for retaining their titles.

It's prediction time.


The mingling of GXW talent and outsiders in this tournament promises to offer some phenomenal matches.

I'll probably get some odd looks for saying this, but man, is Lindsay Troy ever the perfect combination of looks and talent. From what I've seen she can hang with any hoss out there. I think the returning Cameron Cruise will have his hands full with her. Not literally, of course.

I'm definitely looking forward to the match between Christian Sands and Rob Sampson. Both men are HUGE hosses. Sampson's got a lot of momentum after defeating Eric Davis, and although Sands didn't pick up a win at Revolution, he impressed a lot of people backstage with his performance. This one could go either way.

I'm not all that familiar with Billy Starr, but I'm told he's a big hoss. I'm not sure if Reuben Fasco knows what he's getting into here, but if he can focus on the match a bit more, he could pull out the upset.

Benjamin vs. Daymon promises to be a great match. As I've said before, Benjamin's a hoss - and even though he didn't win at Revolution, he impressed everyone in the locker room by nearly beating the Ego Buster on a number of occasions. I'm suspecting that Benjamin will pull out the victory and keep his momentum rolling.

Speaking of the Ego Buster, he may be facing another upset this week, as he's going head-to-head with promising youngster Stephen Waltz. As I've said before, Waltz is proving himself to be a big hoss, and I wouldn't be surprised if he gave Ryan a run for his money.

Hellfighter's been getting his game together lately, but I'm not sure how he'll fare against a hoss like Clapper. The self-styled God of Xtreme has been on a hot streak lately, and I don't foresee it stopping any time soon.

Definitely looking forward to the match between Boogie Smallz and Eric Davis. Both of these men are hosses, but I'm thinking that Boogie could pull out the win here. The Continental Champion's been on a tear in GXW lately. However, Davis could just as easily surprise him if Boogie's not careful.

It's a pleasure to see Max Blackshire back in the ring. He's a hoss of high repute. Troy Douglas is also a big hoss, but I'm certain that Max is going to give him a run for his money.

Yes, David Black has got some momentum behind him after defeating Reuben Fasco. However, I don't think Randy Cobb's going to let himself go down that easily. Cobb's a top-notch hoss, and I suspect that he's going to pull out the win over Mr. Black and move on in the tournament.

The match between Kin Hiroshi and DreamMaker has me intrigued. Both men are hosses, but their styles clash dramatically - Hiroshi the high-flyer, DreamMaker the powerhouse. It should be very interesting to see how these two adapt to each other's style. This match is either going to be great, or it's going to be plodding, depending on how well their styles mesh.

Who do I think is going to win it all? Hm... Tough call. So many hosses! However, if I had to pick names, I'd bet on Boogie Smallz, Dan Ryan, or Rob Sampson to pick up the tournament win and face Miller at Battleground Britain. But that's just my opinion. I could be wrong.

Well, that's it for the Hoss Report. See you next time, and keep on truckin'!

~Jim Hosselhoff


Jan 1, 2000
upstate NY
let it be known:

i love the Hoss Report.

as someone who's written many an article in the same type of vein i can honestly say that the two installments of yours that i've seen have been quality. keep 'em comin'.


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