The Fresh New Real Life Pro Wrestling Thread

[SenorJames]

Also, I've been on a HUGE Big Japan kick, and now I'm thinking we need to do another King of the Deathmatch tournament in DEFIANCE. Where's DEFIANCE's Jun Kasai?

Tyrone Walker won the very first one in the NeWA.

 

[The God-Beast]

Yeah, but is Ty a crazy fuck who gets powerbombed on razor boards for shits and giggles?

(That razor board deathmatch from 2005 may be the most absolutely apeshit thing I've ever seen.)

 

[SenorJames]

Yeah, but is Ty a crazy fuck who gets powerbombed on razor boards for shits and giggles?

(That razor board deathmatch from 2005 may be the most absolutely apeshit thing I've ever seen.)

Ty DGAF.

 

[Greer]

Ty DGAF.

I'm.... in?

 

[The God-Beast]

Hey, remember in April when it looked like the winds of change were blowing, and Cesaro was going to be the next big thing, and the idea of him getting eliminated by HEATH FUCKING SLATER wouldn't have ever crossed our minds?

How about the Wyatt family getting jobbed non-stop to the Usos and part-timer Jericho going over Bray clean as a sheet?

At this point I can't wait for Cena to beat Brock at Summerslam and make everyone say "fuck it, I'm done with the Network" once their six-month committment runs out.

And this is why I go miles out of my way to make sure Vince and co. never get a dime from me.

 

[SenorJames]

Hey, remember in April when it looked like the winds of change were blowing, and Cesaro was going to be the next big thing, and the idea of him getting eliminated by HEATH FUCKING SLATER wouldn't have ever crossed our minds?

How about the Wyatt family getting jobbed non-stop to the Usos and part-timer Jericho going over Bray clean as a sheet?

At this point I can't wait for Cena to beat Brock at Summerslam and make everyone say "fuck it, I'm done with the Network" once their six-month committment runs out.

And this is why I go miles out of my way to make sure Vince and co. never get a dime from me.

Yeah their logic with Cesaro is that they want to slow him down so they can focus on Reigns and then when Reigns is established, they'll focus on Cesaro. Stupid fucking #WWElogic strikes all the goddamn time.

 

[Evan H.]

Gotta' say though, bright side... Paige's heel turn was fuckin' awesome, Woods/Kofi/Big E stable looks dope.


But Heyman's promo last night was the sickest thing I've heard in years. Honestly, top five promos I've ever laid ears on.

I hope WWE realizes Heyman in the course of about five minutes completely sold SummerSlam for them.

 

[Evan H.]

Bam.

 

[The God-Beast]

Plan C(ena wins anyway lol).

 

[Justin]

Anybody who didn't expect Cena to win is an idiot.

Lesnar will win at SummerSlam, and Reigns will take it from him at Mania.

 

[The God-Beast]

Oh, I was talking about SummerSlam. It's the last PPV of the six-month period the Network early adopters committed to, so they really need to have a compelling show or risk losing a good chunk of those subscribers. Which is exactly why I expect a "JOHN CENA OVERCOMES THE ODDS~!" ending all over again.

Man.. I don't know. I'm starting to feel like wrestling has passed me by and that the product these days just isn't for me.

 

[Justin]

I think you're over-thinking it.

As a matter of fact, I think most people like us over-think it.

We are all just "smart" enough to the business to know what we think would work, or what we think would be best for business, when collectively we've never put one ass in one seat or drawed one dime. Maybe we're all right, and the people who have been in the business literally their entire lives are all idiots who don't know what the fuck they're doing, but I doubt it.

Sure, it's not the glory days anymore, but think about the glory days, I was six for Hogan/Andre, eight for Hogan/Warrior. I thought it was all real. Even the Attitude Era, I was in high school, I was beyond thinking it was real, but I still had no clue. Now I'm a jaded 20 year eWrestling veteran who thinks he can book a show (and I learned how to book from Raven and Jim Cornette shoot videos) and knows what he's talking about, but in the end, I'm just a mark.

Wrestling is what it is, your perception is what has changed, not the business. Hulk Hogan couldn't work for shit, but I loved him, you loved him, everybody on the planet loved him. We want more now because we're more sophisticated, but we can't always get what we want.

But if you try sometimes... (to enjoy it for what it's worth)

You get what you need. (Some entertainment from a fake sport.)

 

[The God-Beast]

You're not the first one who's said I'm overthinking it. One of the others who did suggested I change the way I look at it, like, the perspective (the guy who gave me the password for his WWE Network account for my birthday that I never use!), but he also brought to mind how I've... pretty lost enjoyment of a lot of things (Comics, in between New 52 and the fact that I STILL hold a grudge over One More Day, as an example, but that's another topic...).

I'm going to an indie show with a few of my friends on Saturday. Low Ki and Daniels in the main, and much, if not all, of the roster are home-grown Delaware kids. I don't know how that'll change my perspective, but it's one of those actual family-friendly shows, so I'm looking forward to channeling the spirits of every 85-year-old Tennessee grandmother who wanted to jump in the ring and beat the shit out of whoever was getting the best of Lawler back then, without being vulgar.

 

[SenorJames]

Oh, I was talking about SummerSlam. It's the last PPV of the six-month period the Network early adopters committed to, so they really need to have a compelling show or risk losing a good chunk of those subscribers. Which is exactly why I expect a "JOHN CENA OVERCOMES THE ODDS~!" ending all over again.

Man.. I don't know. I'm starting to feel like wrestling has passed me by and that the product these days just isn't for me.

This is why DEFIANCE is a thing that exists and is happening... We can do it moar bettar!

 

[SenorJames]

You're not the first one who's said I'm overthinking it. One of the others who did suggested I change the way I look at it, like, the perspective (the guy who gave me the password for his WWE Network account for my birthday that I never use!), but he also brought to mind how I've... pretty lost enjoyment of a lot of things (Comics, in between New 52 and the fact that I STILL hold a grudge over One More Day, as an example, but that's another topic...).

I'm going to an indie show with a few of my friends on Saturday. Low Ki and Daniels in the main, and much, if not all, of the roster are home-grown Delaware kids. I don't know how that'll change my perspective, but it's one of those actual family-friendly shows, so I'm looking forward to channeling the spirits of every 85-year-old Tennessee grandmother who wanted to jump in the ring and beat the shit out of whoever was getting the best of Lawler back then, without being vulgar.

Honestly.

I watch WWE for the few of them that I want to watch and enjoy the little bits that I can get out of it.

If I want better wrestling without so much of the garbage getting in the way, I look elsewhere and enjoy that for what it offers me.

 

[The God-Beast]

Yeah, but both my wife and I have full-time jobs, and I have a three-year-old daughter. I can't speak for Justin since he's in a similar boat, but in between work, handling things around the house when my wife's at work, social committments, and being a dad, that doesn't leave me with a lot of free time, so I can't just go on a search for Japan stuff or even buy the iPPVs for NJPW (though I'd love to).

The one thing that would make me consider the Network is if they started showing videos for stuff they DIDN'T own, like Japan or the indies. Because I can't go fishing around for every NJPW show or NWA: Southwest Bumblefuck card for future stars, y'know?

 

[Justin]

I love the Network for the library. I constantly watch old WCCW, ECW, and WCW stuff. Also I can then watch an HD PPV at my leisure on Sundays. As for "other" I download it off XWT and watch it when I go to bed.

 

[Bad Mofo]

Anybody who didn't expect Cena to win is an idiot.

Lesnar will win at SummerSlam, and Reigns will take it from him at Mania.

I hope they do it that way, but something in the bottom of my heart tells me that they won't. They'll have Lesnar lose the strap somewhere between here and there. I hope they give it to him, let him keep it all the way and get some legitimate heat back on the strap and for challengers. Maybe have Cena have a few at two PPVs, get "injured". Then in a dream world, the one where I live in, DB, Punk, and Cena will return at the Rumble and will be the last three - but that won't happen.

 

[SenorJames]

I hope they do it that way, but something in the bottom of my heart tells me that they won't. They'll have Lesnar lose the strap somewhere between here and there. I hope they give it to him, let him keep it all the way and get some legitimate heat back on the strap and for challengers. Maybe have Cena have a few at two PPVs, get "injured". Then in a dream world, the one where I live in, DB, Punk, and Cena will return at the Rumble and will be the last three - but that won't happen.

Nope.

Reigns will win the Rumble and I wouldn't be surprised if they had him break his own record that he set in this years Rumble for most eliminations.

Then Reigns will go to WrestleMania and beat Lesnar for the belt.

 

[Evan H.]

Anybody who didn't expect Cena to win is an idiot.

Lesnar will win at SummerSlam, and Reigns will take it from him at Mania.

This. And I'm fine with this. Reigns is great, Lesnar is great. Cena against Lesnar is great.

Furthermore, Paige versus AJ will be great. Jericho and Wyatt will end up being great. Rollins and Ambrose have been REALLY great.

Like I keep saying to people, if you expect everything WWE does to be "up your ally" and just tickle you pink every week for like the nine hours of original programming they produce weekly... well, you're an asshole. Sorry, but you are. On any given three hour Raw there's like a good forty percent of the show that's really great wrestling television every single week. Do I wish it was a better ratio? Sure. Do I wish there was less garbage to slog through? Yeah, obviously.

But do I want to be a bitter fuck and constantly bitch and whine and piss all over the only major weekly wrestling product in existance? No. I like wrestling. I watch Main Event, NXT, a good amount of Raw... that amounts to several hours of top notch wrestling TV every week I thoroughly enjoy.

SummerSlam is going to be a pretty kick ass show, and WWE is offering that show for $9.99... I'm sorry, not a lot to bitch at right there IMO.