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Sorry You're Not a Winner Entries

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fugginVOSS

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If you would like to challenge for the Intergalactic Championship you need to reply in this roleplay thread in character, (500 word limit - 1 reply per person) about why you want to be the Intergalactic Champion. Sign ups end on October 18th, 2012.

I will choose the people, from the responses in this thread, as to who will go into which of the first two matches on the card.

At Sorry You're Not a Winner there will be THREE matches.

Match 1:
Intergalactic Championship Qualification match for V for Victoralicious
If you win this match you will go on to face the Intergalactic Champion at the next event, V for Victoralicious.

Match 2:
Intergalactic Championship Qualification match for the Main Event.
If you win this match you will face Phil Atken, the CURRENT Intergalactic Champion, in the Main Event of Sorry You're Not a Winner.

RP Deadline: October 18th, 2012, Midnight LA Timezone
RP Limits: 1 RP per entering wrestler, 500 words

ALL ENTRY RPs GO HERE!

 

brusch

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(The camera opens to a dejected Leyenda de Ocho, in his full Legend of Zelda ring gear, sitting on a locker room bench with a white towel over his shoulders. His head is down as he begins to speak.)

Ocho: "So close. I was SO. CLOSE...

...and for a long time in that title match, I thought it was my night. I pinned Sabre - then, I pinned Troy Matthews. Everything was going my way...then, I don't know. I don't know what happened, I...

...I just didn't have enough left."

(Ocho raises his face to the camera; though masked, it appears as if his eyes are welling up.)

Ocho: "Phil, I'm not saying you didn't earn it - you did. You made me tap, and I'm going to have to live with the fact that in front of thousands of fans in the ring and millions of people watching around the world, I lost. I get that.

But I need another chance. I have to have it...because I think you and I both know that it could've gone either way in that ring. We were evenly matched throughout the WHOLE damn match. If I caught you with a second Actualizar off the top rope, it would've been finished.

Pain GRILLE said it himself, didn't he? We need to wrestle again. For the fans...for the title...

...for myself.

So what do you say, huh? Give a kid another shot. You saw what I did in that ring - and you know I'm capable of even more. Let's put on that show. Let's settle this once and for all. Let's put this title on the map forever, and ensure that ANYONE who steps into the ring for that title has to go through Ganon himself if they ever hope to be the champion.

...please."

(Ocho stands up and quickly walks away from the camera as it fades to black.)
 

Mad Dog

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(FADEIN to a figure standing in front of what appears to be a star field in the background. The man is wearing a pale green mask that resembles the typical eyewitness accounts of what an alien looks like, with large eyes and antennas sticking out of the top. The figure begins to speak in a voice that sounds odd and not of this world.)

Greetings Earthlings. My name is Xoesh the Zith…Champion of Saedomoe. I come from a galaxy beyond your solar system. I received a message beamed from your planet that I found intriguing. The message contained video of a recent event to crown a new Intergalactic champion. How can you have such an event without proper representation from the planet Saedomoe, or as your astrologists refer to as HIP 13259. This is a travesty and we will not sit quietly so that a mere human can hold the distinction of being the Intergalactic champion!

At first we came in peace, hoping to trade with your feeble planet that is vastly lacking in resources. Our technology can help Earth and can expand life on your planet for eons beyond the timetable presented to you by the Mayans. But since we were left out of your battle to crown a champion, the peace talks will not happen. We are insulted by your pompous actions and now declare war on IGC.

One man in particular, we can not wait to probe and examine to determine how this representation of your species overcame insurmountable odds to capture the distinction of being the champion of the galaxy. This individual, Phil Atken, has brought shame to the cosmos and must face me, the Grand Champion of Saedomoe, to determine who the greater species among the universe truly is.

Phil Atken, our planet is superior to yours. Our technology surpasses anything your earth has created. We are the greater beings and will prove our supremacy inside the box with ropes that you inferior humans call a ring. This does not compute with our research, as a ring is round and yours is in the shape of a square. Nonetheless, we will not wipe out life on your planet just yet. We have much to learn from your kind before it is totally obliterated.

Our first conquest is to bring the IGC title where it belongs…to the true ruler of the macrocosm, Saedomoe. This event will be one of cataclysmic proportions beyond anything your orb known as Earth has ever witnessed.

All hail Oxuzi!

(FADE TO BLACK)
 

Ford

UTA Hall of Famer and All-Around Nice Guy
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(MULTIPLE BURSTS OF STATIC INTERLACED: with JACK HARMEN, standing in front of an IGC flag, wearing his Superfly Express t-shirt.)

(CUTTO: Extreme low angle on Jack Harmen. His head is hunched over and he looks almost emotionless. He opens his mouth. Speechless, for only a moment.)

JACK HARMEN: I was SO close.

(Harmen shakes his head from side to side.)

JACK HARMEN: I outlasted 124 in the Ultratitle just to come up short against ELI FLAIR?!

(CUTTO:Close up, as Harmen grabs the camera and shakes it.)

JACK HARMEN: I LOST the ULTRATITLE! I may never see it AGAIN.

(Harmensteadies the camera, and pulls it closer.)

JACK HARMEN: So I will take ANYTHING... and EVERYTHING I can.

(Harmenlets go of the camera as the cameraman backs up.)

JACK HARMEN: And it starts with the MULTIVERSE. Becoming a king AMONGST UNIVERSES, a title WORTHY to be a companion of the ULTRATITLE.

(Harmen smiles.)

JACK HARMEN: The Inter-Galactic Championship... Nice ring to it. So while I was not able to become Ultra-Flyer, perhaps, I can become GOD of the STARS.

(Harmen backs off, pacing.)

JACK HARMEN: Competing in the Ultratitle disqualified me from wrestling for the IGC title. NOW? Phil Atken is a DEAD MAN!

(Harmen stops pacing, and looks directly into the camera.)

JACK HARMEN: Listen, Phil. Nothing personal. You and I go way back. The IWO was a legacy that is forever lasting and you left your mark there. You had more success in Action! than I could have DREAMED of.But I want you to be prepared.

(Harmen storms to the camera.)

JACK HARMEN: Prepare for the end! Cause I will breath fire! I will STOMP cities like Godzilla, I will TEAR your LYRNYX out with my TEETH!

(Harmen relaxes.)

JACK HARMEN: If it means...

(Flyer looks off, day dreaming.)

JACK HARMEN: … I get to be called the Inter-Galactic Champion.

(Harmen smirks.)

JACK HARMEN: And to Xeosh, know that I am the Flyer, the savior and destroyer of worlds, a master of Space and Time. Cross me? And I'll make sure you were never BORN.

(Jack Harmen walks off, lighting up a cigarette as he does.)

JACK HARMEN: You've been warned.

(FADEOUT.)
 
Last edited:

RStrawsma

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Destruction Has Come...

(CUE UP: “Am I Evil?” by Diamond Head.)


(We’re looking at nothing as the music is building... until we hear heavy breathing that sounds almost like the snarl of a starved Kodiak bear that just burst into a cabin full of tasty schoolchildren.)

(Then as soon as the riff comes in, our shot opens up on... this guy.)


Dimmu+Borgir+shagrath.jpg


(He immediately assaults our eardrums by shouting at the camera at the top of his lungs.)

Magnus Destructo
COWER, YOU MAGGOTS... FOR THE HARBINGER OF DOOM AND DESTRUCTION HAS RETURNED!!

I AM MAGNUS DESTRUCTO!!

THE REAL MAGNUS DESTRUCTO!! NOT THAT LARD-ASS IMPOSTER THEY GOT JOBBING OVER IN NEW FRONTIER!!

I AM THE BARON OF BRUTALITY!!

THE DREADED DEVOURER!!

THE KING OF ALL MONSTERS!!

THE FEARSOME BEAST THAT WAS ONCE KNOWN TO HAVE CONSUMED THE GOLDEN CHILD NAMED IMPULSE IN A BLOODY FEAST OF GORE AND CARNAGE AT “EYE FOR AN EYE” TOO-KAY-EHKS!!

AND OF COURSE... THE UNDEFEATED INAUGURAL ENNH-EHLL-DUBBLE-YOO WORLD OPEN-WEIGHT ABSOLUTE CHAMPION!!

(He holds up what appears to be a large gilded girdle.)

Magnus Destructo
BUT EVEN NEW YORK CITY WAS TOO SMALL TO IMPRISON THE MOST BLOOD-THIRSTY ANIMAL TO EVER LAY WASTE IN THE RING!! I DIDN’T JUST TAKE A BITE OF THE BIG APPLE... I DIDN’T JUST EAT IT, EITHER!!

NO... I TOOK THAT APPLE, AND SHOVED IT INTO A PIG’S MOUTH!! THEN I IMPALED THAT PIG WITH A BARBED CARPATHIAN WAR-SPEAR, AND ROASTED IT OVER THE FUNERAL PYRE OF SO MANY FOOLS THAT DARED TO STAND IN THE PATH OF MAGNUS DESTRUCTO!!

THEN I ATE THAT PIG WHOLE... WITH THE BIG, STUPID APPLE STILL STUFFED ITS MOUTH!! AND WHEN IT CAME OUT THE OTHER END, IT WAS JUST SHIT, PIG MEAT, AND APPLESAUCE!!

(He sneers over the belt... suddenly seeing it as something unworthy. He hocks up some snot and spits a loogey on the face of the belt, before tossing it somewhere off camera with a loud roar.)

Magnus Destructo
BRRAAAARRGHHH!!

THAT’S WHAT I THINK OF NEXT LEVEL WRESTLING!! IT WAS JUST AN APPETIZER TO THE MAIN COURSE!!

THE DREADED DEVOURER HAS NO USE IN RULING OVER AN ENTIRE CITY!! EVEN THIS ENTIRE PATHETIC WORLD IS TOO SMALL FOR MY ALL-ENCOMPASSING POWER!!

NO... MY HUNGER WILL NOT BE FED UNTIL MAGNUS DESTRUCTO RULES THIS ENTIRE UNIVERSE!! MWA-HA-HA-HA-HAWW!!

(He points a finger to the camera, his wild eyes glowing with evil and malice.)

Magnus Destructo
AND FOR THIS REASON, THE BARON OF BRUTALITY HAS COME TO INTERGALACTIC CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING!!

I OPENLY CALL FOR THE GREATEST WARRIORS IN THE UNIVERSE TO CRAWL OUT OF THEIR MOTHERS’ VAGINAS AND GET THEIR WEAK ASSES IN THE RING... WHEREUPON THE KING OF ALL MONSTERS WILL SLAUGHTER THEM LIKE SWOLLEN BOVINE THROWN THROUGH WOODCHIPPERS!! IT MATTERS NOT IF YOU ARE BRAVE... COWARDLY... STRONG... WEAK... THE DREADED DEVOURER WILL INEVITABLY CONSUME ALL OF EXISTENCE!!

I DON’T GIVE A FUCK WHO THIS PHIL ATKEN GUY IS... BUT IF HE HAS ANY BRAINS, HE WILL TAKE THAT BELT OF HIS AND SHIP IT ON OVER TO THE KEEP OF ETERNAL DARKNESS, CARPATHIAN MOUNTAINS COUNTY, NEW JERSEY, UNLESS HE WANTS ME TO RIP HIS GODDAMN SPINE OUT OF HIS ASSHOLE!!

FUCK THE ATKEN’S DIET!! I LIVE OFF OF NOTHING BUT CLOVEN-HOOFED LIVESTOCK AND MANFLESH, AND LOOK AT ME!! I’M A GODDAMN SEXUAL EATER OF GODDAMN SEXUAL TYRANNOSAURUSES!!

(At some point, a production assistant slips into the frame to whisper something into Destructo’s ear. The Baron of Brutality reacts by grabbing the poor guy by the collar of his shirt and pulls him within inches of his face.)

Magnus Destructo
WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN I HAVE A FIVE-HUNDRED WORD LIMIT!?! YOU CAN’T PUT A LIMIT ON THE UNSTOPPABLE FORCE OF FURY THAT IS MAGNUS DESTRUCTO!!

GGRRRRRAAAAAAGGHHH!!!

(Roaring like a banshee, Destructo heaves the production assistant out of the shot with a Gorilla Press. We can hear him crashing violently off camera. Magnus, meanwhile, lunges at the camera and yanks it savagely off the tripod. His ferocious and horrific sneer fills the entire shot.)

Magnus Destructo
I’M COMING FOR YOU, PHIL ATKEN!! I’M COMING TO RIP YOUR FACE OFF, AND USE IT TO WIPE THE APPLESAUCE OUT OF MY ASS!!

BRACE YOURSELF, INTERGALACTIC CHAMPIONSHIP... FOR DESTRUCTION HAS COME TO THE COSMOS!!

(The shot whizzes by in a blur as Destructo hurls the camera across the set with an animalistic roar. As it hits the floor, the shot cuts to static.)
 

Chris Eagles

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Re: Destruction Has Come...

We appear to be backstage at an wrestling venue, when off camera the sound of steel hitting something is heard. The camera reveals that a steel chair was indeed thrown against a wall.

???: Fu*k this. I'm stuck of the bullshit. Randy, what the fu*k has happened to this place?

The Cancer of TWOstars, Christopher Ryan Eagles walks into shot, shouting to his stable-mate who it seems is farther down the hallway.

CRE: Since that muppet Arron Winter returned this place has down hill, you know I blame him for my poor showing in the Ultratitle tournament. He set me up to fail in that, and then we have my attempt to get in the fatal-four way for the Inter-Galactic Championship. That useful tw*t books me in a meaningless match the night before, I'm sure he doesn't want me to finally win a big title.

The camera is unable to hear the reply, but Eagles seems to just hear him.

CRE: No I haven't seen Brice yet. Why?

Randy Roko walks up to his rival turned friend.

RR: He's signed you up for another chance at bringing the Inter-Galactic title to TWOstars, and more importantly Re-Evolution.
 

J The Ripper

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Re: Destruction Has Come...

Sylo looked over at his bag as the light from his cell phone fought its way through the fabric of the bag. Sylo snarled a bit, frustrated because he was focused on the Backbone, and wanting to know what now. He plucked the phone from the bag and his interest was piqued as the caller said “Unknown”. Sylo answered and listened.

“Wait, how am I supposed to enter another tournament with everything going on?” Sylo sighed rubbing the bridge of his nose as Aria Murphy put a hand on his shoulder. Sylo held up one finger and listened to the other end.

“What do you mean represent jOlt? I represent jOlt as their champion every time I step through the curtain. What’s this title supposed to mean?” Sylo stopped again listening and for the first time he chuckled.

“So it just means I’m the champion of champions or what? Don’t get me wrong, it’s an interesting idea in general but how will it affect me in jOlt?” Sylo stopped again listening and scoffed. “What do I have left to prove? Ten years of destruction and you want me to represent jOlt because you can’t? I’ll think on it.” Sylo didn’t wait for an answer as he hit end and put the phone away.

“What was that all about?” Aria asked looking at her fiancée.

“There’s this Intergalactic tournament to win some belt and an anonymous source wants me to be one of the people that represents jOlt. They say it won’t affect me in jOlt but who the hell knows what’s going on. What do you think?” Sylo turned to Aria inside their shared locker room.

“I think if jOlt is okay with it you should do it. You’re the SuperBeast, you’re the last Legacy champion, and you’re THE jOlt champion. Who better to represent the company? You could bring something back to this place that no one else even thought to do. You could put more eyes on jOlt than anyone expected. So why not?” Aria smiled up at Sylo putting a hand on his cheek and smiling. Sylo sat down and went into a quiet contemplation as he thought about it.

For a while now he had wondered how much he had left to prove or what was left for him to do. He felt like he had his chance snatched away in the Ultratitle tournament and maybe, just maybe, this was a chance to redeem that loss. He was the jOlt champion, for now, so wouldn’t it be his job to represent jOlt. Ten years of Destruction and he had to think about joining a tournament.

Maybe he should do it. Maybe this was the missing piece in his career he’d needed. Maybe this tournament wasn’t for the glory of jOlt but for the glory of Legacy of Champions or maybe it was more so for the legacy of The SuperBeast.

Sylo looked up at Aria for a moment, stretched, and stood back up. He held his fiancée’s face in one hand, searching her eyes, and it was clear she believed in him. Sylo sighed once more and looked at Aria.

“Okay, I’ll do it.”

And with that Aria smiled and Sylo made the call.
 

North!

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Re: Destruction Has Come...

The backstage of an arena could by seen via a shaky handheld camera as current jOlt Wrestling Relentless Champion stepped into view with his Relentless Championship draped over his shoulder.

“It has come to my attention that there is a championship recognized by several different organizations and they haven’t reached out to Aran Thompson?! The Relentless Champion?! Mr. Relentless?!”

Aran adjusted the Relentless Championship on his shoulder.

“Are you kidding me? I break records, I make history, I singlehandedly took out the internet wrestling community of ewrestler.net and you can’t even call the phone? Email? Text? Snail mail?!”

Aran looked to his side as he heard a couple of ring crew members audible announce that Sylo had signed up for the Intergalactic Championship and he turned his head to the side and focused on the camera.

“Don’t think that is going to stop me. I’ve dreamed of the day I got a chance to go toe to toe with the Superbeast. I’ve stepped in against the mysterious wanderer, I’ve stepped in against Mr. One Letter Better. All I do is excel.”

“Honey, don’t forget about High Flya’ Jack Harmen.” A female voice interrupted Aran who refocused his attention the person behind the camera who was obviously a female.

“High Flyer, Sylo, Vince Jacobs, or anybody else. I don’t care. I’ll step into the ring proudly and take who ever I face too the distance. Be it the air, or the mat. I am technically and proficiently sound to take on anybody you put at me.”

“I am the jOlt Reletless Champion. The future of the industry and the very man who is officially, putting his name on the ballot.”

Aran grabbed the Relentless Championship and raised it near his head.

“Aran Thompson will evolve from Mr. Relentless to Mr. Intergalactic.”

The camera froze with an image of Aran holding his Relentless Championship in the air.
 
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