Mount Rainier Title Contest (pain GRILLE (C) vs. Leyenda de Ocho)
[CUT TO: Our hosts are seated at the commentary table. Creed and McGinnis are looking at the camera but Terry is quite expectedly looking somewhere off his mark.]
AC: Well this is quite a surprise... Commissioner Nathan Fear is giving the Emerald City Champion the choice of his own opponent in tonight’s main event!
BM: Can he be serious? After everything Perfection’s done, he’s just going to make things easier for him? Perfection could pick ANYBODY as his opponent! He could pick somebody like El Cabron, or a fan out of the front row! Heck, he could even pick TERRY here and finish the match in under five second!
TA: Hey now! Perfection might be THAT damn good, but I think the legendary IDOL of professional wrestling would last a little longer than five seconds!
AC: Perhaps you’re right, Terry... you could make it to ten, if you’re lucky. But right now, fans, we’re moments away from seeing the new Mount Rainier Champion of the Immortal Wrestling Federation, pain GRILLE, in his first defense as champion. Now that he’s fought his way to the top of the mountain, he’s got to find a way to secure his place!
BM: I’m not so sure he’ll find it easy, Aaron... because in light of what happened at our last event, I know there’s somebody in that locker room in particular who might be looking to throw him off the hill of glory!
TA: Spooky Doom?!
AC: No, Terry... Brian Mc-G can only be referring to the most electrifying athlete in the independent wrestling circuit right now... none other than LEYENDA DE OCHO!!
TA: “Most electrifying athlete?!” Pfft, yeah... maybe if he catches enough lightning bolts sitting around all day playing that Blumtendo Gamebox, or whatever they call it...
AC: Let’s go back real quick to the season premiere, King of the Mountain, back in Tacoma, Washington...
[FADE TO: Archived footage from the premiere event, King of the Mountain. A clip reveal sequences together pain GRILLE, posing as Spooky Doom, clocking Leyenda de Ocho before unmasking, followed by the reveal of the French Foreign Legion. In the next sequence, GRILLE clears the ring and claims the Mount Rainier Championship, with camera angles clearly showing the FFL interfering with the action.]
AC: First you can see pain GRILLE making his first formal appearance in IWF ring by blindsiding the fan favorite, Ocho... and there you can see the French Foreign Legion blatantly sticking their noses in the main event of King of the Mountain, which directly contributed to his winning the title!
TA: Kinda unusual seeing some Frenchmen showing some real BALLS. Hard not to admire it, if you ask me!
[FADE TO: The commentary table once again, as Aaron and Brian grimace over the recap footage, and Terry wears an approving smirk.]
BM: Well clearly, pain GRILLE and the French Foreign Legion are using their strength in unity to enact a hostile takeover of the Immortal Wrestling Federation.
AC: You could be right, Brain. And the Mount Rainier Title is one thing, but let’s not forget that the bigger picture is when both of those titles are eventually unified into the Washington State Heavyweight Championship. But here’s something interesting... the following was a video submitted to the Immortal Wrestling Federation offices shortly after King of the Mountain. Let’s take a look...
[CUT-TO: the Immortal Wrestling Federation backdrop with "Viva la GRILLE" spray painted in purple over the top. RENDRE SINGE stands there, holding up the silver plated Mount Rainier Championship high above his head with both hands, the lighting reflecting off the championship. The rest of the FRENCH FOREIGN LEGION stand around behind the man who takes centre-stage: PAIN GRILLE. He wears a purple toast mask with the mouth region cut-out, presumably so you can specifically see the shit-eating grin stretched across his face.]
GRILLE: Hello, Immortal Wrestling Federation. It is I, pain GRILLE, zee REIGNING Mount Rainier Champion. Zat is right, mon freres, I am zee Champion. I defeated zose puppets management dangled from zee rafters and zen? Zen I cut zeir string. Zey all fell. To zee floor. In a 'eap in zee ring and zere was one man avec zee fortitude to stand 'igh above zee world, atop of Mount Ranier, to become zee Champion.
[Spits on the floor. Thumbs at the Championship belt.]
GRILLE: And finally, I 'ave been crowned deservingly.
Zough...
(sighs) it is only bitter sweet for me, mon ami. See, zese Powers Zat Be wish for me to jump t'rough so many 'oops to climb to zee very pinnacle of zis company. See, zee real title zat I want is avec Perfection. Zis is zee belt zat I want. I do not want silver plating.
I - WANT - GOLD!
And it does not matter 'ow many 'urdles Nat'an Fear can find to stand in zee way of my sprint to zee finish line as I will overcome zem. Toget'er...
(points at his entourage) ...we will overcome. Zee French Foreign Legion will overcome.
[Snatches the belt off of SINGE.]
GRILLE: I am NOT second fiddle. I am NUMBER - ONE!
And zee sooner Nat'an Fear understands zat I will not settle for second best zee better. Zee sooner Perfection understands zat I will do everyt'ing I can to snatch 'is belt from 'is grasp zee better. Zee sooner zat you ALLLLL understand zat pain GRILLE is zee Best T'ing Since Sliced Bread zee better.
[Shoves it back into Singe's clutches who once again holds it high above his head.]
GRILLE: Johnny Niles. El Cabron. 'ooever you wish to t'row at me I will detroy zem all to show zem zat I am zee best wrestler in zis company.
But zere is ONE - MAN I t'ink already understands.
Leyenda de Ocho -- Ever since you stepped up onto my announce table in zee IGC I KNEW zat you were destined for your own demise at my 'and. I knew zat I would crush you beneat' my 'eel. I KNEW zat I would one day stand above you and spit in your eye.
And as I progress in zis promotion, to zee very top, I will on spit at you from 'igher vantage points. Because I 'ave ALLLLL zee vantage points. And you will never be able to ascend to anyt'ing above being zee jobber I know zat you are.
Every time you try to ascend to my level I will kick you back down to eart'.
Every time you climb another rung I will kick zee ladder out from under you.
I despise everyt'ing you represent, Leyenda. All zee 'and-outs zese Corporate puppet masters give you. Zee red carpet. Zee video game websites. Zee t-shirts. I spit on zee icon zey try to build around you, Leyenda. Foundations in a false pariah.
I want you to feel zee pain zat I felt when I came up t'rough zee industry to zis very moment when I 'old zee Mount Rainier Championship. You might be zee best rookie in zis industry but I see you for what you really are.
Just anot'er puppet 'oo needs 'is strings cut to plummet back to eart' and REALLY understand what zis industry is.
It's a cold, calculating mistress and zee only way you can assure your fate is to take it in your own 'ands.
[Thumbs at his belt.]
GRILLE: I took my fate by zee ears and skull fucked it into submission, Ocho. You failed. You could not beat Perfection where I will. I will pull zee wings off zat little fly and watch him crawl around before I press my boot 'eel down upon 'im and feel every bone in 'is body crush beneat' zee weight of my magnitude.
[Defiant fist raised in the air. The others join, except for SINGE, with the fist raise.]
GRILLE: Viva la GRILLE!
[CUT TO: The ring, where the ring announcer Donald Bell and the official Tony Daniels are ready to begin the next match.]
IWF MOUNT RAINIER TITLE CONTEST
PAIN GRILLE © -VS- LEYENDA DE OCHO
AC: Clearly some animosity between those two, and the Frenchman is showing no regrets for what he did to Leyenda de Ocho back at King of the Mountain!
TA: Gotta admire a man who prides himself in his work, though!
AC: Be as it may... one couldn’t help but wonder if the attack on Ocho by the French Foreign Legion didn’t affect the outcome in his challenge against Perfection from the Emerald City Championship. But Ocho may yet be a champion himself by the end of tonight, should he succeed in getting his revenge on the nefarious pain GRILLE! Donald Bell and Tony Daniels are waiting in the ring, so let’s get to it!
[CUE UP: “Spontaneous Devotion” by Random. The fans pop wildly as the lights dim and a brief laser light show heralds the entrance of LEYENDA DE OCHO, stepping through the curtain in his pastel-pink Little Mac mask, along with matching trunks and boxing gloves for the occasion. Bumping his fists a few times, he makes his way down the aisle slapping hands with the fans and getting them pumped up.]
AC: The roof is about to come off the Yakima Sundome, ladies and gentlemen! Leyenda de Ocho has arrived, and the Immortal Wrestling fanbase is in near hysterics for the Cartridge Crusher!
TA: A sad day of age we live in when such an insignificant NERD can get this kind of following, while other, more deserving guys in that locker room get the snub!
AC: And if you ask me, Terry, there isn’t anyone more deserving of praise and notoriety than the man who is right now circling the ring, taking in the support of the fans in the ringside seats! Leyenda de Ocho was proclaimed the FWC 2012 Rookie of the Year for a significant reason, and part of that has to do with his contributions to the ring! You can either love him or hate him, but you can’t deny that the man wears his heart on his sleeve, and devotes a passion to this sport unlike few we’ve ever seen!
TA: Oh geez... you’re so hopped up on the bandwagon, you’re practically sitting shotgun!
[CUE UP: “La Marseillaise”, the French National Anthem. Immediately, cheers melt into jeers as the FRENCH FOREIGN LEGION occupy the stage, complete with fRiTtUrEs waving red, white, and
sacre bleu of the Tricolore, and RENDRE SINGE boosting the IWF MOUNT RAINIER TITLE high in the air. Amid the group appears the champion himself, PAIN GRILLE, who steps out to the forefront to boost a fist in defiance of the spiteful audience before leading the charge down the rampway.]
AC: And here comes the arrogant champion himself, pain GRILLE, and I’m not at all surprised to see him once again being escorted to the ring by the other members of the French Foreign Legion!
TA: Nothing wrong with having friends in this sport, A-C!
AC: No, but there is something wrong when those friends insist on following you to the ring for every match and directly get involved in the action! Let’s not forget, thanks to the interference of the French Foreign Legion back at King of the Mountain, pain GRILLE was able to acquire that Mount Rainier Title! Are you saying you don’t think they’ll do anything to get involved this time around?
BM: I feel as an unbiased sportscaster, that I have to give them the benefit of the doubt... but it’s hard to assume they have something up their sleeve for tonight.
TA: The both of you have no idea what you’re talking about. pain GRILLE simply needs his crew to watch his back and offer some protection from the REAL threats out there. A man who boldly puts himself out there on the line makes fast enemies, after all...
AC: You can say that again...
[The French Foreign Legion overtake the ring, continuing to incite the anger of the audience by insisting they rise out of respect for the French national anthem. Ocho stands his ground, refusing to give the ring to this frenzied pack of foreigners. A stand-off ensues, with members of the FFL pointing threateningly over the shoulders of the Mount Rainier champion to the brave challenger standing alone on the other side of the ring, but eventually Tony Daniels shoos them from the ring in order to get things started.]
BELL: Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall and will be for the Immortal Wrestling Federation Mount Rainier Championship! Introducing first, the challenger... coming to us from Roger’s Park of Chicago, Illinois... he weighs in at one-hundred and eighty-eight pounds... GIVE IT UP for the CARTRIDGE CRUSHER... LEYENDA... DE... OCHOOOO!!!
CROWD: *POP!!*
[Ocho pumps his fists, holding in his thumbs so that only eight fingers are extended.]
BELL: And now, the opponent... representing the Republic of France, and accompanied by members of the French Foreign Legion... weighing in at one-hundred and eighty five pounds... he is the IMMORTAL WRESTLING FEDERATION MOUNT RAINIER CHAMPION... HE IS... PAAAAAIN GRILLE!!
CROWD: “BOOOO!!!”
[pain GRILLE boldly holds his claim into the air, sticking a thumb into his chest as he spits vulgarities in his native tongue upon the American audience. Daniels takes the belt from him a moment later and holds it up to all four sides of the ring before handing it off to the timekeeper.]
AC: If there’s anybody who can stop a schemer like pain GRILLE, it’s Leyenda de Ocho! I gotta say, I’m excited to see this match-up!
BM: I’m with you there, Aaron! Both of these men match each other’s physical signatures, and both choose to compete beneath the mask. No doubt, we’re about to see some textbook
lucha libre in this fight!
TA: Ah, shucks... luchadores always give me a hankerin’ for some burritos...
AC: Looks like the official is giving the cue to the timekeeper now!
SFX: *DING! DING!*
[As soon as the bell sounds, the two masked wrestlers, who haven’t taken their eyes off of each other since the moment both of them came to be in the space of the ring at the same time, immediately charge toward each other. pain GRILLE quickly goes airborne with a diving knee, but Ocho dips his head low and runs beneath him. Both men freeze into place and spin around to face each other again, this time going the more simple route of locking up into the collar-and-elbow tie-up.]
AC: The Mount Rainier Title contest has officially begun, and both men quickly find themselves in the lock-up! Ocho’s trying to take control of the right wrist of pain GRILLE... but a quick SWEEP by the Toasted Terrorist quickly puts him on the mat!
BM: GRILLE crosses over to Ocho’s side, maintaining the head and positioning like a true Mixed Martial Artist!
AC: OH MAN, what a knee to the ribs... and a SECOND!! That took the wind right out of Ocho!
[pain GRILLE triumphantly perks up to his feet as Ocho clutches his ribs in pain before him, and takes the opportunity to gloat and incite some anger in the fans. Annoyed by their lack of praise, he decides to press them by offering to deliver a stiff kick to Ocho’s face. He doesn’t expect Ocho catching him by the ankle mid-kick and sweeping him to the mat as well.]
AC: And before he can even realize it, pain GRILLE finds himself on the mat, after making the mistake of gloating too early on in this match!
TA: What a cheap move!! Nacho was OBVIOUSLY playing possum!
AC: And what exactly do you find virtuous about kicking a man while he’s down?!
TA: Hey, anything goes in the Octagon!
BM: Not only is that not true, but this is the squared circle... not an eight-sided cage.
[Ocho and GRILLE scramble up to their feet in unison, with Ocho only a fraction of a second faster, giving him the breadth to slip out of the range of GRILLE’s swift retribution in the form of a high spinning kick to the head and throw his body into the ropes. Fans squeal and lightbulbs pop everywhere in the small area as Ocho glides majestically through the air...]
AC: Here’s Ocho off the ropes -- and INTO A BIG SPRINGBOARD MOONSAULT!! DOWN GOES PAIN GRILLE, with Ocho on top!
One!
Two!
And the champion kicks out! Leyenda de Ocho had some HANGTIME on that move!
TA: I agree! It’s TIME to see that scrawny nerd HANGED!
BM: Even so, GRILLE looked strong kicking out of that, even if he was stunned for a moment. Ocho may be coming to the ring bearing the likeness of Little Mac tonight, but pain GRILLE is anything BUT a Glass Joe!
[After pushing himself out from under Ocho, GRILLE storms back onto his feet as the challenger dashes into the ropes once again, and is waiting this time when he returns by going into the air with a cross-body block. GRILLE catches him and lets the momentum roll him over until he finds himself back on his feet with Ocho in his grasp, quickly dropping him over the knee.]
AC: pain GRILLE with a COUNTER to the cross-body by Ocho, goes right into those ribs once again with a RIB-BREAKER that nearly breaks the Cartridge Crusher in half!
TA: That would make him the Four-Bit Legend. What does that mean, he plays a bunch of Atari games?
AC: pain GRILLE is back on his feet and takes a bounce off of the ropes to gain some momentum... and Ocho is completely defenseless on the mat! pain goes into the air... SENSTON SPLASH!! And he stays on top for the pin!
One!
Two!
Ocho kicks out!
BM: The Mount Rainier Champion is targeting those ribs, impairing Ocho’s ability to breath and hampering his conditioning! As explosive of a talent as Leyenda de Ocho is, the Frenchman may yet find a way to diffuse his high-flying offense!
[A shot from outside the camera shows the French Foreign Legion closely following the action, a few members verbally giving their support to the Mount Rainier Champion as he gets to his feet and pulls Leyenda de Ocho back up with him. Immediately, Ocho gets dumped into a corner, where pain GRILLE further punishes with a frenzied combo of kicks and knees to the mid-section.]
AC: The champion is taking it to the challenger, continuing to focus on those ribs! He’s not letting up for anything, folks... he’s going to grind Leyenda de Ocho into a pulp, if it means keeping the Mount Rainier Title! Now pain GRILLE takes Ocho by the wrist, and there’s the Irish Whip! Ocho connects!
TA: OUCH! Bet he never had a controller connect into his game box quite like that!
AC: pain GRILLE comes following after him... GOING FOR THE KNEE -- NO!! Ocho darted out of the way!
CROWD: *POP!!*
[pain GRILLE launches himself, but his knee only hits the top turnbuckle, and he crashes off of the corner in shock and surprise. With the crowd cheering him on, Ocho tries to push back the pain lingering in his sides and pulls himself over to the adjoining corner. pain GRILLE pulls himself back to his feet just as Ocho bounces to the top rope...]
AC: Ocho with a chance to turn this around again... here he goes to the TOP ROPE -- NOOO!! pain GRILLE ROLLS ASIDE as the Cartridge Crusher came diving off with a MISSILE DROPKICK, but only hit the CANVAS for his efforts!
BM: A big risk becomes a big mistake for the challenger! Against any other opponent, that might have paid off... but pain GRILLE is just too quick for that. I almost have to wonder if Ocho’s ever fought an opponent as nimble and fast as himself!
AC: Speed and energy are definitely the masked high flyer’s greatest weapons in that ring, but pain GRILLE’s own physical skill set makes it all moot! To win the Mount Rainier Championship tonight, it’s not about who is the fastest, but who can THINK the fastest!
[GRILLE pulls Ocho to his feet yet again, trapping his arms with double-underhooks as he holds him into a front face-lock and punishing his ribs once again with a quick series of knee strikes, before following through with the suplex. Outside the ring, the French Foreign Legion cheer on their leader’s offensive domination, juxtaposed with the reaction from the fans.]
AC: pain GRILLE keeps up the pressure with a STIFF double-underhook suplex, and after taking half a second to give these Yakima fans a piece of his mind, here he floats over for a cover!
One!
Two!
Another kick-out by Ocho! But if pain GRILLE keeps chipping away in this manner, it won’t be long before the Mount Rainier Champion puts him down for good!
BM: Ocho is clutching the ribs, struggling to breath at this point! This kind of damage is already beginning to affect his stamina!
AC: pain GRILLE isn’t letting up... he takes a quick bounce off the ropes... INTO THE AIR, and DOWN ONTO THE CHEST of Leyenda de Ocho with BOTH KNEES! GRILLE back up... and ANOTHER double-knee drop across the chest! Going for the cover again! Could this be it?!
One!
Two!
NO!! Ocho keeps fighting on!
TA: He must have brought some extra lives into the arena tonight!
CROWD: “O-CHO!! O-CHO!! O-CHO!! O-CHO!! O-CHO!!”
[Incensed by their undying support, GRILLE pops back to his feet and demands the crowd to silence themselves, which only makes them cheer louder in sheer defiance. Hearing them chant his name, the 8-Bit Legend valiantly tries to force himself back to his feet. The Toasted Terror gets to him first, peppering the side of his head with some stiff elbows to keep him stunned before rolling him back to the mat and wrapping his legs around the challenger’s torso.]
AC: A bad situation just got worse for Ocho, now finding himself trapped into a leg-scissor applied from behind by the champion, pain GRILLE!
BM: pain GRILLE looking for a Rear Naked Choke... but Ocho got his hands up before GRILL could lock it in! Ocho’s gotta fight his way out of this now, because every second the Mount Rainier Champion squeezes down on his ribcage like that, he’s only getting weaker!
TA: As if he wasn’t weak enough!
AC: Leyenda de Ocho, with the prospect of putting the silver of the Mount Rainier Title around his waist tonight, is locked into a battle of perseverance, fighting this deadly submission attempt applied by pain GRILLE! How’s he going to get out of THIS one?!
TA: By tapping the hell out, obviously!
[Ocho, still fighting GRILLE’s choke attempt, makes an effort to escape by trying to roll to his sides, but the Frenchman keeps him anchored in the center of the ring. The mouth opening in the reigning Mount Rainier Champion’s mask shows a sneering grin somewhere been triumph and spite. Outside the ring, the French Foreign Legion continue to give him support by slapping the mat and waving the Tricolour, but it only seems to urge the fans to drown them out.]
CROWD: “O-CHO!! O-CHO!! O-CHO!! O-CHO!! O-CHO!!”
AC: The Cartridge Crusher, with these fans rallying behind him, digs deep to muster all he has left! He has to break free from this hold, or face utter defeat!
TA: And let’s be clear... pain GRILLE isn’t just going to BEAT him! He’s going to up and HUMILIATE this poster-boy punk!
AC: His arms are shaking and his eyes are full of fire! Ocho giving it everything he’s got, rocking back and forth, and pain GRILLE struggles to keep him still! He’s doing everything he can, desperately moving his legs... and wait, he plants his feet -- YES!! OCHO PUSHES OFF THE MAT with his feet and ROLLS HIMSELF BACKWARDS!
CROWD: *POP!!*
AC: GRILLE’s shoulders are PINNED TO THE MAT!
ONE!
TWO!
KICKOUT by the champion, but a near upset after a most BRILLIANT reversal!
TA: Yeah, but the champ’s not going to bite on that one! He’s barely broken a SWEAT!
[Ocho rolls through, escaping pain GRILLE’s scissor hold as both men separate and scramble to their feet. The defending champ gets up a half-second faster, with Ocho showing he still hasn’t quite caught his breath. He quickly reels the challenger in with a clinch hold across the back of the head and ROCKS HIM with a hard knee strike! Ocho falls to a knee, and pain GRILLE hits the ropes...]
AC: KNEE STRIKE stuns Ocho, and here goes the Mount Rainier Champion, in motion... looking for the SHINING WIZARD -- NOO!! OCHO POPS UP and STOPS GRILLE IN HIS TRACKS with a FIST RIGHT TO THE MID-SECTION!!
CROWD: *POP!!!*
TA: DAMNIT!! He was SO CLOSE to kicking his head off!
BM: pain GRILLE tried to pull an old-school BALD BULL on Ocho’s Little Mac, but the 8-Bit Legend knew exactly what to do! That shot went straight into GRILLE’s diaphragm, sucking all the air out of him!
AC: Nobody knows the Shining Wizard better than Leyenda de Ocho, and he wasn’t about to fall victim to his own finishing maneuver! pain GRILLE was looking for the killing blow, but now the challenger might have a chance to turn this around!
[The French Foreign Legion look like they’re in the midst of a panic while the arena fills up with the roar of the fans. Ocho fights to get to his feet while GRILLE struggles to do the same, both fighting just as hard to get their wind back. Both get to their feet at the same time, and pain GRILLE, spurned by his hatred, acts first by charging at Ocho with a wild high kick to the head. Ocho deftly ducks the attack and traps the champ around the head and through the legs...]
AC: pain GRILLE with the Yakuza kick, but it’s DUCKED by Ocho! Ocho spins him around... EXPLODER SUPLEX!!! It’s all coming apart for pain GRILLE!
TA: HE’S USING A CHEAT CODE!!
BM: What the HELL are you talking about, Terry?! How could he POSSIBLY be using a cheat code!?!
AC: Leyenda de Ocho looking for the cover, and the win!
ONE!
TWO!
NO!! pain GRILLE managed to get the shoulder up, keeping his championship reign alive for a little longer, but the end could now be drawing near!
TA: Let’s not get carried away with ourselves, Dave!
[Ocho leaves GRILLE on the mat as he goes to a turnbuckle and steps through the ropes to scale to the top. He’s delayed only for a second as members of the French Foreign Legion come around to his side of the ring in a threatening manner, but he quickly points them out and warns them not get involved, and the referee Tony Daniels subsequently shooes them away. Ocho perches himself on the top rope as GRILLE slowly gets to his feet, looking a little dazed...]
AC: Leyenda de Ocho in position on the top rope... could be another big risk maneuver coming up!
TA: And hopefully another big FACEPLANT! pain GRILLE won’t fall for this!
AC: GRILLE is back on his feet... turns around, and HERE COMES OCHO, FLIPPING OFF THE TOP ROPE WITH THE DOUBLE AXE-HANDLE... and pain GRILLE deftly DUCKS UNDER HIM -- NO, WAIT! OCHO LANDED ON HIS FEET!
TA: HUH?!
CROWD: *POP!!*
BM: Ocho KNEW pain GRILLE was going to dodge that!
AC: Ocho from behind -- jumps onto GRILLE’s shoulders -- AND FLIPS HIM RIGHT TO THE MAT WITH THE VICTORY ROLL!!
ONE!
TWO!
THR -- NO!! pain GRILLE just BARELY got the shoulder up!
[pain GRILLE breaks free from the pin, scrambling back to his feet looking absolutely flabbergasted and cursing in French. He goes for another wild high kick, but his anger ruins his aim, and Ocho retaliates with a stern forearm that knocks him back against the corner.]
AC: Ocho has the champion right where he wants him now, interchanging shots between the face and the gut!
BM: JAB! BODY BLOW! JAB! BODY BLOW!!
TA: That’s REALLY annoying the hell out of me, Brian! Knock it off!
AC: Ocho onto the second rope now, switching between rights and lefts into pain GRILLE’s face!
CROWD: “ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT!”
BM: UP! UP! DOWN! DOWN! LEFT! RIGHT! LE --
TA: DAMNIT, BRIAN, I SAID KNOCK IT OFF!!
[By this point, unable to watch any more of this, fRiTtUrEs and Rendre Singe climb up to the apron, calling Tony Daniels’ attention away from the action as he sternly tells them to take a hike or he’ll ring the bell. Almost as soon as his back is turned, pain GRILLE lifts the knee right between Ocho’s legs!]
AC: Wait a second, the French Foreign Legion are on the apron, trying too -- LOW BLOW!! MY GOD, pain GRILLE put his entire KNEE into that one!
CROWD: “BOOOOOOO!!!”
TA: What else was the man supposed to do, A-C?!
AC: The Cartridge Crusher drops to the mat in complete agony, and now pain GRILLE is looking to capitalize, climbing to the top rope... Ocho trying to get back to his feet!
BM: But he may not be back up for much longer!
AC: Here comes pain GRILLE, OFF THE TOP... GOOOOD GAWD ALMIGHT, he NEARLY KICKED OCHO’S HEAD OFF with a DIVING SPINNING HEEL KICK!!
TA: YES!! pain GRILLE wins by FATALITY!!
[The crowd boos and jeers loudly as Tony Daniels finally gets fRiTtUrEs and Singe off the apron, but the damage has already been done. He turns around to find Ocho lying lifelessly on the mat, with the Mount Rainier Champion putting a wad of spit onto the mat next to his head and wiping his feet. Disgracefully pushing Ocho over so that he’s on his back, GRILLE draws the thumb across his neck and points it downward as he goes to the next corner.]
TA: Oh yeah, baby! Time to bring out
la guillotine and put this one in the books!
AC: The 8-Bit Legend was fighting his way toward victory, but now the Toasted Terror has quite disgracefully turned the tables, and he could be going for the AWFUL TOWER to finish this one!
CROWD: “O-CHO!! O-CHO!! O-CHO!! O-CHO!! O-CHO!!”
[The French Foreign Legion angrily try to hush the fans, but it’s a futile effort. On the mat, Leyenda de Ocho is beginning to stir, kicking his legs and moving his head to the sides. At the top rope, the Mount Rainier Champion, pain GRILLE, gives the fans a final insulting salute as he glides off of the top rope...]
AC: PAIN GRILLE OFF THE TOP...
...
...AND OCHO ROLLS OUT OF THE WAY!!
CROWD: *MEGA-POP!!!*
TA: NOOOO, I THOUGHT HE WAS FINISHED!!
BM: Leyenda de Ocho just cashed in his LIMIT BREAK!! I’m not sure if he was playing possum or if he simply acted out of sheer desperate instinct, but he just saved himself from having his CHEST crushed in by the double stomp!
AC: And the champion landed STIFF and PAINFULLY on both feet! pain GRILLE drops to a knee, completely stunned by the agony... wait, Ocho back up -- OCHO OFF THE ROPES --
O-CHO WITH
THE ACTUALIZZZZEERRRRR!!!
[The ROOF nearly comes off the small events arena as off the fans burst out of their seats in unison and cheer madly. pain GRILLE’s head bounces off of the Shining Wizard, lingers with the face frozen horror for only half of a second, and drops to the mat. Outside the ring, the French Foreign Legion are incredulous, shaking their heads and pulling frantically at their masks.]
TA: THIS CAN’T BE HAPPENING!! SOMEBODY, STOP HIM! PULL THE PLUG OUT ON THE T-V!!
AC: OCHO HAS HIM... OCHO INTO THE ROPES -- NO, WAIT!! Baisers grabbed the ankle! Now dRESSAGE is getting the OTHER ANKLE!! WAIT A SECOND... the FRENCH FOREIGN LEGION ARE DRAGGING THE CHALLENGER FROM THE RING!!
TA: EXCELLENT!! My prayers have been answered!
AC: This is BLATANT INTERFERENCE... and Tony Daniels is CALLING FOR THE BELL!!
SFX: *DING! DING! DING!*
[The crowd reaction, beyond explosive just a moment ago, chokes in a gasp and does a complete nose-dive into more heat that even the furnaces of hell can withstand. Yakima’s wrestling fanbase rains garbage and concessions upon the ring, the most landing ring where the French Foreign Legion converge upon and stomp the defenseless Leyende de Ocho where he lays. Meanwhile, Daniels explains the situation to Bell.]
BELL: Ladies and gentlemen, due outside interference acting on his behalf, pain GRILLE has be been... DISQUALIFIED! As a result, announcing the winner of the match...
LEYENDA DE OCHO!
[The announcement does nothing to cool the fans, as the “victor” is yanked up to his feet and rolled into the ring. Rendre Singe brings the Tricolour as dRESSAGE brings the Mount Rainier Title, and both men assist the retaining-by-default champion in his slow recovery from the knock-out kick to the head.]
AC: I DON’T BELIEVE IT!! ONCE AGAIN, Leyenda de Ocho has been ROBBED of a championship, just when victory is in his grasp!
TA: HAHAHAHA, oh, it’s a beautiful story, isn’t it?! He’s like that Greek myth, Syphilis!
BM: I think you mean Sisyphus, Terry... but I can definitely second your shock and outrage, A-C! Leyenda de Ocho was just a corkscrew lionsault away from winning the Mount Rainier Championship, and out of sheer desperation, the French Foreign Legion spoiled his moment of glory, just to protect the image of their leader! It’s merely a bittersweet victory for Leyenda de Ocho, who at least has the D-Q go his way this time around... but the title, unfortunately, can’t change hands that way!
AC: And the French Foreign Legion aren’t quite finished for Leyenda de Ocho! fRiTtUrEs and Baissers are holding Ocho up by the arms! He’s completely DEFENSELESS in there!
[The fans keep raining on the jeers as pain GRILLE gets back on his feet, Mount Rainier Title on one shoulder and French Flag on the other. Rubbing the sore spot in his head, he angrily approaches the audacious challenger and technical victory, rubbing the Tricolour in his face and pegging the side of his face with a disrespectful open-handed slap. Still unsatisfied that his opponent hasn’t suffered enough, he orders him dropped to the mat and backs up to get some distance.]
AC: Come on, this is completely unnecessary!
TA: Wrestling One-Oh-One, A-C... adding insult to injury is the BEST way to send a message!
AC: pain GRILLE SPRINTING FORWARD... PUNT TO THE -- NO!! OCHO CATCHES HIM BY THE FOOT!!
CROWD: *POP!!*
AC: pain GRILLE stumbles, and Ocho whips him by the leg to the mat! Ocho BACK ON HIS FEET!!
TA: WHAT?! Where does he keep getting this EXTRA CONTINUES?!
BM: The Cartridge Crusher WON’T TAKE THIS any more! He’s FIGHTING BACK!!
AC: He’s CLEANING HOUSE!!
[fRiTtUrEs steps in first, but whiffs on a lariat, and turns around right into a leg-scissor takedown by Ocho, which bowls him straight into dRESSAGE, and both tumble through the ropes. Baissers acts next, but Leyenda de Ocho meets him with a standing dropkick that sends him to the outside as well. Rendre Singe hops onto Ocho’s back and attempts to choke him with the French flag, but Ocho reacts quickly but ducking forward and throwing his attacker to the mat. As Singe pops to his feet, Ocho delivers a swift kick to the seat of his pants to push him through the ropes and out of the ring.]
AC: It’s just OCHO and GRILLE left in the ring!
BM: But not for much longer! pain GRILLE sees the odds are against him once again, and dashes out of there before Leyenda de Ocho can get to him!
TA: Hey now, the match is over! He’s got better things to do, like handle with this unfortunate loss!
AC: Unfortunate my foot, Idol! pain GRILLE and the French Foreign Legion might be walking out of here with the Mount Rainier Title, but they won’t be moving on if Leyenda de Ocho has something to say about it!
BM: Can’t overlook the fact that Ocho also walked away from this with a technical win. That has to give him some kind of leverage... a guaranteed rematch, at least.
AC: Maybe we can get an answer to that right now. Folks, we’re going to take you to the back for just a moment while our own backstage correspondent, Gail Martin, is at the office of the Commissioner, for their take on this outcome! Gail?
[FADE TO: The backstage area, right outside the door leading to the office of the Commissioner, which is currently closed. Standing between the door in the camera are GAIL MARTIN, standing ready with a pretty smile and a microphone. Next to her is the assistant to the IWF Commissioner, MISS PAZ, who looks rather distracted.]
MARTIN: Thanks guys! Right now, Mr. Fear isn’t allowing anybody into his office as he works out the finer details in our next event. However, I’m here with his assistant, Miss Paz, who has agreed to answer a few questions on behalf of the commissioner.
PAZ: Let’s make it a quick few, Gail. We’re all very busy, and we’ve got a main event to get.
MARTIN: Of course... but let’s talk about the last match, and the way it ended. Don’t you think Leyenda de Ocho deserves another chance, especially after all he’s gone through?
[Paz shrugs indifferently.]
PAZ: Everyone should know by now that this industry isn’t very flexible on giving people second chances... and while he’s a very entertaining personality and a fine talent, I don’t know of any reason why the company should show any favoritism on his behalf...
[The fans filling the arena, watching the interview unfold from the projection screen set up around the entry-way, immediately give a negative response to this answer. Paz turns her head slightly to the sound, awkwardly biting her lip...]
PAZ: On the other hand... given how overly popular Ocho has become with the fans... it might be within our best interests to give him at least one more opportunity.
MARTIN: Will he earn a rematch against pain GRILLE? Or how about the Emerald City Champion, Perfection?
PAZ: I’m not saying anything until things have been made more certain. What I know now is that just beyond that door, Mr. Fear is putting to work something that might involve BOTH champions in the same ring at the next event. I’m sorry for his luck, but Leyenda de Ocho may have to wait until Surge before he gets another chance at the gold.
CROWD: “O-CHO! O-CHO! O-CHO! O-CHO!”
[The energized cheers of the fanbase again tears at Miss Paz’s mind.]
MARTIN: Are you sure the Commissioner won’t reconsider, even in the slightest??
PAZ: Ugh... FINE, fine... I’ll put a word in and see what I can do. Now if you’ll excuse me...
[The crowd roars their approval as Paz knocks on the door to signal her entry and slips inside, giving Gail the attention of the camera.]
MARTIN: Well guys, there you have it! Nothing is certain as of yet, but if what you saw gave you any indication, the front office would do well to remember who the fans come to see! Back to you!