"Pain may be inevitable, but misery is optional"
-----
FADE IN....
A hallway....
Upon it are several old portraits....
To those who take care to inspect closely, they are obviously photos of the man that the wrestling world knows as 'The Ego Buster'......
A younger face appears in these shots....a more carefree face....yet not without trace of worry even then....
Still, a smile is present....the type of smile that the wrestling world never sees......
Not a smirk....
An actual smile....
On one heavily muscled shoulder, held up for the photographer to see is the reason....a young girl.....
Obviously she favors her father, yet a hint of her mother's Asian ancestry is clear....
Happier times.....
Before scandal took hold.....
Before the business.....
Before many decisions that would forever render that smile unique, forever lost in a past unable to be recaptured......
The video shot pulls back.....
DAN RYAN staring at the photograph, no expression on his face.....that well known smirk still not present.....
Ryan: "It's interesting, isn't it?"
"For all of the ways that every one of us who live this sport come into our demons, it usually is tracable back to the same basic issues."
"Has that thought ever struck you, Shane?"
"Have you ever sat back and thought of the perils of this sport? How many of us simply fade into oblivion....sad shells of our former selves?"
"How often do we achieve great professional success only to go home to a bottle....or a pill? How often do we return to empty homes and ghosts of former lives and find ourselves full of regret?"
"How common is it?"
"More common than any of us would believe going in...."
"I entered this business out of a pure love for the sport. I wrestled as an amateur from the time I was old enough to join a wrestling team until I graduated from high school. I would have continued to the college ranks had my family situation not so drastically changed."
"My parents moved to Japan....and I was happy to go with them. The pure art of wrestling is highly respected in that country, and though I was not one of them I fit in rather well."
"My parents disapproved naturally."
"But when you have a burning desire to eat, sleep and breathe everything about the art form....every hold....every joint lock that renders your opponent unable to do anything but tap....not to mention....when you're 6'8" and almost 280 as a high school senior....."
smile...
"Well...it was damn near impossible to steer me into just about anything else."
"Those days were the days where a career in professional wrestling seemed like a dream. My family was comfortable...not rich, but they wanted for nothing."
"But I insisted on making it by my own merit and by my own hand."
"I was poor. But the poorest person is not the one without a nickel, it's the one without a dream."
"Does that overly romanticize things for you, Shane?"
"Do I sound like a cliche'?"
"Maybe it's because we all go through the same struggles. Me in Japan....you in New Orleans perhaps....."
"But no matter where it lies....where it is born....it pushes us forward to the same choices."
"As success comes, everything else in your life takes a back seat."
"Show me the man who has avoided the pratfalls of this business without temptation or regret, and I'll show you the one true man in this business who deserves to be applauded."
"It can't be done."
"But sacrifice must always be made. Blessing can not come without sacrifice. If you've succeeded without sacrifice, it is because someone else has already made the sacrifice for you."
"But all too often, it is we who make the choice...we who sacrifice a life we would later wish to embrace...at an irreversable cost."
"My cost was a life as a father....a life as a son."
"The sacrifice made was my purpose as a father who showed a daughter the attention she deserved."
"The love was always there, Shane. The pain and bitterness, unfortunately was allowed to overwhelm it."
"When do we see what we've lost, Shane?"
"When do we truly understand the price of our choices?"
"I was a miserable human being prior to January 13th, 2003."
"I was successful. I was strong. I was a multiple time World Champion even then."
"But inside I was weak."
"What could have been crippling was turned into the one thing that made me stronger than I ever conceived I could be."
"I have no business being here today, Shane. I have no business being alive."
"Mark Windham once told me....that no matter what I do from here until my last breath...I will still always be a failed father...a failed son."
"Maybe so.....it's true that some things can never be changed."
"But maybe some things can. Maybe sometimes, those things which seek to destroy a man actually make him infinitely stronger."
"And I am stronger, Shane. I'm stronger as a man, stronger in the knowledge of who I am as that man....stronger in my profession."
"If it's truly clicked for you, Shane......all the better."
"But what loss have you truly suffered for your craft, Shane?"
"I'm sure that you wonder.....who is this guy to tell me I haven't suffered for what I do? What right does he have?"
"I only speak the same thoughts you take with you to bed every night."
"You come into this battle feeling reborn....as a phoenix taking flight into bold new frontiers.....not out of the flame....but into it."
"Sometimes the fire does more than refine, Shane."
"Sometimes the fire melts you down into the basic elements in all of us, exposing our inner faults for the world to see. Are you prepared for that?"
"A broken marriage....are you sure that there isn't something more?"
"What of the pressures of living up to expectations and not yet achieving that level of success?"
"What of the ever present search for what and who you really are?"
"What of the all too real possibility that this new relationship that gives you something new to live for....may end the same as the last?"
"Humble is something I will never be, Shane. I am what I am, and as I believe myself to be the best in the world....I expect to face this challenge head on as I have all the rest....and I expect to come out the other side victorious."
"Remember....they said I couldn't do this either."
"But it is those people who have never done anything who insist that something can not be done."
"There must be a vision of something bigger than today."
"The party isn't over yet, Shane."
"It's only just beginning."
FADE OUT...
-----
FADE IN....
A hallway....
Upon it are several old portraits....
To those who take care to inspect closely, they are obviously photos of the man that the wrestling world knows as 'The Ego Buster'......
A younger face appears in these shots....a more carefree face....yet not without trace of worry even then....
Still, a smile is present....the type of smile that the wrestling world never sees......
Not a smirk....
An actual smile....
On one heavily muscled shoulder, held up for the photographer to see is the reason....a young girl.....
Obviously she favors her father, yet a hint of her mother's Asian ancestry is clear....
Happier times.....
Before scandal took hold.....
Before the business.....
Before many decisions that would forever render that smile unique, forever lost in a past unable to be recaptured......
The video shot pulls back.....
DAN RYAN staring at the photograph, no expression on his face.....that well known smirk still not present.....
Ryan: "It's interesting, isn't it?"
"For all of the ways that every one of us who live this sport come into our demons, it usually is tracable back to the same basic issues."
"Has that thought ever struck you, Shane?"
"Have you ever sat back and thought of the perils of this sport? How many of us simply fade into oblivion....sad shells of our former selves?"
"How often do we achieve great professional success only to go home to a bottle....or a pill? How often do we return to empty homes and ghosts of former lives and find ourselves full of regret?"
"How common is it?"
"More common than any of us would believe going in...."
"I entered this business out of a pure love for the sport. I wrestled as an amateur from the time I was old enough to join a wrestling team until I graduated from high school. I would have continued to the college ranks had my family situation not so drastically changed."
"My parents moved to Japan....and I was happy to go with them. The pure art of wrestling is highly respected in that country, and though I was not one of them I fit in rather well."
"My parents disapproved naturally."
"But when you have a burning desire to eat, sleep and breathe everything about the art form....every hold....every joint lock that renders your opponent unable to do anything but tap....not to mention....when you're 6'8" and almost 280 as a high school senior....."
smile...
"Well...it was damn near impossible to steer me into just about anything else."
"Those days were the days where a career in professional wrestling seemed like a dream. My family was comfortable...not rich, but they wanted for nothing."
"But I insisted on making it by my own merit and by my own hand."
"I was poor. But the poorest person is not the one without a nickel, it's the one without a dream."
"Does that overly romanticize things for you, Shane?"
"Do I sound like a cliche'?"
"Maybe it's because we all go through the same struggles. Me in Japan....you in New Orleans perhaps....."
"But no matter where it lies....where it is born....it pushes us forward to the same choices."
"As success comes, everything else in your life takes a back seat."
"Show me the man who has avoided the pratfalls of this business without temptation or regret, and I'll show you the one true man in this business who deserves to be applauded."
"It can't be done."
"But sacrifice must always be made. Blessing can not come without sacrifice. If you've succeeded without sacrifice, it is because someone else has already made the sacrifice for you."
"But all too often, it is we who make the choice...we who sacrifice a life we would later wish to embrace...at an irreversable cost."
"My cost was a life as a father....a life as a son."
"The sacrifice made was my purpose as a father who showed a daughter the attention she deserved."
"The love was always there, Shane. The pain and bitterness, unfortunately was allowed to overwhelm it."
"When do we see what we've lost, Shane?"
"When do we truly understand the price of our choices?"
"I was a miserable human being prior to January 13th, 2003."
"I was successful. I was strong. I was a multiple time World Champion even then."
"But inside I was weak."
"What could have been crippling was turned into the one thing that made me stronger than I ever conceived I could be."
"I have no business being here today, Shane. I have no business being alive."
"Mark Windham once told me....that no matter what I do from here until my last breath...I will still always be a failed father...a failed son."
"Maybe so.....it's true that some things can never be changed."
"But maybe some things can. Maybe sometimes, those things which seek to destroy a man actually make him infinitely stronger."
"And I am stronger, Shane. I'm stronger as a man, stronger in the knowledge of who I am as that man....stronger in my profession."
"If it's truly clicked for you, Shane......all the better."
"But what loss have you truly suffered for your craft, Shane?"
"I'm sure that you wonder.....who is this guy to tell me I haven't suffered for what I do? What right does he have?"
"I only speak the same thoughts you take with you to bed every night."
"You come into this battle feeling reborn....as a phoenix taking flight into bold new frontiers.....not out of the flame....but into it."
"Sometimes the fire does more than refine, Shane."
"Sometimes the fire melts you down into the basic elements in all of us, exposing our inner faults for the world to see. Are you prepared for that?"
"A broken marriage....are you sure that there isn't something more?"
"What of the pressures of living up to expectations and not yet achieving that level of success?"
"What of the ever present search for what and who you really are?"
"What of the all too real possibility that this new relationship that gives you something new to live for....may end the same as the last?"
"Humble is something I will never be, Shane. I am what I am, and as I believe myself to be the best in the world....I expect to face this challenge head on as I have all the rest....and I expect to come out the other side victorious."
"Remember....they said I couldn't do this either."
"But it is those people who have never done anything who insist that something can not be done."
"There must be a vision of something bigger than today."
"The party isn't over yet, Shane."
"It's only just beginning."
FADE OUT...