Re: DEFCON ARC DISCUSSION THREAD -- DEFtv 66 IS LIVE!
I didn’t check for typos before posting this. Don’t care
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NIGHT ONE
RAIN CITY RONIN VS. POP CULTURE PHENOMS VS. THE ANGEL CITY EXXXPRESS
Ayyy, my boy Klein is slowly growing that confidence. Presenting a cheese platter for The Faithful? Solid ring entrance. I also like how the crowd have cottoned-on to the fact that the PCPs absolutely hate being touched by poors, and therefore do it at every opportunity. Nice little characterisation touch there.
The D’s early shenanigans were fun. I hated the brief segment with Kerry and Rocko fighting each other, though. A referee cannot disqualify a wrestler for inactivity, so why would they even think about going at it? Yes, okay, they were both the legal men, and they’re both stern fighting types, but I don’t understand why they’d risk doing damage to one another and not just try to tag someone else in immediately. The the PCPs weirdly fighting each other later-on. I genuinely do not understand this, guys.
There’s lots of daft comedy peppered throughout the match, which is pretty much what I expected. PCPs and ACX are ridiculous in the best kind of way, and the RCR are an excellent foil for both teams. This is the kind of match that I’d probably despise in real life, but am generally entertained by in efeds. Comedy is very subjective but I think you guys do a good job of consistently entertaining the vast majority of the roster. That being said, I would’ve liked a few more wrestling sections. Personal preference, and I know it’s difficult with the PCPs involved, but joke after joke after joke can start to get a little tiresome by the end.
I also like the way the action is written, particularly the shorter, snappier sentences. Things like that add a real sense of urgency to a match, which essential for ties like this, where the emphasis is on the action rather than the psychology.
For the most part I think this was a pretty solid match. The ending left me very cold, though. For a start, if all it took to one this was one partner lying down for the other, why wouldn’t RCR have done it when they were in the ring together, or ACX for that matter? Really doesn’t make any sense to me. Yes, the shenanigans are an effective heat cannon for the PCPs, but I genuinely cannot fathom the logic in this. There’s no way a referee can disqualify one wrestler for refusing to engage with another, and if that’s the stipulation, it’s a really daft one.
The match also finishes very abruptly, with little to no announcer reaction, and a harsh transition into the next segment. Sorry guys, but this match ended on a huge downer for me.
FACING THE UNKNOWN
Reaper has made the kind of start in DEFIANCE that reminds of the day Mikey Unlikely walked through the door and wrote all of the things on all of the shows. It’s really great to see a new guy getting so heavily involved before he’s even started a feud. Such efforts will go a long way here.
Anyway, the segment itself is pretty strong. I mentioned this in the UNCUT feedback, but I think you’ve done a good job of establishing Reaper’s ambiguity without being too vague or wishy-washy. You’ve been able to feed us tiny little scraps of information to keep us satiated until the next segment, which indicates a strong knowledge on how to plot and pace a story. I’m hooked on Reaper’s weird little quest already.
I enjoy the dynamic between Reaper and Terry. Terry is balanced, down-to-earth, and wise. He speaks calmly and logically, whereas Reaper feels a little more impulsive and erratic. I like that there’s already tension between them, though I’m very curious to see where it leads. At this stage, I think that some roster members *might* be able to guess the target’s identity, you’ve done a good job of not giving too much information away.
I was slightly taken aback by the closing dialogue section, though. Who was Reaper talking to here? Terry? Himself? The viewer? That was a little jarring, but maybe that’s the point. Bringing-up Penn and Impulse felt kind of random, too. I understand that he’s ruling Impulse out as a target, but the lead-in was cold. Again, maybe that’s the point.
KENDRIX VS. LAR
Kendrix’s ring entrance was good, but LAR’s was a little threadbare. An immediate question of balance, there. I would’ve also preferred a stronger introduction from the announcers: frame the match a little, recap the feud, talk about what LAR needs to do to overcome this obnoxious little shit tonight. Setting the scene is super important, IMO.
I enjoy the way the action is written. Very clear and precise. Good description of small little movements, yet none of it was wasted. This is a great way to help the reader visualise what’s going-on inside the ring. Excellent stuff there: no complaints at all.
The announcers are an issue for me. I’m aware that this is something that comes with experience, but what we have here are big paragraphs of action broken-up by the odd line or two from Keebs and Angus. There’s not much interplay between the two of them, neither are really going into any great detail to sell and explain what’s going-on in front of them. I think this is something that the fed has a problem with as a whole, so it’s certainly not just specific to this match, but it’s here, so I need to mention it (otherwise I’d be giving useless feedback).
Work on spacing things out a little better. Gimme some of those trademark Angus quips, and have Keebs get all Mauro Ranallo on our asses. Angus used to be a professional wrestler, too: he’s mostly going to sit there and bemoan everything Kendrix does, but his experience can also be used to explain exactly why certain moves hurt, etc.
I don’t care for the earlier finisher. I get that LAR was trying to put a quick beating on the guy, but a couple of minutes is far too soon to be pulling-out what is essentially a Burning Hammer, IMO. This is the kind of move that should be built-up to, and it’s not like a Superkick or Cutter than just be hit out of nowhere. It’s a move that takes some time to set-up and execute. Kendrix recovered from it very quickly, too. This is one of the most devastating moves in wrestling: sell it as such.
The match got more enjoyable for me once we got beyond those things, however, and Kendrix starting behaving like an annoying little prick. Loved the “who put the post there?!” line, and him targeting the arm is just classic heeling. Both characters came-off pretty strongly, and hey, the announcer/action balance improved when the action was restricted to smaller paragraphs. This appeared to switch around about the halfway point.
A few things to work on, but this was a good match. The announcer’s selling after the pinfall as good, as was JFK’s beatdown of LAR. I want this guy to get smacked in the mouth very soon.
ENDING OF A YEAR
It wouldn’t be a DEFIANCE PPV without a fire Curtis Penn promo. I’ve been interested in the character’s development lately. When all the ex-UTA guys flooded-in, Penn was paranoid about his place in the pecking order, and tetchy as hell. He came-off close to unstable at times, and it was a cool little way to approach to sudden influx. Now some time has passed, and he’s shaken away some of that tetchiness. Penn’s a lot more driven, and focused on what he needs to do, which makes him genuinely threatening here. He’s still pissed, but he’s found a way to focus it on his opponents, and tomorrow night, Impulse is gonna get it.
Particularly enjoyed the line about breaking-in a new puppy. It’s the best kind of heel promo for me, because Penn is absolutely sickened by Impulse’s presence, and he’s out to wipe him off the face of the Earth. Moreover, I absolutely believe every word that’s coming-out of his mouth.
Great stuff all-round. Penn, as one of the most tenured characters in DEFIANCE, feels like a strong main eventer at this point. Jon has been doing awesome stuff lately and regardless of how the match turns out, I’ve got a feeling we’ll be seeing Penn in a bigger spotlight very soon.
HARMONY VS. FRANK DYLAN JAMES
For some reason, I started-off not really feeling some type of way about this match but I really started getting into it as Harmony ramped-up the intensity.
This match is really, really well-booked. It’s almost perfect. I think that with the way the feud was set-up, both wrestlers’ opening gambits were gonna be interesting. Frank doesn’t really want to batter Harmony, but she’s so wound-up that he doesn’t really have a choice. It’s been an interesting angle all-round, particularly with Harmony getting so upset. What she interprets as “misogyny” is really just Frank being Frank, so while it’s kind of hard to dislike the big oaf for it, she’s absolutely right to be hacked-off. Really interesting dynamic. Good storytelling, and I think Harmony comes out of the feud looking very good.
I enjoyed the way she just chipped away at the dude. At the start, it’s like she’s flicking pebbles against a wall, particularly with the chops. Then she gets more and more assertive with it, and as she becomes a bigger pest, Frank has to up his own aggression. Just when the big guy’s like “fuck this all-together,” though, Harm grabs the stick and digs herself the biggest hole imaginable. Harm came with some real nastiness on the microphone: not sure if that was intentional or not, but it was probably required to convince Frank to come back to the ring.
The strong momentum continues when these two actually start wrestling. Harmony takes a whooping, but gets back into it with some quick tinylittlehumanbeing moves, although I would’ve liked a little more urgency in the writing through her shine period. Shorter sentences, quick descriptions, lots of gasps and emotions. Harmony’s gotta know that if Frank recovers and flattens her, it’s over, so a little bit of desperation here would’ve gone a long way.
Lots of heart in Harmony’s comebacks, even after some hellacious punishment from Frank. That goes a long way. I love that even after beating the snot out of her, Frank just throws her out of the ring, but is Harm getting counted-out? Hell fuckin’ naw. Really great stuff.
One thing I hated was the arm-drop spot when Frank had her locked in the bearhug. That’s some silly Hulk Hogan 80’s bollocks and one of my least favourite wrestling spots. Personal preference, but yuck.
Technical quibbles: some big blocks of action that could’ve used more announcer chatter, yadda yadda. See my comments on other matches.
Other than that, a very good match owing mostly to the way it was set-out and paced. I really think that telling a good story is the most important thing in any match, not the spots or the fancy writing or whatever. Good job, guys.
NOTHING
I wrote.
JASON NATAS VS. SEAN JACKSON
I wrote. Shame I didn’t get much of a chance to work with Mike, but life happens, and I’m very grateful that he let me use Jackson to complete Natas’ redemption story. I’ve been plugging away with this angle since October. It’s the kind of story I’ve wanted to tell for a long time, and after years of farting around with this character in various feds, I’m glad to finally have done something significant with him. I hope you all enjoyed it, and found it to be a satisfying blowoff.
IT HAS TO BE SAID
Really good start to this segment, Steve. I think I’ve said a few times that Kendrix benefits immensely from his association with Mikey Unlikely, whom I perceive to be the best heel in the fed at the moment, but he’s really starting to strike-out on his own at the moment. It’s great to see. I love the fact that we’re able to hate this guy for his own douchey tendencies now, and not just because of the company he keeps. Kendrix is just an obnoxious little ratbag and I think he’ll be a big hit throughout DEF*MAX, and the rest of his singles career.
It’s so important that he’s developing his own identity. As it stands, The Hollywood Bruvs are probably going to work more as singles wrestlers than a tag unit. They’re not always going to be in the ring at the same time, and they need to get over on their own. Both are doing a good job of that at the moment.
The the PCPs just show-up and act ridiculous and all is right in the world. Top seg.
MIKEY UNLIKELY VS. ANDY SHARP
I definitely feel that this lost a lot of juice through the paucity of Sharp’s appearances in recent weeks, but I get it. I’m still looking forward to the match, and hey, what a great lead-in from the commentators. Good summary of the night’s action thus far and it really hammered the SEG’s dominance home, which I’m still surprised about. I don’t think there’s one fully-functioning human being in the entire group.
Man, get the fuck outta here with this ring entrance. How the actual shit do you come-up with this stuff? It’s completely absurd. I mean, I expected something totally nuts, but not a goddamn POKEBALL. It’s entirely too long, which makes it absolutely perfect. Little more commentary during the final section would’ve been nice, but it’s not a major gripe.
Struggling to pick-out any major flaws with this one. I like how the action was paced, I like how both characters came across, I like how the commentary was used in-place of the action every now and then. Good heeling from Mikey throughout, with the flaps and the shit-talk. Particularly enjoyed the spot with mikey look around with his homies, only to be reminded of the “no interference” gimmick.
I think that the video interruption was an outstanding way to work around the lack of interferences. Really crafty stuff from the heels there. That said, I think it went on far too long. All Kendrix really had to do was appear on the screen and distract Andy with a quick “oi, mate.” It felt like Sharp was sitting around for at least a minute before anything really came of this, and it would’ve benefitted from some trimming, for sure. Distraction, roll-up, wham, done.
Post-match was fine, too. Sharp eats the injury and the faces come down for the save. At this point, I’m really pining for some comeuppance for the SEG, and I just can’t wait to see all of them get punched in the face simultaneously.
BOX/DEWEY VIDEO PACKAGE
Brilliant summary of the Box/Dewey relationship. I love the way you guys have incorporated so much history into the feud. For new readers, it can be pretty intimidating reading a feud like this. I include myself in that bracket, because while I’ve been here for a few arcs now, I’m nowhere near as familiar with the these characters’ history than some of the old heads around here. What you’ve done, however, is provide a shining example of how to refer to past events as a means of pushing the story forward, rather than a clutch. This was such a good segment, and I particularly loved the innocence coming-out of young Dewey here. Great, great, great.
BRONSON BOX VS. EUGENE DEWEY
Probably my most-anticipated match of either show, I’m not gonna lie.
The video package negated the need for a lengthy announcer lead-in. It told you everything you need to know. Love the special attention given to both entrances, even Box’s stripped-down approach. It’s a big show, and it demands little switch-ups like that.
Fucking LOVE how this thing starts. Bronson Box doing a goddamn suicide dive through the ropes, and the match kicks-off at 100mph. There’s absolutely no fucking around here. Big-match feel straight out the gates.
There’s a little discord between DEFsec’s reaction to the crowd spot in this match and in Cayle vs. Dane on night two, but whatevs. Nobody was to know.
Can’t not mention my perceived commentary/action balance issues after harping-on about it in earlier matches. Not gonna expand on it again, though.
Alright, this match is a fucking mess. The best possible kind of mess. What an absolute maelstrom of violence, ads. It’s the little touches that make it for me: things like the crowd catching Dewey when he falls from the roof, and Box soiling a certain t-shirt before rubbing it in his foe’s face. The intensity of this rivalry is reflected in the match, and while I’ve never been big on this kind of all-out arena brawls in real life, I absolutely love reading them in this format, particular when the description is this damn good.
Also like how the match started with an absolute shellacking from Box. What a great way to immediately build sympathy for Eugene, and have him fighting from beneath from the match’s very first minute. He gets back into it eventually, though. Eugene comes-off as a really endearing babyface, even when he’s lashing-out at Box with a Singapore cane. I’m kinda sad I wasn’t around for his face run, now.
The Faithful were really strongly characterised here too. Their thirst for violence over all else came-off really strongly throughout.
Very strong match, boys. You killed it here. Great pacing, great execution, and a very fitting blow-off for the feud. I think the obvious booking choice here would’ve been to have Eugene complete the redemption arc by going over: instead, he does it by exhibiting a ridiculous amount of heart, and forcing Box to use a move that doesn’t even belong to him to put him away. What a great story, guys.