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Aggression 63: Williamsburg, VA - 1/2/12

DBrunkGXW

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[FADEIN: The crowd in Williamsburg getting loud as pyro explodes on the top of the entranceway signaling the beginning of another episode of EPW Aggression, the camera sweeps through the crowd getting the fans to hold up signs and cheer loudly. CUTTO: The broadcast table where Dave Thomas, Dean Matthews and Mike Neely are sitting.]

DT: Welcome EPW fans to Aggression 63, I’m Dave Thomas here with Dean Matthews and Mike Neely and the hour of reckoning for so many is coming as Russian Roulette is right around the corner and tonight is the last chance for the guys in the locker room to build momentum into the battles we’ll be seeing on Pay-Per-View.

DM: Momentum is key both for the veterans but also for the newcomers as the renamed Mr. Sunshine makes his debut against a man looking to rebound this week in Jermaine Dawson.

MN: Dawson seems like he should be a tough guy, but Mr. Sunshine creeps me out, the man is missing more than a few screws.

DT: Then we have a triple threat match, as former Television Champion Cameron Cruise looks to get back on the winning track, but he’s up against two of the most dangerous men in this company in the form of Rezin and Copycat.

MN: Since Erik Black’s turned into Rezin the man is a complete psycho , he may well have ended the career of Olvir, and Copycat’s in his own world where he’s the only thing between us and damnation, while I respect Cruise’s game he’s got a tough road ahead of him tonight.

DM: And then the newly crowned and most likely still squabbling tag champions defend their gold, as The First and Eddie Burns face off against Team VIAGRA.

DT: High Flyer and Tony Davis got caught in a double team last week and it cost them their chance at the tag titles, this week it’s a straight up match and I think if First and Eddie aren’t on the same page the champs could be in trouble.

MN: Of course they aren’t going to be on the same page, cause the painted up goofball is on his high horse about everything and Eddie Burns understands what matters, and that’s winning!

DT: And the main event of the night, all three of EPW’s singles champions in action facing off against Steven Shane, Rich Mahogany and Dis, the men expected to be facing them at Russian Roulette.

DM: Hopefully the Dis situation as it relates to Stalker will be cleared up tonight, and I can tell you fans that there is a buzz in the locker room over this match, a lot of words have been said and I know Anarky can’t wait to make his opponents have to start backing up that talk with actions.

MN: I’m sure they will, Rich Mahogany already got a win over Anarky, the aura around the champ has faded and tonight I expect domination from the challengers in the main event.

DT: Well that’s one very silly man’s view of things, we’ll see who’s right at the end of the show.

[Anarky walks down the aisle, ignoring the fans, who are cheering for him, the belt draped over his shoulder, a microphone in his hand. He slides in under the bottom rope and stands up, raising his hand to silence the crowd.]

DT: But first, it looks like we’re gonna hear from the World Champion!

MN: A little warning would be nice. No music?

DT: Shhhh.

ANARKY: There’s been a lot of talk lately… about what kind of Champion I am. About how I don’t brag enough. About how I don’t take enough pride in this here belt. About how I’m supposed to be a leader.

Well you know what I say to that?

F*ck that noise.

So since I’m sick and tired of hearing Dis and Stalker and Distalker and Rich Mahogany and Impulse and every other nobody crawl out of the woodwork and explain what kinda man I’m SUPPOSEDA be… well… I figured I’d come here and let the mob have its say. After all… if this is the Empire, then you are our loyal subjects, no?

[Waits as the crowd cheers and he smiles.]

ANARKY: So when I say something and you happen to like it… all I wanna hear you say is… F*CK yeah. Understand?

CROWD: F*CK YEAH

ANARKY: Good, good.

See, while Dis and Stalker and everybody else was home cryin’ about how things should’ve been… was I not the man coming out here, night after night, never crying, never b*tching, never explaining how I could do it better, but just going out there and kicking ass like it was my JOB?

CROWD: F*CK YEAH!

ANARKY: And when they offered me a chance to walk into the cage against the Empire’s top competitors… did I not walk out your King?!

CROWD: F*CK YEAH!

ANARKY: And when First had used everything up just trying to stop Sean Stevens… was I not the man who left him for dead and became the new ruler of the Empire?!

CROWD: F*CK YEAH!

ANARKY: And I have I not come out, night after night, for YOU, my subjects… have I not taken on all challengers, have I not given you their blood, their courage, their sacrifice, have I not done all of this… for you?

CROWD: F*CK YEAH!

ANARKY: And while everybody else was talking… while everybody else was pretending that they knew what it was to be a Champion… that they knew what it took to lead… WAS I NOT THE ONE ACTING WHILE OTHERS WERE SPEAKING?

CROWD: F*CK YEAH!

ANARKY: AM I NOT THE CHAMPION OF YOUR EMPIRE???

CROWD: F*CK YEAH.

ANARKY: That’s what I f*cking thought. Now drink a beer, enjoy the show, and f*ck the haters.

[He throws down the mic as the crowd chants his name. He pulls a Miller Light out of his pocket, cracks it open, takes a sip, and raises it to the crowd. Many raise their glasses to him, and they all sip together. He smiles and walks away.]
 

DBrunkGXW

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Mr. Sunshine vs. Jermaine Dawson

[FADEIN: The ring where Jermaine Dawson is pacing around waiting for his opponent, after a beat MUSIC UP: “I Need A Doctor” by Eninem ft. Dr. Dre. Hits the air and Mr. Sunshine makes his way to the ring with the crowd jeering him. ]

TF: And his opponent…From Ann Arbor, Michigan weighing in at 232 pounds…MR. SUNSHINE!

DT: The Warhawk in the ring as Mr. Sunshine is making his way out here, from what we’ve seen of the former Rob Franklin we’ve got a real maniac on our hands.

MN: With all the mentally stable folks we have in EPW, how could you tell this guy is more insane than most people?

DM: For the first time in your life Neely, I think you might have come up with a good point.

MN: I don’t even know how to react to that. I’m going to pretend this never happened.

[Bell rings.]

DT: Mr. Sunshine charges and drops the War Hawk with a clothesline, and another one just as Dawson was getting to his feet…Mr. Sunshine now landing a SERIES OF VICIOUS KICKS TO THE KNEELING DAWSON!

DM: Mr. Sunshine might be all about sunshine outside the ring, but he sure as hell is all business inside the ring.

DT: Dawson pulled to his feet and Sunshine grabs him…BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEX AND A PIN!

ONE!!

TWO!!

NO!

DT: Dawson rolls a shoulder off the mat and gets rewarded with a series of stomps to the chest. Sunshine throws him into the corner and charges…NOBODY HOME! Dawson grabs him and whips him to the ropes…BACK ELBOW drops Sunshine. Dawson with a cover!

ONE!

TWO!

NO!

DT: Sunshine kicks out and Dawson grabs him…Suplex…NO! Sunshine reverses…SUPLEX OF HIS OWN! Mr. Sunshine gets to his feet and grabs Dawson….GUTWRENCH POWERBOMB!! He just STUCK the War Hawk!

DM: The offense of Dawson was nipped in the bud by Mr. Sunshine who’s now got this match totally under his control.

DT: Sunshine now going to the top rope…OFF THE TOP WITH A HEADBUTT!! HE CALLS THAT THE ICEPICK!! Mr. Sunshine keeping a baleful gaze upon the fallen Warhawk who’s in a world of trouble.

MN: This guy is just unsettling…Mr. Sunshine is a weird dude.

DT: Dawson now being set up…Mr. Sunshine hooks him…RUNNING JUMPING PILEDRIVER!!

DM: He calls that ‘Your neck is broken!’

MN: My neck isn’t broken, but Dawson’s might be!

DT: You’re full of wit Neely, the cover!

ONE!!

TWO!!

THREE!!

[Bell rings, MUSIC UP: “I Need A Doctor” by Eminem ft. Dr. Dre.]

TF: Here is your winner...MR…SUN!! SHINE!!

DT: Mr. Sunshine with a brutal and very impressive debut here in EPW, as he picks up a victory over Jermaine Dawson. We’ll be right back fans!
 

DBrunkGXW

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Kenny Lombardo, Private Dick

[FADEIN: Kenny Lombardo in the back.]

LOMBARDO: Fans I know that in a few moments Dis is supposed to have a big meeting with Dan Ryan to explain away the actions of Stalker at the last Aggression, but right now I’m going to expose Dis to the world. To do this I need a little help so I’ve decided to call in someone so please welcome a legend in this industry and a man who’s done it all here in EPW. I give you Joey Melton!

[Melton walks over to Lombardo. The crowd cheers.]

LOMBARDO: Joey are you ready now to help me confront Dis?

MELTON: Sure thing but I thought it was Stalker.

LOMBARDO: Well I know that’s what you wanted people to think Joey and I don’t know what you and Stalker had in mind with what happened last week. But we both know you can drop the charade Joey because you are Dis.

MELTON: What are you talking about? I’m not Dis!

LOMBARDO: I’ve had my team of private investigators look into everything and they came up with a solid lead in you Joey. You’ve been in every city EPW has visited since Dis has returned, how do you explain that?

MELTON: I’m a busy guy I got places to go and shows to attend to. You know how many Piggly Wigglys are open in America?

LOMBARDO: Well what about Toronto then? I don’t think they open those stores north of the border!

MELTON: Hey I wanted to attend a Bills game and there’s no way in hell you’re dragging me to Buffalo.

LOMBARDO: Stop trying to stonewall me, I got you cold Melton!

[A loud crash as the cameraman falls over, the camera doesn’t see what’s happening , from off camera we can hear a struggle, when the camera man gets back to his feet we see Dis with a cross arm breaker on Melton. ]

LOMBARDO: NO! STOP! Security we need help!

[A pop can be heard and Dis quits pulling on the arm and lets go. Melton rolls onto his side with the injured arm tight to his body. Dis rips the microphone away from Lombardo.]

DIS: [Voice distorted] Your detective work is as pathetic as this man’s career.

Joey, you failed me. You failed me so many times.

Sorry I had to do this to you.

Rest assured I’d have done the same to the Lunatic if he was in the building.

Now if you two will excuse me I have a meeting to attend.

[Dis shoves the microphone into Lombardo’s chest and walks away as EMT’s rush to Melton.]
 

DBrunkGXW

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Cameron Cruise vs. Copycat vs. Rezin

[FADEIN: The aisle where Cameron Cruise is making his way to the ring. “Killing In The Name Of” playing over the PA as the crowd jeers him.]

TF: The following contest is a triple threat match set for one fall, introducing first from Jacksonville, North Carolina weighing in at 263 pounds…CAMERON!!! CRUISE!!!

[The crowd continues to boo Cruise as he hits the ring, he raises his right arm to further inflame the crowd.]

[MUSIC UP: “The People That We Love” by Bush. The crowd boos loudly as Copycat makes his way to the ring, Aaron Jones following behind him.]

TF: His opponent, led to the ring by Aaron Jones…From Kalamazoo Michigan, weighing in at 280 pounds…COPYCAT!!

[The crowd keeps boo’ing as Copycat makes his way to the ring, a cold dead stare at Cruise as he walks up the ring steps.]

[MUSIC UP: “Master of Alchemy” by Electric Wizard. The crowd boos, but there are some cheers as Rezin walks towards the ring a sick smile on his face, like he’s got a plan nobody else knows about.]

DT: These are three truly devious and evil men entering the ring right now.

DM: This is like watching who would win in a fight between a lion, a python, and a jackal!

MN: Which one’s the lion?

DM: Which one do you THINK, Neels?

[SFX: *DING!-DING!*]

DT: There’s the bell, and all three men advance out of their respective corners and begin circling each other around the center of the ring! Who’s going to make the first move here?

DM: Who do you think is willing to take the risk, Dave? Wrestling two opponents isn’t like wrestling one.

DT: Here’s Rezin, stepping up to Cruise with a low sweep kick... but Cameron hopped out of range in the nick of time!

DM: And right into Copycat, who slaps Cruise into a side headlock! Here comes Rezin again... but Copycat bucks him a way with a sharp sidekick to the abdomen! And Cruise goes to the mat with a headlock takedown by the Cat!

MN: As expected, Cat’s getting off to a pretty good start.

DT: Copycat wrenches hard on Cruise’s head, but he releases and gets back to his feet as he sees Rezin coming for him again! Rezin with a HARD kick -- no, Copycat catches the leg!

DM: Rezin going for the ENZIGURI -- NO! Copycat was thinking a step ahead and released the leg at the perfect moment, and Rezin just SPLATTED on his face!

DT: Wait, Cruise with a SCHOOL BOY on Copycat from behind!

One...

Two...

And it’s broken up by Rezin!

MN: Copycat would have kicked out anyway...

DM: The action isn’t showing any signs of slowing yet! Rezin takes Cruise by the hair and pulls him off Copycat before putting a KNEE right into his temple! The referee warns him about the hair, but Rezin just tells him to back off!

DT: That man is completely unstable tonight! Rezin yanks Cruise to his feet and takes him by the arm... looking for a whip to the corner -- no, Cam reverses! Rezin sent sprinting into Copycat -- GOOD LORD, Cat with a BELLY-TO-BELLY SUPLEX tosses Rezin through the air and crashing into the turnbuckle pads!

DM: That should keep HIM down for a while, as Copycat turns his attention to Cameron Cruise! The former members of the Anthology now facing off!

MN: OH YEAH, BABY, THIS IS WHAT PEOPLE PAID TO SEE!!

DT: I think you’re the only person in this building stoked to see this, Mike... so please calm down. You’re spilling your coffee all over my papers. Back to the match now... Cat and Cruise crash together into a collar and elbow tie-up! Who’s the strongest of these two powerhouses?

DM: Skill is just as important as strength, Dave! Copycat ducks low and goes around for a rear waistlock! Could be going for the German Suplex... but wait, Cruise COUNTERS with a snapmare, and quickly follows through by slapping the Cat into a chinlock!

MN: Cameron Cruise may be the ONLY MAN IN EXISTENCE with the power to muzzle the jaws of the CAT!

DT: Copycat is trying to break free... he works his way up to his feet, all the while trying to break the grip of Cameron Cruise... and he DOES, and quickly takes Cruise’s arm around his back to put him a hammerlock!

DM: The tables have been turned on Cameron Cruise again... or have they? Cruise throwing some elbows back there with his free arm, and he lands one! Now Cruise with the reversal, and he draws Copycat by the arm into a Front Facelock!

DT: Cruise looking for a DDT... but Copycat bulls him into the corner before he can make a move! Speaking of what’s in the corner... looks like on the other side of the ring, Rezin is finally scraping himself up off the mat, but it looks like he’s still seeing stars!

MN: He doesn’t JUST see stars, Dave! He sees SUPERNOVAS and BLACK HOLES!

DT: Right, whatever... Copycat with some shoulder thrusts to the mid-section of Cameron Cruise, keeping him pinned in the corner! The referee is calling for the break, and Copycat draws him out of the corner... and now he sees Rezin staggering around in the other corner! Looks like he’s got something in mind!

DM: I think you’re right, Dave! Copycat takes Cruise by the arm... there’s the IRISH WHIP -- OH MAN, Cameron Cruise just BULLDOZED Rezin back to the mat with a running lariat!

DT: Probably not what Copycat intended, and now he comes charging after him with a double axe-handle -- NO!! He’s sent OVER THE ROPES to the outside with a Back Body Drop by Cruise!

MN: You really gotta admire that man’s ring awareness! Even with the situation looking bad, Cam always finds a way to take advantage!

DT: Got some brown stuff on your nose there, Neely... back in the ring, Cruise is alone with Rezin, who’s lying completely flat on his back! Cam’s not looking this gift horse in the mouth, he goes for the pin!

One!

Two!

Rezin kicks out!

DT: Cruise needs to keep the pressure on Rezin and he elevates the mad man…BACK SUPLEX!! Cruise into the cover!

One!

Two!

Copycat breaks it up!

DM: Copycat gets himself back into the match by preventing the win for Cruise there.

MN: You know none of these guys have any sympathy for each other and it’s going to be kill or be killed in that ring.

DT: Copycat now stomping away on Cruise. Rezin pulled to his feet and he catches a right hand…REZIN THROWN OVER THE TOP TO THE FLOOR!

DM: Eliminating one opponent from the match so you can focus on the other opponent, sound triple threat tactics from Copycat here.

DT: Cruise now sent to the ropes…BIG BOOT BY COPYCAT! THE COVER!!

One!

Two!

Cruise kicks out!

DT: Copycat now pulls Cruise to his feet…He’s setting him up for the Litterbomb…CRUISE IS UP!!! CRUISE GETS PLANTED!!! COPYCAT WITH THE COVER!!

One!

Two!

REZIN WITH A SLINGSHOT LEGDROP TO THE BACK OF COPYCAT’S NECK BREAKS IT UP!

DT: Rezin out of nowhere saves the match for himself.

MN: To hell with that, both Cruise and Copycat might be out cold, he could have won it right there!

DT: Rezin crawls over and covers Copycat!

One!

Two!

Copycat kicks out!

DT: Rezin now over to Cruise, he hooks the leg!

One!

Two!

Cruise gets a foot on the ropes!

DT: Rezin bangs the mat in frustration, both his opponents were at his mercy and he couldn’t get the win there.

DM: This has been a punishing match, and with all the damage his opponents had taken, you know Rezin thought he had victory in his hands.

MN: Maybe he’s just toying with them, this guy is barking mad, he could be relishing the chance to dish out more punishment.

DT: Rezin has Cruise back to his feet…CRUISE WITH A REALITY CHECK OUT OF NOWHERE!! All three men down, this is anyone’s game!

MN: No, it’s whoever can cover Rezin’s game that guy is out colder than a block of ice!

DT: It’s Copycat crawling over…Copycat is going to steal this!! HE COVERS!!

One!

Two!

REZIN GETS A SHOULDER UP!

DM: Copycat only draped an arm over Rezin’s chest for the pin and that lax a cover allowed Rezin to just barely beat the three count.

DT: Copycat and Cruise slowly getting to their feet. Now both men trading punches and Copycat staggering Cruise with rights…Cruise falls into the ropes…Copycat charges him…CRUISE PULLS THE ROPES DOWN!! COPYCAT SAILING TO THE FLOOR! Cruise now measuring Rezin as he gets to his feet…Rezin is up…CRUISE WITH A CLOTHESLINE! NO! REZIN DUCKS!! REZIN HOOKS CRUISE…REZIN HIT!! ASAI DDT!!! HE COVERS!!!

One!

Two!

Three!!

[Bell rings, MUSIC UP: “Master of Alchemy” by Electric Wizard]

TF: Here is your winner…REZIN!!

DT: A big win by Rezin overcoming, Cruise and Copycat to pick up the victory.

DM: The man bound and determined to destroy EPW makes a statement with a win here tonight on Aggression.

DT: We’ll be right back with more fans!
 

DBrunkGXW

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DIScovery

[Scene opens with a high back chair in the middle of Dan Ryan’s office. Dis’ lawyer and Dan Ryan are talking as Dis walks into the office.]

KAHN: And here my client is now.

DIS: [Voice distorted] This is the only camera filming?

RYAN: Yes it is, and I like the distortion, you sound like my kid when she talks into a fan.

DIS: Your quick wit is legendary, now shall we get to business?

RYAN: Yes, let’s do that. Sit down.

[Dis sits in the high backed chair. His body blocked from view of the camera.]

RYAN: Off with it.

[The Dis mask falls to the floor next to the chair.]

RYAN: Very funny.

DIS: It is funny isn’t it? We both know the Sad Prince would never have the nerve to pull off something as bold as this.

[An Impulse mask hits the floor.]

KAHN: This is my client. The real Dis sits before you and hopefully all this nonsense with Stalker will be ended.

RYAN: I have Stalker ready to call in to explain his actions.

[A TV monitor behind Ryan begins to flicker]

KAHN: What’s going on with that thing?

RYAN: What thing?

KAHN: This is a trap!

[Kahn walks in front of Dis so that he too is blocked by the chair. The monitor behind Ryan turns on revealing Stalker with a big grin on his face.]

STALKER: I just keep playing you like a harp, don’t I?

RYAN: You have thirty seconds, Reeves.

STALKER: I knew you wouldn’t trust your own eyes. Just remember, you never know what’s real and what’s not, Ryan. You don’t run this ship anymore. I do. Don’t forget that.

[Ryan flips the monitor off and the screen goes dark again. He sighs then turns back to Dis and Kahn.]

DIS: If you do not end his career at Russian Roulette the lunatic will still not be long for Empire Pro Wrestling.

For I will end his career.
 

DBrunkGXW

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Murphy Goes to Hollywood

[CUTTO: Announce position]

DT: Folks up next we’ll be going down to the ring for the World Tag Team Title match. The division has been hot lately and tonight Team Viagra gets their shot.

DM: It seems that the idea of putting some guys together to forge a good tag team crop has worked to an extent, and it’s certainly been awhile since we’ve had multiple legitimate tag team contenders in the hunt.

MN: I certainly hope TEAM VIAGRA can… get up… for this match.

DM: Good grief.

DT: Always with the witty repartee, eh Neels?

MN: Someone has to be funny out here.

DM: When does that guy get here?

MN: Oh, in about half an--HEY!!

DT: [chuckling] Before we go to the ring, I understand there’s something going on with the tag champs backstage. Let’s take a look at that…

[Camera fades in to The First and Eddie 'The Fire' Burns having a heated discussion backstage. They are standing in front of Dan Ryan's office, when from around the corner, James Murphy approaches. He looks panicked, tired and worrisome. His eyes light up when he catches the new tag champs in his sight. He immediately approaches them, thus interrupting their conversation.]

MURPHY: You guys seen Steven Shane?

BURNS: No, you need him to pick on you some more?

MURPHY: Well.. I mean.. I need to interview him before his big main event match tonight!

BURNS: You could just interview us before our soon to be successful tag title defense.

[The First glares at Eddie.]

MURPHY: You guys would let me do that?!?

FIRST: Look man, I get that Steven Shane exists only to beat you down, but not everyone in the locker room is a jerk who wants to put you down.

MURPHY: Okay where to start... uhhhh.... ummm....

[As James Murphy is fumbling for words, Dan Ryan's office door opens and Caitlyn Daymon emerges. She pauses at the doorway to say one last thing.]

CAITLYN: I am so glad you are doing this, Dan. You have no idea how much it means to me. When you fire him at Russian Roulette, I'll finally be able to rest at night.

[She closes the door and looks at the situation she just ran into.]

CAITLYN: Well well! Look at you James, scoring an interview with the Tag Team Champions!

MURPHY: Yes maam!

FIRST: Yeah, so, about the big interview you scored, you going to ask me and Eddie about our differences, our tactics for what we’re going to do against Team VIAGRA tonight, come on man, let’s hear it.

MURPHY: Man you’re kinda taking everything I was gonna say. What were you and Ryan talkin’ about Caitlyn?

BURNS: What? Where went our interview?

CAITLYN: I thanked Dan Ryan for ridding EPW of Stalker and that I’d be glad to give him the 25,000 dollars, but he said he didn’t care about that and was doing this for the good of the company.

BURNS: 25,000 dollars?! I’ll beat Stalker half dead for that kinda cake!

FIRST: Umm, he’s not going to be anywhere around us til Russian Roulette.

[Muse walks down the hall towards the group. Rocking huge sunglasses, blue hair, a white belly shirt and blue hot pants, she carries a gym bag over her shoulder, she looks confused by the mob.]

MUSE: What’s going on guys.

BURNS: Caitlyn is gonna ship me 25,000 clams if I put Stalker in a wheel chair! The only thing as good as being a champion is getting paid. Russian Roulette I’m gonna get paid baby!

[First gives Muse a head shake, which she returns.]

MUSE: Sounds…Wonderful, well I’m gonna get ready for the match, happy Stalker hunting!

FIRST: Yeah I’m going to join her, getting ready for our title defense and not worrying about trying to score a quick buck going after a psychopath.

[First and Muse walk away.]

BURNS: Can I get half up front?

CAITLYN: Yeah right…Good luck with your match, and your bounty collection.

[Caitlyn walks away.]

BURNS: The nerve of people…

[Looks at Murphy]

BURNS: What are YOU looking at?!

[Burns walks off, Murphy looks confused]

MURPHY: Ummm, back to you guys.
 

DBrunkGXW

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EPW World Tag Team Titles: Eddie Burns & The First (cc) vs. TEAM VIAGRA

[FADEIN: The ramp way where High Flyer and Tony Davis are making their ways to the ring as “I Hope You Die” by The Bloodhound Gang plays over the PA.]

TF: The following contest is for the EPW World Tag Team Titles! Introducing first weighing in at a total combined weight of 480 pounds, the team of High Flyer and Tony Davis…TEAM VIAGRA!!

[The crowd pops as Flyer and Davis walk towards ring and high five some fans along the way. They take separate routes to the ring and while Davis is chatting it up with some fans, Eddie 'The Fire' Burns hops the railing and blindsides High Flyer!]

DT: Oh my god! Eddie Burns is assaulting High Flyer before the match can even start!

MN: Glad to know someone knows what they are doing around here.

[Burns unstraps the tag title from around his waist and drives it directly into High Flyer's knee. The First comes charging down the ramp as Burns has the title high in the air again, but stops him from delivering a second blow. Tony Davis finally sees what's going on and charges over and slams The First with a clothesline. He lands hard against the railing and Eddie grapples Tony before Referee Paul Jones breaks it up. Tony Fatora exits the ring to get out of harms way as Eddie 'The Fire' Burns is led into the ring followed quickly by The First. Muse trails behind, but stays away from the altercation.]

DM: The First and his partner are having a heated conversation as Tony Davis is helping his partner get to his feet. High Flyer took a brutal hit to his already injury prone knee. I don't know for sure if he should be continuing this match.

MN: Fine by me, easy win for the new tag champs. I just wish The First would lay off his obviously superior partner. The Fire knows how to win matches, unlike The First who has to be handed his matches on a silver platter.

DT: Neely, The First is a former world champion!

MN: With an unsuccessful track record of defending said title.

DM: Regardless The First is right on the money. There is no reason to come out pre match and cheap shot your opponent, that's bad sportsmanship.

DT: Agreed Dean. Well looks like Jones has everything situated, High Flyer is saying he wants to compete so Davis agrees and heads in the ring to be the first one in. The First looks like he wants to be first in but is getting into an argument about it with his partner.

MN: Burns knows what he is doing, he needs to take the leadership of this team.

DM: First looks like he is relenting and takes the corner. Bell rings and we are off!

DT: Davis charges Burns with a set of furious punches to the face and gut. Ref warns him about closed fists and he backs away only for a second, before driving a knee straight to Burns gut!

DM: With him doubled over now, he irish whips him into the corner! Burns stumbles forward and is met by a stiff clothesline! He plants some boots to the face of Burns before leaning over and yelling in his face.

MN: What a crybaby. He's complaining about Burns taking the obvious upper hand move before the match began.

DT: It was a cheapshot, not everyone favors cheap shots Neely.

MN: Well they should.

DT: Davis has Burns up again, hooks him..... He has Burns hanging in the air! All of his blood must be rushing to his head by now.

*Crowd: Ooooooooh!*

DM: SUPLEXES him down!

MN: What are they Oooohing about?

DM: You wouldn't understand. Davis recovers and climbs atop Burns, hooks his leg...1.....2..NO! Burns kicks out!

DT: Davis looking to inflict more pain upon Burns is dragging him to his partner's corner. High Flyer still favoring his knee accepts the tag and enters the ring. They each grab an arm of Burns... pull him forward... DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE! Burns is decked!

MN: That's a clear cheap shot right there! Why aren't you getting on to them for that?

DM: It's team work, not cheating.

DT: Jones is ordering Davis out of the ring and he does so. Flyer hobbles slightly with Burns by his hair, he whips him into the ropes and Burns ducks a slow clothesline... bounces back and hits Flyer with a nice looking dropkick.

DM: First wants the tag in, but Burns doesn't seem to be listening. He's getting to his feet and Flyer is up to one knee now. Burns walks over with a hard fist that is blocked! Flyer punches Eddie in the gut and then follows it up with a European Uppercut! Burns stumbles backwards into his own corner and The First tags himself in!

DT: First and Flyer meet face to face in the ring, they hook up, Flyer gets the advantage, knees First in the gut. Hooks him, rolling DDT! However Flyer is real slow to capitalize and Davis is calling for the tag back in. Flyer agrees and hobbles over to tag his partner in.

MN: I think Burns needs to get back in the match he was in obvious control before The First came in.

DM: Not really.

DT: Davis comes in and lays a flurry of punches to The First as he is getting up... he whips First against the ropes... First slides under the bottom rope, hooks the top one.. WOW! SPRINGBOARD SPINNING WHEEL KICK out of nowhere!

DM: He quickly goes for the cover...1....2... NO! Davis strong arms First off of him. He struggles to get up but First is all over him, a set of kicks to the back of his head has him back down on the mat... First runs against the ropes... Springboard Moonsault!

*CROWD: POP!*

DT: He hooks the legs of Davis again... 1....2...NO! He has the clear advantage right now in this match, as those two high flying attacks have taken their toll on Davis.

MN: TAG BURNS IN! TAG BURNS IN! TAG BURNS IN!

[Neely stands up chanting that and tries to get the fans into it but they just stare at him awkwardly.]

DM: Sit down Neely!

DT: First has Davis in the corner... hooks his arm.. IRISH WHIP.. REVERSED! First goes flying into the corner... Davis CHARGES IN.... MISSES a clothesline! First side stepped him.. Tony turns around and is nailed by a hard dropkick! Davis slumps into the corner.

DM: Using all of his strength, The First wills Tony Davis atop the top turnbuckle... oh man.. looks like he's going to finish him off... TOP ROPE FRANKENSTEI...! NO!! DAVIS IS holding on.. First is dangling.. Davis pulls him up... JUMPS! TOP ROPE POWERBOMB!

*CROWD: POP*

DT: Both men are motionless in the ring now.

MN: Perfect time for Burns to get in there!

DM: High Flyer and Eddie Burns are both screaming for their partners to get up. Davis is slowly starting to stir... and he starts crawling.... First is shaking the cobwebs out of his head and is also crawling... it's a race to the tag!

DT: Davis reaches out! TAG! Here comes HIGH FLYER!

MN: First with the TAG! Burns is in! Burns is in!

DT: They charge each other in the middle of the ring... Chop from Flyer! Fist from Burns! Left from Flyer! Right from Burns! Neither man is giving in! They are wailing away at each other in the center of the ring.

DM: Flyer blocks a punch.. and another! He hooks Burns.. Burns slides behind Flyer.. hooks him.. RELEASE GERMAN SUPLEX!

*CROWD: Boos!*

MN: Why are they booing Burns but they don't boo his partner?

DM: Because The First is a stand up individual, Eddie is not.

MN: Define stand up individual.

DM: Not enough time to explain that to you.

DT: Burns back on his feet now walks over to High Flyer he grabs a hold of the wounded leg, spins Flyer on to his stomach. Half leg Boston Crab! He is really wrenching that leg and Flyer is in agony..

DM: BURNS grabs the ROPES for leverage! He's wrenching it even harder now! Paul Jones looks up from checking on Flyer and Burns let's go of the ropes!

MN: LOOK AT FIRST! He's yelling at the ref and ratting out his own teammate! What the hell is that about!??

DT: Obviously The First wants to defend these titles in a legit manner.

DM: Well Burns has a hold of the ropes again and both Tony Davis and The First have seen enough! Paul Jones catches Burns and warns him to let go! Burns releases the hold and Paul Jones is dealing with an upset Tony Davis now.

MN: The First is all up in his partner's face and Burns is yelling right back at him!

DM: This team is far too dysfunctional they are never going to last as tag champs.

DT: Davis finally gets back to his corner and now Jones is forcing The First back to his! Eddie Burns charges over to Davis' corner... FIRE! He just blew fire in Tony Davis' face! Davis falls off the ring apron and is screaming in pain.

DM: Flyer up to his feet now and trying to regain his senses... he turns around... FIRE in High Flyer's face!!! Oh my god what a cheating bastard! Jones isn't seeing any of this and The First can't believe his eyes!

DT: Jones turns around and Eddie Burns nails High Flyer with the BURN OUT! He hooks Flyer's leg... 1.....2......3!!!!!

MN: WOOOOO!! Awesome win by the new tag champs and yet again, Eddie Burns having to carry this team on his back.

DM: He cheated his way to victory again... but I have to ask how long can this team remain together? They certainly don't see eye to eye.

DT: Only time will tell Dean.

[Fade to commercials as Eddie 'The Fire' Burns is celebrating hard in the ring, while his partner The First is shaking his head in disgust on the outside.]
 

DBrunkGXW

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Dirty Rotten Shane

[A cut to a backstage hallway shows officials and trainers surrounding someone lying on the ground. As the camera moves closer, we can see the downed individual is Steven Shane, who grimaces in pain as he holds an injured knee. As the trainers try to attend to Shane, Lesbian Siegel pushes her way through the crowd]

Lesbian Siegel: What’s going on? What happened to him?

Official: Someone sneaked up on him and hit him in the knee with a crowbar. We’re trying to figure out if he’ll be able to compete tonight.

LS: Who was it? One of his opponents?

Official: Not sure. Whoever it was came from behind. I don’t think he saw them.

LS: Then how do you know it was a crowbar?

Official: It’s right—

[He pauses]

Official: It was right next to him on the ground. It was here a minute ago.

Voice from Offscreen: Is this what you’re looking for?

[As Siegel turns to look in the direction of the voice, the camera pans with her to show Aaron Jones a short distance away from the commotion. Jones is holding a crowbar, patting it against the palm of his free hand. Siegel approaches Jones and glares at him]

LS: So you’re responsible for this?

AJ: Me? You should know better than to think I could do this much damage to someone like Steven Shane, even with a weapon. He’d already be up and limping by now.

LS: You know what I mean. Is this Copycat’s doing? What does he have to gain from attacking Steven Shane?

AJ: Look, these days, I don’t know any more about his true intentions than you do. But I can’t say I’m surprised. You should have known he would react badly to what you and the rest of EPW management did to him.

LS: What do you mean by that?

AJ: Don’t act so confused! You know what I’m talking about. All he has wanted for months is a chance to square things up with Larry Tact, and tonight, he gets the news that Tact won’t be at Russian Roulette. You deprived a very dangerous man of the one simple thing that he wanted, and now Steven Shane has paid the price for your actions.

LS: What did you expect us to do? Tact hasn’t been showing up. We can’t give Copycat a match if we can’t reach his opponent. This was completely unnecessary, and now it’s putting the main event of tonight’s show in jeopardy – maybe even the Intercontinental Title match at Russian Roulette!

AJ: Your excuses aren’t going to placate him any more than they’re going to mend Steven Shane’s knee. I can’t predict what he’s going to do next, but based on what I know about him, let me give you some advice: If you don’t want more people to be needlessly hurt, the best thing you can do is fix this. Think about it.

[Jones abruptly brings the crowbar up vertically, holding it between his face and Siegel’s, causing her to jump backward instinctively. Jones slowly holds the crowbar out to her, and after a second of hesitation, she snatches it out of his hand. Jones walks away, Siegel glaring after him as he goes]
 

DBrunkGXW

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How it BURNS

[FADEIN: A hallway in the backstage area, Eddie Burns, The First and Muse are in mid argument.]

BURNS: I don’t know exactly why the two of you got a stick up your asses about the things I do, but what I’m here to do is WIN! I got this belt and I’m keeping it and I’m tired of having to explain myself!

FIRST: Well let me explain something to you Eddie, no matter how hard you try, no matter what rules you break or tactics you use…No matter how tightly you cling to that belt…You’re going to lose it, that’s what happens to champions Eddie, they lose their titles…It’s inevitable…

BURNS: Maybe it is for you because you’re such a damn screw up!

FIRST: No it’s the way of the world Eddie, we’re going to lose these titles, and then after we’ve lost them, all that will be left of our time with them will be our legacy…And it’s a legacy of you being a gutless worm who’s doing anything and everything to devalue these titles…You’re pathetic and maybe one day you’ll see it…And I’m done with it…Russian Roulette, you better fight straight up when we defend these titles, because I’m not going to carry you or support what you’re doing anymore…You cheat even a little, and I’ll hop off that apron and walk to the back, and we’ll see how long you keep the gold that way…Champ…

[First and Muse walk away from Eddie, Eddie glaring at them in a rage.]

EDDIE: You can’t do this to me…This is my title…I’m not losing it…I’M NOT LOSING IT!

[Eddie walks off camera in the opposite direction, FADEOUT]
 

DBrunkGXW

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MAIN EVENT: Anarky (c), Impulse (c) & Adrian Willard (c) vs. Dis, Shane & Mahogany

[FADEIN: Tony Fatora standing in the middle of the ring.]

TF: The following contest is a six man tag team match set for one fall and it is the MAIN EVENT of the evening!

[MUSIC UP: “Power” by Kanye West, the crowd gives a mixed reaction as Steven Shane limps through the curtain and slowly makes his way towards the ring. Shane has on black trunks and ring boots, the leg he’s favoring covered in wrappings.]

TF: Coming to the ring from Hollywood Florida, weighing in at 231 pounds…”SENSATIONAL!” STEVEN! SHANE!!

DT: Steven Shane has NOT been cleared by EPW’s medical staff but he has DEMANDED to fight in tonight’s main event in spite of what may be a severe knee injury.

DM: Shane’s had just about everyone in this six man talk trash about him, I’m sure he’s itching to get into that ring to show what he can do.

MN: Which is nothing! He’s hobbled, he’s putting Rich Mahogany and Dis at an extreme disadvantage by taking up this spot on their team, they should be allowed to find a replacement!

[Shane enters the ring and after a beat MUSIC UP: “Love Man” by Otis Redding and the crowd boos loud! Rich Mahogany makes his way to the ring wearing a sparkling pull apart tux, black bow-tie, sunglasses and flip flops. Rich smiles gleefully as the crowd continues to jeer him as he walks towards the ring.]

TF: And his partner from Austin, Texas weighing in at 210 pounds…RICH!!! MAHOGANY!!!

MN: Give it up! Give it up for the uncrowned EPW World Heavyweight Champion!

DT: It was a non-title match he won Neely, and one that was full of controversy.

MN: It was a win over the champ as far as I’m concerned that’s where the gold should be, around the waist of the most exciting man EPW’s seen in quite some time.

[Mahogany instead of hitting the ring stops at ringside and starts chatting up a pretty woman in the front row. Mahogany rips off his tux to reveal an all-too-revealing black speedo for his ring gear which seems to impress the lady.]

DT: Mahogany doesn’t seem to focused on the task at hand here.

MN: I’d say he’s very focused, it’s always a good time to find your lady for the evening!

[MUSIC UP: “Seven Nation Army” by The White Stripes and the crowd goes back to boo’ing loudly as Dis appears on the top of the rampway. Dis body covered in a flowing black cape, head covered in a black mask as he walks to the ring.]

TF: And their partner, hailing from Parts Unknown, Weight Unknown…DIS!!

DT: And now the mystery man who has proven to Dan Ryan that he’s not Stalker and the man who is set to fight for the EPW World Title at Russian Roulette makes his way to the ring.

DM: Dis has claimed to EPW needs glory and honor and that he’ll bring it back but really with his back jumping antics and his questionable tactics to secure a title shot, I don’t see an honorable bone in Dis body.

MN: The only bone I know about is the one in Joey Melton’s arm that Dis broke tonight, whoever it is this person means business!

[Dis also doesn’t enter the ring and instead waits on the outside of the ring on the side opposite the rampway.]
[MUSIC UP: “Genesis” by Justice. The crowd pops as Adrian Willard stands at the top of the rampway. Willard in long white tights with “Willard” on the seat in black. Willard takes the EPW World TV Title and holds it above his head and walks to the ring as fans slap him on the arms and back.]

TF: And their opponents…Hailing from Chicago, Illinois weighing in at 285 pounds…He is the EPW World Television Champion…ADRIAN!! WILLARD!!

DT: The newly crowned TV Champion makes his way to the ring as the crowd is on their feet. Adrian Willard of a dramatic trilogy of battles with Cameron Cruise is now the Television Champion.

MN: Just a bump in the road for Cruise, he’ll be back in the hunt for gold in short order, just you watch. This kid will flame out.

[Willard hits the ring. Steven Shane seeing the lack of assistance from his team mates joins them on the floor.]

[MUSIC UP: “Revolution Baby” by Queen V. The crowd pops loud as Impulse and Calico Rose make their way through the curtain. Impulse has on an Ice Tre T-Shirt under his leather jacket, black long tights with a red grid along the sides. His hands taped up with JFZ written on the back. The EPW Intercontinental Championship over his shoulder. Rose by his side wearing a deep emerald green slip dress and matching pumps.]

TF: And his partner led to the ring by Calico Rose….Hailing from New York, New York, weighing in at 188 pounds, the EPW Intercontinental Champion….IM!!! PULSE!!!

DT: Impulse bringing the crowd to their feet as he makes his way to the ring, you have to wonder what he’s thinking about the actions of Copycat tonight and the attack on Steven Shane.

DM: It seemed like Shane and Impulse were going to meet at Russian Roulette, but tonight’s had things take an unexpected turn as now Shane’s nursing a bad knee and we don’t even know if he should be in the ring tonight.

MN: I don’t care what Impulse is doing, I just hope Copycat hurts him whenever it happens, I’m tired of this guy and he needs to catch a beating.

[MUSIC UP: “More Human Than Human” by White Zombie and the crowd gets loud again as Anarky stands on top of the ramp. Anarky wearing a torn on jeans, a tattered leather shirt with the anarchy symbol on it. The EPW World Title strapped around Anarky’s waist as he makes his way to the ring, Anarky glaring daggers at the ring as he walks down the ramp.]

TF: And their partner, from Hartford, Connecticut weighing in at 231 pounds, the EPW World Heavyweight Champion!!! AN!!! ARRRR!!! KEY!!!!

MN: All hail your fake champion! Yeah that’s right, cheer the man who was beaten soundly on our last show.

DT: It was non-title Neely and it was a total disgrace of a result, and the EPW World Champion is here and I think Rich Mahogany, Dis, and Steven Shane are in for a long night because Anarky means business!

DM: You can just see the determination on Anarky’s face as he makes his way to the ring, I sure as hell wouldn’t want to get in his way!

[Anarky hits the ring and the three champions stand in the middle of the ring for a few moments before Willard and Impulse walk to the corners facing the hard camera and stand on the second rope, holding their belts in the air, Anarky turns to face the hard camera and raises his belt over his head as well.]

DT: The three singles champions of EPW have taken over the ring and this crowd is deafening. This huge six man tag now mere moments from starting, as the champions hand their belts over to Pat Jones, while the Dis and Shane are looking into the ring while Rich Mahogany is still chatting up that lady.

DM: The solidarity of the champion is a stark contrast to the apparent disarray of the challengers, one would think they’ll have to get on the same page if they don’t want to get beaten badly here tonight.

[Bell rings]

DT: Willard looks to be starting for his team, meanwhile on the outside Shane looks at Dis who isn’t looking back at him, Shane now looking at Rich who’s talking to that woman still and now Shane hops onto the apron and now gets into the ring. It’s Steven Shane against Adrian Willard to start this off. Willard bull rushes Shane into the corner…Now he grabs Shane LAUNCHES HIM across the ring with a HIP TOSS!

DM: Shane landed where his partners would be, if either one of them would bother getting on the apron.

MN: It’s still early, I’m sure they have a plan.

DT: Shane gets back to his feet and looks down at Dis. Willard grabs Shane and SLAMS him to the mat. Willard putting the boots to Shane and now gets him back up, Willard with an arm bar and now he tags in Impulse. Impulse with a chop to the chest, [Woo!] and another chop! He grabs the wrist and twists, flipping Shane to the mat. Impulse now scoops up Shane and flips him to the mat with a Fireman’s Carry style throw…Impulse with a quick cover.

ONE!

TWO!

NO!

DT: Shane kicks out at two and continues this match.

DM: That pin attempt seems to have woke up Dis and Mahogany as both men have now climbed onto the apron in their corner, maybe we’ll get a match out of these guys yet.

DT: Shane scoots over to his corner and gets the tag to Mahogany and Rich now circles Impulse. The two lock up and Rich backs Impulse into a corner, the ref calling for a clean break and he’s not going to get it, Pat Jones pushing the two men apart…Mahogany shoots a thumb to the eye while Jones was busy separating them. Mahogany now landing knees to the body and he pulls Impulse to his feet and SLAMS him to the mat…

DM: Typical actions of Mahogany taking a shortcut to get an advantage over his opponent.

MN: You know what I call it? Effective, the man is undefeated and for good reason.

DT: Mahogany now sends Impulse into the ropes, Impulse ducks a clothesline…CATCHES MAHOGANY WITH A CLOTHESLINE ON THE WAY BACK! Impulse runs through him again with ANOTHER CLOTHESLINE and now Impulse makes the tag to the champion…HERE COMES ANARKY!

DM: You know Anarky’s wanted to get ahold of Mahogany since the controversial finish of the last aggression and now he’s got his chance.

MN: Sure Anarky takes the tag when Mahogany is down, cheap shot artist that our world champ is!

DT: Mahogany pulled to his feet and Anarky peppering him with rights and lefts, Mahogany bails out to the floor [boos!] but Anarky’s not going to be held back and chases after him and catches him on the floor…MAHOGANY THROWN INTO THE RAILING! Anarky kicking away at Mahogany and he falls to the floor…Anarky throws him back into the ring and DRIVES an elbow into the chest, a cover!

ONE!!

TWO!!

NO!!

DT: Mahogany quickly scampers back to his corner and tags in Steven Shane again, Shane in and Anarky DECKS him with a right hand, Anarky just VICIOUSLY stomping the head of Shane and now he tags Willard back into the ring…Willard grabs Shane and sends him into the corner…Shane staggers out into a BIG BOOT! Shane down and out on the mat…Willard grabs him…THROWS HIM OVER THE TOP TO THE FLOOR!

DM: The champions have been nothing short of dominate in this match, and Steven Shane has suffered quite a beating at the hands of these men.

DT: Willard now sees Shane’s gotten to his feet…WILLARD OFF THE ROPES…NO HANDS PLANCHA TO THE FLOOR!!! THAT WAS INSANE!!! [“Holy sh*t” chant!]

MN: I can’t believe the big lug could get airborn like that…He may have killed himself doing that stunt.

DT: Both men down…OH COME ON! Mahogany and Dis now jump off the apron and put the boots to Willard…impulse and Anarky over and now we got total chaos as this match has completely broken down. Pat Jones trying to pry these six men away from each other…MAHOGANY DROPS A KNEE INTO THE GROIN OF WILLARD!! WHAT A CHEAP SHOT!!

DM: Mahogany using the brawl to use a tactic that would have gotten him disqualified had the ref seen it and Willard is writhing on the floor in agony.

MN: This man is a genius! Rich Mahogany is fast becoming my favorite wrestler in this company.

DT: Willard shoved into the ring by Mahogany as impulse and Anarky are being sent back to their corner, Shane gets into the ring and now he tags in Dis. Dis stomping away on the fallen Willard and now DRIVES a knee into his head, and ANOTHER ONE.

DM: Dis waiting until he’s got a weakened opponent before making his presence felt in this match.

MN: Same as Anarky and yet I didn’t hear you calling out the champ for it. Typical hypocrites you two are.

DT: Dis now backs off and measures Willard…WAIT! HE TURNS AROUND AND SUCKER PUNCHES ANARKY! Anarky trying to get into the ring and now all three members of the challengers team beating the heck out of Willard!

MN: Ha! Dis playing the champ like a fiddle!

DT: Now it’s Mahogany in the ring beating down Willard, there was no tag ref! Pat Jones losing control of this match, Mahogany now grabs Willard…GETS THE BIG MAN UP AND HITS THE CROTCH ROCKET CRADLE PILEDRIVER!! THE COVER!!

ONE!!

TWO!!

NO!!

DT: Mahogany looks disgusted at the ref as he thought that was a three count. Mahogany now grabs Willard and sends him into the corner…WILLARD CHARGES OUT WITH A CLOTHESLINE!! BOTH MEN DOWN!!

DM: Willard needs to make the tag, he’s been the victim of many double teams and illegal moves and really needs to get a break from the attack he’s been suffering.

MN: Come on Rich, make the tag and keep the pressure on this clown!

DT: The Ladies Man crawling over…Makes the tag to Shane…WILLARD TAGS IN IMPULSE!!! [Pop!] Impulse UNLOADING ON SHANE WITH CHOPS! Shane stumbles…BIG DROPKICK BY IMPULSE! The Marathon Man putting a beating on Shane…Shane sent into the corner and he stumbles out…INTO A BULLDOG!! Impulse now quickly sets up in the corner, he’s waiting on Shane to get to his feet…Shane is up…SUDDEN IMPACT!!! THAT’S THE MATCH RIGHT THERE!!! IMPULSE WITH THE COVER!!!

ONE!!

TWO!!

THR—

DT: DIS BREAKS IT UP WITH A KNEE TO THE BACK OF IMPULSE’S NECK!! Anarky charges into the ring and Pat Jones keeping him back, Impulse might be knocked out by that shot!

DM: Impulse suffered a broken neck earlier in his career, and Dis clearly exploiting that with a vicious knee right to the damaged neck of the Intercontinental Champion.

DT: Dis now dragging Shane to his corner. Dis tags himself in and he continues to stomp the neck of Impulse…Now he’s got Impulse’s head in a neck vise…The masked man wrenching away on the head of The Marathon Man and from Dis’ actions early tonight we know for sure that this is a person completely without mercy.

DM: The attack on Joey Melton was unprovoked and crossed just about every line in this industry if he broke Joey Melton’s arm one has to worry about how far he’ll go with this hold on Impulse.

MN: I ain’t worried about it! Put him in a wheel chair Dis!

DT: impulse fights to his feet…He spins into Dis…SNAP SUPLEX BY IMPULSE!! BOTH MEN DOWN!!

DM: Impulse countering Dis and now he’s looking for a tag.

DT: Stop him Dis, stop him AND BREAK HIS NECK!

DT: Dis tags in Mahogany…IMPULSE…IS STOPPED!! MAHOGANY PULLS HIM BACK INTO THE MIDDLE OF THE RING! Mahogany spreads Impulse’s legs…STOMP TO THE GUT!

DM: The lower gut!

MN: Pat Jones said it was clean, that’s what matters!

DT: Mahogany now grabs Impulse and puts him in a sitting position…SEX PANTHER STUMP PULLER!! The Ladies Man wrenching away on the leg…And ugh…He’s thrusting his groin into the back of Impulse’s head!

MN: He’s just trying to put some extra leverage on the hold.

DM: More like extra humiliation. Mahogany disrespecting Impulse in the crudest way possible..

DT: Impulse trying to fight the hold…HE ROLLS THROUGH AND HAS RICH IN A CRADLE! RICH IS PINNED!!

ONE!!

TWO!!

NO!!

DT: And Mahogany quickly tags Steven Shane back in…Shane kicking away on Impulse…Mahogany drops off the apron and he’s back chatting up that woman at ringside. [MAHOGANY: “You see me kick that idiot’s ass? Nobody’s a challenge for The Ladies Man babe!]

DM: Impulse is a threat no matter what, how can Mahogany be so confident?

MN: Cause he knows he’s better than everyone else, this thing is in the bag, and that lady will be in the sack!

DT: Shane now grabs impulse…BACK SUPLEX! Dumping Impulse on his neck again…Shane with a cover!!

ONE!!

TWO!!

NO!!

DT: Shane slowly back to his feet, he barely got Impulse up with that bum knee he’s been fighting this whole match on…Impulse pushes off Shane…SUDDEN IMPACT!!! OUT OF NOWHERE IMPULSE HIT THAT KICK AND HE KNOCKED SHANE OUT AGAIN!!

DM: Impulse laying in the ring in no-man’s-land, he could go for the cover or a tag.

MN: Dammit Shane, you’re blowing this for Mahogany…And not the way that lady will be either!

DT: You need to stop Neely…And Mahogany doesn’t seem to notice or care that Shane’s out in the ring…impulse now crawling to his corner…Shane slowly stirring and moving to his corner, he fell a lot closer to his side of the ring than Impulse did to his side…Dis gets the tag….ANARKY GETS THE TAG!!! ANARKY ALL OVER DIS WITH RIGHTS AND LEFTS!!

DM: The main event of Russian Roulette, we’re getting a preview and the champ is all over his challenger!

DT: Dis being beaten silly…Dis sent to the ropes…FOREARM TO THE HEAD! Dis hits the mat like a stone…Anarky pulls Dis to his feet…INVERTED DDT! THE COVER!!

ONE!!

TWO!!

NO!!

DT: Dis kicks out, and he quickly rushes to his corner and tags in Shane…HE THROWS STEVEN SHANE INTO THE RING! Dis bailing to the floor as Anarky now stomping away on Shane…Shane thrown to the ropes…HUGE SPINEBUSTER!!

DM: Shane left to fend for himself as Dis has bailed out…And now Mahogany is leaving through the crowd with that woman!

MN: Look, it’s not Rich’s fault Shane screwed this thing up…And besides no matter what happens in that ring currently, we all know Mahogany’s the real winner tonight.

DT: Anarky grabs Shane…CHAOS BREAKER!!! SHANE IS OUT!!

ONE!!

TWO!!

THREE!!

[Big pop! Bell rings. MUSIC UP: “More Human Than Human” by White Zombie]

TF: The winners of this bout…ADRIAN WILLARD!! IMPULSE!! AND ANNNNARKY!!!

DT: Anarky’s not done with Shane, he pulls him to his feet…ANOTHER CHAOS BREAKER!! Anarky glaring at Dis who’s standing outside the ring…Anarky waving Dis into the ring…Dis refusing…Anarky now pointing to the fallen body of Steven Shane…He pulls Shane back up to his feet again…ANOTHER CHAOS BREAKER!!

DM: Anarky sending a message to Dis and Steven Shane is the one paying the price for it!

DT: Anarky stomping around the ring daring anyone to get into the ring with him…Anarky gets his belt from Pat Jones and he drops the belt in the middle of the ring. [ANARKY: “Come on you big talkers! Get in the ring! Get in here and let’s see what you got!”

DM: Anarky claiming the ring for himself and he’s defying anyone to try to stand up to him! And Dis doesn’t seem too eager to get in there, what’s the masked man going to do when Russian Roulette comes and there’s no one to hide behind and he has to confront an angry EPW World Champion?!

DT: Well see if he can man up come Russian Roulette, but tonight that ring and the title are Anarky’s, for Dean Martin and Mike Neely, I’m Dave Thomas saying good-bye everyone…Woah, wait a second!

[Dis jumps on the broadcast table and points at Anarky, who responds by waving Dis into the ring, the camera shoots from behind Dis showing Anarky motioning towards Dis…FADE TO COPYRIGHT.]
 

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If you want to help grow the community of fantasy wrestling creators, consider hosting your league here on FW. You gain access to message boards, Discord, your own web space and the ability to post pages here on FW. To discuss, message "Chad" here on FW Central.

What Is FW?

Take a look at some old articles that are still relevant regarding what fantasy wrestling is and where it came from.
  • Link: "What is FW?"
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