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AGGRESSION 18: Memphis, TN - 7/8/05

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DBrunkGXW

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[CUE UP: "Imperial March" - Rage Against the Machine. A video montage plays, featuring smoke-wreathed images of various wrestlers, some of them leaving blurred trails as they move.
CUT TO: Beast nailing the Absolution on Adam Benjamin.

CUT TO: Karl Brown coming off the ropes with a Quebrada.

CUT TO: Christian Sands and Lindsay Troy standing victorious in the ring.

CUT TO: Troy Douglas standing victorious on a turnbuckle.

CUT TO: Adam Benjamin delivering a Shining Wizard to Karl Brown.

CUT TO: Golem cradling his claw, smirking.

CUT TO: Boogie Smallz lighting up a blunt.

CUT TO: Lindsay Troy dropkicking Christian Sands.

CUT TO: JA and Sebastian Dodd locking up in the middle of the ring.

CUT TO: Dan Ryan sitting sedately in a chair, staring into the camera.

CUTTO: With a clash of metal, a logo slams across the screen, its edges flickering.]



(Cut to the ramp, where a wreath of pyro explodes around the EmpireTron and several bomblike, smoky explosions ripple about the entry way. The camera zooms in on the screen as the pyro finally peters out, then blurs to roving shots of the roaring crowd as a small banner in the corner briefly appears to proclaim that EPW is broadcast en Espanol. Various signs are visible in the crowd: "Marx fears the Queen, "Savoy is my baby daddy!!", "We Want the Dragon", "Crazy Like a Foxx!!", "JA-holic" with an arrow pointing down, "DIS FEARS CROSS!", "Unleash the BEAST!!", and finally, "Where’s Freeman?".)

[Cut to the announce table at ringside.]

DT: Welcome everyone to the FedEx Forum in Memphis, Tennesee!!! This is Aggression 18 and boy what a packed lineup we have tonight!! The pool of entrants in the Television Title picture will be explored a little tonight as Damian Stone takes on X-Ecutioner and Jason Payne takes on Priest.

DM: We’re talking about some guys that are either new or going in new directions and it’ll be very important that they make their statements tonight in order to gain some momentum headed for the big showdown on pay-per-view.

DT: In addition to that, Cross will take on Troy Douglas tonight in a bit of a return match for Douglas after a stint away.

DM: Oh how the mighty have fallen. Troy Douglas was once wrestling for the biggest prize in our sport. Tonight he’ll be lucky to get out of the ring alive, especially if Cross is holding on to some of the frustrations of his dealings with these Dis characters.

DT: Speaking of Dis…the mysterious Dis 2 will take on Lindsay Troy, the World Heavyweight Champion but in a non-title contest.

DM: Good call by Dan Ryan. This guy’s done nothing to earn a World Title
shot, but these two definitely have some issues to iron out.

DT: There’s much much more where that came from. We’ll have the Windham Entourage taking on Steve Savoy’s Posse, Steve Savoy himself will take on Joey Melton, Beast takes on the returning Adam Benjamin and of course the EPW Intercontinental Title will be on the line as Sebastian Dodd defends against the inimitable Cameron Cruise.

DM: Cammy’s gonna get his chance to shine tonight, Thomas. Here’s his moment in the sun.

DT: Last but not least, a young lady who has made some waves with her promotional pieces on previous shows but has yet to make her appearance in-ring, the one and only Foxx….will debut against Mojo Massey.

MN: Hell yes!

< DT: Now you speak up.

MN: I’ve been waiting all week for this.

DT: Well I’m excited myself, guys. We’re finally going to see her in-ring debut and it’s coming up first!

MN: Dave, you’re just excited to see another pair of tit…

DT: Family show!

MN: …tillating legs walking out from the back on a female.

DM: Nice save there, Neels.

MN: Thanks.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Mojo Massey vs. Foxx

TF: Already in the ring, let me introduce to you tonight, MOJO MASSSEEEEYYYY!

MN: Man, poor Mojo, he doesn’t get his hometown or his weight mentioned.

DM: Well, that’s what happens when you’re a jobber, Neels. No one loves you.

MN: Hey, fourth wall! And I happen to love Mojo!

TF: And his opponent…

(Cue up “Angelwitch.” Enter Foxx.)/p> TF: …from San Antonio, Texas, weighing in at 134 pounds… FOOXXXXX!

DT: Quite the warm reception for Ms. Foxx, don’t you think?

DM: Yeah, not only is she hot, but she seems likable too. A girl you can take home to mom.

MN: No way I’d ever take her home to mom. She might be able to kick my ass. That’s not cool.

DM: Alright Carlito…

MN: Hey! That’s not fair! Besides, I have way better hair than he does.

DM: Neels, no one cares about your hair.

DT: Alright, it’s time for the match to start guys.

(DING DING DING)

DT: And Mojo Massey wasting no time! Right in with a lariat! Cover…

...one…

…but Foxx kicks out.

DM: Well, looks like Mojo is getting desperate for his first win… or just to knock her out so he can get laid.

MN: Hey, hasn’t he ever heard of roofies?

DM: Probably, but jobbers don’t make enough to afford them.

DT: Guys, let’s get back to the match, and Mojo has Foxx up… Irish whip, Mojo with another lariat, no, Foxx ducks and counters with the crucifix takedown! What a move!

DM: She’s spry, that Foxx.

DT: Foxx up, and so’s Mojo, Foxx right behind him… TIGER SUPLEX! Bridge… …one…

…two…

…but Mojo kicks out!

DM: I think Mojo’s about to remember his role in this match.

MN: Hey, I still think he has some fight left in him.

DT: Foxx pulls Mojo to his feet, Irish whip, no, reversal…

MN: See, I told you…

DT: Foxx on the rebound and… LEG LARIAT right across the chest of Mojo. Foxx covers…

…one…

…two…

…Mojo kicks out!

DM: Well, he’s almost putting up a fight by kicking out.

MN: Shut up Dean.

DT: Foxx dragging Mojo closer to the corner now… she’s going to the top…

DM: This could be good, guys.

DT: Foxx’s up on the top, she’s facing the crowd. Now she leaps back… OH MY LORD, DID YOU SEE THAT MOVE?

DM: I just saw Neels’ jaw drop there.

DT: I think that’s what she calls the Vixen Dive! Cover…

…one…

…two…

….THREE!!

(DING DING DING)

TF: Your winner… FFFOOOOXXXXXXX!!!

MN: (wiping tears from his eyes) I don’t think I’ve seen anything so wonderful in my whole life.

DT: Get a room, Neely.

MN: (leaping to attention) Think she’d go for it??

DT: I meant for you and your hand.

(Dean snickers) MN: (sitting back down, deflated) Nice.

DM: Yeah Dave, it’s about time you came up with a zinger.

DT: I don’t know whether to be flattered or insulted at that, but regardless, it’s time for our first commercial break of the evening. Don’t go away!

(Cue up a commercial Anglo Luchador Brand® Fake Vomit.)
 

DBrunkGXW

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DT: Welcome back to Aggression everyone, and...

(Cue up "Eat the Rich." Enter JA and Lollipop.)

MN: What the hell? I thought he was off for the show? Man, I was just looking forward to not seeing his face.

DM: You don’t see his face, Neels. He’s always wearing a lucha mask.

MN: You know what I meant.

DT: Guys, guys, settle down.

(JA hops on the apron and holds the ropes open for Lollipop. Lolli enters, and JA follows. JA calls for a mic and Tony Fatora hands one to him.)

DT: I’m interested in seeing what he has to say.

MN: Maybe he’ll reveal that Lollipop was pleased by a real man when she was in Savoy’s captivity.

DM: Somehow, I highly doubt that or else she wouldn’t have gone back to JA.

DT: Well, this is wrestling guys, you know goofy things like that happen all the time.

MN: Fourth wall, Dave. What’d I tell you about the fourth wall??

DT: What’s that?

DM and MN: sigh

(JA taps on the microphone and puts it to his mouth.)

JA: Good evening everyone.

(Pop.)

JA: As you can see, I’m not in the highest of spirits right now, and that is because I’m still in shock of what that bottom-feeding, no goodnik, transvestite hooker who may or may not have the gum disease known as gingivitis did to my girlfriend here.

MN: Yeah, he should be in poor spirits after being shown up in the bedroom.

DM: Hush you bottom-feeding, no goodnik transvestite hooker who may or may not have the gum disease known as gingivitis.

MN: Stop stealing material from lame people!

JA: But, since I wasn’t there, and since my Lollipop is a very strong young woman, I’m going to let her tell the whole world what happened.

(JA hands the microphone off to Lollipop.)

LOLLIPOP: Like, thanks babe.

(Clears throat)

LOLLIPOP: Like...


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Cue up "Watching the Wheels," and enter Ron Artest with a microphone in hand.)

MN: Oh yeah! This ought to be good!

RA: Hey, hey, hey, cut the bullshizzle and let me shed some light on the truth that happened in that hotel room. Cuz a picture is worth a thousand words!

(Right as Artest is about to turn around to the Empire-Tron, Savoy rushes out from the back and snatches the mic from Artest.)

MN: Here comes the man of the hour, the pimp of the year!

SAVOY: Yo dawg, I don’t think these folks need to be peepin’ this tape you made here.

RA: Yeah they do! You’se a pimp, dawg, I gotsta show ‘em.

SAVOY: Dude, did you even watch it?

RA: Nah, man, I just set the camera up and I was out like trout, dawg.

SAVOY: Then you can just take my word for it that I was a mutha-funkin’ PEE-EYE-EM-PEE.

RA: Nah dawg, it’s gotta be better on tape, yo dub, roll that footage!

(The Empire-Tron rolls some grainy footage of Savoy sitting on a hotel bed with Lollipop standing in front of him with a weird look on her face.)

SAVOY on video: Alright baby, it’s time for you to ride a real snake…

(Savoy unzips his pants. Lollipop’s weird look grows weirder before she shirks back and shrieks.)

LOLLIPOP on video: Oh my, like, God... it’s so, like... TINY! EEEEK!

(Lollipop runs out of the room while Savoy is sitting on the bed mortified as the video goes to static.)

DM: Yeah, he’s looking like a big pimp now, isn’t he Neels?

MN: Shut up! Shut up!

(Artest looks at Savoy with an incredulous look on his face.)

RA: Um, uh, uh... I’m... sorry dawg?

SAVOY: YOU IDIOT!

JA: Hey, hey, I don’t mean to interrupt your lovers’ quarrel here, but I demand retribution.

MN: Retribution? Savoy’s been the one who was humiliated by lies! That Lollipop was just in awe of Savoy’s package!

DM: Yeah right, Neels, I’m sure it was so big she thought it was small.

MN: Hey, we never saw it on canvas

SAVOY: What are you talkin’ about?

JA: Retribution for my girlfriend having to see something so hideous.

CROWD: HUNG LIKE A MOUSE! (clap clap clapclapclap) HUNG LIKE A MOUSE! (clap clap clapclapclap)

SAVOY: You, oh, you *****es ain’t nothin’ but hos and tricks. I’ll get y’all for this!

(Savoy and Artest exit.)

JA: Well, that was pretty easy. Anyway folks, thank you, you’ve been a wonderful audience.

(Pop as JA and Lollipop exit.)

DT: Well, that was certainly a strange turn of events.

DM: Oh yeah, strange but wildly amusing.

MN: You shut up!

DT: (Laughing) Well all comedy aside we’ve got our first look at our TV Title competitors coming up right now as we get a preview of Priest and Jason Payne in action. Let’s got up to big Tony for the intro.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Priest vs. "The Dog of War" Jason Payne

TONY FATORA: This match is scheduled for one fall!

(Cue up "I Am the Bullgod." Priest comes out from the back, flanked by Eisenkreuz, to a mild chorus of boos, mixed with indifference.)

TF: Introducing first, from... um, your mom, *****, weighing in at 237 pounds, he is... PRIEEEEST!!

DT: Well, ever since Priest has returned from his injury, he’s been on somewhat of a high note.

DM: Well, he did beat Vladimir Vlachinko, but let’s not forget that big dude had a big role in it, and so did his German pal.

MN: Why don’t we start giving credit where credit is due! Priest is a rising star in this industry! And he’s got the looks too to go with his passion for the sport.

DM: Passion? Neels, don’t you realize the only reason he’s in the ring is out of threat of litigation from Paul Freeman?

MN: Hey... shut up.

DT: Well, Priest is in the ring, and Eisenkreuz takes his place outside.

(Cue up "Dogs of War." Jason Payne enters to a good-sized pop.)

TF: And his opponent, weighing in at nearly 300 pounds and hailing from Payneville, Kentucky, he is the Dog of War... JAAAAASON... PAAAAAAAYYYYYYNE!

DT: Jason Payne coming out to a good reaction here. A lot of Payniacs in the house.

DM: Did you just make that term up yourself, Dave?

DT: Yes I did. I think it’s the greatest fan name in the history of our sport.

DM: Please Dave, just stop.

MN: I agree with Dean.

DM: Wow, tape that because you’re not going to hear that being said often.

DT: Let’s just get to the action guys, and here we go, Payne in the ring, and he’s staring a hole right through Priest.

DM: Well, I would too if I was called a racist redneck.

MN: Hey, the truth hurts, and Priest speaks the truth, Dean-o.

DT: Well, yes, but let’s also remember that these are two men who will be competing for the brand new Television Title at the next pay-per-view event.

MN: My money’s on Priest! He’s made for tee-vee!

DM: Well, Payne may have something to say about that.

(DING DING DING!)

DT: Priest and Payne advance on each other. Priest for the collar and elbow... OH MY! Payne wanting none of it, drives a knee right to the midsection of Priest. And now double axhandle! One, two, and Priest is down on the canvas.

DM: Well, that ought to teach him to talk smack about the South, especially here in Memphis.

MN: Oh give it a rest Dean. These rednecks still think the PILEDRIVER of all moves is a career killer.

DM: Have you ever taken one, Neels?

MN: No, and I’d like to keep it that way.

DT: Priest trying to get up, but Payne with a kick right to the chops! Priest flies over on his back and now Payne is right on him, mounted punches! One, two, three, four, the ref tries to step in, Payne shoves him out of the way, five, six, seven, the ref is counting now, and Payne gets off. I think he realized that he might have gotten disqualified there.

MN: Yeah, stupid redneck, he should have just gotten himself dee-kyooed so he could have ended his embarrassment.

DM: Well, Priest is clearly the one getting embarrassed here.

DT: Jason Payne in control here, turning Priest over and now with the camel clutch. Stretching back on the neck and back of Priest here, that can’t be too comfortable.

DM: Well, if you’re Payne, it is, but he could always be more comfy in his very own La-Z-Boy recliner. Pick one up at your local furniture store today.

MN: WHY DO YOU GET ALL THE ENDORSEMENT DEALS?

DM: Maybe because I’m all... sexified.

DT: Fellas... back to the match, Payne lets go of the hold and drops Priest to the canvas! Priest is holding the back of his neck while Payne is hovering over him. He’s to the front of Priest and now scoops him up over his shoulder... shoulderbreaker! Cover...

...one...

...two...

...but Priest kicks out.

DM: Close call there.

DT: Indeed it was, Dean. Payne picks Priest up now, whips him off the ropes, clothesline, Priest ducks, turn around Jason, here comes Priest... FLYING CROSS B... NO! Payne caught him midair and now... OOH! Big powerslam! Payne covers again...

...one...

...two...

...th... NO! Priest kicks out!

DM: Priest is getting manhandled here. Good to see this punk get his comeuppance.

MN: You shut your mouth Dean! Priest is a prophet! He speaks the truth! Get up Priest! Get him!

DT: Payne now grabs Priest in a standing headscissors... he’s signaling to the crowd!

DM: They’re going bee-aye-en-aye-en-aye-ess bananas! Piledriver time!

MN: I hate that move!

DT: Payne going... no! He’s blocked... and Priest flips him over!

MN: I knew you had it in you, Priest! Go get him!

DM: You are shameless, you know that Neels?

MN: You’re one to talk, Mr. Corporate Shill!

DT: Priest up, so’s Payne. Payne charges in, but Priest counters with a drop toe hold! Priest with an elbow to the back of Payne’s head, turns him over, cover...

...one...

...NO! Payne throws Priest off him with authority!

DM: Man, Payne must have had some Red Bull energy drink before this match, cuz boy’s got WIIIINGS!

MN: I’m going to hurl.

DM: Not on me, Neels. Toss your cookies on Schiavone-bot.

DT: Hey! Stop that! Payne struggles to his feet and PRIEST with the preemptive attack, dropkick right to Payne’s head! The big Kentuckian back down to the canvas like a ton of bricks! Priest grabs him to his feet and… DDT! Payne down again. Cover...

...one...

...two...

...Payne kicks out!

MN: Priest has got him on the ropes!

DM: I wouldn’t say so yet, but he’s got the big Mo’ right about now.

DT: Priest has Payne up, could we see Down the Pisser here?

MN: I hope so!

DT: Priest... NO! Payne breaks out of the grip and CLOTHELINES PRIEST TO THE MAT HARD! It could be all over for Priest now, but... wait, what’s Priest doing?

DM: Haha, he’s begging for mercy from the ref!

DT: Priest is grabbing on the ref’s pants, I think he’s trying to get a reprieve here, wait a second... here comes Eisenkreuz in the ring!

MN: Right behind Payne! Haha, he’s going to get revenge for being called a Russian!

DT: No! No, this isn’t fair! Turn around Jason! Too late! Eisenkreuz has got Payne by the throat and... DEUTSCHESLAMMEN! Jason Payne is out cold on the mat, and Eisenkreuz bolts out of the ring like a bat out of hell! No, not like this! Priest turns around and he’s back on his feet. He goes to the top rope and... FROGSPLASH! No! Don’t count ref, it’s a travesty...

...one...

...two...

...THREE!

(DING DING DING!)

TF: Here is your winner by pinfall... PRIIIIEEEEEST!

DT: And there you go, Priest steals a win with help from his German bodyguard, and he’ll have some more momentum going into the Television Championship fray.

MN: Well, maybe that oughtta teach Payne not to confuse Germans with Russians.

DT: Oh man, stay tuned for more Empire Pro action!

(Cue up a commercial for Wakks Atlantic Empire Pro Action Figures.)
 

DBrunkGXW

Consigliere
Joined
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Messages
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(Cut to The Phenom’s locker room. Steve Savoy, Ricky Williams and Ron Artest are sitting around a table.) RW: Yo dawg, we got anymore weed left?

RA: I don’t got none. How bout you, Phenom?

SAVOY: Nope, I ain’t got ****. But I do gots a hookup, lemme call my dawg Katz.

(Savoy dials up on his cell phone.)

SAVOY: Yeah, Phenom here, yeah... yeah, yeah... probably an ounce... yeah, that oughtta keep us baked for a good long time... yeah.... yeah... gangsta, awesome, I’ll be there in fit’teen. Peace.

(Puts down his cell.)

SAVOY: Aight, I’m bouncin’, I’ll be back with the goods.

(Savoy gets up and opens his locker room door. Right as it opens all the way, a cast iron frying pan attached to a rope swings down and conks Savoy right in the head. The Phenom falls back, knocked out. Artest gets up {Ricky’s too stoned to notice} and runs over, looking in the frying pan to see a note in it. He picks it up and reads it out loud.)

RA: That was for kidnapping my girl... J. Oh man, that son of a ***** gon’ get it! Phenom, wake up. Wake up.

(Shaking him.)

RA: Wake up, c’mon man, ain’t no time to sleep on the job, dawg. Wake up.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Cut to the announce table.)

DT: Well, JA certainly got some measure of revenge.

MN: After all the humiliation he’s put the Phenom through, I think it’s that stupid masked jerk who should get some.

DM: Oh pipe down.

DT: Anyway, it’s time for our next match...

MN: Wooh yeah, this one should be good. Artest and Williams taking on Troy Windham’s men, you know carnage will ensue.

DT: Let’s go to the ring for the introductions shall we?



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


The Entourage vs. Ron Artest/Ricky Williams

TF: The following tag-team contest is set for one fall.

(CUE UP: Nothing, as Zoltan and De La Rossi come out already attacking their opponents)

DM: No introductions needed, as all four men are going at it before they even get to the ring! Zoltan with a clubbing blow there on Williams, and August is hammering Artest with lefts and rights.

DT: Zoltan shoving Williams into the ring, and he turns and NAILS Artest with a clothesline off the Irish Whip from De La Rossi. The smaller member of the Entourage now in the ring, and he scores a hard kick to the head there!! Zoltan on the outside just threw Artest into the ringpost from a gorilla press!!

MN: I think that’s the end of mister Artest.

DM: Looks like it’s going to be the end of the Posse. I don’t know when this started, but my card has the Posse coming out first, so they must have been jumped at the curtain. August with a hard snap suplex there, straight into the cover.

...one...

...two...

And Williams gets his shoulder up. August whips him into the corner, and the tag to Zoltan!!

DT: This big man from Germany knows how to outpower people, as he slams Williams down hard. Tags in August, and Zoltan... HE’S SITTING ON THE TOP ROPE!! De La Rossi on his shoulders...

MN: Star Press!! Most spectacular if I may say so.

DT: You may Mike, as De La Rossi goes for the cover.

...one...

...TWO...

THREE!!! It’s all over after that Shooting Star Press off his partner’s shoulders!!

TF: The winners of the match... ZZZZZOOOOOOOLLLLLTTTTTTAAANNNNNNN and AAAAAUUUUUUUUGGGGGGUUUUUUSSSSSSSSSTTTTT DE LA RRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!

DM: Damn, talk about with the quickness!

DT: Windham’s Entourage save a bit of face with a win here tonight and...



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(The lights in the New Orleans arena dim down to black and the EmpireTron comes to life.)

MN: Aww, great. Another interruption. Don't these people realize that time is money on network TV?

DM: Umm Neely? She can interrupt me ANY time.

MN: What? She?

DT: Take a look!

(The men in the sold out crowd in the arena let out a collective "WHOA", and the cat-calls and whistles soon follow as we see a stunningly beautiful woman - blond wavy hair falling just past her shoulders, mesmerizing blue eyes about five-foot-ten, maybe five-foot-eleven, dressed in tight jeans and a black EPW mini-tee thankfully showing off her sexy midriff to go along with the rest of her knockout body - walking through the backstage area.)

DM: Excuse me boys, I think I need some personal time!

MN: *whistles*

DT: And just who is THAT?

MN: I'll be happy to go find out for you.

(The woman rounds a corner in the backstage area, camera two doing a great job of catching the rear view as she walks down the hall. She comes to a door which she opens without knocking, and enters the room. The camera catches the door as it closes, and we see a name stenciled into the door - BEAST. A cheer fills the arena as the name appears.)

MN: Awww, my dream is ruined!

DM: What's up, Neely?

MN: How could a woman THAT hot go into Loafy's dressing room? He must have paid for her. That's it. No self respecting woman would DO that!

(CUT TO: The EmpireTron, and the inside of Beast's dressing room, and the arena crowd POPS! when we see the former EPW World Heavyweight Champion standing in the back of the room. As the door closes behind the woman, Beast turns and hangs up his cell phone, and the woman walks up to him.)

Beast: Hey, babe.

MN: Babe?

Woman: Hey, tiger.

MN: I'm gonna be sick.

(The woman kisses Beast.)

MN: *GAG*

DT: Neely, you ok?

MN: Ohh! I think I threw up in my mouth just a little bit.

DM: If you stain my shirt, I'm gonna kick your ass!

Beast: Well, hello to you too, Jessica. What was that for?

Jessica: You just looked like you could use some cheering up, is all.

Beast: Well, it *is* gonna take some getting used to not being the World Heavyweight Champion after what that ***** Troy pulled.

(Jessica puts her hands on Beast's chest.)

Jessica: Well, you're gonna have to go back out there and take it back, now aren't you?

Beast: Easier said than done. Dan Ryan and I aren't exactly on the best of terms right now. I don't think he's going to chomping at the bit to give me a rematch, no matter *how* upset I am when I demand it. I mean, hell, I go from being the World Heavyweight Champion one week to not even being booked the next.

Jessica: But you've got a match this week. And it's against Adam Benjamin, a guy you've beaten twice before. You're going to go out there and do what you do best, that's all. You're just going to have to make the best of it and beat the hell out of whoever he puts in that ring with you, week after week. Ryan will have no choice but to realize that you STILL ARE the best this company's ever seen. You'll have a rematch with Troy and beat that filthy disgusting whore like Ike beat Tina. Then we'll put that World Title back around your ripped little waist.

(The arena crowd lets out a cheer!)

Beast: I like the way you think, kiddo.

Jessica: I knew you would.

(The EmpireTron fades down, and the house lights come back on.)

MN: Who the hell can think about eating after seeing that disgusting display?

DT: It's going to be interesting, don't you think? Will Beast be able to convince Dan Ryan to give him a rematch? Or is Ryan hell-bent on burying the former Champion? I can't wait to see how this turns out. We'll be right back after this!

(Cue up a commercial for Colon Blow Cereal, now with 80% more dietary fiber!)
 

DBrunkGXW

Consigliere
Joined
Sep 11, 1997
Messages
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Points
36
Age
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Location
Katy, TX
DT: Alright, Empire Pro fans, we're back from commercial, and quite frankly, I needed the break. DM: That last bit too much for you, Thomas?

DT: I don't know how to explain it, but...

MN: (handing Thomas something) Here you can use my rag. This part right here is still clean.

DT: AHHRRG!

MN: What??

DT: You’re truly disgusting. You know that, right?

MN: Magic happens when it's a fine woman like that comes out, baby! Even if she's with Big Loafy.

DT: Whatever you say, Neely, but I'm geared up for this next match. Folks, it's time for Benjamin/Beast III, and this is a match that many have been waiting for for quite some time.

MN: You mean people are actually interested in seeing Big Loafy wrestle? You gotta be kidding me!

DM: Actually, I'm with Dave on this one. These two men have met twice before, both times while Beast held the EPW World Heavyweight Championship, and both matches were classic wrestling matches with fantastic action. These two are gold in the ring together.

DT: That's exactly what I was getting at. Let's go down to the ring to Tony Fatora, and let's get this one started!

(The camera cuts to the ring with Tony Fatora holding a microphone. He takes his finger off of his ear piece, and raises his mic.)



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Beast vs. "Yours Truly" Adam Benjamin

TF: Ladies and gentlemen, the following match is scheduled for one fall.

(CUE UP: "Lose Yourself" by Eminem.

The crowd lets out a big round of cheers as "Yours Truly" Adam Benjamin makes his way slowly to the ring. Adam is wearing two English flag bandanas - one that covers his head and the other that covers the lower part of his face revealing only his stone cold eyes. The camera picks up a sign from a fan in the front row that says "WELCOME BACK, ADAM!")

TF: Introducing first... he hails from the United Kingdom, standing six feet, four inches tall. He weighs in at two hundred and forty five pounds... he was the inaugural EPW Intercontinental Champion... he is... ADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM BENNNNNNNNJAMIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNN!!

MN: I don't know about you guys, but I think Adam's finally due to beat Loafy. He's taken him so far in the last two outings, coming SO close to winning the EPW World Heavyweight Championship, and this match, while not for the title, has got to feel like some measure of vengeance for Benjamin.

DM: Neely, are you feeling ok today?

MN: Yes, why?

DM: That was actually very insightful. And unexpected, coming from you.

MN: I'm not JUST about the good looks, you know.

DT: Obviously, Neely, but regardless, you're absolutely right. Benjamin has GOT to shake the Beast from his back, and you might be right - Adam's coming back from a bit of a break. He says he's fresh, focused, and ready. He'll be giving it all to Beast tonight.

(Adam makes his way into the ring and stands firm in his corner waiting for the bell to ring.)

TF: And, his opponent...

(The sound of chanting monks fill the arena, and the crowd gets to its feet.

CUE UP: "Figured You Out" by Nickelback. Beast steps out onto the stage area, accompanied by his lovely girlfriend Jessica , and the crowd lets out a thunderous pop! Beast takes a moment to acknowledge his fans before continuing down the ramp to the ring.)

MN: Wow, is she HOT! You know what I'd do to her? I'd-

DT: Not on a family show, you wouldn't. Besides, I'd think Beast would kick your ass. Beast looks focused, guys, and with good reason. He needs to come out and impress Dan Ryan to get another shot at the title that he was screwed out of by Lindsay Troy at Russian Roulette.

DM: And that's why I think that Beast is going to come out on top of this one tonight, guys. Not only is he fighting for himself, but he really wants to stick it to Dan Ryan, and I think we're going to see Beast take this match tonight. That being said, it's going to be a wicked match.

(Beast and Jessica get to ringside, and Beast steps up to the apron, and holds the ropes open for Jessica, who enters the ring. Beast follows, and turns and raises his arms to the crowd, which gets him another round of cheers. The official takes a couple moments to talk to both men, and then Jessica leaves the ring as the official calls for the bell!

SFX: DING! DING!)

DT: Alright folks! Beast/Benjamin III is about to happen! Hang on to your seats!

(Beast and Benjamin come out of their corners, and start circling slowly around the ring. The two men then stop, wiggling fingers in preparation, then lock up like a couple of rams colliding in the mountains.)

MN: Have you ever felt the ring move when two guys locked up before?

(Beast and Benjamin each struggle for the advantage, but Benjamin suddenly makes a standing switch, and tries to take Beast down, yet the former Champion swings a couple of back elbows to try and get Benjamin off of him. Benjamin ducks the elbows and lets go of the waist lock to get out of trouble, and the two men spin around and face each other and stare each other down.)

DM: There's a stalemate to start things off!

(Beast and Benjamin stare each other down again, each man looking for a hole to break through, and they move to lock up again, but this time it's Benjamin who reaches and out and takes Beast down with an arm drag. Beast crashes to the mat, and immediately gets to one knee, looking at Benjamin. Beast gets back to his feet, and once again, stares at Benjamin. Jessica claps her hands on the outside, and Beast and Benjamin head in for another lock up, and this time Benjamin sidesteps and takes Beast over with a hip toss!)

DT: But Beast gets right back up, and there's another arm drag from Benjamin! Beast is back to his feet! Another arm drag! Beast is up again! A THIRD arm drag from Benjamin!

DM: There's a leg drop from Benjamin, and he goes for a quick cover!

ONE!

DT: WHOA! Beast just pressed Benjamin three feet into the air! What a kickout!

DM: There's no way Benjamin is beating Beast with that. We've seen Beast take pounding after pounding, and the man just doesn't quit. You're going to need much, much more to beat him. But Benjamin just made a statement there, folks! He just told Beast that he's here to wrestle and wrestle hard, and you'd better keep up!

DT: I'm thinking Benjamin was trying to surprise Beast and throw him off his game, and Dean, it almost worked!

MN: That would have been awesome to see Benji beat Big Loafy in under a minute!

(The crowd cheers as Beast presses Benjamin off of him, and both men quickly get to their feet. Beast looks surprised, and Benjamin has a small smirk on his face. Beast smirks back, and motions for Benjamin to bring it on. The two men lock up again, and this time they struggle for position for several moments, before Beast rears back and shoves Benjamin to the canvas!)

DT: And there's a power display from the former World Champion!

DM: Beast's a strong boy. There's only a couple men here that could match him, I think.

MN: But it looks like Benji's going to try again!

(The two men lock up again, one more time working for position, and once again, Beast rears back with a growl and shoves Benjamin to the canvas, and Benjamin bounces and rolls over backwards! Benjamin immediately gets to his feet and charges Beast, but Beast manages to scoop Benjamin up and slam him down to the canvas hard! Benjamin bounces into a sitting position and clutches his back, his face showing a little discomfort, but the Englishman still manages to get right back to his feet. Now it's Beast's turn to smirk at Benjamin!)

DT: And I'm guessing that's Beast speaking back to Benjamin, Dean?

DM: That's exactly right, Dave! Beast just told Benjamin that he's bigger and stronger, and if you want to play that game, I'll drive you through the canvas. You'd better find another way!

(Beast and Benjamin walk to the center of the ring, and rather than lock up, the two men start talking a bit of trash back and forth. The two continue on for several moments as the crowd buzzes, wondering when they're going to explode, then Benjamin points to the ropes. Beast smiles and points to the opposite ropes. Adam nods, and both men take off, Benjamin takes off and hits the ropes, and Beast follows suit, heading 90 degrees to the opposite ropes, and both men are charging across the ring!)

DM: OLD SCHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!

DT: It's an old fashioned criss cross!

(The crowd follows Dean's lead and lets out a big yell of "OLD SCHOOL!" as Beast and Benjamin run the ropes. They make several passes, and suddenly Benjamin staggers his steps a bit, setting his timing, and then leaps to the top rope and springboards back, twisting through the air, and the crowd cheers as he levels Beast with a monster dropkick!)

DT: What a maneuver from Adam Benjamin! I don't think I've ever seen anything like that before!

MN: Who thought we'd ever see that from an Englishman?

DT: Beast gets back to his feet now, and Benjamin charges in with a clothesline! Beast ducks! Benjamin hits the brakes and throws a back kick at Beast! Beast catches Benjamin's foot, and looks to go for an ankle lock, but Benjamin twists and pushes Beast away with his feet! Benjamin gets back to a vertical base! Beast with a kick to Benjamin's guts, and hoists him up - powerbomb on the way! NO!! Benjamin held on to Beast's head! There's a couple punches from Benjamin! Benjamin staggers the big man! Benjamin flips backward, looking for a hurricanrana, but Beast holds on and places Benjamin into a Boston crab! Outstanding!

DM: What a display of back and forth action between these two!

(The crowd pops at the display from the two men, and Benjamin's yells of pain begin to fill the arena, and the official leaps into position to see if Benjamin wants to submit! But he doesn't, and soon manages to break the hold by grabbing on to the bottom rope! The official asks Beast to break the hold, and Beast gets to his feet, and lets go long enough to break, but then grabs Benjamin's foot again and yanks him away from the ropes, yet Benjamin manages to hop up to his foot, and stands there with Beast holding his foot. Benjamin leaps into the air...)

DT: HUGE enziguri from Benjamin!

Beast falls to his knees, then collapses on the canvas, and Benjamin goes for a pin!

ONE!

TWO!

DT: Beast with another strong kickout!

DM: This is looking to be a hell of a match guys. Every time Beast knocks Benjamin down, he gets back and finds a way to take over. But every time Benjamin gets a hold of Beast, Loafy finds a way to wrestle toe-to-toe with Benjamin and ends up taking over himself!

(As Beast gets back to his feet, Benjamin nails him with a chop, and Beast clutches at his chest as the crowd yells WHOOOOO! Benjamin lands a couple more chops that drives Beast back to the corner, where Benjamin follows him in and lands a monster European uppercut that stuns the big man. Benjamin leaps up to the second rope, and starts landing a series of shots to Beast's forehead! The crowd counts along as Benjamin pounds away at Beast!

ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE! TEN!

Beast wobbles a bit in the corner...)

DT: WHAT A TORNADO DDT OUT OF THE CORNER BY BENJAMIN!! THERE'S A COVER!

ONE!

TWO!!

DT: KICKOUT!

DM: And Beast kicks out again! Benjamin pulls Beast to his feet, and nails a couple right hands, then steps back and nails Beast with a clothesline!

DT: But Beast doesn't go down!

DM: There's another clothesline! Beast is back to the ropes! Benjamin steps back as Beast leans on the ropes, a small look of frustration on his face, and Benjamin charges and nails a third clothesline, and he knocks Beast over the top, and the big man crashes to the floor outside!

MN: Benji almost took his freakin' head off!

DT: I might be mistaken, but I think Benjamin's starting to feel a little frustrated here.

DM: You might be right, Dave. He's not looking too happy, about Beast stalemating him or besting him in some of these exchanges.

(On the outside of the ring, Benjamin follows Beast out to the floor, and pulls the former EPW Champion to his feet, and slams his head down into the ring apron! Beast bounces off, and Benjamin grabs him by the hair, and once again slams Beast's head into the ring apron! Beast bounces off the apron again, and Benjamin whips Beast into the steel ring post! The crowd OOOOOOOOH's as Beast slams into the post and collapses onto the floor!)

DT: This is a little unorthodox from Benjamin, guys. We rarely see him take it outside the ring.

DM: I think that he knows he has to wear Beast down quite a bit if he's going to beat him. Benjamin rolls Beast back into the ring at the count of 8, and rolls in himself. Benjamin then heads for the corner, and gets up to the top rope. As Beast slowly pulls himself back to his feet, Benjamin flies off the top rope, and absolutely drills Beast in the face with a flying reverse elbow!

DT: Beast is down! And here's a pin by Benjamin!

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!!!

DT: NO!! BEAST KICKED OUT!

The crowd cheers and Jessica celebrates as Beast kicks out!

DM: Man, that was close!

(Benjamin looks up at the official and holds up three fingers, symbolizing the three count, but the ref shakes his head no, he definitely saw Beast's shoulder come up off the mat! Benjamin slaps the mat, and pulls Beast up to his feet again. Benjamin starts hitting some chops, once again drawing WHOOOO's from the crowd!)

DM: You can hear those shots all through the arena!

DT: Benjamin's hitting hard, tonight! But wait a minute, what's going on here?

(All attention turns to the top of the ramp as EPW Owner Dan Ryan has appeared, and he makes his way down the ramp!)

MN: It's the big boss hoss!

DT: Most likely come to see Beast perform and see if he's deserving of that title rematch!

(Ryan reaches ringside just as Benjamin whips Beast to the ropes, and hits an outstanding overhead capture suplex!)

DM: You've gotta be kidding me! Benjamin just tossed Beast three quarters of the way across the ring! What a maneuver!

DT: And there's a low dropkick right to Beast's face as he's seated!

MN: There's a hook of a leg! Loafy's done!

ONE!

TWO!

THR-KICKOUT!!

(The crowd cheers as Beast kicks out! Jessica is shown clapping her hands, as is Dan Ryan, although the look on his face is very serious. Benjamin then returns to his feet and stomps away at the back of Beast's head and neck, before picking up the former Champion, and planting him right back into the canvas with a front Russian leg sweep! Benjamin pulls Beast up again, and grabbing his head, slowly turns him around, readying for a Rick Rude-style neckbreaker.)

DT: Benji's really targeting the head and neck of Beast right now!

DM: He may figure that the only way to beat Beast is to knock him silly long enough to get the pin!

(Benjamin finally gets Beast into position, but suddenly Beast reaches up and grabs Benjamin's arm! He starts pushing Benjamin's arm away, yet Benji fights to keep his hold on Beast's head! The crowd gets behind Beast, as does Jessica and Dan Ryan, who are all stamping the floor, and the arena thunders as everyone urges Beast to get out of the maneuver!)

MN: I think I'm gonna be sick. All these people cheering for Loafy.

DT: Beast is still trying to power his way out of this to avoid the big neckbreaker! He's got Benjamin's arm just above his own head, his arm trembling with the effort!

DM: Finally, Beast pushes Benjamin's arm away! This crowd is going nuts!

(Beast shoves Benjamin's arm up and away, causing Benjamin to spin around. Beast punches Benjamin in the face, and the crowd pops as Beast levels Benjamin with a stiff, stiff clothesline!)

DT: And both men are down! The official is administering the count!

ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN!

DM: They're both up! Benjamin takes a swing at Beast, but Beast blocks it! He fired back with one of his own and snaps Benjamin's head back! A second shot by Beast! A third! A fourth! Beast whips Benjamin into the ropes, and the crowd cheers as the new age technician rebounds right into an old age big boot from Beast!

DT: Benjamin eats a size 16 leather sandwich, and he's down!

(Beast pulls Benajmin up, and executes a picture perfect stalling suplex! He continues his offense by bringing Benjamin back up and whipping him to the ropes. Benjamin rebounds right into a huge sidewalk slam from Beast! Beast shouts out to the crowd, who cheer back as he pulls Benjamin up, wraps his arms around him, and hoists him up...)

DM: Oh man, what a monster back breaker there from Beast! He's concentrating on Benjamin's back, to try and take away some strength and flexibility that aids Benjamin in that pure wrestling style of his!

DT: Wait, there's Beast with a cover!

MN: NO!

ONE!

TWO!

DT: KICKOUT! Benjamin kicks out!

(Beast gets to his feet and backs away across the ring, getting into a crouch position as he waits for Benjamin to rise. The crowd starts buzzing, as they know what's coming up next! Beast yells at Benjamin to get up, and as he does, Beast explodes across the ring and the crowd erupts into cheers as he spears Benjamin violently down to the canvas!)

DT: GORE!! GORE!! GORE!!

DM: Beast nearly cut Benjamin right in half with that spear!

DT: There's a cover! This one's gotta be over!

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

DT: NO!!! NO!!! ADAM BENJAMIN KICKED OUT! HE KICKED OUT!

MN: Big Daddy E is still in this one!

(Beast pulls Benjamin to his feet, and whips him to the ropes. Benjamin rebounds, and leaps through the air...)

DT: FLYING FOREARM!

DM: BUT BEAST DUCKED!

MN: BIG DADDY JUST WIPED OUT THE REFEREE!

DT: BEAST BOOTS BENJAMIN IN THE GUTS!! OHHHH NOOOOOOO!!! WHAT A POWEROMB!!

DM: I think there's an indent in the mat where Beast just planted Benjamin!

DT: But Beast doesn't know the referee's out! He's making the pin!

But there's no count, so the crowd counts!

ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR!

Beast then realizes that there's no official, so he gets up and looks around. Seeing the official sprawled out in the corner, and he goes to check on him. As he does, Dan Ryan reaches into his pocket, and throws a rolled up chain into the ring!

DT: Uh-oh, looks like Dan Ryan is continuing to press Beast into "doing what it takes!"

(Beast turns around to go back to Benjamin, and then sees Dan Ryan at ringside - and the chain lying a couple feet away. Dan and Beast stare at each other a moment, then Beast watches as Dan Ryan's eyes move slowly over to the chain, and then back to Beast. Beast looks at the chain, and back to Ryan, and over to Benjamin. Beast then looks back to Ryan, and shakes his head. Ryan points at the chain and tells Beast to use it on Benjamin!)

DT: And here we go guys! Dan Ryan still is after Beast to take advantage of his situations, but Beast continues to refuse to have anything to do with it!

MN: Is Beast stupid or what? He'll get what he wants if plays ball with Ryan! I don't understand!

DM: Some people just won't sell out, Neely, but I guess we discovered that you have a pretty low sale price.

MN: You'd be surprised what I'd do if I was a wrestler and had a World Title shot being dangled like a carrot in front of my face.

DT: Wait a minute, guys! Take a look at what's going on inside the ring!

(Back inside the sqaured circle, Benjamin has gotten back to his feet, and grabbed the chain off the canvas that Dan Ryan had thrown there earlier, and is now wrapping the chain around his fist! Jessica is yelling at Beast to turn around, and the crowd is yelling as well. Beast turns around, but it's too late! Benjamin cocks his hand back, and nails Beast right between the eyes!)

MN: YEAH BENJI!!

DM: WHOA! BEAST WENT DOWN LIKE HE'S BEEN SHOT!

(The crowd erupts into boos, and Benjamin unwraps the chain from his hand, and tosses it out of the ring! He stands over Beast, just looking down at him! Beast is split open, a rivulet of blood running down his face!)

MN: There, Beast! That's how you get things done! Get the official, Benjamin!

(Benjamin stands there a couple moments longer, looking down at his hand, as if he's thinking about what he's done, but he soon pushes the thoughts aside, and heads over to revive the official! With a couple slaps to the face, Benjamin gets the official to stir, and point over at Beast! The ref nods, and Benjamin goes to make a rather nonchalant cover, lying with his back over Beast's chest! The official shakes out the cobwebs, and begins to crawl across the ring to make the count!)

DT: DON'T LET THIS MATCH END LIKE THIS!

(The official reaches Beast and Benjamin, and slowly raises a hand to make a count! Benjamin pumps his fist in the air with each slap of the official's hand!)

OOOOOOOOOOONE!

MN: SLOW COUNT!

TWOOOOOOOOOOO!

MN: COUNT FASTER!

THREE!!!!!!!!!!!

DT: NO!!! NO!!!! NO!!!! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, BEAST KICKED OUT!!! BEAST KICKED OUT!!!!

(The sold out crowd leaps to their feet and a thunderous pop fills the arena! Jessica wipes away tears as Beast just barely gets the shoulder up!)

MN: HOW IN THE (FCC) DID HE DO THAT?!??!?!

DM: Good thing the censors are on the ball tonight!

(Benjamin rolls over to his knees, and slaps the mat three times, and holds three fingers up to the official! The official holds up two fingers, and simulates getting his shoulder off the mat! Benjamin gets to his feet and grabs the official by the scruff of his shirt with both hands, and starts yelling at him about the slow count! The official tries to explain that he was knocked out, and did his best!)

DT: Oh, this is just wrong!

DM: Folks, I believe we're seeing the systematic destruction of Adam Benjamin.

(Benjamin shoves the official back, as Dan Ryan looks on with interest, and Benjamin turns around and puts his hands to his head, and stomps around the ring for a moment, before sliding under the bottom rope and out of the ring.)

DT: What's he up to now?

(Benjamin heads over to the time keepers' table and shoves the time keeper off his chair, and takes the chair and heads back towards the ring. He slides under the bottom rope with the chair, and heads back towards Beast. The official starts yelling at Benjamin not to use the chair, cause if he does, he'll be disqualified!)

DM: Adam Benjamin has a decision to make here, guys! Either toss the chair and try and finish the match, or use it and get disqualified! Perhaps even fined for such a blatant disregard for the rules!

(The crowd starts yelling at Benjamin to not use the chair, and Jessica pleads with him from the arena floor to not hit Beast!)

DT: DON'T DO IT BENJI!

MN: WAFFLE BIG LOAFY! DO IT!

(Back in the ring, Beast starts to get to his feet, and Benjamin winds up with the chair, and thinks about it for a moment...)

DT: What's he gonna-

CRACK!!

DT: YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING ME!!

MN: YES!! YES!!

(The fans leap to their feet and fill the arena with boos!)

DM: ADAM BENJAMIN JUST WAFFLED BEAST WITH THAT STEEL CHAIR!!!

SFX: DING! DING!

DT: And the official has just disqualified Adam Benjamin!

TF: Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of this match... by disqualification... BEAST!!!

(Dan Ryan stands shocked on the outside of the ring, and Benjamin stands over Beast, still holding the chair in his hands.)

DT: Adam Benjamin, you filthy sonofa-

CRACK!!

DT: HE JUST NAILED BEAST AGAIN WITH THAT CHAIR!!

MN: I LOVE ADAM BENJAMIN!

CRACK!!!

MN: MWEEEHEEHEEEEEEE!!!

DM: HE NAILED HIM AGAIN!

DT: ADAM BENJAMIN HAS JUST SNAPPED AND BEAST IS BLEEDING LIKE A STUCK PIG!!

SFX: DING! DING! DING! DING! DING!

(The boos in the arena intensify five-fold, and Jessica has had enough! Jessica slides into the ring, and just as Benjamin winds up to deliver another shot, Jessica throws herself on top of Beast, attempting to shield him with her body! Benjamin hesitates for a moment, then yells at her to get out of the way, but she refuses! Benjamin has had enough, and he grabs Jessica by the arm, and pulls her off of Beast and up to her feet! Jessica pleads with Benjamin not to do any further damage! Benjamin steps back...

CRAACCCKKKKK!!!)

CROWD: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

DT: THE SONOFA***** JUST NAILED THE LOVELY JESSICA WITH THAT STEEL CHAIR!!

MN: ADAM'S MY NEW HERO!!

DT: This is just sick!! What the hell has gotten into Adam Benjamin?!?!

SFX: DING! DING! DING! DING! DING!

(Suddenly, a swarm of officials come roaring out of the back and come racing down the ramp! Benjamin slowly backs away as the officials hit the ring and swarm him to keep him from attacking any further!)

DT: Look at the chaos in the ring! Beast is out cold! Jessica isn't moving! Beast's entire face is covered in blood! Adam Benjamin has made a statement here tonight! Folks, I hate to leave this scene, but we've got to go to commercial! And it's about time! Back right after this!

(Cue up a commercial for the movie of the week, "Their Eyes Were Watching My Godmother's Bust.")
 

DBrunkGXW

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DT: We’re back... and Beast and Jessica are finally making it to their feet, surrounded by ring crew and medical personnel... but the big man’s waving off any help. You can't deny that Beast's drive to reclaim the title has been phenomenal, guys. DM: The man's a machine, Dave Thomas. He's got his sights set on the prize and he's not letting his attention waver one bit.

(As "Figured You Out" continues to play, Beast gestures to the crowd for a moment, then rolls out of the ring and starts up the ramp. Abruptly, however, everything goes dark, evoking a gasp from the surprised crowd... and then raucous boos as a familiar song begins to play.)

(Cue up: "Dark Machine" - Paul Oakenfold)

DT: Wha-WHAT?!

MN: NO WAY, IT CAN'T BE!

DM: I THOUGHT HE WAS GONE!

(As the song cues up, a shadowed figure gazes down on the arena from the EPW-tron at the thunderously booing crowd, dimly lit as if by car headlights through a window. A soft, echoing voice resonates through the arena.)

"He exists in a world... beyond your world..."

(Cue up: Thudding bass, booming through the stadium, thundering in a haunting beat behind ghostly chanting - high, then rapidly low and long, then a long medium note, repeat.)

"We only fantasize. He does."

"He lives a life where nothing is beyond him."

"Nothing is beyond him."

(As heavier bass kicks in, the curtains at the head of the ramp part. Spreading his arms at his sides, Christian Sands stands amidst a sheet of mist curling at his feet, his muscular frame illuminated by the flickering red strobe lights that flash on and off to the beat, pulsating in a bloody rhythm.)

DT: MY GOD, I can't believe it - Christian Sands is back in Empire Pro Wrestling after a hiatus of several months!

MN: Geez, I thought he was on sabbatical!

DT: So did I, Mike Neely, but there he is, right before our very eyes! The first Empire Pro Wrestling World Heavyweight Champion in history is BACK right here on Aggression!

DM: Beast doesn't look to happy about this.

(The music slowly fades out, the lights returning to normal. Cut to: A smirking Sands standing at the head of the ramp draped in faded jeans and an Ottawa Senators hockey jersey, eyes locked on the blond man at the ramp's foot. Cut to: Beast standing at the foot of the ramp, glaring intensely at his old rival.)

MN: This doesn't look good...

(Cut to: Sands continuing to smirk. He begins to lift a microphone... then slowly lowers it, chuckling deeply to himself and shaking his head at Beast. Cut to: Beast shouting something inaudible up at Sands. Cut to: Sands chuckling even more heartily as he turns and walks slowly to the back, leaving a visibly irritated Beast standing at the foot of the ramp. After a moment, Beast smacks his fist into his palm and stalks up the ramp.)



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Troy Douglas vs. Cross

DT: What was THAT all about?

MN: I don't know, but I think Sands got a kick out of it.

DM: He's trying to get into Beast's head over something, I can tell that much.

DT: It's probably safe to say that Beast isn't happy to see Christian Sands back here in EPW. These two have been rivals since day one.

DM: You can never tell with Beast.

MN: Sure you can. It's Big Loafy! He's about as subtle as a jackhammer to the neck.

DM: Sure, Mike. Sure.

DT: Well, that match had the beginnings of another Beast/Benjamin classic, but it quickly deteriorated from there. I never thought I'd see Adam Benjamin pull something like that.

MN: The man's discovering himself, Thomas! And I happen to like what he's found! Maybe he'll keep it up! Besides, what about Christian Sands man??

DT: Definitely a lot to keep our eyes on... but coming up next, we've got a match with a guy that's got his own issues.

DM: I'm telling you guys, when Cross lets it all hang out, I don't think there's anyone here that can touch him.

DT: Absolutely! Cross is a multiple time World Heavyweight Champion. I expect nothing less from him.

The announce team is interrupted as "Kashmir" by Led Zeppelin begins to blare over the PA.

TF: Ladies and gentlemen, the following match is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, heading down the aisle, hailing from Greensboro, North Carolina... standing at six feet, five inches tall, and weighing in at two hundred and sixty pounds... he... is... TROY DOOOOOUUUUUUGLAAAAAASSSSSSS!!

MN: My God! Unbelievable!

DT: What is it, Neely!

MN: Douglas found the arena!

DM: OH SNAP!

DT: Troy WAS rather quiet in his promotional spots.. er, lack of... this week. Here's hoping he's ready to turn it up a notch to face Cross.

Troy enters the ring, and heads to a neutral corner.

TF: And, his opponent!

"Jesus Walks" by Kanye West fills the arena, and the arena gets to their feet. There's a loud mix of boos and cheers, although the crowd seems to be more pro than against.

TF: He hails from Los Angeles, California! Standing at six feet, nine inches tall, and weighing in at two hundred and eighty five pounds... THIS... IS... CRRRRRRROSSSSSSSSSSS!!

Cross finishes coming down the runway, and he slides into the ring under the bottom rope, and as he does, Troy Douglas explodes and rushes Cross, as he begins to stomp away at Cross' back, keeping the big man from getting to his feet. Douglas continues to stomp in with the boots, and the official calls for the bell!

DT: Douglas is attacking early to get the advantage over Cross! Can't say I like it, but that IS a smart strategy!

Douglas continues to pound away, but Cross begins to fight to his feet. Douglas lets out a massive chop that draws a "WHOOOOO!" from the crowd, and sends Cross back into the ropes. Douglas fires Cross across the ring to the far ropes, where Cross rebounds and Douglas lands a big back body drop! Cross gets back to his feet, but Douglas manages to boot him in the guts, and wipe him out with a big time swinging neckbreaker!

DM: I think I just felt Cross' 6th and 7th vertebrae fusing together.

DT: That certainly was crisp, Dean, and Cross has got to feel that one.

Douglas pulls Cross up by the arm and fires him across the ring and HARD into the corner, and Douglas takes off to charge at Cross in the corner...

DT: Douglas looking for a big splash in the corner... BUT CROSS GETS THE FOOT UP AND NEARLY TOOK DOUGLAS' HEAD OFF!

Douglas stumbles backward away from the corner holding his mouth, and Cross explodes out of the corner and levels Douglas with a stiff clothesline! Douglas goes down, and Cross scrambles over for a pin!

ONE!

TWO!!

KICKOUT!

DT: Douglas gets the shoulder up there!

DM: Those were a couple big time connections from Cross, but it's much too soon. He's gotta put more into this,

Cross pulls Douglas to his feet and whips him to the ropes. Douglas rebounds, and Cross takes his opponent down with a massive spinebuster! Cross gets back to his feet, and pulls Douglas up after him, before lifting him up into the air, and then dropping Douglas over a knee into a gut buster! The crowd cringes and lets out an "OOOOOOOOOOOOO" as Douglas bounces off of Cross' knne and hits the mat, curling up and clutching his midsection!

MN: Now what the hell is Cross doing?

DM: Looks to me like he's heading for the top rope!

The crowd buzzes as Cross reaches the top in the corner, and he leaps off towards Douglas...

DT: Massive elbow drop from Cross, deep into the heart of Troy Douglas! It's all about the high impact offense tonight, folks!

DM: And there's a pin!

ONE!

TWO!

THR.... KICKOUT!!

DT: And Douglas isn't ready to give up yet!

Cross pulls Douglas to his feet, and fires him across the ring into the corner, and follows him in, nailing Douglas with a hard clothesline! Douglas doubles over in the corner, holding on to the top ropes for support, and Cross steps back, before driving a huge uppercut into Douglas' face! The official warns Cross about using the closed fist, but Cross just ignores him and plants Douglas into the mat with a double arm DDT, and makes a cover!

ONE!

TWO!

KICKOUT!!

DT: Cross gets Douglas back up to a vertical base, and whips him to the ropes. Douglas rebounds, and Cross absolutely NAILS him with a sidewalk slam! There's another cover!

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

DM: NO!! DOUGLAS GOT THE FOOT ON THE ROPES!

Cross takes a moment to question the official, thinking that he should have had the match won, but the official confirms with Cross that he did indeed see Douglas get his foot on the ropes. Cross shakes his head and turns around to pick Douglas up again, but as he does, Douglas manages to take Cross down with a jaw buster!

MN: DOUGLAS LIVES!

Douglas gets to his feet and shakes out the cobwebs, before pulling Cross back to his feet. Douglas boots Cross in the guts....

DT: Diamond Cutter!

DM: NO WAY! Cross shoved Douglas off to the ropes!

DT: There's a boot to the guts by Cross! He hooks him in!

MN: GOLGOTHA!!!

DT: Cross just nailed Troy Douglas with Golgotha! This one's gotta be over!

Cross makes the pin, and the official makes the count!

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!!!

The official calls for the bell, and "Jesus Walks" by Kanye West blasts over the PA!

TF: Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of this match by pinfall... CROSS!!!

DT: And overwhelming victory for Cross and just in time too.

DM: Yeah, Cross has had some bad luck for sure lately with this Dis 2 character chasing him around while trying to get prepared for a shot at the World Title.

DT: Well, speaking of that title, the World Champion is still set to make her appearance tonight, but when we come back, we'll see some more action from prospective Television title holders!

(Cue up a commercial for EPW Russian Roulette on DVD!)
 

DBrunkGXW

Consigliere
Joined
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Messages
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Points
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Age
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Location
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(Sunny Day by Zug Island began to play on the arena’s PA system. It was unfamiliar theme music to the fans of EPW, which only meant that a new wrestler had come to EPW. The crowd kept their attention towards the entrance as he finally stepped out and showed his face. Some may have known who he was, and some had no clue. Those that knew the face hated him, as they knew what he was all about to the wrestling world. Jack Owyns walked out from behind the curtain, and came to a stop inches away from the entrance. He was already prepared, as he held a mic in his right hand. He pushed his sunglasses up onto his head. Jack took a few moments to let the new scenery set in, as his eyes were drawn towards the new crowd, the new wrestling promotion.

At this moment, he had a choice, a choice to be the good person or the bad person. He broke his silence...)

Jack Owyns: Whether or not you like me, or hate me, I‘m here. The newest edition to Empire Pro Wrestling and guess what? From now on, I’m going to make every day here a bad day for you all.

(cheap response from the crowd)

Jack Owyns: Want to know why? Well it’s kind of on a more personal note that honestly is none of your business, and I don’t really feel like telling you my life-long story as to why.

(Owyns began to pace back and forth)

Jack Owyns: So make sure you sit in your seats and cherish this moment, because moments like this don’t come often here.

(He let a smile slip onto his face. )

Jack Owyns: Why don’t we do this so I can kick off my new legacy here in EPW. On the next Aggression, I will face anybody on the EPW roster in a match. Sound good?

(He came to a stop, as he turned back towards the crowd.)

Jack Owyns: Well actually your opinions don’t even matter. A housewife’s opinion matters more than yours, which is quite sad really since they’re already the scum of the world.

(He chuckled at his own sense of humor)

Jack Owyns: So book it and I will come and teach this wrestling promotion a few new things.

(Owyns dropped the mic and pulled his sunglasses back down over his eyes as he left the stage.)

DT: That was certainly... interesting.

MN: (rushing back to his seat, a plate of nachos in his hand) Did I miss anything?

DM: New guy.

MN: Any good?

(Dean shrugs)



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


X-Ecutioner vs. Damian Stone

DT: We’ll all get our chance to see Jack Owyns in action next week I’m sure, but right now we go to match number two in the TV Title pool as Damian Stone takes on former tag team specialist, X-Ecutioner.

TF: Th’ following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first, weighing in at two hundred eighty five pounds, and hailing from Death Valley...

(CUE UP: "Step Up: by Drowning Pool. X-Ecutioner comes to the ring focused, as the crowd jeers)

TONY FATORA: This is... XXXXXXXXX-EEEEEEEEECCCCCCCCCCCCCUUUUUUUUUTTTTTTTIIIIIIIIIOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!

DT: X-Ecutioner is back in action tonight. It’s been a while since we’ve seen him, but he looks in good shape.

DM: He’s better known here as a tag-team man with Golem, and I was surprised we didn’t see them at Russian Roulette. He’s going to have it hard tonight, though. Damien Storm is no slouch in the ring.

(CUE UP: "King Nothing" by Metallica. Out walks Echo, Damian's wife, dancing to the song. As the heavy guitar and drum beat kicks in, Echo approaches the center of the stage. As she does, she throws her arms out in a crucifix pose as the lights go straight to black. Red laser lights begin to dance around the arena as we see video of Damian Stone kicking tail and taking names in all sorts of demonic and normal matches. As the main beat suddenly kicks in, pyro explodes and red lights engulf the arena as, now behind Echo, we see Damian Stone, his arms out in a crucifix pose. Damian looks around the arena as the crowd cheers him on. Echo first begins to walk down the isle as Damian stands on the stage.)

TF: Being accompanied by his wife, Echo, he weighs in at three hundred forty five pounds, and hails from St Louis, Missouri... DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNN... SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEE!!!

DM: X-ecutioner is in unfamiliar territory here. He gives up five inches and sixty pounds to Damien Stone, plus he’s coming off of the break-up of his team with Golem, so this will prove a challenge.

MN: Not to mention trying to keep his eyes offa Echo there.

DT: Just don’t crack any of the awful jokes I see you have written in front of you.

MN: What do you mean written? My material’s grade A improve.

DT: If you say so. There’s the bell, and both men standing in the center of the ring sizing the other man up. Stone lifts a hand up, and he’s calling straight away for the test of strength! X-Ecutioner accepts, and they’re locked together now, Stone with the height advantage but X-ecutioner not budging.

DM: Both guys are known for their power moves, but Damien also has a lot more experience inside the ring, winning a lot of titles in his career. He’s starting to force X-Ecutioner down there, twisting the wrists to apply more pressure.

DT: X-Ecutioner fighting back, scores with a knee lift and a hard forearm shot to the head. A side headlock from the big-man, but Stone pushes him off, and on the rebound it’s X-Ecutioner who takes Stone down with a BIG flying shoulder tackle.

DM: I think X-Ecutioner learned in the initial lock-up he’s not quite as strong as Stone, so he’s going to move a little quicker than normal, and that flying shoulder saved him a lot of energy. Normally you see two big men collide a few times, but that worked far better as X-Ecutioner now with a clubbing blow to the back of Stone, followed by an Irish whip there into the corner and the splash.

DT: X-Ecutioner keeping up the pace with a bulldog there, into a quick cover... kickout before one. Stone’s too fresh.

MN: You’d think with Echo for a wife he wouldn’t be so fresh.

DT: Will you PLEASE grow up?

MN: Not if I can help it.

DM: X-Ecutioner being as relentless with his offence as Mike is being offensive now

MN: HEY!!

DT: A hard side suplex there takes Stone down. X-Ecutioner picks him up and whips Stone off again. X-Ecutioner catches him but Stone clubs him down before anything could happen there. Stone picking X-Ecutioner up now and a HUGE slam there taking down the man from Death Valley.

DM: You could see X-Ecutioner setting up for a big move, but rarely in EPW has he had to do that against a man that size.

DT: Stone with a hard right hand as X-Ecutioner tries to get to his feet. Damien Stone sizing the smaller man up, and a big boot takes X-Ecutioner down there. Stone goes for the cover, but a kickout at one stops the count.

DM: Fairly even at this time, it’s gonna take something big in there to separate these two.

DT: Stone now applying a chin lock on the canvas, but X-Ecutioner won’t give it up. He’s trying to fight to his feet, not letting Stone cinch in that hold, but Stone drops him with a hard shot to the back there. He goes back to the chin lock, but X-Ecutioner still trying to fight this.

DM: He manages to get to his feet, and ducks under the forearm of Stone there, slamming him down hard with a sidewalk slam there!! A two count only, but X-Ecutioner stays on the attack whipping Stone into the corner. Running clothesline into the corner, and he climbs behind Stone to the second rope. Looking for a big move here... NO!! Stone anticipated, shifted his position and caught X-Ecutioner as he went looking for the missile dropkick!!

MN: Echo looked happy with that one. That snake-eyes had eyes only for her!!

DT: If anyone else finds him funny, please write to us.

MN: I’m just saying he dropped X-Ecutioner on the corner where Echo’s standing.

DT: Damien Stone now running the ropes, but he misses!! Stone went for the Duel Strike, but X-Ecutioner hit the mat after the snake eyes before Stone could get back to him. Was that strategy or did Stone do that?

MN: Was that strategy or did Stone do that?

DT: I am NOT falling for it, Mike. I can see it on your plan.

MN: What?

DM: I think that was partially due to Stone. Stone now picking the smaller man up, slamming him down with a sidewalk slam. One..

Two...

Kickout before three there. Stone having it his own way right now.

DT: This is a big match for both men, and Stone locks X-Ecutioner in a straightjacket!! Stone pulling back on the arms as X-Ecutioner tries to fight the pain.

DM: This move not only works on the shoulder, it can also if applied properly choke an opponent out. It can be used like a sleeper-hold, which is why it’s not illegal, although a lot of people have called for referees to be harsher with this hold than others.

DT: X-Ecutioner trying to fight out, but Stone releases the hold and lands a big elbow to the head there. Stone now measuring his opponent... MISSED with the legdrop. X-Ecutioner catches a break and Echo looks concerned on the outside for her husband!!

MN: Belly ta bellah suplex!!

DT: X-Ecutioner with the suplex there and he’s looking to build on the advantage, but you can tell he’s in pain. Big clothesline there, followed by two hard stomps to the back of the neck. X-Ecutioner has Stone up, and he takes him down with a hard slam. The cover... two count only. X-Ecutioner feeling it now, sends Stone into the corner. Kick to the gut, as he climbs the turnbuckles. Hooks Stone’s head, going for the bulldog... NO!! Stone pushes X-Ecutioner off in mid-air!! X-Ecutioner tries to get up, but Stone has him in a half-nelson... ONE WINGED ANGEL!! That half-nelson side slam of Damien Stone’s connects!!

...One...

...Two...

THREE!!! Damien Stone wins it!!

(sfx: dingdingdingding)

TONY FATORA: Th’ winner of the match... DAAAMIAN STONE!


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Damian Stone walks over to the edge of the ring to the announcer. He reaches out with his right hand and the announcer hands him the microphone. After taking the microphone, he looks toward the crowd and then toward the backstage area. Damian makes a slashing motion across his throat and begins to speak)

D: Hey, cut the music.

(King Nothing vanishes from the PA system as Damian stands there, the crowd cheering at him)

D: I hope you get the message, X. And I hope you understand that this wasn't really personal. It was more of a learning experience...for you, of course.

(Stone takes his foot and pushes X out of the ring, onto the cold floor. Damian then focuses on the crowd)

D: Folks, I can't say it any clearer than this: no man...and I MEAN NO MAN can stop me when it comes to the Television Title and the tournament. Folks, look at it. The only true threat to this whole thing against me walking out with the title is Benji. But you know what, anything can and will happen. But I like to bend that part of the game...the anything part. Anything I do...anything....I can...I will prove to everyone that I am not just a threat to the TV Title anymore. Soon, I'll be looking at someone else's door. Soon...I'll be a-knocking against that door. Then...well....I'll be kicking that sondabti*** straight down. I don't care if it's "The Messiah" or The "Queen of the Ring." ALL OF THEM will end up the same way...face up...looking blankly in the sky as my hand is raised. You want to talk about true terror? You want to talk about mass destruction? YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT A MONSTER?!?!?!

YOU ARE LOOKING AT IT! AND THAT IS REALITY!

(D tosses the mic behind him, letting it hit the mat as King Nothing by Metallica begisn to blast over the PA again)

DT: Well folks, Damian Stone has certainly stated his case tonight with a resounding win over X-ecutioner.

DM: Stone is a monster, Thomas. Just a monster.

DT: It’ll be interesting to see how far he can go in his pursuit for gold. We’ll be right back after this with Sebastian Dodd and Cameron Cruise for the Intercontinental Title!! After this!

(Cue up a commercial for Microsoft Windows XP, v.666, featuring Satanic bugs!)
 

DBrunkGXW

Consigliere
Joined
Sep 11, 1997
Messages
4,814
Points
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Age
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Location
Katy, TX
(We see Dan Ryan’s office in the backstage area of the FedEx Forum. Ryan sits in his office chair shuffling through some papers. Ryan smiles as he holds a pen in his right hand and signs. A buzz is heard.)

Ryan: Yes?

(A voice on the other end of the speaker phone speaks back.)

Voice: Mr. Ryan, Paul Freeman has arrived and is waiting out here in the foyer.

Ryan: Wonderful, send our faithful commissioner right in.

(The feed clicks off and in moments the door swings open to show EPW Commissioner Paul Freeman walking in, manila folder in hand)

Ryan: How’s it goin’ Paulie?

Freeman: (smiling) Wonderful, got something you might be interested in. I’ve managed to sign a rather important star to an Empire Pro contract.

Ryan: I thought I made it clear that I didn’t want you meddling in the business side of things anymore, Paul.

Freeman: (still grinning) True, but hear me out. Technically I still have contract signing powers and I think you’ll like this one.

Ryan: Trying to win brownie points are we?

Freeman: Something like that.

(Freeman catches a glance of Ryan’s desk.)

Freeman: Wait... you sign someone too?

(Ryan smirks a bit and leans back.)

Ryan: As a matter of fact I did... filling out the tag ranks a little bit.

Freeman: Anyone I know?

Ryan: If you were smart you would, so no probably not.

Freeman: (annoyed) Right... so who is it?

Ryan: Well, I spent some downtime in Detroit last week. It just so happens that I ran in Max Mayhem at a local gym.

Freeman: Max Mayhem?? Like from the Motor City Maniacs Max Mayhem?

Ryan: The one and the same. You know how these things go. One thing leads to another and boom... the Maniacs are under contract to Empire Pro as of about five minutes ago.

Freeman: (Regaining his smile) Well boss, I think I’ve got something even better.

Ryan: (leaning back and relaxing in his chair) I find that hard to believe.

Freeman: (handing his folder to Ryan) See for yourself.

(Ryan takes the folder and opens it up. After a few moments his face freezes and his eyes dart back up at Freeman, who’s beaming.)

Ryan: Uh..Paul?

(Freeman just smiles smugly)

Ryan: Paul, this says you signed Hornet.

Freeman: (through a smile that threatens to pull a muscle in Freeman’s face) That is correct.

Ryan: You signed Hornet?? You... signed Hornet?

Freeman: (smugly) That... is correct.

Ryan: You mean to tell me you just called Paul up on the phone and offered him a contract and he accepted?..Just like that?

Freeman: Well, no not exactly. As a matter of fact... he came to me…or at least, his agent did.

Ryan: His agent...

Freeman: Yeah, short guy...kinda starting to bald.

Ryan: You didn’t meet with Paul personally?

Freeman: Well... no not really. But I’ve got all the necessary paperwork right in the folder. It’s all legit I promise. (Ryan sifts through the paperwork once more and his brows furrow as he concentrates on what he reads.) Ryan: Hmm... so it would seem. I promise you though, I’ll check into this and if you’ve done what you say you’ve done...

Freeman: I can have my old job back?

Ryan: Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. I might consider giving you your parking spot back...and maybe I’ll stop the big guy on security from tossing you in the dumpster behind the offices.

Freeman: (after a sigh) Yes sir.

Ryan: Well, Mr. Freeman this has been an interesting meeting. I’ll call you on the road after the show.

(Freeman nods and turns to walk out the door, the click signaling the resumption of privacy as Ryan looks down at the folder once more.)

Ryan: Interesting indeed...

(cue up a commercial for the new Emo Boyz CD "My Girlfriend Broke Up with Me and Now I'm Crying.")
 

DBrunkGXW

Consigliere
Joined
Sep 11, 1997
Messages
4,814
Points
36
Age
46
Location
Katy, TX
EPW Intercontinental Championship
"The Messiah" Sebastian Dodd (c) vs. Cameron Cruise

DT: We’re back and quite honestly I don’t know what to make of that exchange between Dan Ryan and Paul Freeman. The Motor City Maniacs are a huge signing, but Hornet in Empire Pro?? DM: Talk about a coup. Freeman may have saved his job if this one’s legit.

MN: Bah! Hornet’s old as dirt. Haven’t we filled our quota with Melton?

DT: We’ll have to wait and see what comes of it, but right now we’re gonna go up to ring as Sebastian Dodd defends his Intercontinental Title against Cameron Cruise!!

TF: This match is for one fall and is for the EPW Intercontinental Championship!! Introducing first….

(Cue up: “Headstrong” by Trapt.)

TF: Weighing in at two hundred forty-nine pounds, from Jacksonville, North Carolina….one half of the Cameron Cruise Project…..CAMMMERRROOOOOONNN CRUUUUUUUUISSEE!!!!!!

(Cruise steps out onto the stage to a loud face reaction from the Memphis crowd. Cam slaps hands with a few fans on his way down but otherwise keeps his focus squarely on the ring until he reaches the apron, where he rolls in under the bottom rope and kneels mid-ring – pyro erupting behind him.)

DT: Cameron Cruise is in top form tonight as he takes his shot at singles gold, and I’ve gotta wonder why Sebastian Dodd has been so quiet as of late.

DM: It’s no secret around the sport that Dodd has had some difficulties in his personal life as of late, but I expect a strong champion here tonight.

(Cue up: “Stellar” by Incubus)

TF: Introducing, from New York New York...he stands 6 feet, 2 inches tall and weighs in at two hundred forty-five pounds and is the EPW Intercontinental Champion….. this is "Your Hero" Sebastian Dodd!

Meet me in outer space
WE could spend the night
Watch the earth come up

(Dodd stands confidently at the top of the stage surveying the crowd, he extends his hand to wave to the crowd in a manner which is, clearly pandering at a group he has great disdain for as Stellar continues to play.)

I've grown tired of that place
Won't you come with me?
WE could start again

(Dodd walks down the aisle with a stride that is more arrogant than confident, appearing to slap hands with fans, then pulling away in disgust.)

How do you do it?
Make me feel like I do
How do you do it?
It's better than I ever knew

(Dodd tests the ropes, and goes to a neutral corner ready for the match.)

(SFX: Bell rings)

DT: And this one is underway!! Dodd and Cruise are circling each other and tease a lockup, but Dodd steps back and leans into the ropes…

MN: He just wants a few more seconds to loosen up. Nothin’ wrong with that.

DT: Dodd comes back into the center of the ring and now we have the locku….well, no Dodd ducks away again and pulls on the ropes. For cryin’ out loud!

MN: Would you begrudge a man his warm-ups? He could get a cramp!

DM: Mind games 101 from the champ here, fellas.

DT: Dodd back to the center of the ring and this time Cruise wastes no time!! Right to the head! Another! Whip to the ropes and a clothesline sends Dodd to the mat and rolling out of the ring to collect himself!

MN: Cameron Cruise is an obvious cheat, attacking a man during warm-ups? Where’s the sanctity?

DT: Dodd strolling around the ringpost on the outside, but he’s met by Cameron Cruise coming over the top rope with a plancha!! Both men down, but Sebastian Dodd obviously got the worst of that exchange!

DM: Nice aerial work from the challenger early on. It’s gonna take some risks like that connecting for Cruise to take the strap.

DT: Cruise back to his feet and he pulls Dodd up and rolls him into the ring. Cruise up on the apron and he’s going up top!

DM: I know I said to take some risks, but this might be a bit early for this!

DT: Cruise on the top rope and Sebastian Dodd is up! Cruise leaps off and drills him with a missile dropkick!! The Intercontinental champ goes flying!!

MN: Cam would so be my hero if he wasn’t such a fag.

DT: Dodd pulling himself up by the ropes, but Cruise is right there! Right to the head! Left! Right! Dodd slumping against the ropes! Cruise takes a few steps back…charging in and nobody home!! Dodd leaps up to the top turnbuckle! Sunset flip!!

ONE!!

TWO!!

NO!! Cruise slips out! Dodd now on the attack!! Boot to the midsection! DDT!! Another cover!

ONE!

NO!! Cruise kicks out with force this time!!

DM: The tide has turned rather forcefully all of a sudden. Dodd is not one to be taken lightly.

DT: Dodd helps Cruise to his feet…whip to the ropes….Dodd drops to a chest first position on the mat, Cruise leaps over and hits the other side…Dodd up…HUGE SIDEWALK SLAM!! Dodd with a elbow across the chest! Another!

MN: Yeah!! Punish him!!

DT: Dodd back up and he goes to the ropes…legdrop across the throat!!

MN: WHATCHA GONNA DO?!

DT: Here’s a cover!!

ONE!!

TWO!!

TH….NO!!! Cruise slips out just in time!!

DM: Quite the barrage of offense from Dodd! He’s a man on fire right now!

DT: Dodd roughly pulls Cruise to his feet! Snap suplex!! Another cover!

ONE!

TWO!!

A kickout this time!!

DM: There’s not shortness of fight in Cameron Cruise, I can tell you that much!

DT: Dodd back up and….hold on a second…what’s this???

(Someone in a dark black mask jumps over the railing and crouches down by the ring.)

DT: There’s someone here at ringside, but who is it??

DM: Not a big guy…

MN: Enough with the damn masked men already!!

DT: Dodd pulling Cruise to his feet again…..setting him up for a German Suplex but Cruise hooks the leg!! Again! Cruise slips around and shoves Dodd away….Dodd turns around right into a superkick from Cameron Cruise!!

DM: He just about took the champion’s head off!

DT: Cruise back up!! Dodd slowly coming to his feet! Cruise grabs Dodd by the back of his head and shoves him into the ropes!! Cruise off the opposite ropes, leaps up and springs off with a cross body….NO!! Dodd caught him! He caught him! Dodd struggling….Cruise shifting his bodyweight and BRINGS DODD DOWN HARD WITH THAT HIGH IMPACT DDT!!!! KIP UP!! THE CROWD IS GOING NUTS!!!

MN: Oh you’ve gotta be kidding me!!!!

DM: The kid’s on fire!!

DT: Cruise pulls Dodd up, he’s got him hooked!! Could we see the Shipwreck!! He’s got Dodd up on his shoulder….WAIT A SECOND!!

(Boos)

DT: That man in the black mask just pulled on Dodd’s legs and dropped him out of position!! Cruise turning around confused….

MN: No, that’s his normal face….

DT: He sees the guy in the mask and the masked man just darts off into the crowd!! Cruise is furious!!

DM: He better pay attention to…

DT: Dodd from behind with a double axehandle and Cruise goes down!

DM: Too late.

DT: Dodd stomping away at Cruise! Cruise trying to fight back! Legsweep by the challenger!! Both men down!! Cruise is up by the ropes….he charges in with a dropkick…NO!! Dodd catches the legs and turns him down into a Boston Crab!!! Cruise shifting his body and reverses it…CRUISE CONTROL!! CRUISE CONTROL!!! He’s got it locked in!!

MN: NO!!

DM: This could be it, but they’re awfully close to the ropes!!

DT: Cruise pulling hard on the neck of Sebastian Dodd but Dodd is just inches from that bottom rope aaaannnd….yes!…he grabs it and the referee calls for the break!!

MN: Whew….

DT: Cruise back up and over to Dodd….trying to drag the champion back out to the middle of the ring….Dodd swings his leg around and catches Cruise flush in the face!! Cruise down….Dodd stepping over….he’s got the Heroe’s End locked in….NO!! Cruise shoves with all his strength…Dodd stumbles off…Cruise to a knee……Dodd comes in…CRUISE UP….SHIPWRECK!! SHIPWRECK OUT OF NOWHERE!!!!

MN: STOP THE MATCH!! STOP THE MATCH!!!

DT: Here’s the cover!!

ONE!!

TWO!!

THREE!! WE HAVE A NEW INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION!!!!!

MN: GODDAMMIT!!

DT & DM: FAMILY SHOW!!

TF: The winner of this match….and NEEEEWWWW EPW INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION….CAAAAMMMMERROOOOOON CRUUUUUUUUISSSEE!!!!!

(Cruise stumbles to his feet as he’s handed his newly won belt and smiles broadly, shooting his hand into the air as the crowd cheers wildly.)

DM: I gotta say, Cruise put on a pretty impressive show tonight guys. He’s on his way to breaking back into the singles scene pretty forcefully.

DT: You’ve gotta wonder how Joey Melton feels about this right about now.

MN: Ungrateful little bastard.

DT: Tsk Tsk, Mike. Speaking of Melton I’m being told we’ve got something going on backstage….let’s get to that now…



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Unifier, Joey Melton, one of Carnival’s biggest attractions, and a Saint in poverty stricken corners of Beverly Hills, lazily skates into a back hallway of the Memphis Center. Two-thirds of the former EPW Tag Team Champions throws his head back and downs the last of a Veggie shake painstakingly conceived before the show by a black market juicer Melton smuggled in from Malta on the last leg of his May Carnival run. You can’t get the good **** in America. Never.

It was a great cruise for the former sexual All-American. He took ten of twelve matches from Adrian Evans, and old CSWA vet Safari Sakan—now a life insurance claims adjuster in Bolivia. It’s a hard life. One minute you’re jobbing for Mark Windham in a program back in the early 90s, today you’re squeezing the best deal from a militant with suicidal tendencies. Sakan was bored with his job, three wives, and beachside hut. Who wouldn’t be really? Owed thousands by Melton in gambling debts, Safari made the call, and booked the cruise to see the world for the first time. Sure, Sakan’s traveled, but when you’re on your back five nights a week it lessens the experience—unless you’re Mae West, or another of Troy Windham’s whores. The former CSWA US Champion was free to love the Earth as much as he could.

Sakan clearly rusty and weighed down by the expectations of his twelve kids in attendance was barely more than a stiff board for Joey to mold into an entertaining shape for the drunken masses. Melton gracious in victory, helped carry Safari to the medical wing after ripping the vet’s ACL in an extended figure four. Melton never heard Adrian’s calls to release. Truth be told, greatness is all touch and feel. Knowing when to kill a Christian in the Coliseum, or let them survive to avenge in season two.

It was a fabulous cruise. Ten out of twelve to reclaim the World Junior title, and while he iced his knees before pulling into port, Melton watched a swarm of whales beach themselves for no apparent reason. If there’s a better life, he can’t fathom it.

But, Troy’s magically spry sailor is landlocked in Tennessee. The fruits of the juicer all Melton has as a reminder that for two weeks out of every ther month he’s a God to those who pay him to sail. He tosses the smoking glass into a trash bin, but stops cold before completely turning to leave.

“What have we here…”

Joey fishes into the bin pulling out a black mask a second later. He dusts it off, cracking it in the air before fitting it over his immaculate face.

“Lindsay’s just perverted enough to be down with this…”

“You son of a!” Cameron Cruise, his newly won IC belt fastened around his waist, charges at Melton, forcefully backing him up against the cement wall. “I oughta beat your ass...”

Cruise disgustedly yanks off the mask, and revels back from disappointment as his heart breaks. Joey Melton: Betrayer?

“Joey? You ass.”

“I thought we agreed no name calling on the flight in from Phoenix. Gimme that back, that might be the last weapon I have to melt Troy’s black heart.”

“What was that about tonight?”

“What was what about?”

“The mask, Melton! You tried to screw me!”

“You and I both know if I wanted to do that, I could have by now.”

“Eff off Melton!” Cruise decks Melton with a right hand. The new IC champion shaking from head to toe as he watches Joey’s body slide down the wall. “You’re a bastard.”

Melton jumps back to his feet and shoves Cruise back, cocking his right hand, but thinking twice about pulling the trigger. “Are you stoned, Cruise?”

“You’re a jealous bastard! You can’t stand it, can you? To see me win on my own.”

“I must be blind, because I haven’t seen it yet.”

Cameron throws another wild haymaker that just misses Melton. “Come on! Right now. I’ve put up with your **** for a year. It ends now!”

“What’d I do?!”

“You ran in! You know you ran in tonight. I just caught your dumb ass red handed.”

“You think that was me? Cruise…why would I run in on an IC title match? Your match!”

“You know I don’t need you anymore. And it makes you look even sadder than you.”

“You don’t need me? CRUISE, I CREATED YOU! I’M YOUR MAKER! BOW BEFORE ME!”

Cameron tackles Joey, wrestling him to the floor. Kin Hiroshi innocently stumbles onto the scene, and rushes to break the Project up before any more children cry, and the damage done to the team is irreversible.

“Peace! We must have peace!”

“Go f[bleep]ing bake some muffins, and leave Joey to me.”

“That’s not peace!”

“No, Kin, it’s not! You see what I have to deal with! The man’s as temperamental as a woman!”

“You’re the *****, Melton. If you had a problem with me, be man enough to come to my face.”

“I expect a little more sense, and sanity from the chump who’s been carried on my back for the better part of twelve months!”

“Carried? You came begging to me, because nobody else would give you the time of day! And I see why! You’re a backstabbing little *****, Melton. I’ve sat back, and said nothing as you controlled the spotlight. Because I once had respect for you. I played my part because we were making money hand over fist. I just never had the heart to tell you, it could’ve been anybody else.”

Melton jabs at Cruise again.

“You’re right. I could’ve taken Kin’s momma to the tag titles in this hell hole, and probably, with the sexual tension thrown in, grossed twice as more.”

“Momma Hiroshi does love you…”

“All I’ve heard recently is how the case against Allison went your way. How you’re stinking rich again. Why don’t you put your money, and legacy where your mouth is. Next show you and I one on one.”

“Cammy, you want me, in the squared circle? Now I know you’re toasted.”

“We’ll see who carries their weight. Two matches. Same partner. Kin. Yeah. Kin, you and I against a team of Ryan’s choosing, and Kin and Melton against another team. With judges to vote on who looked more spectacular.”

“Kin likes.”

“Cruise, winning has gone to your fat head. But you’re on. Hiroshi, next week you get the moment of a lifetime. You get to walk in the ring, and be bathed in Joey Melton’s immortal glory.”

Melton slaps Kin on his muffins as he storms off.

“Trust me,” Cruise says to Hiroshi as he begins in the opposite direction, “it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.”

Cruise hands Hiroshi the mask, and retreats. Slowly, Kin tries on the mask, and smiles.

It’s a perfect fit.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Joey Melton vs. Steve Savoy

(CUT TO: Announce booth)

DM: Looks like Kin’s up to his old tricks!!

DT: Apparently some cracks are forming amongst the Cameron Cruise Project, but nonetheless we have a new Intercontinental Champion and not only that…a hell of a match coming up between Steve Savoy and the man we just saw on the big screen, Joey Melton.

MN: Two sex machines in effect!

DT: Let’s go up to the ring….

TF: This match is scheduled for one fall!

(Cue up “Watching the Wheels.” Steve Savoy enters, flanked by Ron Artest and Ricky Williams. Crowd boos lustily.)

TF: Introducing first, from Orlando, Florida, he is accompanied by his associates in D.A.M.N., weighing in at 226 pounds… he is the Phenom… STEEEEEVE SAVOOOYYYY!

DT: Well, it looks like The Phenom has been revived from his frying pan-induced stupor.

MN: JA is a dirty rotten scoundrel! He should be kicked out of Empire Pro for that attack!

DM: Yeah, because that’s totally worse than kidnapping.

MN: That wasn’t kidnapping, that was consensual!

DM: Oh brother…

TF: And his opponent…

(Cue up “I Need a Hero.” Out comes Joey Melton to a HUGE pop.)

DT: Listen to that ovation for the first superstar in our circuit!

TF: …weighing in at 210 pounds, he is the first ever See-Ess-Dubya-Aye Champion, the baby daddy of the Empire Pro Champion, from New York City, the Sexual All-American… JOOOOOOEY MELLLLLLTON!

MN: I’m so jealous. I want to be Lindsay Troy’s baby’s daddy!

DM: I think that gravy train left the station a long time ago. Just ask Beast.

MN: No thanks. The less I have to talk to Big Loafy, the better.

DT: Melton is getting a hero’s welcome here in Memphis, Tennessee! He gets to the ring and Savoy is just looking annoyed at this welcome Melton’s getting.

MN: I would too if some dinosaur was getting cheered before me.

(DING DING DING!)

DT: Melton’s in the ring and… he unloads right away on The Phenom! Right hand, right hand, right hand, Savoy is stumbling back into the corner!

MN: Closed fist! Closed fist!

DM: Get over it, Neels.

DT: Melton’s winding up and… HORNET SPLASH! Taking a page out of one of his oldest rivals! The Phenom stumbles out of the corner and this crowd has gone bonkers!

MN: Stop the match! That move is banned in Memphis!

DM: Oh just shove it, Neels.

DT: Melton comes in with a driving fist to the back of Savoy’s head! Melton up, another driving fist, up and another! This crowd is electric!

MN: Throw some rubber on them, I don’t wanna get shocked.

DM: You’re lucky this isn’t a Dodd match, or else you would have gotten zapped plenty of times by now, you blaspheming blackguard.

DT: Melton’s got Savoy up now… snap suplex, Melton down for a cover with the quickness…

…one…

…two…

…Savoy kicks out.

MN: I would hope Ron Artest gets involved soon. This Melton needs to be stopped.

DT: Well, the way he’s come out of the gates here, the entire Indiana Pacers team could be here and not be able to stop him. Melton grabs Savoy by his head and whips him into the corner. Melton follows in.

DM: I smell BIG TROUBLE in Little Penis Land for Stevie Savoy here.

MN: You stop with the small wang talk!

DM: Okay, only after you hop off Savoy’s small junk.

MN: Argh!

DT: Melton perches Savoy on the top rope, he climbs up… SUPERPLEX! Melton crawls up, slowly, he’s covering Savoy…

…one…

…two…

…th… NO! NO! Savoy kicked out!

MN: He IS the man!

DM: Well, that was a hell of a bump to take, but he still needs to capitalize on it.

DT: Melton up slowly, he’s up, he’s got Savoy up, another vertical suplex set up… SLINGSHOT SUPLEX! I think Melton’s going to go for the figure four here!

MN: NO!

DM: Oh shove it, this crowd is about to explode!

DT: Melton bends down… NO! NO! NO! Savoy counters with a small package…

DM: Heh heh, small package…

MN: SHUT UP!

DT: One…

…two…

…Melton kicks out!

DM: That was almost a flash pin if I ever saw one.

DT: And now Melton is up, Savoy slower, Melton’s going to… NO! The Phenom with a punch to the gut, Savoy up beside him and side Russian leg sweep! Savoy rolls over, gasping for a breather.

DM: Well, he’s turned the tides, but can he get the advantage, much like you get when you sign up for a rewards credit card from Capital One?

MN: sigh…

DT: Savoy and Melton both up, and Savoy QUICKLY nails Melton with a DDT. He covers…

…one…

…two…

…but Melton kicks out.

MN: The Phenom is back in business!

DT: That he is, Savoy up, and now, he’s got Melton up. Irish whip into the corner, Melton lands hard. Savoy over to the corner, climbs up over Melton and raises his fist!

DM: Oh they don’t approve of this!

DT: Savoy in with one right, two… and the crowd is refusing to count!

MN: If they won’t, I will! Three! Four! Five! Six! Seven! Eight! Nine… ten!

DM: Shameless, Neels.

MN: You’re one to talk.

DM: Yeah, but at least I’m getting paid for my shamelessness.

DT: Savoy dismounts, Melton plops to the canvas. Savoy gets him up and… MANHATTAN DROP! Cover…

…one…

…two…

…thr… NO! Melton kicks out!

DM: This crowd is getting behind the Unifier!

MN: Well, the ladies in the crowd at least had better hope he doesn’t get behind them.

DM: Oh Neels, how inappropriate.

DT: Savoy up, and… wait a second, there’s a rustling in the crowd… it’s JA! He’s in the front section right behind Savoy, but The Phenom doesn’t see him! He’s got Melton up and… oh, listen to the chant from the crowd!

CROWD: HUNG LIKE A MOUSE! (Clap clap clapclapclap) HUNG LIKE A MOUSE! (Clap clap clapclapclap)

MN: Shut them up!

DM: Haha, I love it!

DT: Savoy’s distracted! He’s livid, trying to find out who’s leading that chant… Williams and Artest see JA! They’re going over to him… and MELTON ROLLS UP SAVOY…

…one…

…two…

…THREE!

(DING DING DING!)

TF: Here’s your winner by pinfall… JOOOOEY MELLLLLLLTON!!!



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

DT: Artest and Williams are rushing over to the stands, Savoy’s up and he’s livid… wait a second, JA hops up on the guardrail and PLANCHA ON BOTH RON ARTEST AND RICKY WILLIAMS! JA just wiped out two-thirds of D.A.M.N. right there with one move! JA’s about to get up but…

(CRACK!)

MN: YES! Take that you masked freak!

DT: Oh my Lord! Savoy just cracked JA across the head with that steel chair! And he’s continuing to lay into him! Crack after crack… oh my God, someone stop him! And now Artest and Williams are up, and they’re stomping on him… oh good! Here comes Bill Laimbeer!

DM: This may be too little too late and too outnumbered.

DT: Laimbeer rushes in and… ARTEST LAYS HIM OUT WITH A CLOTHESLINE! And now Savoy cracks the Original Bad Boy over the head with the chair before coming back to JA… here come the roving band of refs and security… finally, they pull Savoy off of JA… oh my…

MN: Sweet revenge! Haha, I love it.

DM: Neels, you sick freak, JA did not deserve that.

MN: Yes he did, for humiliating Steve Savoy, The Phenom, he did.

DM: Dumbass, did you not see what Savoy did to JA last week? This is just horrible.

DT: Well, while the security team takes Savoy backstage and the EMTs check on JA’s condition, we’ll pause for commercial break. If we get any word on JA’s condition, then we’ll pass it along to you.

(Cue up a commercial for Skeevy-nail Brand Toenail Clippers)
 

DBrunkGXW

Consigliere
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DT: We’re back from break and I’ve gotta tell ya, this is the one I’ve been waiting for all night.

DM: This one’s not for the title, but it’s a big one. This guy’s been a thorn in both Cross and Lindsay Troy’s side for a while now.

MN: Speaking of Cross, I know he knows who this second Dis guy is and he’s holding out on us. I’m still going with Troy Windham.

DM: Wasn’t that your guess for the first Dis, too?

MN: Yeah, so?

DM: That worked out pretty well doncha think?

MN: Shut up.

DT: Will we find out who the second Dis is tonight? Let’s go up to the ring for our main event!!!!!



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


MAIN EVENT
Non-Title Match
"Queen of the Ring" Lindsay Troy (c) vs. Dis II

TF: Ladies and gentlemen, this match is scheduled for one fall and is your MAAAIN EVEENT!!!!!!

(Crowd pop)

TF: Introducting first….

(A masked man steps out onto the main stage to the strains of “Hallowed Be Thy Name” by Iron Maiden, the former music used by Lindsay Troy under the “Dis” mask. Thunderous boos trumpet his arrival as he stalks menacingly straight to the ring without so much as a glance at the crowd.)

TF: From Parts Unknown….weight unknown…..this is….DDDDIIIISSSS TWWOOOO!!!!!!

(Dis 2 climbs into the ring and leans back in a corner.)

(CUE UP: “Money, Power, Respect” by Li’l Kim, The Lox & DMX to a mostly favorable ovation – but an ovation irregardless.)

TF: And his opponent…..from Tampa, Florida…weighing in at one hundred seventy pounds….she is the EPW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION…..THE QUEEN OF THE RING…..LIIIINNNDSSAAAAAAY TROOOOOYYYYY!!!!!

(Troy steps out onto the stage, pyro erupting all around her and staring directly into the eyes of the masked man in the ring. Troy pats the gold around her waist and raises a fist into the air as the crowd alternately cheers and boos.)

DT: There’s our World Champion…and this crowd can’t seem to decide if they like her or not!

DM: Well I’d say it was safe to say she was pretty well reviled last week what with that grandiose display for her first moments as champ, but with this Dis 2 character in the ring I think she’s getting some cheers for the sake of booing him.

(Troy makes it to the ring and climbs in. The referee takes the belt and proceeds to check Miss Troy’s boots and tights. He does the same for Dis 2.)

(SFX: Bell Rings)

DT: The bell rings and things are under….wait a second, what the hell??

(From the top of the stage a mysterious dry ice/smoke effect starts to billow out.)

DM: What’s with the smoke?

MN: You burn the popcorn again, Thomas??

(The smoke starts to dissipate, and behind is left a large box, a curtain across the front. Troy and Dis 2 look on in interest from the ring.)

DT: That’s not popcorn unless someone is REALLY hungry.

(Slowly the curtain on the front raises and once again we see the mysterious DIS THREE, complete with mask and evil-style cape, like some bizarre lucha. He raises the mic and speaks, his voice distorted.)

DIS THREE: MY FAIREST MAIDEN... I PRESENT YOU A PRESENT!!!!! (From the scaffolding, a narrow white box drops via a pulley type of device. Lindsay is apprehensive but opens the present. It's a large, black dildo.)

DIS THREE: NOW YOU CAN GO **** YOURSELF WITH THAT!!! AND EVEN IT WON'T BE AS FULFILLING AS WHEN YOU DRINK FROM MY CHALICEOF SUFFERING FOR YOUR SINS!!!!!!

DT: Sick!

MN: Yeah! Make her drink from the chalice!

(Dis 3 goes and sits back in the box and spins. The curtain mysteriously drops again. Lindsay charges up the ramp to the box, opens the curtain and sees no one inside – as the masked man has apparently vanished yet again. The dry ice smoke hits again, and Lindsay is confused as this time the box dissapears.)

DT: Lindsay Troy is standing at the top of the stage irate at this turn of events…and here comes Dis 2!! Dis 2 is charging up the ramp after her!...Troy turns, ducks a clothesline!! Dropkick to the masked man and he hits steel!!

DM: Dis 2 saw an opening and tried to capitalize but no dice!!

MN: And I thought Troy liked it from behind….

DT: Troy over to Dis 2 as he rises to his feet….open palm strike to the side of the head!! Kick to the ribs! Roundhouse kick to the head and Dis 2 hits the deck again!! Troy pulling him up and headed back to the ring!!

DM: Dis 2 better watch out for those feet. What Lindsay Troy lacks in brute strength she more than makes up for with athleticism and martial arts training.

DT: Troy gets him to the ring, rolls him back in and follows…Dis up, blocks a punch from Troy, throws one of his own….Troy ducks and slips underneath….full nelson….up with a full nelson sl….NO!! Dis reverses by hooking the leg….he goes down face first and sweeps Troy’s feet out from under her!! Troy on her face and Dis is wailing away on the back of her head!!

MN: That’ll teach her!!

DT: Dis up….and an elbow across the back of the head!! Another! Dis up now and going to the legs, he wraps them around one leg and falls back, snatching Troy in a facelock for the STF!!!

DM: One thing this Dis 2 character has shown in his short time here is his fondness for submission holds. He practically took Cross’ knee out with that figure four around the ringpost upon his first showing.

DT: Dis cranking back on the neck of the World Champion as Troy has a hand up fighting to get free! The referee is asking Troy for the submission but she’s shaking her head furiously and emphatically NO!!

DM: Well, as much as one can shake their head while in the STF.

DT: Dis 2 pulling back hard as Troy continues to fight and DIS TWO STARTS RAKING HIS FINGERNAILS ACROSS THE EYES OF TROY!!!

DM: Well that seemed a little uncalled for.

DT: Troy screaming out and the referee is now calling for the break!! He’s up to three….four….and we have a clean break.

MN: Give her a taste of her own medicine. Men have been getting clawed by women for years. It’s called payback.

DT: Dis 2 up and looking at the ref. Meanwhile Lindsay Troy is coming to a knee…Dis with a kick to the head and Troy goes flat on her back!!

DM: That distraction from the so-called Dis Three is really costing Troy right now. She’s taking a hell of a beating early on.

DT: Dis 2 pulls Troy to her feet…snap suplex!! Pulling her back up now, whip into the corner and charging in…. NO! Troy gets both boots up, leaning back on the turnbuckle!! Dis 2 stumbling back….turns around….Troy steps up onto the second turnbuckle and flies off with a big leg lariat….NO!! Dis 2 catches her!! Backbreaker and Lindsay Troy crumbles to the mat!!

DM: Just when you think Troy’s mounting a comeback!!

MN: She’s back on her back where she belongs! All that’s left is her legs in the air!

DT: Geez, Neely….

MN: Oh, like you wouldn’t hit it.

DT: Dis 2 over to the ropes, springboard and a leg across the throat!! The cover….ONE, TWO…..TROY GETS A FOOT ON THE ROPES!! Dis 2 to the corner, two hands on the ropes and he flings himself back with a body press….NOO!!! TROY GOT THE KNEES UP!!!

DM: Here’s the opening!!

DT: Dis 2 writhing around holding his midsection as Troy tries to bring herself to her feet….Dis 2 over and he’s met with an elbow to the midsection!!..Troy to her feet!! Lindsay Troy grabs Dis 2 by the arm and quickly heads up top and leaps off….TOP ROPE ARMBREAKER AND DIS 2 IS IN TREMENDOUS PAIN!!!

DM: Talk about your impressive maneuvers!! This young lady isn’t World Champ for nothin’!!

DT: Troy up and fired up!! She hits the ropes…front flip legdrop!! A cover!! ONE!! TWO!! NO!!! Dis 2 JUST KICKS OUT IN TIME!!

MN: Too close!!

DT: Troy back up again, lifting Dis 2 to his feet….underhook…..and PLANTS HIS FACE RIGHT INTO THE MAT!! TROY GOING UP TOP…SHOOTING STAR PRESS….INTO A FROG SPLASH!!! OHHHH MYYY GOOOODDD!!! THE COVER!!! ONE!!!! TWO!!! THREE!!!

NO!!!! Dis 2 got his arm out JUST IN TIME!! HOW THE HELL??

MN: I’m comin’ ‘Lizabeth!!

DM: I don’t know how Dis 2 got out of that pinfall but what an UNEBELIEVABLE MANEUVER FROM THE WORLD CHAMPION!!!!

DT: Troy back up!! She hits the ropes…NO!! SHE LEAPS AND SPRINGS OF THE MIDDLE ROPE WITH AN ASAI MOONSAULT BUT TO A DOWNED DIS 2!! ANOTHER COVER!! ONE!!! TWO!!!! AND….HOLD ON!!

(Someone dives into the ring and pulls Troy from the ring to the outside and start hammering away at her on the outside.)

DT: IT'S AJ CIRRUS!!! WHAT THE HELL?! I KNEW HE’D SIGNED A CONTRACT BUT WHAT’S HE DOING ATTACKING LINDSAY TROY?!

MN: AJ Cirrus?!?! Who?? WHAT?!?!

DM: Is this some sort of hold-over thing from A1E?? Why is he helping Dis 2 against Troy?

DT: Troy trying hard to fight back but Cirrus is on the offensive in a big way! Dis 2 is just leaning forward against the ropes….HERE HE COMES WITH A SLINGSHOT PLANCHA AND NOOOOO!!! LINDSAY TROY PULLED AJ CIRRUS INTO THE PATH OF THAT MOVE!! BOTH CIRRUS AND DIS 2 ARE DOWN!! TROY PULLS CIRRUS UP!! DRIVING SHOULDER TO THE GUT!! CIRRUS GOES BACK HARD AGAINST THE APRON!! SHE’S GOT DIS 2!! SHE’S GOING FOR THE MASK!!!

DM: Lindsay Troy has had enough!!!

DT: Troy furiously ripping at the mask in the back as Dis 2 fights to keep the mask on!! Cirrus up and charges!! Missed clothesline! One final pull and the MASK IS OFF!! THE MASK IS OFF AND IT’S KEN CLOVERLEAF!! IT’S KEN CLOVERLEAF!!!

MN: Holy crap!! It’s the Canadians!! They’re attacking!! Everyone under the desk!!

DM: What the?? (to Neely) Where the hell are you going??

DT: It’s Ken Cloverleaf and Lindsay Troy is standing there in shock!! Cloverleaf with a clotheline and Troy goes down like a shot!! Cirrus is back!! He’s got Troy locked into a full nelson and OHHH!!!! Cloverleaf with a superkick to Troy’s face and AJ Cirrus just lifted her up and over with a full nelson suplex on the floor!! Troy is in some real trouble!!

(SFX: Bell rings)

DM: I think this match is over with…..looks like our ref is calling for a no contest, but these two aren’t done yet!!



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

DT: Cloverleaf over to Troy and he’s rolling her in the ring and wishboning her around the post…..he’s gonna….somebody stop him!!

MN: Figure four around the post, baby!!

DT: Cloverleaf has it locked in and AJ Cirrus is on the inside wailing away at the World Champion with rights and lefts!!

(Overwhelming crowd pop as Cross comes charging down the aisle in street clothes.)

DT: Here comes Cross!! He’s in the ring, but AJ Cirrus sees him! Right hand from Cirrus blocked! Cross returns with a right hand!! Another!! Another!! He shoves Cirrus into the ropes….

DM: Cloverleaf’s releasing that figure four too and sneaking in behind Cross…

DT: Cross takes AJ Cirrus by the neck and tosses him HIGH OVER THE TOP ROPE TO THE FLOOR!!!

DM: Look out behind you!!

MN: SHHH!!

DT: Cloverleaf coming up behind Cross, spins him around and a haymaker is blocked!! Cross shoves Cloverleaf off the ropes and catches him with a vicious spinebuster!!! AJ Cirrus scrambling to his feet and climbing the top rope!! Cross turns around and catches a vicious missile dropkick right between the eyes!!! Cloverleaf up…turning Cross over….TEXAS CLOVERLEAF!!!

MN: Yeah baby!! Make him scream!!

DT: Cloverleaf cinching it in and pulling back as Cross clutches that bad knee!!

DM: That knee’s gonna snap!!

DT: Cloverleaf pulling back as Cirrus stomps away on the knee!! Somebody get security out here!! For the love of GOD!!

MN: You’re no fun!

DT: Cloverleaf finally letting go of the hold but Lindsay Troy and Cross are both in a very bad way right now!! I can’t believe this damn Ken Cloverleaf!! WAIT?? NOW WHO THE HELL IS THIS???

(Someone leaps out of the stands and scrambles in under the ropes, just walking over to behind AJ Cirrus and Ken Cloverleaf – who are standing over the downed Cross.)

DM: Hold on just a second! That’s Steven Shane!! If I’m not mistake, he was Ken Cloverleaf’s long time tag partner!

DT: Shane’s just standing behind these guys…he’s tapping Cloverleaf on the shoulder!! Cloverleaf turns fist raised…and his face just went white!!

DM: Whoa!! Don’t think Mr. Shane was invited to the party!

DT: I’d say not!! Ken Cloverleaf hesitating here but CIRRUS IS ALL OVER SHANE!! LEFT FROM CIRRUS!! RIGHT FROM SHANE!! LEFT!! RIGHT!! Cloverleaf is still just standing here stunned!! Cloverleaf looking…turns…AND MY GOD ITS LINDSAY TROY FROM THE TOP ROPE!! SUPER HURRICANRANA!!!! KEN CLOVERLEAF GOES FLYING!!!!

MN: DEAR GOD SHE’S ALIVE???

DT: TROY ALL OVER CLOVERLEAF!! SHE’S RAINING DOWN LEFTS AND RIGHT AS STEVEN SHANE LIKEWISE GETS THE UPPERHAND ON AJ CIRRUS!!!!

DM: Cross is down and out, having slipped out of the ring but this is chaos right now!!!

DT: TROY WITH CLOVERLEAF UP AND TOSSES HIM HEADFIRST OVER THE TOP ROPE!!! SHANE DOES THE SAME WITH CIRRUS AND THIS PLACE IS GOING CRAZY!!

(Insane face pop)

DT: Troy is down to a knee from exhaustion and holding onto that right knee but she’s staring a hole in Ken Cloverleaf!! Shane looking back now and catching her gaze, and Troy gives a little nod!

DM: Don’t think that was part of the plan but I’m guessing Troy is quite happy with the result.

(Cloverleaf and AJ Cirrus regroup on the outside and start to back up the ramp.)

DT: What a way to end Aggression!! That’s it folks!! For Mike Neely and Dean Matthews, I’m Dave Thomas!! GOODNIGHT!!!!

(Shane and Troy stare out at the retreating Cirrus and Cloverleaf as Cross gets in the ring himself and stumbles to the center of the ring alongside them.)

FADE TO COPYRIGHT.

FIN
 
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