thegr817deuce
League Member
- Joined
- Jun 9, 2004
- Messages
- 438
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- 0
- Age
- 39
(Fade in, the bottom of a ladder that is clearly seen in the middle of a ring. The ladder slowly pans up to find both the left and right boots of a RELAXED Cameron Cruise, as the camera continues to pan up as he leans over the other side, carefully as to not fall off.)
CRUISE: Oh... why Good Evening ladies and Gentlemen...
And Beau too.
You know...when people get frustrated, most of 'em usually try and walk it off...or exercise it off... or just plain need to find a place to think.
Now in my case, I've gone and actually performed all three options, and wouldn't 'cha know it as of late....
(Cruise snaps his fingers as if to have an epiphany)
What you see around me...well..
(Cruise smiles)
This is mine.
However this is digressing a bit from what I've set aside time to do, and that's to assert and set the record straight on a few things.
Adam Benjamin.
Don't believe for a second that just because you managed to beat me a couple weeks ago that this actually MEANS something.
After all...I was just put through a table a few days before.
Even SUPERMAN needs some time to recover, but as far as I am concerned...the only thing short of hell and high water that's going to keep me from competing night in and night out is a hospital gurney or a threat of an arrest to go to jail.
Which even then... I wouldn't count on me taking the night off ANYWAY.
Irishred...hey, that's a different story. Everyone here knows he's soft on backin' up his words since becoming World Champion anyway...why don't you ask him yourself??
Hell, I wouldn't mind seeing him step it up ANYWAY, so be my guest.
Speaking of "Stepping it up"...this brings me to Dan...Ryan.
The idea of me receiving a paycheck from you on a regular basis aside, you've yet to even LISTEN to what I say.
Most people HEAR...but they never LISTEN.
Now the fact that everyone knows that you're a scholar and an ASSHOLE...we all know which one of the two categories you fall into; which means I have to say it once more, for your benefit.
YOUR......OWNERSHIP......OF......EMPIRE.....PRO... MEANS.......JACK****......IN......U...C...W.
In other words Dan, as far as I'm concerned...you might pay me on a regular basis in Empire Pro...but here in UCW...
As far as I can give a **** mind you...
You really don't rate any better than **** on a shoe on windy day.
But since I know you're so willing to object with your "Horse****" Championship you so proudly carry around with you...
Which by the way... is disgusting...
I'll give you an offer you can't--no wait--I know you won't refuse.
You and me at Civil War in a rematch from New Year's In Hell.
But this time...with a stipulation.
(The camera pan upwards in the direction Cruise is pointing.)
In this briefcase rests not one...but TWO contracts.
One of the contracts will contain legal papers that will find the man who wins this match temporary control over the other until the following Pay-Per-View.
That means, should I beat you...and if I decide to forfeit the other contract....your ass is mine for as long as it takes for you to make it to the Next Pay-Per-View.
Now what pray tell could be this other contract??
Just a standard contract that will make you the Center of the attention to the World Champion, that's all.
That's right Fatboy; the second contract is for the winner to become the next number one contender to the World Heavyweight Champion after Civil War in which the winner may use as quickly as the Revolution afterwards or at a later date.
No ifs, ands, or buts...One of us...if signed...will become the Number one contender.
But you have to focus on BEATING me in the middle of the ring first, which as of late, Dan...And let's be real about this for a second...
YOU...CAN'T...FINISH...THE...JOB!!
So do me a favor until then, Dan, and pray...that if I beat your carcass at Civil War, that I take the ladder and face the Champion.
'Cause God help you if I don't.
THAT Ego Buster, is a Reality Check that you just....won't like.
(Fadeout.)
(A long, black limo pulls into the arena.)
RC: Well, who the hell is this? I thought all the superstars were already here and ready for their matches this week.
DR: Well apparently, someone didn’t get the memo on the bell time for this week.
(The driver exits the limo and makes his way around the car to the passenger door. He opens it and a snakeskin boot appears from under the limo door.)
RB: How you guys be so moronic? Of course all the superstars with matches are here. But the number one contender doesn’t HAVE a match this week!
(The crowd gives Jonathan Marx a TON of heat as he appears on the screen.)
RC: Well, I certainly apologize for not considering the number one contender as I ran through the superstars in my head.
DR: You would also think that the number one contender-
RC: Look out! The UCW Champion, Irishred just came out of nowhere and blindsided Jonathan Marx!
RB: Look at this! This is certainly nothing like what a gentleman like Jonathan Marx would pull!
RC: Red is beating the hell out of Marx here as he has straddled over him on the concrete with those right hands!
DR: But Marx rolls it over! Hard right hands from the number one contender! Marx gets back up to his feet. He pulls Red along with him.
RC: Oh my! Red just went head first into that limo! He’s not stuck-
DR: Oh no! Jonathan Marx just slammed the champion’s torso in that car door that was still open!
RC: Marx pulls Red back up again. But there’s a right by Red! A right from Marx! They’re really going at one another here!
RB: Here comes the cavalry!
RC: A roving band of referees now making their way down as Red was really making a comeback against the number one contender that just slammed him in that car door! Well, I’m glad these refs got out here when they did to keep the main event at Civil War intact because who could tell what these two would have done to-
DR: Red broke free! He’s charging at Marx! They’re going at it again! Folks, we’ve got to try and stop this and take a quick commercial break! We haven't even had a match yet and the action is going wild! Don’t go anywhere!
------Commercial Break-------
The Ultra-tron suddenly comes to life and a hush falls over everyone.
(CUT TO: A shot of a silhouette of a man punching a heavy bag.)
(FADE IN: The word “HE”)
(CUT TO: A shot of the same silhouette doing a sit-up with a medicine ball.)
(FADE IN: The word “IS”)
(CUT TO: A shot of the silhouette standing afar with his arms crossed.)
(FADE IN: The word “COMING”)
(CUT TO: A shot of the silhouette walking towards the camera, but before hitting light, the shot explodes into the UCW logo.)
(FADE OUT.)
RC: Hello again folks! Welcome to UCW Revolution! You’ve already been introduced to a lot of great action, but I’m Rich Cruise, alongside Rob Bitterman and “The Doctor” Doug Ross to bring you yet another episode of the hottest show on television!
DR: It’s great to be here again, Rich. It seems like forever, but that’s only because we can’t wait to see what happens at each and every show of Revolution!
(“Wings of a Butterfly” by H.I.M hits over the PA and the crowd gives a big pop to Kin Hiroshi as he makes his way out from behind the curtain. He makes his way down the ramp and exchanges a few high fives along the way.)
RB: This guy really makes me sick. And it’s not because I had one of his muffins.
RC: Rob, I don’t see how you can say that. It’s really truly amazing that Hiroshi is even out here after the beating he took from Promo last week. I’m anxious to see how he holds up here tonight against The Ego Buster.
(Cue up: "Zero" by Smashing Pumpkins.)
(Thunderous crowd pop)
(CUT TO: 'Ego Buster' flashes across the screen in rapid contrasting black and white. CUT TO: Dan Ryan gorrilla presses Kevin Powers from inside the ring to the floor below. CUT TO: The word "YOU" flashes on the screen. CUT TO: Dan Ryan throws 'Living Legend' Mark Windham from the second level of Key Arena down to the first level. CUT TO: the word "ARE". CUT TO: Dan Ryan clotheslines 'Cocky' Craig Miles, nearly taking his head off. CUT TO: the word "BUSTED" CUT TO: rapid shots of Dan Ryan pulverizing opponents with the Humility Bomb, a last ride power bomb landing high angle on the neck.)
(Ryan walks down to ringside as pyro erupts along the ramp beside him. He rolls under the bottom rope and climbs a corner turnbuckle and simply glares through the sunglasses into the crowd.)
RB: No one holds up really well when they face this man! And you’re going to see it here tonight.
DR: Indeed, Ryan is one of the greatest this sport has ever seen. Hiroshi will have his hands full in this one.
RC: Well, they’re in the ring and ready to go. Let’s get this one underway!
DR: Lockup in the center of the ring, Hiroshi with a hammerlock, Ryan reverse to one of his own, Kin reverses followed by another Dan Ryan reversal with Hiroshi escaping with a jumping snap mare.
The crowd is quickly on their feet applauding the fast opening.
Both men quickly up to their feet, but The Ego-Buster shoves The Muffin Man down with a shoulder block.
RB: Hiroshi does not want to get into a power match here with Dan Ryan.
Hiroshi off the ropes, over with a cartwheel, and pulling Ryan into a monkey flip.
RC: No that is what Kin needs to do right there. He needs to use speed and agility to beat the much larger Dan Ryan.
Hiroshi with a kick, snap mare, headlock on the mat.
DR: Ryan's got his shoulders down...
1...
Kick out with authority by Dan Ryan as Kin flies into the air and lands on Ryan’s uplifted and bent knees.
RB: Ryan transitions into a head scissors, and clamps down hard. Hiroshi headstands out and kills Dan with a dropkick to the head! I think he killed him. Kin with quick cover again.
1...
No I guess he's not dead as he just threw Hiroshi off again.
Both men up and stalking each other and Hiroshi is working over Ryan with kicks to the back of the leg. Hiroshi tries to lock Ryan into an abdominal stretch but Ryan's far too close to the ropes to make this work, and after the hold is broken, Dan uses the opening to toss Hiroshi out of the ring by his tights.
DR: This is going to get ugly for The Muffin Man. He does not want to be outside facing the absolutely sadistic Dan Ryan. Ryan can not only take punishment the man knows now to dish it out like few others in the sport do.
Ryan out after Hiroshi and uses a Russian leg sweep to drive Kin into the steel barricade.
RC: Son of a ***** that had to hurt. Ryan has Hiroshi pressed over his head and the Muffin Man is tossed easily into the ring over the top rope. What a power display by Ryan.
The Ego Buster follows Hiroshi back in and drops The Hammer down to the back of Hiroshi‘s head. Knee drop, knee drop, knee drop, all to the head. Kin Hiroshi pulled up and forearmed down. Choke on the middle rope.
RC: Ryan is making an example of Kin here. He’s not giving Hiroshi a chance to even get his bearings here.
RB: The man is a ring general Cruise. He’s not some greenhorn just jumping into the game.
Dan Ryan off the ropes, jumping hip-check to the back, off the ropes, jumping hip-check to the back, off the ropes, jumping hip-check to the back.
DR: Three times the pleasure equals three times the fun folks. Dan Ryan is pissed off and he’s taking it out on the Muffin Man.
Dan off the far ropes and a running dropkick to Hiroshi's back!
One...
Two...
NO...Hiroshi manages to get his shoulder up.
RC: Really the man should just stay down. This is only going to get worse before it gets better.
Ryan with a rope assisted standing boot choke. Hiroshi brought up and then chopped down. The crowd appreciates that with a huge WHOO! Ryan grabs Hiroshi by the back of the head and gives him the bad mouth.
RB: I hope they have their hands on the censor button in the truck. Some of that language is not appropriate at all.
RC: Rob it’s no different then what you pay women to say to you.
Ryan slaps around Hiroshi, and Hiroshi fights back with shots to the midsection. Kin stopped by a knee to the head.
DR: Jesus!!! Hiroshi’s head just snapped off the mat there. I don’t know how but he is getting up.
Hiroshi battles to his feet and elbows out. Ryan tries to sneak in a suplex and gets pulled into a small package...
One...
Two...
Three... NO!!!
Dan Ryan pops up with a look of absolute shock on his face. He stalks Hiroshi.
DR: I don’t believe this. Hiroshi is actually motioning for Dan Ryan to come and get some.
RB: You know that he won’t have to ask twice.
Ryan with a chop. WHOOOO!!!
Hiroshi chest slap. WHOOOOO!!
RC: Ryan chop! Hiroshi chest! Hiroshi, Ryan, Hiroshi, Hiroshi, Hiroshi. The crowd is
going nuts here!!!
A Ryan eye rake to put an end to that nonsense. Whip to the far rope, head down too soon, and Hiroshi tries to kick it off, plus a wheel kick to knock him down.
Both men trying to get back up. Hiroshi up and shaking with rage. Ryan tries to punch him, and gets kicked hard in the side. Another kick to the left side, and another.
RC: What a comeback by The Muffin Man.
Dan Ryan with an Irish Whip, reversed, Hiroshi back with the running knee lift.
RB: Hiroshi is major pumped up here! Can he capitalize on the momentum?
RC: Whoa, German Suplex by Hiroshi!
One...
Two...
NO!!!
DR: No one saw THAT coming. Hiroshi arguing with the ref saying he wants a faster count.
Ryan pushed into the corner for chops. Corner whip, reversed, Ryan charges in, but Hiroshi's ready for him.
RB: AMAZING Frankensteiner by Hiroshi. Ryan is down and struggling to get to his feet. Hiroshi has him in his sites...
Hiroshi flexes his right leg and sets up -
RC: Super Kick is ducked! Dan Ryan grabs onto Hiroshi. He has him cinched in. OH MY GOD!!! Humility Bomb!
One...
Two...
Foot on the rope!
Ryan hooks the leg off the rope and tries again -
One...
Two...
NO!!!
Ryan pulls Hiroshi away from the ropes.
One...
Two...
NO!!
RC: I cannot believe this. Ryan has to be getting frustrated.
Ryan pulls Hiroshi up and hits a Front slam.
One...
Two...
NO!!
One...
Two...
NO!!!!!
RB: Dan Ryan pounds the mat in frustration. He is absolutely beside himself.
Ryan picks up Hiroshi and charges across the ring.
DR: SON OF A *****!!! Running Humility Bomb!! I think Kin is dead! Son of a *****!!!
One...
Two...
Three...
RC: Your winner by pin fall ladies and gentlemen is the Ego Buster Dan Ryan.
Ryan straddles Hiroshi and smiles over his fallen foe.
DR: Folks I think this is a message directed at one Cameron Cruise. I fear that THIS is Cruises reality.
RC: We've gotta take another commercial break! Don't go anywhere!
-----Commercial Break-----
[Cue up "The Wind Below."]
RC: Alright folks, welcome back to Revolution! It looks like we're going to get a visit from the commissioner.
[Ken Cloverleaf, with a smile beaming from his face, enters to a hail of boos.]
DR: Indeed we are, and I wonder if he's here to introduce the big signing that's been rumored since the last Revolution! was on the air.
RB: With a smile like that on his face, I'm damn sure he is. I mean, who wouldn't be happy to have scored the A1E World Heavyweight Champion!
[Cloverleaf struts into the ring and poses, oblivious to the boos.]
RC: Although I'm sure Damon Blackburn would lay claim to the title as soon as he walked in. Either way, I'm pumped.
DR: Well, remember, it was only a rumor.
RB: No, you heard the Commish's secretary! It was Mr. Anonymous who agreed verbally to sign a contract!
[Cloverleaf grabs the microphone.]
KC: Hello everyone!
[BOOOOOOOO!]
KC: I, your Perfect, Outstanding Commissioner, have quite the announcement to make to you, my loyal UCW fans! Tonight, I am going to introduce to you a wrestler who may not be as perfect or outstanding as I am, but he's pretty damn close. In fact, he may very well be the hottest wrestler on the circuit today, and I, not only the greatest wrestler of all-time, but the greatest commissioner and general manager of all-time, have scored him for UCW! So everyone give a round of applause... to me, for making the UCW roster that much better!
[The crowd boos Cloverleaf, but the commish soaks it up as if they were cheering him.]
RC: You've gotta be kidding me... what an arrogant, egotistical jerk.
RB: Hey, don't talk about our commissioner like that! He's perfect AND outstanding!
KC: Now that you're done adoring me like you should, it's time to give it up to our new signing! He's the current A1E World Heavyweight Champion, the Anglo Luchador...
[Cue up "Rock You Like a Hurricane."]
DR: Wait a second, that's not JA's theme song!
RB: Hey, maybe he's using a different one for UCW. Folks do it all the time!
KC: ...Jeric....
[Enter someone in a lucha mask... but not Jericoholic Anonymous. The one entering is shorter and more jittery and is wearing tiger-striped orange and black tights. Cloverleaf looks out at the guy coming in and stops his intro dead in his tracks.]
RC: That's... not Jericoholic Anonymous.
RB: WHAT? WHAT? WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?
DR: Oh my God... the look on Cloverleaf's face is priceless right now! His secretary wasn't talking about Jericoholic Anonymous. It was Benoitholic!
RC: This is hilarious! Ken Cloverleaf signed the wrong Anonymous brother!
KC: What the hell?
[Benoitholic comes to the ring cheering, raising his hands, doing cartwheels, generally acting like a hyperactive, sugar-addled child.]
RC: Our commissioner is throwing a three-year old hissy fit!
RB: This isn't fair! Someone... someone call the Better Business Bureau! The FCC! Anything! We've all been baited and switched! Bait and switch I tell you!
DR: Not exactly, Bitterman. The secretary only said "Mr. Anonymous."
[Benoitholic enters the ring.]
KC: What the... what the hell are you doing here? You're not Jericoholic Anonymous! You're not the guy I signed!
[Benoitholic takes a mic from the ring announcer.]
BA: WHOOOO! I'm in UCW now! WHOOOO!!! I signed a contract and I talked to your secretary and she sounded HOT! HOT! HOTHOTHOT! WHOOO! Want to touch the boobies! WOOOO!!
RB: I am embarrassed for this company! This is an outrage!
RC: Shut up, Bitterman! I'm enjoying this!
KC: What... you... no... this can't be happening to me!
BA: WHOOOOO!!!! I'm in UCW! Ooooh say can you... CW!! WHOOOO!!! YEEEEEEAAAAAH I'm gonna make everybody cry! CRY! CRY YOU LITTLE FAIRIES!!!
[Benoitholic goes to slap Cloverleaf in some kind of submission hold, but the commissioner swats him away.]
KC: NO! NO! You little sugar freak! Stay away from me! I have half a mind to fire you, along wtih my braindead secretary right now!
[Benoitholic's eyes get really big and he starts to pout like a child.]
RC: Oh c'mon! Don't fire him because you're a pompous jerk!
BR: Hey, don't talk about our commissioner like that! He has a right to fire this twerp! He never hired him in the first place!
DR: Yeah, but it's not like he's a slouch! Benoitholic has won titles in the CWA and MBE. He's a good wrestler. He's just... hyper.
KC: Seriously... give me one good reason why I shouldn't fire you!
BA: Because... umm... because... I'll work for espresso and Jolt Cola! YEAH! CAFFEINE RULES!! WOOOOO!!! I don't need any money! I just need my cafffffffffeeeeeinnnneee!!!!! WOOOO!!
[Cloverleaf's eyes light up.]
RB: No! Don't do it commish! You're only going to torture us all!
KC: Alright... you can stay on! But I'm warning you... if at any time I feel you're not meeting the perfect and outstanding standards of UCW, I'm gonna fire you!
[Benoitholic is oblivious as he's buzzing around the ring with his arms outstretched like he's an airplane.]
KC: Ugh, it's useless communicating with you.
[Cloverleaf throws the mic behind him and exits the ring.]
RC: I can't believe it! Cloverleaf has egg on his face big time!
RB: This isn't fair! I still say that Jericoholic should be MADE to wrestle here!
DR: You can't do that. Besides, Benoitholic will be a nice fit. I'm telling you.
RC: Yeah, I am looking forward to him being here. But now, we need to take a break. We'll be back after these messages.
-----Commercial Break-----
(Cloverleaf pounds his fist on his desk in anger and looks generally bitter as The First walks into his office.)
CLOVERLEAF: “And what do YOU want?!”
THE FIRST: “I had a suggestion for the pay per view…I wanted to talk to you about”
CLOVERLEAF: “OH GREAT…Another brainiac who thinks he can run this company…Well what’s the plan smarty?!”
(The First closes the office door behind him.)
RC: “What is the First planning for the Pay-Per-View?”
RB: “Whatever it is, it’ll clearly be an awful idea.”
RC: Well folks, what a night it has been already here as we take you closer and closer to Civil War which is the next UCW event!
DR: And it’s going to be a great one, Rich! And what about the statement we heard from the man coming up in this next match about his thoughts for Civil War?
(Video clip of Cruise laying out his challenge to Dan Ryan runs.)
RC: Well, it was certainly something, but we still have yet to hear from Dan Ryan on his reaction!
RB: Don’t even worry about Ryan’s thoughts, Cruise! Dan Ryan will wipe the mat with Cameron Cruise and we all know it. There’s nothing to worry about there. Ryan will beat Cruise in any kind of match he wants, just to prove his dominance!
RC: Well, we have yet to see that, as Cruise is currently 1-0 against Dan Ryan here in UCW!
(Black Label Society’s “Fire It Up” blares throughout the arena and the crowd goes wild as Cameron Cruise makes his way out onto the stage area.)
DR: And Cameron Cruise is extremely pumped here tonight! He knows that he has Dan Ryan thinking somewhere in the back, and he’s not going to take it very easy on Promo here in this one-on-one matchup!
RB: You mean Promo’s not going to take it easy on him! Give Promo a few minutes with this guy, and he’ll be softer than play-doh for Dan Ryan at Civil War. We might want to call this one off before it starts.
("My Damnation" by Drill 187 begins to play as the lights in the arena go dark and the stage area fills with smoke. White lights slowly illuminate from behind the smoke and the silhouette of a man with a Singapore cane raised in the air can be seen. A large pyro explosion goes off as the arena lights come back on and Promo makes his way to the ring. Once in the ring, he climbs to the second turnbuckle and raises the Singapore Cane once again pointing to his opponent who stands in the opposite corner staring him down.)
RC: Well, we certainly saw a vicious side of Promo again last week, as he completely obliterated Kin Hiroshi.
RB: This man is really defining himself as a monster here in UCW. After what he did with BG Bruce the past few months, I don’t know if Kin Hiroshi will stand much chance against a man like Promo.
DR: Well, both men are in the ring now, so let’s get this one-on-one match ready to go!
RC: Both men slowly make their way to the middle of the ring. They reach out and there’s a collar and elbow. Cruise quickly gets the advantage with the side headlock. Promo quickly presses him off. Cruise bounces off the ropes, Promo hits the mat and Cruise leaps over to the other ropes. Cruise bounces back…
DR: Big shoulder block by Cruise as Promo hits the deck! Cruise bounces off the adjacent ropes. Promo with a leap frog. Cruise to the other ropes again…
RC: Uh oh! Promo was looking for a monkey flip and Cruise grabbed him right by the legs and picked him up before dropping him face-first into the mat! Cruise keeps hold of the legs and quickly leaps over Promo for a pinning predicament!
1…
2…
Kickout!
DR: Promo quickly pops up and nails Cruise with a right hand. And another! And now Promo drives a shoulder right into Cruise’s gut as he sends him crashing into the corner! Promo quickly climbs to the second rope and mounts Cruise…
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9…
RC: Look out! Cruise just grabbed hold of Promo and pulled him to the middle of the ring before hitting him with an inverted atomic drop! Promo is covering himself now as Cruise bounces off the ropes…
DR: Bulldog! Promo’s face planted right into the canvas! There’s a cover by Cruise…
1…
2…
Kickout by Promo!
RC: Cruise is going to stay on the attack here as he pulls Promo back up again. He grabs him in a front facelock and now spins through…
DR: Neckbreaker by Cruise!
RC: Cruise is really rolling here! He gives a motion to the crowd and he could be looking to finish this one already! He grabs Promo and pulls him up…
DR: No! Promo just caught Cruise with a low blow and Cruise doubles over and to the mat!
RC: Promo takes a minute to gather himself before he pulls himself all the way to his feet. He now walks over and pulls Cruise back up with him. Promo gives a hard knee to the gut as he backs Cruise into the ropes. There’s an Irish whip to the other side…
DR: Tilt-O-Whirl backbreaker by Promo! Cruise just bounced off his knee like a super ball!
RC: Promo quickly gets back to his feet and hits the opposite ropes.
DR: Oh my! Promo just nailed Cruise with a drop kick right to the back that sent him scooting out of the ring and to the concrete floor!
RB: Cruise is hurt! I told you we shouldn’t have had this match take place! Now Dan Ryan can’t beat the hell out of Cruise at Civil War!
RC: That was certainly a violent shot from Promo. He could have cracked a vertebra or dislocated a shoulder with the placement of that dropkick.
DR: Well, Promo doesn’t really seem to care as he’s making his way to the outside to inflict even more damage on Cruise here. Promo grabs Cruise and pulls him to his feet. He grabs him by the arm…
RC: Promo just short-armed Cruise right into the ring apron! If he didn’t break anything with that dropkick, he might have just done it there!
RB: This man is brutal! He’s ruthless! He’s simply in this business to distribute some pain!
RC: Promo now slides Cruise back into the ring. Cruise’s head is still over the apron area here…
DR: Big elbow that sent major pressure to Cruise’s neck there! Promo knows no mercy!
RC: Well, the referee is telling him to bring it back into the ring and it looks like he’s actually going to adhere to that order. Promo back in and grabs hold of Cruise. He pulls him to his feet before placing him in a front facelock. Up goes Cruise…
DR: And down with a brainbuster DDT! Tremendous force being placed on that spinal column of Cameron Cruise! He might not be able to walk after this match!
RB: And look at this man Promo! That mask shrouds his entire face, but you can almost feel the sheer joy radiating off his body at the destruction he’s causing in that ring!
RC: You can certainly feel it, Rob. He’s now grabbing Cruise in what appears to be an atomic drop…no. He’s placing him on the top rope! He’s going for the Promoplex!
DR: There’s the waistlock! He hoists…NO! Cameron Cruise held onto the top rope! Promo pulls again!
RC: But he’s going nowhere! Cruise refuses to be removed from that top rope! There’s a back elbow! And another! Promo’s teetering! Cruise stands up…
DR: Oh my! Huge jawbreaker from the top rope and Promo goes sailing! Cruise is trying to regain his bearings while Promo is out on the mat!
RC: Cruise pulls himself around the ropes slowly. He’s going to…wait! He’s ascending! He’s perched on that top rope and Promo doesn’t know where he is as he gets to his feet…
DR: Missile dropkick by Cruise! Promo stiffened like a board and went end over end across the ring because of that missile dropkick!
RB: Dan Ryan! Where’s Dan Ryan! We need him out here now!
RC: Dan Ryan’s not going to be in this match! This is solely between Cameron Cruise and Promo! Promo tries to pull himself up in the corner as Cruise makes his way toward him. Promo lunges at Cruise…
DR: But Cruise sidesteps! Promo quickly turns around…
RC: Reality Check! Cameron Cruise just nailed Promo with that Reality Check! Promo is out on the mat and Cruise makes the cover…
1…
2…
3!!!
TB: Ladies and gentlemen, here is your winner… Cameronnnnnnn Cruuuuuuuuuuuuise!
DR: I don’t believe it! Promo inflicted so much pain on Cameron Cruise here tonight and still, The Crippler manages to make his way out of this match with a W! Unbelievable!
RB: Unbelievable is right! I can’t believe that the ref missed that hand full of tights that Cruise had as he made that last pin! Unbelievable!
RC: Rob, you and I both know there were no tights in that pin! Cameron Cruise walks away with a clean victory here tonight, and he’s showing his joy as he smiles on his way up the ramp! Promo is beside himself in the ring as Cruise flashes that smile towards him. Promo is telling Cruise that he wants him again, but…look out!
DR: It’s Kin Hiroshi! We’ve already seen Kin Hiroshi here tonight as he lost to Dan Ryan, but now he’s out here, wanting revenge on Promo for what happened last week!
RC: And he’s getting just that as he lights up Promo with several HARD right hands that find their way to Promo’s face! Hiroshi has Promo backed up in the ropes! There’s an Irish whip…
DR: Hurricanrana by Hiroshi! Promo goes flying across the ring! He tries to get back up quickly, but he’s met with a boot to the midsection by Hiroshi…
RC: N.F.M! Hiroshi just nailed Promo with that Canadian Destroyer and Promo is out!
DR: Listen to these fans! They’re going NUTS for Kin Hiroshi!
RB: Someone get out here and stop this crazy man! He’s going to kill Promo!
RC: Indeed he may, because I don’t think he’s quite done yet! What the hell is he doing under the ring?
(ENORMOUS crowd pop)
DR: Are you kidding me?
RB: Who the hell does he think he is?
RC: He appears to think he’s the head of the table! He’s throwing that six foot piece of wood into the ring! He’s setting it up now! We need someone out here to stop Kin Hiroshi!
DR: He’s out of control here! He’s setting Promo on the top rope! What’s he going to do with him up there?
RC: OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!!! Kin Hirsohi just BROKE Promo by sending him through that table with his own move, the Promoplex! Are you kidding me?
DR: Absolutely devastating maneuver by Hiroshi! I’m not sure if I knew he was capable of such destruction!
RC: Well, believe it Doc, because Promo is completely out of it and we need some help out here for him right now! Folks, we have to take a commercial break! Hopefully we can get some help out here for Promo while we do that! Don’t go anywhere!
-----Commercial Break-----
(Out of commercials we see the door to Cloverleaf’s office…The First opens the door and exits, a yelling Cloverleaf behind him.)
CLOVERLEAF: “And if you want to be on the card, you have to prove to me that you deserve it, you have show me you can do the job!”
THE FIRST: (Under his breath) “So be it…”
RC: “What job could Cloverleaf be telling him to do?”
RB: “Irishred’s manservant clearly…He could mow his lawn and wash his car!”
RC: “I don’t know what to make of this folks…But up next…
RC: Well, I thought that up next was a run-down of our next Pay-Per-View, but it looks as though we’re going to follow Cameron Cruise through the locker room.
(Cruise walks with a towel over his shoulder, a smile on his face. Suddenly, he stops in his tracks as none other than Dan Ryan stands in his path.)
Ryan: Well, well Cameron…
It seems as though you would be rather happy with yourself for you “impressive” win over Promo.
Tell me something, Cammy…
Has Promo even won a match here in UCW?
What’s there to be proud of?
(Cruise stands straight-faced, toe to toe with Ryan.)
Ryan: Whoa, whoa… take it easy Cameron.
I’m not here to try and cut on you because you beat someone that EVERYONE can say they’ve beaten.
I’m simply here to say one thing.
You want your little stipulated ladder match at Civil War? You got it.
(THUNDEROUS crowd pop.)
(Ryan flashes a smile to Cruise and walks past him.)
RC: Dan Ryan and Cameron Cruise at Civil War in a ladder match! I don’t believe it! We’ve got to take a break! Don’t go anywhere!
-----Commercial Break-----
(We open to Ken Cloverleaf in his office. He is muttering to himself. We pull in to get a better listen.)
KC: Who the hell does this Benoitholic Anonymous think he is?
Does he really think he can come on MY show and humiliate me?
I’ll show him…
(Cloverleaf picks up his phone and dials a number.)
KC: Sherry?
Yeah, I need you to deliver a message to Mr. Benoitholic Anonymous…
Tell him that in order to properly welcome him to the UCW, I’m going to give him a match against my other newest signing…
…
The signing?
People around the FW world know him as John Doe…
And he’ll be making his UCW debut at Civil War at the same time as Benoitholic Anonymous!
(Cloverleaf slams the phone as he grins from ear to ear.)
RC: Benoitholic Anonymous and John Doe at Civil War? This card just keeps filling up as we speak!
(FADEIN: IRISHRED standing in a parking lot holding the UCW World Title in one hand and a mic in the other hand.)
RED: “Marx…Get out here you coward…This isn’t the ‘Gentleman’s title’ this is for silly boys, this is for people that want to FIGHT…And I not only want to FIGHT…I want to BEAT THE **** OUT OF YOU…SO GET OUT HERE!”
RC: “The champ is calling out Marx as he said he would, he wants Marx to go out there now and get a taste of what’s in store for him when these two men meet at Civil War for the UCW World Title…”
DR: “Well Marx hasn’t answered the call yet…We will see if the #1 contender wants to go after the champ in these extreme conditions…”
(JONATHAN MARX walks out into the parking lot. He glares at IRISHRED.)
MARX: “You may want this fight, and you may think you’re taking me out of my element in doing so, but rest assured, when I beat you at your own game, you’ll just look even MORE the fool when I take that title off you.”
RED: “You want it, BRING IT!”
(RED lays the belt on the pavement in front of him.)
RC: “Red’s drawn a line in the sand!”
RB: “More like the pavement you idiot.”
RC: “MARX CHARGES HIM! IT’S ON! The two men beating the hell out of each other in the parking lot! Red charges and drives Marx hard into a car! Red now throwing a series of knees into the gut of Marx!”
DR: “This is the champ’s game, he’s all about the street fight and just brawling tooth and nail with an opponent!”
RC: “Marx now has his head DRIVEN into the hood of that car…Marx fires a back elbow into Red’s gut and another…Marx now throwing big right hands staggering Red…And now he WHIPS him into the side of a VAN! Red staggers…MARX FLATTENS HIM WITH A CLOTHESLINE!”
RB: “And he hit the pavement hard! This isn’t a nice soft mat, this is the street!”
RC: “It’s a parking lot really Bitterman…Anyhow…Marx now dropping elbows on Red and now he’s raining down punches from the mount position…Red thrashing around and he finally gets Marx off of him…Both men getting to their feet…Marx now drives Red into the back of a car! Man that made a pretty awful noise!”
DR: “That thing just fell apart worse then the blues-mobile!”
RC: “Marx reaching under that car, and he’s got the muffler…The muffler just fell off that car…He just DROVE that giant piece of metal in the gut of Red! He could have broken his ribs!”
RB: “And Red’s howl of agony is clearly UNMUFFLED!”
RC: “Marx now yelling at Red to get up…Red stumbles to his feet…Marx swings with the muffler…Red dodges…Kick to the gut of Marx…DDT ONTO THE MUFFLER! Oh lord! Marx is busted! This is insane!”
DR: “These two men are clearly holding nothing back and are letting each other know to expect hell come Civil War!”
RC: “Both men down…They slowly drag themselves to their feet…Red wins the fist fight and now drives Marx’s bleeding face into the hood of the car…Red climbs on the hood of the car and brings Marx up with…DDT ON THE HOOD OF THE CAR! NO! MARX COUNTERED IT WITH A NORTHERN LIGHTS SUPLEX! RED JUST BOUNCED OFF THE TOP OF THAT CAR!”
RB: “There may not be anything left of the champion by the time we get to Civil War! This is getting totally out of hand!”
RC: “I think UCW management agrees, as here comes security to break these two men up…Marx now firing rights and lefts into the security force keeping them off him…Red getting up off the top of that car while Marx is fighting with the security…BULLDOG OFF THE TOP OF THE CAR TO THE PAVEMENT BY RED! OH MY!!! Red…I just can’t BELIEVE he did that…”
DR: “The champ is clearly going all out and will do anything he can to prove to Marx he means business!”
RC: “Security now pulling the two men apart again…And again Red and Marx just beat the hell out of the rent-a-cops and now are back at each other’s throats! Both men trading punches...Red now just SLAMMED Marx on the pavement, and drops a knee on his chest! AND ANOTHER! Red now being mobbed by the security staff, and he’s just shaking them off like water off a duck’s back…Red’s now getting into a car…Oh no…OH NO! HE’S TRYING TO GET THAT CAR STARTED! HE’S TRYING TO RUN OVER MARX!”
RB: “If he kills Marx, what will happen to our Pay-Per-View?!”
RC: “I think this company is going to have a lot more problems then just worrying about the pay per view if that happens…WAIT! WHAT THE HELL?! THE FIRST JUST CHARGED OUT HERE AND JUST HIT RED WITH A PIPE!”
RB: “Get that idiot out of here!”
RC: “The First now pulling Red out of that car and he continues to hammer away on him with that lead pipe! Red is being beaten silly! Marx is getting up now…First yelling for security to get after Red as First CRACKS Marx in the ribs with that pipe and ANOTHER shot across the back sends Marx to the ground, now security is all over Marx also! FINALLY we’re getting some order restored here!”
RB: “Screw that, I don’t want this freak NEAR these two great warriors!”
RC: “Wait a second…Now Ken Cloverleaf has made his way out here, what is the commish up to?!”
CLOVERLEAF: “You two maniacs want to fight in a parking lot, then FINE, that’s what you got. Falls count anywhere, No DQ’s, it starts in the parking lot and I don’t care where the hell it ends…”
(Both MARX and IRISHRED glare at CLOVERLEAF while they are being held apart by security.)
CLOVERLEAF: “And as for YOU” (Points at FIRST) “I guess you did something that resembles a passable job out here restoring order, so you will be the man assigned to keep order in that match…YOU WILL BE THE REFEREE FOR THE TITLE MATCH!” (THE FIRST smirks, RED yells “NO!” at the news and fights to get free of security.)
CLOVERLEAF: “That’s it, now get them out of here!”
(MARX and CLOVERLEAF are slowly dragged away by security. MARX appears to be calming down as he fixes his stare at RED…RED continues screaming at FIRST “You screw me I’ll KILL YOU! I’LL KILL YOU!” FIRST just stands in the middle of the scene, a slight smile on his face.)
(FADEOUT with RED’S screaming continuing even as the screen goes black.)
-----Commercial Break-----
RC: Well folks, our main event is next! But as our competitors make their way to the ring, Commissioner Cloverleaf has instructed me to give the complete run-down for the matches that will be taking place at his first Pay-Per-View, Civil War!
In what appears to be a huge grudge match, Promo will take on Kin Hiroshi! But this just in, Mr. Cloverleaf has made this match a tables match!
Benoitholic Anonymous will make his in-ring debut against another debuting superstar, John Doe!
Cameron Cruise and Dan Ryan finally try to decide who the better man is as they face off in UCW’s first-ever ladder match with two contracts above the ring! The winner can either choose to acquire the loser’s services until the next pay-per-view, or get a shot at the UCW Title!
The very first United States Champion will be crowned as the four men who are currently entering the ring will face off in an every man for himself four corners match!
And the main event… The UCW Champion Irishred will take on the number one contender, Jonathan Marx in what is now being called a parking lot brawl! And to make things even more action-packed, The First will be the special guest referee!
DR: Rich, I hate to interrupt you, but our four competitors are in the ring and they are ready to take this night home!
RC: Well, it looks like even though they had a bit of discussion about it, but Damon Blackburn and AJ Cirrus have come to the agreement that Damon will start this match here against Adam Benjamin.
RB: As well he should. He probably just told AJ, ‘look, I’m Mr. A1E, remember that?’
DR: Such a great moniker to have here in UCW.
RB: Isn’t it though? By the way, have you seen Damon’s latest film?
RC: Can’t say that I have Rob, but I do see Damon getting completely flipped across the ring by a great armdrag from Benjamin!
DR: Wait a second! Damon is already exiting the ring and asking for a timeout!
RB: And who can blame him! Benjamin snuck in there with a complete cheap shot!
RC: How was the armdrag cheap? It was clean and the bell had already rung!
RB: Because it was! Damon wasn’t ready for that!
DR: Well, the ref is calling Damon back into the ring and he’s doing just that. Wait a second…
RC: He just tagged in AJ Cirrus! Damon Blackburn has been in this match for approximately fifteen seconds and he’s already had enough!
RB: And he was blindsided! He needs to step out and get his bearings for a moment because this damn referee won’t give him a timeout! Can’t you see that Cruise?
RC: Well, AJ Cirrus is into the match here and he’s giving Benjamin a good stare before he gets too far ahead of himself here. They step toward each other and there’s a collar and elbow. AJ gets the quick advantage as he pulls Benjamin into a side headlock.
DR: Benjamin quickly backs AJ into the ropes and presses him off, breaking the hold. AJ gets a rebound…
RC: Huge back elbow by Adam Benjamin as AJ Cirrus came charging back to him! AJ bounces back up…
DR: Scoop slam by Benjamin! AJ tries to bounce back up again, but Benjamin sends him down one more time with a clothesline. Benjamin grabs AJ by the arm and pulls him to his corner. There’s a tag to Beau Michaels.
RC: Michaels into the match quickly here. He grabs AJ by the head and… oh my.
RB: Why must he gyrate those hips in such a fashion? Especially in AJ’s face!
RC: You’ve certainly got me there. I know I didn’t want to see that. Beau gets on the attack here. He pulls AJ to his feet and whips him into the ropes…
DR: Tilt-O-Whirl backbreaker by Michaels! Cirrus yelps in pain as Michaels’s face fills with an evil smile! Michaels is going to go for a cover here…
1…
2…
Kickout by AJ!
RC: Michaels quickly pulls AJ back up here and gives him a hard Irish whip into his own corner. That’s not a very smart move if you ask me.
DR: It is when Damon Blackburn jumps off the apron and avoids the tag! What the hell is he doing that for?
RB: He’s obviously saving himself and letting AJ take all the punishment here so that he may be completely fresh for the United States title match that is going to take place at Civil War! Absolutely brilliant if you ask me.
RC: Well, I have to agree with you there Rob. That is one of the smarter moves we’ve seen here tonight, and it certainly appears as though that’s what Damon is doing right here.
DR: Well, Beau is taking off and dashing toward the corner that AJ is in here…
RC: Tornado DDT by Beau Michaels! There’s another cover…
1…
2…
DR: No! Damon Blackburn reached in at the last second and pulled Michaels off of the cover! And now Beau is letting Damon hear it! He’s leaning over those ropes and just trying to grab Damon with all he’s got!
RB: Look out!
RC: There’s a school boy roll-up by Cirrus!
1…
2…
Kickout by Beau! Beau quickly to his feet.
DR: And he meets AJ with an ENORMOUS clothesline! And there’s a tag back to Adam Benjamin.
RC: Well, might I say that it’s awful nice to see Damon Blackburn making his way back up to the ring apron.
RB: You know, on second look, Cruise… I think that Damon was simply on the floor to mingle with the fans. They are all obviously looking for nothing more than an autograph from one of the premier men in movies.
RC: You think that’s what it is, huh?
RB: Definitely. Damon is a man of the fans. And being the defacto World Champion means that he has to meet higher demands than everyone else. If that means taking a break from some lowly tag team match, then that’s what he must do.
RC: Well, whatever it was, it certainly didn’t help AJ Cirrus any, as he’s stuck in the middle of the ring here getting nailed with a reverse DDT by Adam Benjamin.
DR: Boy, this Benjamin has really been something since joining UCW. Look at the confidence he has on his face as he shoots a stare over to Damon.
RB: Do you think that means anything? Damon will stare a hole right through him and tell him just who the one true Mr. A1E really is.
RC: Rob, do you think you could stop plugging the competition?
RB: All I’m doing is calling Damon Blackburn by the moniker that he earned by beating the hell out of AJ Cirrus.
DR: You can’t argue with him there, Rich.
RC: That’s true. Benjamin stays on the attack here. He pulls AJ up and backs him into the ropes. There’s an Irish whip…
DR: Cirrus rebounds and ducks a clothesline. Flying forearm by AJ Cirrus! Both men are down as AJ tries to regain some stamina here while Benjamin is out of it!
RC: AJ is up, but Benjamin isn’t far behind! There’s a right hand by AJ! And a right by Benjamin! AJ! Benjamin! AJ! Benjamin- NO! Blocked by AJ! AJ backs Benjamin into the corner.
DR: Stiff dropkick into the corner by AJ! Beau Michaels is barreling into the ring now! AJ meets him with a quick knife edge chop. And another!
RC: Michaels is stumbling…
DR: T-Bone Suplex! AJ Cirrus has just taken out both Adam Benjamin and Beau Michaels by himself while Damon Blackburn watches on the outside of the ring!
RC: Benjamin blindsides AJ with a double axe handle! They’re going at it now. Oh my God!
DR: Both men just completely tumbled with each other through the ropes and to the outside!
RC: What the hell? Damon Blackburn is ascending the ropes!
DR: Lightning Strikes Twice! Blackburn just nailed Michaels with Lightning Strikes Twice! There’s a pin…
1…
2…
RC: Neither of these guys are even the legal men!
3!!!
DR: Well, it doesn’t matter because the ref has just called for the bell! Damon Blackburn didn’t do a damn thing this whole match but steal the win! I can’t believe the ref allowed that!
RB: The ref has no say whether you can wrestle smart or not, Ross.
DR: I’m saying that he wasn’t the legal man. Nor was Beau Michaels!
RB: And I’m saying that Damon not only saved himself for the Pay-Per-View, but he also walked out with the win. Hell of a job by Damon Blackburn, the defacto World Champion!
RC: Look out! AJ Cirrus just came out of nowhere and absolutely obliterated Damon Blackburn with that Bolt of Lightning thrust kick! Damon is in a pile in the middle of the ring! And AJ Cirrus is just standing over him! I wouldn’t look for these two to join the tag ranks together anytime soon!
DR: Oh my! I guess that AJ didn’t put Adam Benjamin away like he thought he had, because Benjamin just came out of nowhere and landed a HARD kick right to the back of AJ’s knee. AJ is down on his knee, clutching it while screaming in pain.
RC: Shining Wizard! Adam Benjamin just completely clocked AJ Cirrus with that Shining Wizard!
DR: Oh my! Beau Michaels has just taken down HIS tag team partner with that wheelbarrow suplex that he likes to call the Friend of Dorothy! We have three men in a heap in the middle of the ring. We have one standing over them all! Is this how things will shape up at Civil War? Tune in to find out! We’re out of time folks! Good night!
CRUISE: Oh... why Good Evening ladies and Gentlemen...
And Beau too.
You know...when people get frustrated, most of 'em usually try and walk it off...or exercise it off... or just plain need to find a place to think.
Now in my case, I've gone and actually performed all three options, and wouldn't 'cha know it as of late....
(Cruise snaps his fingers as if to have an epiphany)
What you see around me...well..
(Cruise smiles)
This is mine.
However this is digressing a bit from what I've set aside time to do, and that's to assert and set the record straight on a few things.
Adam Benjamin.
Don't believe for a second that just because you managed to beat me a couple weeks ago that this actually MEANS something.
After all...I was just put through a table a few days before.
Even SUPERMAN needs some time to recover, but as far as I am concerned...the only thing short of hell and high water that's going to keep me from competing night in and night out is a hospital gurney or a threat of an arrest to go to jail.
Which even then... I wouldn't count on me taking the night off ANYWAY.
Irishred...hey, that's a different story. Everyone here knows he's soft on backin' up his words since becoming World Champion anyway...why don't you ask him yourself??
Hell, I wouldn't mind seeing him step it up ANYWAY, so be my guest.
Speaking of "Stepping it up"...this brings me to Dan...Ryan.
The idea of me receiving a paycheck from you on a regular basis aside, you've yet to even LISTEN to what I say.
Most people HEAR...but they never LISTEN.
Now the fact that everyone knows that you're a scholar and an ASSHOLE...we all know which one of the two categories you fall into; which means I have to say it once more, for your benefit.
YOUR......OWNERSHIP......OF......EMPIRE.....PRO... MEANS.......JACK****......IN......U...C...W.
In other words Dan, as far as I'm concerned...you might pay me on a regular basis in Empire Pro...but here in UCW...
As far as I can give a **** mind you...
You really don't rate any better than **** on a shoe on windy day.
But since I know you're so willing to object with your "Horse****" Championship you so proudly carry around with you...
Which by the way... is disgusting...
I'll give you an offer you can't--no wait--I know you won't refuse.
You and me at Civil War in a rematch from New Year's In Hell.
But this time...with a stipulation.
(The camera pan upwards in the direction Cruise is pointing.)
In this briefcase rests not one...but TWO contracts.
One of the contracts will contain legal papers that will find the man who wins this match temporary control over the other until the following Pay-Per-View.
That means, should I beat you...and if I decide to forfeit the other contract....your ass is mine for as long as it takes for you to make it to the Next Pay-Per-View.
Now what pray tell could be this other contract??
Just a standard contract that will make you the Center of the attention to the World Champion, that's all.
That's right Fatboy; the second contract is for the winner to become the next number one contender to the World Heavyweight Champion after Civil War in which the winner may use as quickly as the Revolution afterwards or at a later date.
No ifs, ands, or buts...One of us...if signed...will become the Number one contender.
But you have to focus on BEATING me in the middle of the ring first, which as of late, Dan...And let's be real about this for a second...
YOU...CAN'T...FINISH...THE...JOB!!
So do me a favor until then, Dan, and pray...that if I beat your carcass at Civil War, that I take the ladder and face the Champion.
'Cause God help you if I don't.
THAT Ego Buster, is a Reality Check that you just....won't like.
(Fadeout.)
(A long, black limo pulls into the arena.)
RC: Well, who the hell is this? I thought all the superstars were already here and ready for their matches this week.
DR: Well apparently, someone didn’t get the memo on the bell time for this week.
(The driver exits the limo and makes his way around the car to the passenger door. He opens it and a snakeskin boot appears from under the limo door.)
RB: How you guys be so moronic? Of course all the superstars with matches are here. But the number one contender doesn’t HAVE a match this week!
(The crowd gives Jonathan Marx a TON of heat as he appears on the screen.)
RC: Well, I certainly apologize for not considering the number one contender as I ran through the superstars in my head.
DR: You would also think that the number one contender-
RC: Look out! The UCW Champion, Irishred just came out of nowhere and blindsided Jonathan Marx!
RB: Look at this! This is certainly nothing like what a gentleman like Jonathan Marx would pull!
RC: Red is beating the hell out of Marx here as he has straddled over him on the concrete with those right hands!
DR: But Marx rolls it over! Hard right hands from the number one contender! Marx gets back up to his feet. He pulls Red along with him.
RC: Oh my! Red just went head first into that limo! He’s not stuck-
DR: Oh no! Jonathan Marx just slammed the champion’s torso in that car door that was still open!
RC: Marx pulls Red back up again. But there’s a right by Red! A right from Marx! They’re really going at one another here!
RB: Here comes the cavalry!
RC: A roving band of referees now making their way down as Red was really making a comeback against the number one contender that just slammed him in that car door! Well, I’m glad these refs got out here when they did to keep the main event at Civil War intact because who could tell what these two would have done to-
DR: Red broke free! He’s charging at Marx! They’re going at it again! Folks, we’ve got to try and stop this and take a quick commercial break! We haven't even had a match yet and the action is going wild! Don’t go anywhere!
------Commercial Break-------
The Ultra-tron suddenly comes to life and a hush falls over everyone.
(CUT TO: A shot of a silhouette of a man punching a heavy bag.)
(FADE IN: The word “HE”)
(CUT TO: A shot of the same silhouette doing a sit-up with a medicine ball.)
(FADE IN: The word “IS”)
(CUT TO: A shot of the silhouette standing afar with his arms crossed.)
(FADE IN: The word “COMING”)
(CUT TO: A shot of the silhouette walking towards the camera, but before hitting light, the shot explodes into the UCW logo.)
(FADE OUT.)
RC: Hello again folks! Welcome to UCW Revolution! You’ve already been introduced to a lot of great action, but I’m Rich Cruise, alongside Rob Bitterman and “The Doctor” Doug Ross to bring you yet another episode of the hottest show on television!
DR: It’s great to be here again, Rich. It seems like forever, but that’s only because we can’t wait to see what happens at each and every show of Revolution!
(“Wings of a Butterfly” by H.I.M hits over the PA and the crowd gives a big pop to Kin Hiroshi as he makes his way out from behind the curtain. He makes his way down the ramp and exchanges a few high fives along the way.)
RB: This guy really makes me sick. And it’s not because I had one of his muffins.
RC: Rob, I don’t see how you can say that. It’s really truly amazing that Hiroshi is even out here after the beating he took from Promo last week. I’m anxious to see how he holds up here tonight against The Ego Buster.
(Cue up: "Zero" by Smashing Pumpkins.)
(Thunderous crowd pop)
(CUT TO: 'Ego Buster' flashes across the screen in rapid contrasting black and white. CUT TO: Dan Ryan gorrilla presses Kevin Powers from inside the ring to the floor below. CUT TO: The word "YOU" flashes on the screen. CUT TO: Dan Ryan throws 'Living Legend' Mark Windham from the second level of Key Arena down to the first level. CUT TO: the word "ARE". CUT TO: Dan Ryan clotheslines 'Cocky' Craig Miles, nearly taking his head off. CUT TO: the word "BUSTED" CUT TO: rapid shots of Dan Ryan pulverizing opponents with the Humility Bomb, a last ride power bomb landing high angle on the neck.)
(Ryan walks down to ringside as pyro erupts along the ramp beside him. He rolls under the bottom rope and climbs a corner turnbuckle and simply glares through the sunglasses into the crowd.)
RB: No one holds up really well when they face this man! And you’re going to see it here tonight.
DR: Indeed, Ryan is one of the greatest this sport has ever seen. Hiroshi will have his hands full in this one.
RC: Well, they’re in the ring and ready to go. Let’s get this one underway!
DR: Lockup in the center of the ring, Hiroshi with a hammerlock, Ryan reverse to one of his own, Kin reverses followed by another Dan Ryan reversal with Hiroshi escaping with a jumping snap mare.
The crowd is quickly on their feet applauding the fast opening.
Both men quickly up to their feet, but The Ego-Buster shoves The Muffin Man down with a shoulder block.
RB: Hiroshi does not want to get into a power match here with Dan Ryan.
Hiroshi off the ropes, over with a cartwheel, and pulling Ryan into a monkey flip.
RC: No that is what Kin needs to do right there. He needs to use speed and agility to beat the much larger Dan Ryan.
Hiroshi with a kick, snap mare, headlock on the mat.
DR: Ryan's got his shoulders down...
1...
Kick out with authority by Dan Ryan as Kin flies into the air and lands on Ryan’s uplifted and bent knees.
RB: Ryan transitions into a head scissors, and clamps down hard. Hiroshi headstands out and kills Dan with a dropkick to the head! I think he killed him. Kin with quick cover again.
1...
No I guess he's not dead as he just threw Hiroshi off again.
Both men up and stalking each other and Hiroshi is working over Ryan with kicks to the back of the leg. Hiroshi tries to lock Ryan into an abdominal stretch but Ryan's far too close to the ropes to make this work, and after the hold is broken, Dan uses the opening to toss Hiroshi out of the ring by his tights.
DR: This is going to get ugly for The Muffin Man. He does not want to be outside facing the absolutely sadistic Dan Ryan. Ryan can not only take punishment the man knows now to dish it out like few others in the sport do.
Ryan out after Hiroshi and uses a Russian leg sweep to drive Kin into the steel barricade.
RC: Son of a ***** that had to hurt. Ryan has Hiroshi pressed over his head and the Muffin Man is tossed easily into the ring over the top rope. What a power display by Ryan.
The Ego Buster follows Hiroshi back in and drops The Hammer down to the back of Hiroshi‘s head. Knee drop, knee drop, knee drop, all to the head. Kin Hiroshi pulled up and forearmed down. Choke on the middle rope.
RC: Ryan is making an example of Kin here. He’s not giving Hiroshi a chance to even get his bearings here.
RB: The man is a ring general Cruise. He’s not some greenhorn just jumping into the game.
Dan Ryan off the ropes, jumping hip-check to the back, off the ropes, jumping hip-check to the back, off the ropes, jumping hip-check to the back.
DR: Three times the pleasure equals three times the fun folks. Dan Ryan is pissed off and he’s taking it out on the Muffin Man.
Dan off the far ropes and a running dropkick to Hiroshi's back!
One...
Two...
NO...Hiroshi manages to get his shoulder up.
RC: Really the man should just stay down. This is only going to get worse before it gets better.
Ryan with a rope assisted standing boot choke. Hiroshi brought up and then chopped down. The crowd appreciates that with a huge WHOO! Ryan grabs Hiroshi by the back of the head and gives him the bad mouth.
RB: I hope they have their hands on the censor button in the truck. Some of that language is not appropriate at all.
RC: Rob it’s no different then what you pay women to say to you.
Ryan slaps around Hiroshi, and Hiroshi fights back with shots to the midsection. Kin stopped by a knee to the head.
DR: Jesus!!! Hiroshi’s head just snapped off the mat there. I don’t know how but he is getting up.
Hiroshi battles to his feet and elbows out. Ryan tries to sneak in a suplex and gets pulled into a small package...
One...
Two...
Three... NO!!!
Dan Ryan pops up with a look of absolute shock on his face. He stalks Hiroshi.
DR: I don’t believe this. Hiroshi is actually motioning for Dan Ryan to come and get some.
RB: You know that he won’t have to ask twice.
Ryan with a chop. WHOOOO!!!
Hiroshi chest slap. WHOOOOO!!
RC: Ryan chop! Hiroshi chest! Hiroshi, Ryan, Hiroshi, Hiroshi, Hiroshi. The crowd is
going nuts here!!!
A Ryan eye rake to put an end to that nonsense. Whip to the far rope, head down too soon, and Hiroshi tries to kick it off, plus a wheel kick to knock him down.
Both men trying to get back up. Hiroshi up and shaking with rage. Ryan tries to punch him, and gets kicked hard in the side. Another kick to the left side, and another.
RC: What a comeback by The Muffin Man.
Dan Ryan with an Irish Whip, reversed, Hiroshi back with the running knee lift.
RB: Hiroshi is major pumped up here! Can he capitalize on the momentum?
RC: Whoa, German Suplex by Hiroshi!
One...
Two...
NO!!!
DR: No one saw THAT coming. Hiroshi arguing with the ref saying he wants a faster count.
Ryan pushed into the corner for chops. Corner whip, reversed, Ryan charges in, but Hiroshi's ready for him.
RB: AMAZING Frankensteiner by Hiroshi. Ryan is down and struggling to get to his feet. Hiroshi has him in his sites...
Hiroshi flexes his right leg and sets up -
RC: Super Kick is ducked! Dan Ryan grabs onto Hiroshi. He has him cinched in. OH MY GOD!!! Humility Bomb!
One...
Two...
Foot on the rope!
Ryan hooks the leg off the rope and tries again -
One...
Two...
NO!!!
Ryan pulls Hiroshi away from the ropes.
One...
Two...
NO!!
RC: I cannot believe this. Ryan has to be getting frustrated.
Ryan pulls Hiroshi up and hits a Front slam.
One...
Two...
NO!!
One...
Two...
NO!!!!!
RB: Dan Ryan pounds the mat in frustration. He is absolutely beside himself.
Ryan picks up Hiroshi and charges across the ring.
DR: SON OF A *****!!! Running Humility Bomb!! I think Kin is dead! Son of a *****!!!
One...
Two...
Three...
RC: Your winner by pin fall ladies and gentlemen is the Ego Buster Dan Ryan.
Ryan straddles Hiroshi and smiles over his fallen foe.
DR: Folks I think this is a message directed at one Cameron Cruise. I fear that THIS is Cruises reality.
RC: We've gotta take another commercial break! Don't go anywhere!
-----Commercial Break-----
[Cue up "The Wind Below."]
RC: Alright folks, welcome back to Revolution! It looks like we're going to get a visit from the commissioner.
[Ken Cloverleaf, with a smile beaming from his face, enters to a hail of boos.]
DR: Indeed we are, and I wonder if he's here to introduce the big signing that's been rumored since the last Revolution! was on the air.
RB: With a smile like that on his face, I'm damn sure he is. I mean, who wouldn't be happy to have scored the A1E World Heavyweight Champion!
[Cloverleaf struts into the ring and poses, oblivious to the boos.]
RC: Although I'm sure Damon Blackburn would lay claim to the title as soon as he walked in. Either way, I'm pumped.
DR: Well, remember, it was only a rumor.
RB: No, you heard the Commish's secretary! It was Mr. Anonymous who agreed verbally to sign a contract!
[Cloverleaf grabs the microphone.]
KC: Hello everyone!
[BOOOOOOOO!]
KC: I, your Perfect, Outstanding Commissioner, have quite the announcement to make to you, my loyal UCW fans! Tonight, I am going to introduce to you a wrestler who may not be as perfect or outstanding as I am, but he's pretty damn close. In fact, he may very well be the hottest wrestler on the circuit today, and I, not only the greatest wrestler of all-time, but the greatest commissioner and general manager of all-time, have scored him for UCW! So everyone give a round of applause... to me, for making the UCW roster that much better!
[The crowd boos Cloverleaf, but the commish soaks it up as if they were cheering him.]
RC: You've gotta be kidding me... what an arrogant, egotistical jerk.
RB: Hey, don't talk about our commissioner like that! He's perfect AND outstanding!
KC: Now that you're done adoring me like you should, it's time to give it up to our new signing! He's the current A1E World Heavyweight Champion, the Anglo Luchador...
[Cue up "Rock You Like a Hurricane."]
DR: Wait a second, that's not JA's theme song!
RB: Hey, maybe he's using a different one for UCW. Folks do it all the time!
KC: ...Jeric....
[Enter someone in a lucha mask... but not Jericoholic Anonymous. The one entering is shorter and more jittery and is wearing tiger-striped orange and black tights. Cloverleaf looks out at the guy coming in and stops his intro dead in his tracks.]
RC: That's... not Jericoholic Anonymous.
RB: WHAT? WHAT? WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?
DR: Oh my God... the look on Cloverleaf's face is priceless right now! His secretary wasn't talking about Jericoholic Anonymous. It was Benoitholic!
RC: This is hilarious! Ken Cloverleaf signed the wrong Anonymous brother!
KC: What the hell?
[Benoitholic comes to the ring cheering, raising his hands, doing cartwheels, generally acting like a hyperactive, sugar-addled child.]
RC: Our commissioner is throwing a three-year old hissy fit!
RB: This isn't fair! Someone... someone call the Better Business Bureau! The FCC! Anything! We've all been baited and switched! Bait and switch I tell you!
DR: Not exactly, Bitterman. The secretary only said "Mr. Anonymous."
[Benoitholic enters the ring.]
KC: What the... what the hell are you doing here? You're not Jericoholic Anonymous! You're not the guy I signed!
[Benoitholic takes a mic from the ring announcer.]
BA: WHOOOO! I'm in UCW now! WHOOOO!!! I signed a contract and I talked to your secretary and she sounded HOT! HOT! HOTHOTHOT! WHOOO! Want to touch the boobies! WOOOO!!
RB: I am embarrassed for this company! This is an outrage!
RC: Shut up, Bitterman! I'm enjoying this!
KC: What... you... no... this can't be happening to me!
BA: WHOOOOO!!!! I'm in UCW! Ooooh say can you... CW!! WHOOOO!!! YEEEEEEAAAAAH I'm gonna make everybody cry! CRY! CRY YOU LITTLE FAIRIES!!!
[Benoitholic goes to slap Cloverleaf in some kind of submission hold, but the commissioner swats him away.]
KC: NO! NO! You little sugar freak! Stay away from me! I have half a mind to fire you, along wtih my braindead secretary right now!
[Benoitholic's eyes get really big and he starts to pout like a child.]
RC: Oh c'mon! Don't fire him because you're a pompous jerk!
BR: Hey, don't talk about our commissioner like that! He has a right to fire this twerp! He never hired him in the first place!
DR: Yeah, but it's not like he's a slouch! Benoitholic has won titles in the CWA and MBE. He's a good wrestler. He's just... hyper.
KC: Seriously... give me one good reason why I shouldn't fire you!
BA: Because... umm... because... I'll work for espresso and Jolt Cola! YEAH! CAFFEINE RULES!! WOOOOO!!! I don't need any money! I just need my cafffffffffeeeeeinnnneee!!!!! WOOOO!!
[Cloverleaf's eyes light up.]
RB: No! Don't do it commish! You're only going to torture us all!
KC: Alright... you can stay on! But I'm warning you... if at any time I feel you're not meeting the perfect and outstanding standards of UCW, I'm gonna fire you!
[Benoitholic is oblivious as he's buzzing around the ring with his arms outstretched like he's an airplane.]
KC: Ugh, it's useless communicating with you.
[Cloverleaf throws the mic behind him and exits the ring.]
RC: I can't believe it! Cloverleaf has egg on his face big time!
RB: This isn't fair! I still say that Jericoholic should be MADE to wrestle here!
DR: You can't do that. Besides, Benoitholic will be a nice fit. I'm telling you.
RC: Yeah, I am looking forward to him being here. But now, we need to take a break. We'll be back after these messages.
-----Commercial Break-----
(Cloverleaf pounds his fist on his desk in anger and looks generally bitter as The First walks into his office.)
CLOVERLEAF: “And what do YOU want?!”
THE FIRST: “I had a suggestion for the pay per view…I wanted to talk to you about”
CLOVERLEAF: “OH GREAT…Another brainiac who thinks he can run this company…Well what’s the plan smarty?!”
(The First closes the office door behind him.)
RC: “What is the First planning for the Pay-Per-View?”
RB: “Whatever it is, it’ll clearly be an awful idea.”
RC: Well folks, what a night it has been already here as we take you closer and closer to Civil War which is the next UCW event!
DR: And it’s going to be a great one, Rich! And what about the statement we heard from the man coming up in this next match about his thoughts for Civil War?
(Video clip of Cruise laying out his challenge to Dan Ryan runs.)
RC: Well, it was certainly something, but we still have yet to hear from Dan Ryan on his reaction!
RB: Don’t even worry about Ryan’s thoughts, Cruise! Dan Ryan will wipe the mat with Cameron Cruise and we all know it. There’s nothing to worry about there. Ryan will beat Cruise in any kind of match he wants, just to prove his dominance!
RC: Well, we have yet to see that, as Cruise is currently 1-0 against Dan Ryan here in UCW!
(Black Label Society’s “Fire It Up” blares throughout the arena and the crowd goes wild as Cameron Cruise makes his way out onto the stage area.)
DR: And Cameron Cruise is extremely pumped here tonight! He knows that he has Dan Ryan thinking somewhere in the back, and he’s not going to take it very easy on Promo here in this one-on-one matchup!
RB: You mean Promo’s not going to take it easy on him! Give Promo a few minutes with this guy, and he’ll be softer than play-doh for Dan Ryan at Civil War. We might want to call this one off before it starts.
("My Damnation" by Drill 187 begins to play as the lights in the arena go dark and the stage area fills with smoke. White lights slowly illuminate from behind the smoke and the silhouette of a man with a Singapore cane raised in the air can be seen. A large pyro explosion goes off as the arena lights come back on and Promo makes his way to the ring. Once in the ring, he climbs to the second turnbuckle and raises the Singapore Cane once again pointing to his opponent who stands in the opposite corner staring him down.)
RC: Well, we certainly saw a vicious side of Promo again last week, as he completely obliterated Kin Hiroshi.
RB: This man is really defining himself as a monster here in UCW. After what he did with BG Bruce the past few months, I don’t know if Kin Hiroshi will stand much chance against a man like Promo.
DR: Well, both men are in the ring now, so let’s get this one-on-one match ready to go!
RC: Both men slowly make their way to the middle of the ring. They reach out and there’s a collar and elbow. Cruise quickly gets the advantage with the side headlock. Promo quickly presses him off. Cruise bounces off the ropes, Promo hits the mat and Cruise leaps over to the other ropes. Cruise bounces back…
DR: Big shoulder block by Cruise as Promo hits the deck! Cruise bounces off the adjacent ropes. Promo with a leap frog. Cruise to the other ropes again…
RC: Uh oh! Promo was looking for a monkey flip and Cruise grabbed him right by the legs and picked him up before dropping him face-first into the mat! Cruise keeps hold of the legs and quickly leaps over Promo for a pinning predicament!
1…
2…
Kickout!
DR: Promo quickly pops up and nails Cruise with a right hand. And another! And now Promo drives a shoulder right into Cruise’s gut as he sends him crashing into the corner! Promo quickly climbs to the second rope and mounts Cruise…
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9…
RC: Look out! Cruise just grabbed hold of Promo and pulled him to the middle of the ring before hitting him with an inverted atomic drop! Promo is covering himself now as Cruise bounces off the ropes…
DR: Bulldog! Promo’s face planted right into the canvas! There’s a cover by Cruise…
1…
2…
Kickout by Promo!
RC: Cruise is going to stay on the attack here as he pulls Promo back up again. He grabs him in a front facelock and now spins through…
DR: Neckbreaker by Cruise!
RC: Cruise is really rolling here! He gives a motion to the crowd and he could be looking to finish this one already! He grabs Promo and pulls him up…
DR: No! Promo just caught Cruise with a low blow and Cruise doubles over and to the mat!
RC: Promo takes a minute to gather himself before he pulls himself all the way to his feet. He now walks over and pulls Cruise back up with him. Promo gives a hard knee to the gut as he backs Cruise into the ropes. There’s an Irish whip to the other side…
DR: Tilt-O-Whirl backbreaker by Promo! Cruise just bounced off his knee like a super ball!
RC: Promo quickly gets back to his feet and hits the opposite ropes.
DR: Oh my! Promo just nailed Cruise with a drop kick right to the back that sent him scooting out of the ring and to the concrete floor!
RB: Cruise is hurt! I told you we shouldn’t have had this match take place! Now Dan Ryan can’t beat the hell out of Cruise at Civil War!
RC: That was certainly a violent shot from Promo. He could have cracked a vertebra or dislocated a shoulder with the placement of that dropkick.
DR: Well, Promo doesn’t really seem to care as he’s making his way to the outside to inflict even more damage on Cruise here. Promo grabs Cruise and pulls him to his feet. He grabs him by the arm…
RC: Promo just short-armed Cruise right into the ring apron! If he didn’t break anything with that dropkick, he might have just done it there!
RB: This man is brutal! He’s ruthless! He’s simply in this business to distribute some pain!
RC: Promo now slides Cruise back into the ring. Cruise’s head is still over the apron area here…
DR: Big elbow that sent major pressure to Cruise’s neck there! Promo knows no mercy!
RC: Well, the referee is telling him to bring it back into the ring and it looks like he’s actually going to adhere to that order. Promo back in and grabs hold of Cruise. He pulls him to his feet before placing him in a front facelock. Up goes Cruise…
DR: And down with a brainbuster DDT! Tremendous force being placed on that spinal column of Cameron Cruise! He might not be able to walk after this match!
RB: And look at this man Promo! That mask shrouds his entire face, but you can almost feel the sheer joy radiating off his body at the destruction he’s causing in that ring!
RC: You can certainly feel it, Rob. He’s now grabbing Cruise in what appears to be an atomic drop…no. He’s placing him on the top rope! He’s going for the Promoplex!
DR: There’s the waistlock! He hoists…NO! Cameron Cruise held onto the top rope! Promo pulls again!
RC: But he’s going nowhere! Cruise refuses to be removed from that top rope! There’s a back elbow! And another! Promo’s teetering! Cruise stands up…
DR: Oh my! Huge jawbreaker from the top rope and Promo goes sailing! Cruise is trying to regain his bearings while Promo is out on the mat!
RC: Cruise pulls himself around the ropes slowly. He’s going to…wait! He’s ascending! He’s perched on that top rope and Promo doesn’t know where he is as he gets to his feet…
DR: Missile dropkick by Cruise! Promo stiffened like a board and went end over end across the ring because of that missile dropkick!
RB: Dan Ryan! Where’s Dan Ryan! We need him out here now!
RC: Dan Ryan’s not going to be in this match! This is solely between Cameron Cruise and Promo! Promo tries to pull himself up in the corner as Cruise makes his way toward him. Promo lunges at Cruise…
DR: But Cruise sidesteps! Promo quickly turns around…
RC: Reality Check! Cameron Cruise just nailed Promo with that Reality Check! Promo is out on the mat and Cruise makes the cover…
1…
2…
3!!!
TB: Ladies and gentlemen, here is your winner… Cameronnnnnnn Cruuuuuuuuuuuuise!
DR: I don’t believe it! Promo inflicted so much pain on Cameron Cruise here tonight and still, The Crippler manages to make his way out of this match with a W! Unbelievable!
RB: Unbelievable is right! I can’t believe that the ref missed that hand full of tights that Cruise had as he made that last pin! Unbelievable!
RC: Rob, you and I both know there were no tights in that pin! Cameron Cruise walks away with a clean victory here tonight, and he’s showing his joy as he smiles on his way up the ramp! Promo is beside himself in the ring as Cruise flashes that smile towards him. Promo is telling Cruise that he wants him again, but…look out!
DR: It’s Kin Hiroshi! We’ve already seen Kin Hiroshi here tonight as he lost to Dan Ryan, but now he’s out here, wanting revenge on Promo for what happened last week!
RC: And he’s getting just that as he lights up Promo with several HARD right hands that find their way to Promo’s face! Hiroshi has Promo backed up in the ropes! There’s an Irish whip…
DR: Hurricanrana by Hiroshi! Promo goes flying across the ring! He tries to get back up quickly, but he’s met with a boot to the midsection by Hiroshi…
RC: N.F.M! Hiroshi just nailed Promo with that Canadian Destroyer and Promo is out!
DR: Listen to these fans! They’re going NUTS for Kin Hiroshi!
RB: Someone get out here and stop this crazy man! He’s going to kill Promo!
RC: Indeed he may, because I don’t think he’s quite done yet! What the hell is he doing under the ring?
(ENORMOUS crowd pop)
DR: Are you kidding me?
RB: Who the hell does he think he is?
RC: He appears to think he’s the head of the table! He’s throwing that six foot piece of wood into the ring! He’s setting it up now! We need someone out here to stop Kin Hiroshi!
DR: He’s out of control here! He’s setting Promo on the top rope! What’s he going to do with him up there?
RC: OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!!! Kin Hirsohi just BROKE Promo by sending him through that table with his own move, the Promoplex! Are you kidding me?
DR: Absolutely devastating maneuver by Hiroshi! I’m not sure if I knew he was capable of such destruction!
RC: Well, believe it Doc, because Promo is completely out of it and we need some help out here for him right now! Folks, we have to take a commercial break! Hopefully we can get some help out here for Promo while we do that! Don’t go anywhere!
-----Commercial Break-----
(Out of commercials we see the door to Cloverleaf’s office…The First opens the door and exits, a yelling Cloverleaf behind him.)
CLOVERLEAF: “And if you want to be on the card, you have to prove to me that you deserve it, you have show me you can do the job!”
THE FIRST: (Under his breath) “So be it…”
RC: “What job could Cloverleaf be telling him to do?”
RB: “Irishred’s manservant clearly…He could mow his lawn and wash his car!”
RC: “I don’t know what to make of this folks…But up next…
RC: Well, I thought that up next was a run-down of our next Pay-Per-View, but it looks as though we’re going to follow Cameron Cruise through the locker room.
(Cruise walks with a towel over his shoulder, a smile on his face. Suddenly, he stops in his tracks as none other than Dan Ryan stands in his path.)
Ryan: Well, well Cameron…
It seems as though you would be rather happy with yourself for you “impressive” win over Promo.
Tell me something, Cammy…
Has Promo even won a match here in UCW?
What’s there to be proud of?
(Cruise stands straight-faced, toe to toe with Ryan.)
Ryan: Whoa, whoa… take it easy Cameron.
I’m not here to try and cut on you because you beat someone that EVERYONE can say they’ve beaten.
I’m simply here to say one thing.
You want your little stipulated ladder match at Civil War? You got it.
(THUNDEROUS crowd pop.)
(Ryan flashes a smile to Cruise and walks past him.)
RC: Dan Ryan and Cameron Cruise at Civil War in a ladder match! I don’t believe it! We’ve got to take a break! Don’t go anywhere!
-----Commercial Break-----
(We open to Ken Cloverleaf in his office. He is muttering to himself. We pull in to get a better listen.)
KC: Who the hell does this Benoitholic Anonymous think he is?
Does he really think he can come on MY show and humiliate me?
I’ll show him…
(Cloverleaf picks up his phone and dials a number.)
KC: Sherry?
Yeah, I need you to deliver a message to Mr. Benoitholic Anonymous…
Tell him that in order to properly welcome him to the UCW, I’m going to give him a match against my other newest signing…
…
The signing?
People around the FW world know him as John Doe…
And he’ll be making his UCW debut at Civil War at the same time as Benoitholic Anonymous!
(Cloverleaf slams the phone as he grins from ear to ear.)
RC: Benoitholic Anonymous and John Doe at Civil War? This card just keeps filling up as we speak!
(FADEIN: IRISHRED standing in a parking lot holding the UCW World Title in one hand and a mic in the other hand.)
RED: “Marx…Get out here you coward…This isn’t the ‘Gentleman’s title’ this is for silly boys, this is for people that want to FIGHT…And I not only want to FIGHT…I want to BEAT THE **** OUT OF YOU…SO GET OUT HERE!”
RC: “The champ is calling out Marx as he said he would, he wants Marx to go out there now and get a taste of what’s in store for him when these two men meet at Civil War for the UCW World Title…”
DR: “Well Marx hasn’t answered the call yet…We will see if the #1 contender wants to go after the champ in these extreme conditions…”
(JONATHAN MARX walks out into the parking lot. He glares at IRISHRED.)
MARX: “You may want this fight, and you may think you’re taking me out of my element in doing so, but rest assured, when I beat you at your own game, you’ll just look even MORE the fool when I take that title off you.”
RED: “You want it, BRING IT!”
(RED lays the belt on the pavement in front of him.)
RC: “Red’s drawn a line in the sand!”
RB: “More like the pavement you idiot.”
RC: “MARX CHARGES HIM! IT’S ON! The two men beating the hell out of each other in the parking lot! Red charges and drives Marx hard into a car! Red now throwing a series of knees into the gut of Marx!”
DR: “This is the champ’s game, he’s all about the street fight and just brawling tooth and nail with an opponent!”
RC: “Marx now has his head DRIVEN into the hood of that car…Marx fires a back elbow into Red’s gut and another…Marx now throwing big right hands staggering Red…And now he WHIPS him into the side of a VAN! Red staggers…MARX FLATTENS HIM WITH A CLOTHESLINE!”
RB: “And he hit the pavement hard! This isn’t a nice soft mat, this is the street!”
RC: “It’s a parking lot really Bitterman…Anyhow…Marx now dropping elbows on Red and now he’s raining down punches from the mount position…Red thrashing around and he finally gets Marx off of him…Both men getting to their feet…Marx now drives Red into the back of a car! Man that made a pretty awful noise!”
DR: “That thing just fell apart worse then the blues-mobile!”
RC: “Marx reaching under that car, and he’s got the muffler…The muffler just fell off that car…He just DROVE that giant piece of metal in the gut of Red! He could have broken his ribs!”
RB: “And Red’s howl of agony is clearly UNMUFFLED!”
RC: “Marx now yelling at Red to get up…Red stumbles to his feet…Marx swings with the muffler…Red dodges…Kick to the gut of Marx…DDT ONTO THE MUFFLER! Oh lord! Marx is busted! This is insane!”
DR: “These two men are clearly holding nothing back and are letting each other know to expect hell come Civil War!”
RC: “Both men down…They slowly drag themselves to their feet…Red wins the fist fight and now drives Marx’s bleeding face into the hood of the car…Red climbs on the hood of the car and brings Marx up with…DDT ON THE HOOD OF THE CAR! NO! MARX COUNTERED IT WITH A NORTHERN LIGHTS SUPLEX! RED JUST BOUNCED OFF THE TOP OF THAT CAR!”
RB: “There may not be anything left of the champion by the time we get to Civil War! This is getting totally out of hand!”
RC: “I think UCW management agrees, as here comes security to break these two men up…Marx now firing rights and lefts into the security force keeping them off him…Red getting up off the top of that car while Marx is fighting with the security…BULLDOG OFF THE TOP OF THE CAR TO THE PAVEMENT BY RED! OH MY!!! Red…I just can’t BELIEVE he did that…”
DR: “The champ is clearly going all out and will do anything he can to prove to Marx he means business!”
RC: “Security now pulling the two men apart again…And again Red and Marx just beat the hell out of the rent-a-cops and now are back at each other’s throats! Both men trading punches...Red now just SLAMMED Marx on the pavement, and drops a knee on his chest! AND ANOTHER! Red now being mobbed by the security staff, and he’s just shaking them off like water off a duck’s back…Red’s now getting into a car…Oh no…OH NO! HE’S TRYING TO GET THAT CAR STARTED! HE’S TRYING TO RUN OVER MARX!”
RB: “If he kills Marx, what will happen to our Pay-Per-View?!”
RC: “I think this company is going to have a lot more problems then just worrying about the pay per view if that happens…WAIT! WHAT THE HELL?! THE FIRST JUST CHARGED OUT HERE AND JUST HIT RED WITH A PIPE!”
RB: “Get that idiot out of here!”
RC: “The First now pulling Red out of that car and he continues to hammer away on him with that lead pipe! Red is being beaten silly! Marx is getting up now…First yelling for security to get after Red as First CRACKS Marx in the ribs with that pipe and ANOTHER shot across the back sends Marx to the ground, now security is all over Marx also! FINALLY we’re getting some order restored here!”
RB: “Screw that, I don’t want this freak NEAR these two great warriors!”
RC: “Wait a second…Now Ken Cloverleaf has made his way out here, what is the commish up to?!”
CLOVERLEAF: “You two maniacs want to fight in a parking lot, then FINE, that’s what you got. Falls count anywhere, No DQ’s, it starts in the parking lot and I don’t care where the hell it ends…”
(Both MARX and IRISHRED glare at CLOVERLEAF while they are being held apart by security.)
CLOVERLEAF: “And as for YOU” (Points at FIRST) “I guess you did something that resembles a passable job out here restoring order, so you will be the man assigned to keep order in that match…YOU WILL BE THE REFEREE FOR THE TITLE MATCH!” (THE FIRST smirks, RED yells “NO!” at the news and fights to get free of security.)
CLOVERLEAF: “That’s it, now get them out of here!”
(MARX and CLOVERLEAF are slowly dragged away by security. MARX appears to be calming down as he fixes his stare at RED…RED continues screaming at FIRST “You screw me I’ll KILL YOU! I’LL KILL YOU!” FIRST just stands in the middle of the scene, a slight smile on his face.)
(FADEOUT with RED’S screaming continuing even as the screen goes black.)
-----Commercial Break-----
RC: Well folks, our main event is next! But as our competitors make their way to the ring, Commissioner Cloverleaf has instructed me to give the complete run-down for the matches that will be taking place at his first Pay-Per-View, Civil War!
In what appears to be a huge grudge match, Promo will take on Kin Hiroshi! But this just in, Mr. Cloverleaf has made this match a tables match!
Benoitholic Anonymous will make his in-ring debut against another debuting superstar, John Doe!
Cameron Cruise and Dan Ryan finally try to decide who the better man is as they face off in UCW’s first-ever ladder match with two contracts above the ring! The winner can either choose to acquire the loser’s services until the next pay-per-view, or get a shot at the UCW Title!
The very first United States Champion will be crowned as the four men who are currently entering the ring will face off in an every man for himself four corners match!
And the main event… The UCW Champion Irishred will take on the number one contender, Jonathan Marx in what is now being called a parking lot brawl! And to make things even more action-packed, The First will be the special guest referee!
DR: Rich, I hate to interrupt you, but our four competitors are in the ring and they are ready to take this night home!
RC: Well, it looks like even though they had a bit of discussion about it, but Damon Blackburn and AJ Cirrus have come to the agreement that Damon will start this match here against Adam Benjamin.
RB: As well he should. He probably just told AJ, ‘look, I’m Mr. A1E, remember that?’
DR: Such a great moniker to have here in UCW.
RB: Isn’t it though? By the way, have you seen Damon’s latest film?
RC: Can’t say that I have Rob, but I do see Damon getting completely flipped across the ring by a great armdrag from Benjamin!
DR: Wait a second! Damon is already exiting the ring and asking for a timeout!
RB: And who can blame him! Benjamin snuck in there with a complete cheap shot!
RC: How was the armdrag cheap? It was clean and the bell had already rung!
RB: Because it was! Damon wasn’t ready for that!
DR: Well, the ref is calling Damon back into the ring and he’s doing just that. Wait a second…
RC: He just tagged in AJ Cirrus! Damon Blackburn has been in this match for approximately fifteen seconds and he’s already had enough!
RB: And he was blindsided! He needs to step out and get his bearings for a moment because this damn referee won’t give him a timeout! Can’t you see that Cruise?
RC: Well, AJ Cirrus is into the match here and he’s giving Benjamin a good stare before he gets too far ahead of himself here. They step toward each other and there’s a collar and elbow. AJ gets the quick advantage as he pulls Benjamin into a side headlock.
DR: Benjamin quickly backs AJ into the ropes and presses him off, breaking the hold. AJ gets a rebound…
RC: Huge back elbow by Adam Benjamin as AJ Cirrus came charging back to him! AJ bounces back up…
DR: Scoop slam by Benjamin! AJ tries to bounce back up again, but Benjamin sends him down one more time with a clothesline. Benjamin grabs AJ by the arm and pulls him to his corner. There’s a tag to Beau Michaels.
RC: Michaels into the match quickly here. He grabs AJ by the head and… oh my.
RB: Why must he gyrate those hips in such a fashion? Especially in AJ’s face!
RC: You’ve certainly got me there. I know I didn’t want to see that. Beau gets on the attack here. He pulls AJ to his feet and whips him into the ropes…
DR: Tilt-O-Whirl backbreaker by Michaels! Cirrus yelps in pain as Michaels’s face fills with an evil smile! Michaels is going to go for a cover here…
1…
2…
Kickout by AJ!
RC: Michaels quickly pulls AJ back up here and gives him a hard Irish whip into his own corner. That’s not a very smart move if you ask me.
DR: It is when Damon Blackburn jumps off the apron and avoids the tag! What the hell is he doing that for?
RB: He’s obviously saving himself and letting AJ take all the punishment here so that he may be completely fresh for the United States title match that is going to take place at Civil War! Absolutely brilliant if you ask me.
RC: Well, I have to agree with you there Rob. That is one of the smarter moves we’ve seen here tonight, and it certainly appears as though that’s what Damon is doing right here.
DR: Well, Beau is taking off and dashing toward the corner that AJ is in here…
RC: Tornado DDT by Beau Michaels! There’s another cover…
1…
2…
DR: No! Damon Blackburn reached in at the last second and pulled Michaels off of the cover! And now Beau is letting Damon hear it! He’s leaning over those ropes and just trying to grab Damon with all he’s got!
RB: Look out!
RC: There’s a school boy roll-up by Cirrus!
1…
2…
Kickout by Beau! Beau quickly to his feet.
DR: And he meets AJ with an ENORMOUS clothesline! And there’s a tag back to Adam Benjamin.
RC: Well, might I say that it’s awful nice to see Damon Blackburn making his way back up to the ring apron.
RB: You know, on second look, Cruise… I think that Damon was simply on the floor to mingle with the fans. They are all obviously looking for nothing more than an autograph from one of the premier men in movies.
RC: You think that’s what it is, huh?
RB: Definitely. Damon is a man of the fans. And being the defacto World Champion means that he has to meet higher demands than everyone else. If that means taking a break from some lowly tag team match, then that’s what he must do.
RC: Well, whatever it was, it certainly didn’t help AJ Cirrus any, as he’s stuck in the middle of the ring here getting nailed with a reverse DDT by Adam Benjamin.
DR: Boy, this Benjamin has really been something since joining UCW. Look at the confidence he has on his face as he shoots a stare over to Damon.
RB: Do you think that means anything? Damon will stare a hole right through him and tell him just who the one true Mr. A1E really is.
RC: Rob, do you think you could stop plugging the competition?
RB: All I’m doing is calling Damon Blackburn by the moniker that he earned by beating the hell out of AJ Cirrus.
DR: You can’t argue with him there, Rich.
RC: That’s true. Benjamin stays on the attack here. He pulls AJ up and backs him into the ropes. There’s an Irish whip…
DR: Cirrus rebounds and ducks a clothesline. Flying forearm by AJ Cirrus! Both men are down as AJ tries to regain some stamina here while Benjamin is out of it!
RC: AJ is up, but Benjamin isn’t far behind! There’s a right hand by AJ! And a right by Benjamin! AJ! Benjamin! AJ! Benjamin- NO! Blocked by AJ! AJ backs Benjamin into the corner.
DR: Stiff dropkick into the corner by AJ! Beau Michaels is barreling into the ring now! AJ meets him with a quick knife edge chop. And another!
RC: Michaels is stumbling…
DR: T-Bone Suplex! AJ Cirrus has just taken out both Adam Benjamin and Beau Michaels by himself while Damon Blackburn watches on the outside of the ring!
RC: Benjamin blindsides AJ with a double axe handle! They’re going at it now. Oh my God!
DR: Both men just completely tumbled with each other through the ropes and to the outside!
RC: What the hell? Damon Blackburn is ascending the ropes!
DR: Lightning Strikes Twice! Blackburn just nailed Michaels with Lightning Strikes Twice! There’s a pin…
1…
2…
RC: Neither of these guys are even the legal men!
3!!!
DR: Well, it doesn’t matter because the ref has just called for the bell! Damon Blackburn didn’t do a damn thing this whole match but steal the win! I can’t believe the ref allowed that!
RB: The ref has no say whether you can wrestle smart or not, Ross.
DR: I’m saying that he wasn’t the legal man. Nor was Beau Michaels!
RB: And I’m saying that Damon not only saved himself for the Pay-Per-View, but he also walked out with the win. Hell of a job by Damon Blackburn, the defacto World Champion!
RC: Look out! AJ Cirrus just came out of nowhere and absolutely obliterated Damon Blackburn with that Bolt of Lightning thrust kick! Damon is in a pile in the middle of the ring! And AJ Cirrus is just standing over him! I wouldn’t look for these two to join the tag ranks together anytime soon!
DR: Oh my! I guess that AJ didn’t put Adam Benjamin away like he thought he had, because Benjamin just came out of nowhere and landed a HARD kick right to the back of AJ’s knee. AJ is down on his knee, clutching it while screaming in pain.
RC: Shining Wizard! Adam Benjamin just completely clocked AJ Cirrus with that Shining Wizard!
DR: Oh my! Beau Michaels has just taken down HIS tag team partner with that wheelbarrow suplex that he likes to call the Friend of Dorothy! We have three men in a heap in the middle of the ring. We have one standing over them all! Is this how things will shape up at Civil War? Tune in to find out! We’re out of time folks! Good night!