GreggG
Moderator
- Joined
- Jan 1, 2000
- Messages
- 810
- Points
- 18
(CUT TO: Troy Windham, in the back of his stretch HumVee, on his cellphone, looking like a backup member of The Strokes.)
TROY: Like I told you already-- the Ritz Crackers better be square ones and notround ones! I hate round crackers on my cheeze spread. You tell that idiot running this league that I don't care how many Go Troy Go bandanas he sells, if me or one of my entourage is not completely satisfied with the spread, I'm not going to go out there and wrestle. (Troy hangs up the cellphone.)
Y'know, I'm a busy man who DOESN'T have a lot of time on his hands. If I'm not busy recording the Fish Fund theme song for the new CSWA: Greatest Hits and Misses album with the guys from the Gin Blossoms, then I'm busy taping scenes for my role on Celebrity Mole. If I'm not at a South Beach party hosted by Nikki Hilton, then I'm at ANOTHER South Beach party making movies with Paris Hilton. It's hard being the jet-setting, world travelling international playboy superhunk that I am.
That's why I don't want to play ANY GAMES here in the GXW. I'm a busy man and I'm here to do two things-- and that's make a lot of money and f a lot of warm, wet, moist, underaged holes.
I'm already the most famous wrestler on this planet, but I do see this as an opportunity, albeit a small one, to enhance my already fabulous q rating, although me pinning Craig Miles and Eddie Mayfield in under four minutes doesn't exactly enhance that.
So, what I will be doing is I will be extending an invitation to *ANYONE* on this pay per view to come down to the ring and be seen, in person, with The King of All Wrestling. It doesn't matter who it is-- someone from the CSWA like Hornet or my brother or Eli Flair, wanting to try to once again be a footnote in my chapter of this sport's history-- or someone from the GXW, like their world champion, the Steel City Icon, who wants to be witnessed with a real superstar. Hell-- it could even be that glorified ring rat groupie Lindsay Troy, someone I've done in every hole but one...
Actually, better yet, do you know what I might do instead? Instead of having these people come to me to pay me homage for my greatness and for selling out the stadium and, once again, drawing record pay per view audiences... I might go and find them instead.
And you know what I'll do if I find them? Especially this promotion's so-called champion? I'm going to spit in his eye, slap him across the face and watch him take it and then say thank you... because he knows deep down inside that I've accomplished more in one hour than he ever will in his worthless, pathetic career.
(Troy picks up the cell phone and hits a button.)
Hey-- it's me, your boss. I would like round Ritz crackers, I changed my mind. (louder) I don't care WHERE you went to college, you take orders from me. You make sure my cheese spread is hooked up or else we're going to have some MAJOR problems back at the office. (Troy hangs up the cellphone. FTB.)
TROY: Like I told you already-- the Ritz Crackers better be square ones and notround ones! I hate round crackers on my cheeze spread. You tell that idiot running this league that I don't care how many Go Troy Go bandanas he sells, if me or one of my entourage is not completely satisfied with the spread, I'm not going to go out there and wrestle. (Troy hangs up the cellphone.)
Y'know, I'm a busy man who DOESN'T have a lot of time on his hands. If I'm not busy recording the Fish Fund theme song for the new CSWA: Greatest Hits and Misses album with the guys from the Gin Blossoms, then I'm busy taping scenes for my role on Celebrity Mole. If I'm not at a South Beach party hosted by Nikki Hilton, then I'm at ANOTHER South Beach party making movies with Paris Hilton. It's hard being the jet-setting, world travelling international playboy superhunk that I am.
That's why I don't want to play ANY GAMES here in the GXW. I'm a busy man and I'm here to do two things-- and that's make a lot of money and f a lot of warm, wet, moist, underaged holes.
I'm already the most famous wrestler on this planet, but I do see this as an opportunity, albeit a small one, to enhance my already fabulous q rating, although me pinning Craig Miles and Eddie Mayfield in under four minutes doesn't exactly enhance that.
So, what I will be doing is I will be extending an invitation to *ANYONE* on this pay per view to come down to the ring and be seen, in person, with The King of All Wrestling. It doesn't matter who it is-- someone from the CSWA like Hornet or my brother or Eli Flair, wanting to try to once again be a footnote in my chapter of this sport's history-- or someone from the GXW, like their world champion, the Steel City Icon, who wants to be witnessed with a real superstar. Hell-- it could even be that glorified ring rat groupie Lindsay Troy, someone I've done in every hole but one...
Actually, better yet, do you know what I might do instead? Instead of having these people come to me to pay me homage for my greatness and for selling out the stadium and, once again, drawing record pay per view audiences... I might go and find them instead.
And you know what I'll do if I find them? Especially this promotion's so-called champion? I'm going to spit in his eye, slap him across the face and watch him take it and then say thank you... because he knows deep down inside that I've accomplished more in one hour than he ever will in his worthless, pathetic career.
(Troy picks up the cell phone and hits a button.)
Hey-- it's me, your boss. I would like round Ritz crackers, I changed my mind. (louder) I don't care WHERE you went to college, you take orders from me. You make sure my cheese spread is hooked up or else we're going to have some MAJOR problems back at the office. (Troy hangs up the cellphone. FTB.)