B
BuffBellows
Guest
(The screen flickers briefly to show a still picture of two HUGE silhouettes highlighted against a black screen, accompanied by the opening notes of 'Aww Naw' by Nappy Roots. The screen then shifts out as the music fades; the image fades to show young Joey Tyler standing outside an unmarked door, holding his mic.)
Joey: Hello, fans. I'm standing outside the room of GXW's newest superstars, The Monsta Boyz, fresh from the CWA.
(The cheering of numerous fans can be heard, doubtlessly longtime fans of The Monsta Boys' sojourn in the CWA.)
Joey: For those who are unfamiliar with the Monstas, the team consists of former CWA Champion Buff Bellows and his partner, Fat Farrell. They've recently signed contracts with GXW and will no doubt be appearing in the ring soon.
(Joey turns and knocks on the door.)
Deep, Boisterous Voice: Come in.
(Joey opens the door, revealing two men sitting at a table. The first is a massive man of Caucasian descent, with sandy hair worn in a crew cut and facial hair in the form of a moustache and goatee. His features are round, but his build is absolutely incredible - he looks a lot like a rhinoceros, hulking in his green cutoff shorts and teal green-patterned Hawaiian shirt. His companion is a bit shorter, but much fatter, with a browned Polynesian complexion and platinum-blond dye in his hair. He has no facial hair excepting flaring sideburns and is dressed the same as the other man, though his shorts are blue and his shirt is turquoise. The man in green is Buff Bellows; the man in blue is Fat Farrell. The fans cheer again.)
Buff Bellows: Hey, how's it goin', Tyler.
Joey: Just fine, Mr. Bellows. Now, you just came in from the CWA. How do you feel now that-
(Buff suddenly pulls the mic towards himself and leans into the camera.)
Bellows: Heyyyyyy, faaans... THE BIG KAHUNA IS BACK!!!!!
(The Monsta Boyz' fans suddenly erupt into a storm of cheering as Buff continues his speech, now in full control of the mic as Tyler lets go of it.)
Bellows: And let me tell ya somethin'. The Monsta Boyz are comin' to you straight from the CWA. Buff Bellows. Fat Farrell. And let me say one more thing to all them critics who said the Monsta Boyz would never make it. All of ya with yer (his tone turns into a whiny mimick) 'Oh, we so big, we think we're better than you, wah wah wah, wah wah wah. (His voice returns to normal.) Well, guess what? You think yer so hot, well, you ain't all that and a bag of potato chips!
(The fans in the stadium cheer even louder as even a few of those who are unfamiliar with Buff Bellows get in on the action. Fat Farrell leans towards the mic.)
Farrell: Yeah, man! All'a you'sa in GXW betta get yaselves ready, 'cause da Monsta Boyz be knockin' at yo' door!
Bellows: You tell 'em, Farrell. And lemme say something else, the Monsta Boys, Buff Bellows, Fat Farrell, we're goin' straight to the top, baby, and there ain't no one who can stop us. So all you people who wanna hate on Buff Bellows, well, you betta stay out mah bidnass, 'cause when I finish with you I'm gonna make ya get down on yer KNEES and tell me ya love me!
(The crowd goes absolutely wild. Tyler has obtained a second mic, which comes into view as Bellows and Farrell lean back from the camera and resume their relaxed sitting positions.)
Joey: You seem quite confident, Mr Bellows.
Bellows: ... Do you love Buff Bellows, Tyler?
Joey: Of course.
Bellows: Have ya gotten down on yer knees yet?
Joey: Uh, not lately.
(Bellows leans back towards the camera.)
Bellows: How many a' you people wanna see Tyler get down on his knees?
(The crowd cheers thunderously in an affirmative.)
Farrell: I can't hear you, man!
Bellows: You heard the man! I can't year ya! How many people wanna see Tyler get down on his knees?!
(The response is even more thunderous than last time. Bellows leans back and looks to Joey.)
Bellows: You heard 'em, Cookie. Get down on yer KNEES and tell me ya love me.
(Joey gets down on his knees as the crowd roars.)
Joey: I love you, Buff Bellows!
Farrell: I can't hear you, man! Speak louda'!
Bellows: What are ya, a mouse? Come on, I can't hear ya!
Joey: I LOVE YOU, BUFF BELLOWS!!!!!
Bellows: That's better. It's nice to be appreciated, eh Farrell?
Farrell: Oh yah, man.
Bellows: You can get off yer knees now, Cookie.
(Joey gets up and brushes himself off.)
Bellows: No hard feelings, ah? You have a good day, Cookie.
Joey: Uh, you too, sir.
(Joey goes off-camera, but the picture remains on Buff and Fat.)
Bellows: I'm hungry. How 'bout some chicken?
Farrell: I could go for some chicken.
Bellows: Yeah. Let's get some chicken.
(The two massive men rise and go off camera as the screen fades to black.)
Joey: Hello, fans. I'm standing outside the room of GXW's newest superstars, The Monsta Boyz, fresh from the CWA.
(The cheering of numerous fans can be heard, doubtlessly longtime fans of The Monsta Boys' sojourn in the CWA.)
Joey: For those who are unfamiliar with the Monstas, the team consists of former CWA Champion Buff Bellows and his partner, Fat Farrell. They've recently signed contracts with GXW and will no doubt be appearing in the ring soon.
(Joey turns and knocks on the door.)
Deep, Boisterous Voice: Come in.
(Joey opens the door, revealing two men sitting at a table. The first is a massive man of Caucasian descent, with sandy hair worn in a crew cut and facial hair in the form of a moustache and goatee. His features are round, but his build is absolutely incredible - he looks a lot like a rhinoceros, hulking in his green cutoff shorts and teal green-patterned Hawaiian shirt. His companion is a bit shorter, but much fatter, with a browned Polynesian complexion and platinum-blond dye in his hair. He has no facial hair excepting flaring sideburns and is dressed the same as the other man, though his shorts are blue and his shirt is turquoise. The man in green is Buff Bellows; the man in blue is Fat Farrell. The fans cheer again.)
Buff Bellows: Hey, how's it goin', Tyler.
Joey: Just fine, Mr. Bellows. Now, you just came in from the CWA. How do you feel now that-
(Buff suddenly pulls the mic towards himself and leans into the camera.)
Bellows: Heyyyyyy, faaans... THE BIG KAHUNA IS BACK!!!!!
(The Monsta Boyz' fans suddenly erupt into a storm of cheering as Buff continues his speech, now in full control of the mic as Tyler lets go of it.)
Bellows: And let me tell ya somethin'. The Monsta Boyz are comin' to you straight from the CWA. Buff Bellows. Fat Farrell. And let me say one more thing to all them critics who said the Monsta Boyz would never make it. All of ya with yer (his tone turns into a whiny mimick) 'Oh, we so big, we think we're better than you, wah wah wah, wah wah wah. (His voice returns to normal.) Well, guess what? You think yer so hot, well, you ain't all that and a bag of potato chips!
(The fans in the stadium cheer even louder as even a few of those who are unfamiliar with Buff Bellows get in on the action. Fat Farrell leans towards the mic.)
Farrell: Yeah, man! All'a you'sa in GXW betta get yaselves ready, 'cause da Monsta Boyz be knockin' at yo' door!
Bellows: You tell 'em, Farrell. And lemme say something else, the Monsta Boys, Buff Bellows, Fat Farrell, we're goin' straight to the top, baby, and there ain't no one who can stop us. So all you people who wanna hate on Buff Bellows, well, you betta stay out mah bidnass, 'cause when I finish with you I'm gonna make ya get down on yer KNEES and tell me ya love me!
(The crowd goes absolutely wild. Tyler has obtained a second mic, which comes into view as Bellows and Farrell lean back from the camera and resume their relaxed sitting positions.)
Joey: You seem quite confident, Mr Bellows.
Bellows: ... Do you love Buff Bellows, Tyler?
Joey: Of course.
Bellows: Have ya gotten down on yer knees yet?
Joey: Uh, not lately.
(Bellows leans back towards the camera.)
Bellows: How many a' you people wanna see Tyler get down on his knees?
(The crowd cheers thunderously in an affirmative.)
Farrell: I can't hear you, man!
Bellows: You heard the man! I can't year ya! How many people wanna see Tyler get down on his knees?!
(The response is even more thunderous than last time. Bellows leans back and looks to Joey.)
Bellows: You heard 'em, Cookie. Get down on yer KNEES and tell me ya love me.
(Joey gets down on his knees as the crowd roars.)
Joey: I love you, Buff Bellows!
Farrell: I can't hear you, man! Speak louda'!
Bellows: What are ya, a mouse? Come on, I can't hear ya!
Joey: I LOVE YOU, BUFF BELLOWS!!!!!
Bellows: That's better. It's nice to be appreciated, eh Farrell?
Farrell: Oh yah, man.
Bellows: You can get off yer knees now, Cookie.
(Joey gets up and brushes himself off.)
Bellows: No hard feelings, ah? You have a good day, Cookie.
Joey: Uh, you too, sir.
(Joey goes off-camera, but the picture remains on Buff and Fat.)
Bellows: I'm hungry. How 'bout some chicken?
Farrell: I could go for some chicken.
Bellows: Yeah. Let's get some chicken.
(The two massive men rise and go off camera as the screen fades to black.)