RE: Remembrence
((FADEIN: Michael Manson in a black velvet suit with a crimson vest and tie. He's sitting in a small cramped room lit only by a light bulb on a small podium with a copy of the Saint James edition of the Holy Bible. The walls are adorned with various pictures of an elderly couple and a young coed. Manson has been edited into all the pictures, sitting at dinner with the elderly couple, at a park bench with the coed, and leading the prayer at Thanksgiving.))
MANSON: Now the old Manson would say that he doesn't care about whatever happened to you, that you're nothing more than a pathetic Dungeons and Dragons roleplayer who wants attention so he dresses in silk and capes and acts depressed. The old Manson would claim that all your claims to actual suicide and torture are simply talk and that you have never actually been involved in anythong of the sort....while Manson...
((Manson stutters, acting as if it was hard to get this out.))
The old Manson that is was involved in numerous activities that injured many, many people physically and in other ways including barbaric torture methods, outright cheating, crucifixion, and blatant mocking of religion.
((Manson pauses and takes a glass of water from under the podium. He drinks it down and then places it back, knocking over his Bible which has a pez dispenser falling out, as it was embedded in the very pages. Manson swiftly kicks it to the back and out of the range of the camera and places the Bible back on top.))
However, the new, improved, KK edited Michael Manson is a changed man. I fully erxpect to go to the ring and have a nice clean scientific match and shake your hand afterword, shake KK's hand, and say a nice prayer about how great life is.
However, you go on these tragic tangents and threaten me, my livelihood, and my family. Now I realize that I don't actually have a family, and the thought of attending weekly services every Sunday alone was just too much. So I borrowed one for the time being.
KK has given so much to me, I had to hesitate, but in the end, being the great, moral, God-fearing man he is, I'm sure he wouldn't mind if I borow his girlfriend and parents as my own for awhile. I need some family to be threatened. I already have them on speed dial.
((Manson takes a cell phone out of his breast pocket and hits the speed dial option and a voice quivedrs, 'Hello?'.))
So come the next wholesome GLCW event, Mike Manson is fighting not only for loyal fans everywhere, for the dignity of the sport, but for his family, on loan, and a for a better world for us all. Poe, do not even think of harming my family. The old Manson by now would have all their phone numbers and pictures, and he'd be following them around making notes and slowly inserting himself into their lives.
But no, I have adopted them as my own, to hurt them is to hurt me. And I can never allow that to happen.