fugginVOSS
The REAL Funk U. T-shirt
[FADE IN: on TEDDY ALEXANDER standing before a New Frontier Revolution Star background. He wears his patent neck brace which he was becoming so infamous for. Scrawled across the front of the brace read “To Whom it May Concern” in rushed, poor handwriting. He snarls at the camera before pointing down it’s barrel.]
TEDDY ALEXANDER:
“Phil. It seems da stars keep crossin’ our paths together. It seems we’re destined to work as one. As a team, so it seems. Me and you. Brothers in dat ring.”
[Snickers.]
TEDDY ALEXANDER:
“I ain’t never had a brother, Phil. I was an only child. I don’t know what it’s like to have a brother but I can only assume what I think it means to have one. We might not be tied together with blood but as long as I am forced to be one with you we may as well be bonded in blood.
“God knows I’ll spread enough of it.
“What do I think it means to have a brother?”
[He rubs the five o’clock shadow on his chin in thought.]
TEDDY ALEXANDER:
“It means respect. It means trust. Loyalty. I imagine those are things you can expect from your brother. Rough translation is you accept each other for their strengths and weaknesses. And you always got their back.
“Can I expect dat from you Phil? Will you have my back?”
[He thumbs himself in the chest.]
TEDDY ALEXANDER:
“I know over these past weeks I haven’t really given you anythin’ to trust me for. I flip my lid at da drop of a hat. I have anger issues.
“Well... I don’t really have an issue with it.
“But da poor bastard on da receivin’ end might.”
[Shrug].
[ Snicker.]
TEDDY ALEXANDER:
“I’m a Goddamn monster. Da Philadelphian Nightmare. I’m not da easiest guy to get along with. Sure. I’ll grant you dat but I have a certain expectation of how shit goes down. But if your shit fucks up my shit then you’re gonna have a bad day.
“So I got to thinkin’, Phil. You need an olive branch. You need to know dat you...” (points down the camera barrel) “...can trust me.”
[Thumbs himself in the chest.]
TEDDY ALEXANDER:
“Dat I got your back. While we have dis Battle Royal to contend with you got somethin’ else to take your mind out of da game. Somethin’ else to distract you.
“Rook Black.”
[Puts his hands on his hips, sucking in a deep breath as he deals with the fact.]
TEDDY ALEXANDER:
“So here’s my olive branch, Phil Atken. When you go down to dat ring to face off with Rook Black I’ll have your back. I promise you dat. I’ll have your back and I’ll PROVE to you dat I am my brother’s keeper. I will show you dat we can function, at some level, as a team.
“But da question is, Phil...”
[TEDDY raises his index finger as if there were one further point to be made.]
TEDDY ALEXANDER:
“HOW will you prove yourself to me?”
[Folds his arms across his chest.]
TEDDY ALEXANDER:
“I’m waitin’.”
[FADE to BLACK!]
TEDDY ALEXANDER:
“Phil. It seems da stars keep crossin’ our paths together. It seems we’re destined to work as one. As a team, so it seems. Me and you. Brothers in dat ring.”
[Snickers.]
TEDDY ALEXANDER:
“I ain’t never had a brother, Phil. I was an only child. I don’t know what it’s like to have a brother but I can only assume what I think it means to have one. We might not be tied together with blood but as long as I am forced to be one with you we may as well be bonded in blood.
“God knows I’ll spread enough of it.
“What do I think it means to have a brother?”
[He rubs the five o’clock shadow on his chin in thought.]
TEDDY ALEXANDER:
“It means respect. It means trust. Loyalty. I imagine those are things you can expect from your brother. Rough translation is you accept each other for their strengths and weaknesses. And you always got their back.
“Can I expect dat from you Phil? Will you have my back?”
[He thumbs himself in the chest.]
TEDDY ALEXANDER:
“I know over these past weeks I haven’t really given you anythin’ to trust me for. I flip my lid at da drop of a hat. I have anger issues.
“Well... I don’t really have an issue with it.
“But da poor bastard on da receivin’ end might.”
[Shrug].
[ Snicker.]
TEDDY ALEXANDER:
“I’m a Goddamn monster. Da Philadelphian Nightmare. I’m not da easiest guy to get along with. Sure. I’ll grant you dat but I have a certain expectation of how shit goes down. But if your shit fucks up my shit then you’re gonna have a bad day.
“So I got to thinkin’, Phil. You need an olive branch. You need to know dat you...” (points down the camera barrel) “...can trust me.”
[Thumbs himself in the chest.]
TEDDY ALEXANDER:
“Dat I got your back. While we have dis Battle Royal to contend with you got somethin’ else to take your mind out of da game. Somethin’ else to distract you.
“Rook Black.”
[Puts his hands on his hips, sucking in a deep breath as he deals with the fact.]
TEDDY ALEXANDER:
“So here’s my olive branch, Phil Atken. When you go down to dat ring to face off with Rook Black I’ll have your back. I promise you dat. I’ll have your back and I’ll PROVE to you dat I am my brother’s keeper. I will show you dat we can function, at some level, as a team.
“But da question is, Phil...”
[TEDDY raises his index finger as if there were one further point to be made.]
TEDDY ALEXANDER:
“HOW will you prove yourself to me?”
[Folds his arms across his chest.]
TEDDY ALEXANDER:
“I’m waitin’.”
[FADE to BLACK!]