A camera is set up inside of a dark alleyway. A light rain is falling. Trash is strewn all around, with six or seven trash cans emptied all over the ground. A cardboard box lies next to a nearby wall, with newspapers covering it, as well as inside of it. A man walks into the scene. He walks down the alleyway, toward the box. As he passes it, the box damn near explodes as someone quickly stands up out of it, screaming at the top of his lungs. The man leaps into the air and quickly sprints down the alleyway as if he had been shot. The camera zooms in, and we see none other than The Sensational One standing beside the box that is now completely destroyed.
Shane: Sorry for the scare, folks.
I was just down there in the box, trying to see what it was like to be a real man. To know just exactly what it was like to make the ultimate fight to get to the world of professional wrestling.
You know what I’m talking about. The poor, devastated soul that is the WZW champion of whatever that is known simply as “The Wolf”.
Shane gives a little chuckle.
Shane: You know what, Wolfie?
I’ve seen Dan Ryan use airtime to relieve himself with more excitement than that mindless drivel you’ve wasted my time putting forth.
Quite honestly, I guess that’s just part of your contract though.
You know, work around in the minor leagues in hope that you actually develop into a talent. Give yourself some sort of falsehood that you’re actually doing something with your life.
Don’t get me wrong, you’re not sleeping in a cardboard box. But if that last little bit of airtime was any indicator of your pay level, you might have moved up to the slums of inner city New York.
Unfortunately for you, Wolfman, someone out there has it in for you. I’m not sure who the hell that man is, but he is the heartless bastard that entered you into this little thing we like to call TEAM Wrestling.
As you made clear already, you have no clue who neither me nor my partner is. Quite frankly, you didn’t have to say that out loud, your simple speak of domination in this little town that I run proved that.
Shane clears his throat as he prepares to explain.
Shane: First of all, my partner…
Not important. Don’t get me wrong. Franklin and I have never had anything against each other. Hell, we’ve actually worked together before. However, your main level of focus needs to be what you’re looking at right now on the television that you had to pay extra for at the little roach motel that TEAM put you in this week.
You see, there are reasons that I am popping the proverbial “cherry” for Empire Pro Wrestling in this tournament extravaganza.
The first reason would be simply that I am a company man. Dan Ryan needs the best of the best to show up for this tournament to rep his company and he knew damn well who he could count on.
Steven Shane is the hottest thing running through EPW right now, and Dan Ryan is just about to jump on that horse and ride. Step one was simply seeing the amount of fight that was in his dog, and I will prove that first off by taking it to The Wolfman and Mr. Mackey. Mmkay?
Secondly, I’m getting this show on the road because no show deserves to start without a bang. And unfortunately for the rest of Team WZW, that show has begun with the firing of this gun.
You say that you know little of Steven Shane, well this week you will find out why you hear buzz about Steven Shane. You WILL find out why Steven Shane is the hottest thing climbing the EPW ladder. You WILL find out why damn near every fed in the FW circuit is begging for Steven Shane’s services.
We don’t have history, Wolfie. But after this week, the only history we will have is the one win that I have against you and the one loss that you have to me.
Shane looks down and kicks the box out from under him. He looks back up into the camera with a rather serious look.
Shane: You see, you seem to think that because of some small background you have that you are able to get the better of your opponents inside that ring.
That may be the case of what they do down there in Smallville, but this the damn Metropolis of wrestling.
This is quite possibly the greatest spectacle that wrestling has ever seen. Interleague play, if you will, of every company that means something. However, this is simply some sort of publicity stunt for a few of you guys to stop cleaning the canvas after the show is over and maybe actually make some money.
Wolfman, I could care less if you’re scrubbing the canvas, sleeping in a box, or barely showering because your wrestler wages narrowly cover your water bill. The fact of the matter is that nothing you do will ever match the brand of Sensational that Steven Shane will bring to that ring.
You want to whine, *****, and moan about the way you got to where you are? Well boo-f*ckin-hoo. You think that you’re the only wrestler to know what it’s like to be hungry? You think that no one else in this industry knows what it’s like to “not be big”?
We’ve all been there before, jack-o. There’s not a damn wrestler around, outside of Dicky Farnswirth, that doesn’t know the work it takes to get into this business. To finally make it somewhere.
Even Steven Shane faced challenges in his quest to become one of the best. Did I ever live in a box? Hell no. I’ve got enough respect for myself to hold down a part-time job.
But that’s neither here nor there.
The fact of the matter is that everyone in this industry has worked their balls off to get where they’re at, regardless of the obstacles in their way.
Some are able to take each of those as they come and beat them out of their way. Some make it so far and find that obstacle that is too great to overcome, and they are forced into wrestler purgatory.
Unfortunately for you, you will soon find that your obstacle is standing right in front of you this week.
What you thought was your one-way ticket out of the minors has sent you reeling back into a nightmare that you could not even fathom.
Your slingshot ride into what you thought was the big leagues has suddenly come crashing down on you like you were a Red Sox pitcher from the five game series with the Yankees.
I am the Yankees to your Red Sox. And just like this past weekend’s series, you will not walk away with a victory. Instead, you will be turned back to not just where you came from, but even further back than when you started.
I hope you like your stay in the minors. Because it’s either going to be that or back to the box for you after Steven Shane is done with you this week. Just remember that when you look up and see those lights all scattered together.
Shane gives a smirk as he walks down the alleyway and off camera as it fades out.