Danny Collins vs Sean Taylor

[MattPickstock]

Post any promos for the above match below...

Promos are due by Saturday Oct 30, 2004 at 12:00 noon EST. All in-card promos or strats should be sent to euwc_office@yahoo.com

 

[Danny Collins]

I'll take a double please!

(The scene opens in a London bar, where EUWC World Heavyweight champion, and Team Collins leader, "The Definitive" Danny Collins is sitting. Danny leans back in his chair and studies the television, which is playing highlights from the recent Main Frame. Danny looks on as his match finishes, and AOD hits him with a chair. Sean Taylor then stands up and says his piece, before leaving. Collins turns to the camera, and with a slight smile emerging at the side of his mouth, he begins to speak.)

Danny Collins: A suprise? Ha, how very exciting. I wonder what it may be?
Ah, I don't know, and frankly, I don't care. But there is one thing I care about, MY EUWC World Championship staying, with me. At Blood Bath, the people of this world, and most importantly, the EUWC people, the fans, will experience an original, never been done before match! The Match that will decide, without a shadow of a doubt, who truly is the greatest. Sean Taylor has said over and over again, that he is the one, and that he is the "greatest" that EUWC has ever seen. Not true.
Sean, you may be the greatest International Champion of all time, there is no doubt in that, but, you have never been and are still not, the greatest. Hell, I am not even the greatest, I may be the best EUWC has to offer at this specific time, but, I am far, from great.
However, I plan on changing that.

(Danny turns and picks up his drink, before taking a sip and placing it back down on the bar. Danny then reaches into a bowl of peanuts and eats a few, before turning back to the camera, and beginning to speak.)

Danny Collins: See at Blood Bath, a "great one," shall we say, will be revealed, an ultimate champion. At Blood Bath Taylor, you and I will step into the ring and fight it out, to crown the one and only, TRUE champion, forget all the guys who have defended it over and over, or forget the guys who have won it four, five, or six times. This is bigger then all of those combined, because no matter how good our past champions were, none of them, NONE at all, held both the World Title and International Title at the same time.
When I captured the EUWC International title, I was ecstatic, when I became a tag team Champion, I was elated, but when I became World Champion, I felt something that I haven't felt for along time, an overwhelming pride for myself.
And, when you are proud of yourself like that its the greatest feeling imaginable, but after the celebrations, and after the parties, and congratulations, I felt that pride slip a little, because I thought, "What now?" I thought it was over, my dream was fulfilled, and the path had come to an end. But I was wrong.
That very night, I had a dream, a dream where I was fighting, non-stop, against various adversaries, AOD, Holocaust, DDS, even STEALTH and Lord Alucard were there, and every time I finished one off, another would attack, and then another, but I would not give up, I kept going, then I awoke, a smile on my face, because I knew then, that my destiny, did not end with winning the World Title, it only began.

(Again Danny reaches for his drink, before taking another sip and then laying it back down on its coaster.)

Danny Collins: The dream signified my destiny in its true form, defence after defence, match after match, but Taylor. You was not there in the dream. So, is it safe to say that is my destiny to win this match at Blood Bath? No. Is it safe to say, it is my destiny to lose it? Also no. So what is this match? Just luck? Or a flaw in the plan of life? I don't believe in luck, I make my own luck. So it must be a flaw, or, as I like to call it, a chance. This is a chance for the both of us Taylor, a chance to be immortalised forever, a chance like no other, a chance to be a double champion, THE double champion. You can win the 52 Wild title one week, and then the U. S Title another, and while you will be congratulated for your efforts and achievements, you will not be Immortalised. But to have the two top titles in your possession, that is immortality in its true form. It may or may not be destiny, but it is something that can be done, and as long as that is true, I have the chance at being that immortal.

Sean, on October thirtieth, you and I will do battle, and I am sure that you will bring it, everything in your arsenal, the use of rules, the speed, technique, moves, counters, I am sure you will bring it all, at a top class quality, and how do I know? Because I will be doing the exact same, minus the rule part, I prefer to bend and break, rather then uphold. But, I will be coming into that match, looking to end your impressive title reign by any means necessary, hell, if I have to risk health, injury, or even death, I will. Nothing will stop me, I will keep going till every last drop of blood, sweet and adrenaline drips to the mat, and I am unable to move. So long as I am conscious, and so long as I breathe, I will not give up in this match, and I am sure you feel the same Taylor.

I may not respect you much Sean, as you have been a thorn in my side since day one, but I know you can get the job done as well as I can. The only question that remains now Mr. Rules, is can you get the job done without your rulebook? Can you beat me without consulting the thing that has gained you so many restarts or victory's? I hope you can, because if you cannot, you may as well kiss that belt you hold so dear, goodbye.

This is my match, my ultimate match that will stick in the mainds of all, myself included, I only hope, that those reasons, are the right ones.

(Danny turns to the barmen, and lifts his hand in the air.)

Danny Collins: Barmen, I'll take a double.....

(Danny turns back to the camera.)

Danny Collins: Tonight and at Blood Bath....

And you know this...... MAN!!!!

(The bar pours Danny's double, into a fresh glass, as Danny turns back to the bar and relaxes, before the scene, slowly fades.)

 

[Sean Taylor]

Sean Taylor European Vacation 6: Germany

(Location: Berlin, Germany. Sean Taylor is standing inside the Sigmund Freud Museum. He walks past a wax figure of the famous psychologist and turns to the camera.)

Sean: Dreams are funny things sometimes. Mr. Freud thought so. He devoted a part of his life to the examination and explanation of dreams and other sleep induced hallucinations. He made some very interesting observations. I'm sure he would have some interesting things to say about your dream as well.

I'm sure Freud would say that when, in your dream, you're battling challenger after challenger with no rest, this represents a sense of fear or nervousness. You were nervous about having to defend your newly won title. You were fearful of not being able to live up to the expectations of those who congratulated and cheered you. That's why you weren't given a rest. The people in your dream - AOD, Holocaust, DDS - they all represent your greatest victories. Think about it. They were all guys whom you've defeated over the past year. They were your climb to the top. You know that you've beaten htem before and you can beat them again. Maybe that's why I'm not there. Maybe not.

As I'm sure Sigmund would agree with me that the absence of me in your dreams represents uncertainity. You're not confident that you can outlast Sean Taylor. Because, you see, even when you dream, your ego - the part of your psyche responsible for self worth - is still working. But your ego doesn't know if Danny Collins can beat Sean Taylor. So I was left out. On the other hand, at the time you had this dream, you had just won the World Title. So maybe I was omitted because you didn't see me as a viable contender. You said it yourself that you don't respect me much. Maybe the belief that Sean Taylor would be in a position to compete for the top prize never crossed your mind. Maybe you never thought of me when you considered who your opponents would be. I hope not. That would mean that you weren't prepared for the repsonsibilities of being World Champion.

Being World Champion means that you have to be prepared for anything and anyone. From the guy you took the title from to the guy who curtain-jerked three hours before. Things can change very easily. I've never held the World Title but I know all about what it takes to hold it. I've had more success in my career than you'll ever dream of. I am two-time, self-record-breaking International Champion. I have defeated the best in the EUWC. I was voted Co-Superstar of the Year with Lord Alucard and when we finally met in the ring, I came out on top. I've been all over the world and I am even the only active wrestler in the EUWC Hall of Fame.

Collins, I claim to be the best because of the simple fact that I am. I've said it before and nobody has proven otherwise. I am the premiere in the EUWC and no one can dispute that. You were right, though, when you said that you're not the greatest. That you are far, far from the greatest. I know that, man. I know because I am the greatest. And if I need to prove it one more time, I will.

You asked if I can get the job done without the rulebook. Yes, I can. Pick up a copy of Summer Sizzler 2003 when I defeated Samuel Roundtree, the man who had stolen my rulebook a month prior. I won that match and many other without quoting from the rulebook. You see, Collins, I use the rules to get the match I want, to get the title shots I want, only if I need to. Don't worry about the rules, Collins. Just know that if you break them, you may win the match, but you'll always wonder it you could've beaten me fair and square. You don't get a second chance at a match like this. You'd be foolish to screw this one up. I know that you can't and won't let that happen.

I will bring my best to Blood Bath and I know you'll do the same. You don't want to give your title any more than I want to give up mine. This wil truly be a battle for the ages. This is a chance for me to add the EUWC World Heavyweight Championship to my already impressive resume. This is a chance for me to achieve what no other in the EUWC has done. A chance to prove once and for all that the rules are words to live by It's a chance to become the Undisputed Greatest Double Champion in the History of the EUWC.

And Collins, when my hand is raised and both belts are hung over my shoulders . . .

. . . chance will have had nothing to do with it.

(Sean walks off as the camera fades to black.)

 

[Danny Collins]

Respect.

(The scene opens in the Collins Mansion, where Danny Collins is sitting on his balcony, watching as birds fly in and out of his garden.)

Danny Collins: Its wonderful, don't you think, they have so much freedom, nothing to worry about, its so relaxing.

(Danny turns to the camera.)

Danny Collins: What isn't relaxing, however, is Sean Taylor's comments.
And right now I want to tell you, and look into my eyes as I say this, what I am about to say, contains no lies. Sean Taylor, you are RIGHT!
Yes, I dreamed of beating competitor after competitor, without you in sight, and yes, it is probably because I have fought all these men before, and I know I can get the job done against them. But you, I have never faced you one on one, and yes, I have never beaten you. But then again, you have never beaten me.

And yes, I am uncertain about beating you. Why? Because I know you can get the job done, no doubt about it, but I think uncertainty comes in the form of you taking the cheap way out. Yes, I have an ego, I have never denied that, and I never will. But I can control my ego, which, if you don't mind me saying, is the exact opposite to you. You cannot control your ego Taylor, every week its the same thing; "I'm the Greatest," "I'm the man," "I will beat you and add the World Title to my already impressive resume." Sean, your ego is growing to be out of control, just like STEALTH's was, but as we all know, I solved that problem for him.
As for the whole rulebook thing, I know you use it to your advantage whenever possible. At Maximum Carnage, you entered the Royal Rumble as number thirty-one, all because you used a rule, well, as smart and cunning as it is, it's not real and it's not proper because most people earn thier way, while you blag it.
So bring the book, I couldn't care less. Its just a bunch of paper after all. Anyway, I don't need to worry, because I plan on winning this match without the help of anything or anyone else, trust me, I will not cheat to beat you, because that would taint my biggest victory, and that, I do not want.

As for not considering you as a possible candidate for a world title shot, you are wrong, I always thought you where owed one, ****, I was amazed when I actually won the title before you! Over your time in EUWC, you have beaten many greats, and you have been in countless memorable matches, but you have never got a World title shot. That was always something I found to be rather unusual, because for the longest time, Sean Taylor has been a top name in EUWC. I won't deny you deserve this shot, hell, I could not think of anyone else who does, and that is why I am concerned. I remember my first shot, I gave my absolute best, until T-Charger ruined it, then I tried even harder the second time, and was but a second away from winning, until STEALTH ruined it. Then third time lucky turned into a damn conspiracy, when, and I'm sure you remember this, you RUINED IT! Yeah, just like when I actually won the title, you ruined it, I would have beaten Holocaust fairly in the middle of the ring, but you didn't want that, I wonder why? Was you afraid that I would be a bigger threat to you then Holocaust could ever be? You talk about my fear of you, well, I think that feeling may be more then mutual. And as for cheating, I don't need to cheat, never have. I know you will be going all out to win this, and that worries me a little, because I personally know that a dream can inspire you to do things you never thought possible.
And if you think my World Title match was won by cheating, well, check again, because I never summoned Paul Doom, nor did I plan on seeing him, sure, we may be good friends, but that was why he did what he did, because he knew something would happen Paul Doom has always and always will be his own man.

I actually had Donny standing by to help out, because I knew that with Sean Taylor as a ref, I had to have a back up plan, fortunately for me, I never needed to use it.
Sean, in a way, I am disappointed, because I expect more from you as a competitor. I expect some fierce words and some genius statements, but all I got was the same old boring Sean Taylor.
I won't stand here and say I can beat you, I think I can, but, until I prove it, I cannot say it. So I won't stand here on an ego trip and call myself a great champion, because that is something that must be earned. Just as you earned the right to call yourself the "Greatest International Champion of all time."
I won't disagree with that statement, because it is true, there has never been an International champion like you. However, you are far from being the greatest of all time. How dare you go so far as to call yourself that? How dare you even think it? Someday I hope that I can say that, but before I can, I must KNOW, that I am the greatest.

(Danny rises from his chair and grabs the World Championship from a table beside him. He holds it near his face, concentrating on the trophy he holds so dear.)

Danny Collins: I know I am not the greatest, I have never said I am. But, at this time, I am the best! The best the EUWC has to offer, because you don't earn the right to be the World Champion overnight, no, you have to show the world that you are good enough, and I did, on many occasions, hence the reason I hold this belt. This is definitely THE biggest match of, not only the year, but all time. The winner of this match WILL be immortalised, and while I admire your confidence, I feel that the threats of fear are only being passed on from yourself. Sure, I have fear, fear that I will lose the title only a short few weeks after gaining it, and I have fear that I will be remembered as a paper champion, like the few before me. But, I do not fear you Taylor, no, I do not fear you at all. However, contrary to what you think, I do respect you, or rather, your past. Because as impressive as your resume is, these days you seemed more focused on praising yourself about your past, rather then focusing on the task in front of you. I don't respect the man you have become, a snivelling, brown nosing cheat, who will stop at nothing to get what he needs to survive, including tossing off the front office.

At Blood Bath, I will step into the ring, being as ready as only I can, hoping and praying that I will leave as the EUWC's first Double Champion, not because I have no confidence, (that is far from being the reason,) but because I don't trust you in the ring, and I know that you will try almost every little way to beat me, and take my title. And that is what I should expect from someone like you Taylor, because you have done it many times before, the brass knucks incident, the slow count, and the tag match, where you left me stranded in the ring, there is history between us Taylor, history that I cannot forget overnight. At Blood Bath, I want to beat you and get retribution for all the times you have made my life hell. So Taylor, if you really want to beat me, then by all means, try, and try hard, because I am no push over, I can assure you of that.

You claim to be the greatest Taylor, so why don't you prove it once and for all at Blood Bath. Prove you are the greatest, just as I will be looking to do. Remember, only one man can hold the title of "The Greatest."
And after our match, the man who stands triumpant will have it.
And you know this..... Man.

(Danny smiles and slings the title over his shoulder before averting his attention to the birds in his garden once more, as the scene slowly fades to black...)

 

[Sean Taylor]

Sean Taylor European Vacation 7: France

(Location: Paris, France. Sean Taylor is standing on the observation deck of the Effiel Tower. It is night and no one but Sean can be seen. Sean, wearing his International Title belt, looks at over city.)

Sean: Danny Collins said that my ego is growing out of control. Danny Collins said that I ruined his third attempt at the title. Danny Collins said that I am a shell of my former self. Danny Collins says a lot of things.

So I talk too much about the past, huh? How I became the greatest International Champion ever. How I've beaten the best. How I have become the premiere in the EUWC. Yeah, you're right. I do. There's a good reason for it. My career in the EUWC has made people jealous. I have more wins than losses. I hold more victories over former World Champions. And yes, I've even beaten my old record of longest reigning International Champion. What started as a whim, has become an unbelievable feat. I know that you don't discount my past and what I have accomplished. But I continue to mention it so that you realize what I am capable of. At Blood Bath, I'm going do things I've done before and I'm going to do new things. But the result will remain the same. My hand will be raised in victory.

But let's move on from my past. Let's move to the future. Let me tell you exactly what I'm fighting for. First, the EUWC Worldheavyweight Title. The most coveted prize of anyone who ever laced a pair of boots. Holding that title means that all the hard work and sacrifice you've had to put yourself through finally pays off. Second, the distinction of being the first man to hold the International and the World Titles at the same time. This would be another giant step in my already storied career. People will look back at Blood Bath, see Sean Taylor with both belts and think "THAT was the best there ever was". Third, I'm fighting for the chance to change the EUWC for the better. Nowadays, there is mediocrity flying all over the place. A part from you and me, Collins, there is no devotion to this business. When I stand above all as World Champion, there will be a new standard in the EUWC to live up to. Men will not have to just challenge for the title, they will have to prove that they are worthy. They will have to prove themselves, not just to me, but to everyone that they deserve a shot.

But most importantly, Collins, I am walking into Blood Bath expecting to participate in the match of the year. You're the best - proven by being World Champion. I'm the second best - proven by holding the International Championship. This match will be watched by all from start to finish. Nowhere can you find the calibre of wrestling this match will showcase. The winner of this match will truly be the "greatest".

Collins, hear me. I am confident that after Blood Bath, I'll have all the gold. I am to the EUWC as water is to thirst. Quench it, Collins. Drink it down and revel in the glory. The theatrics are over. Next time you see me, I'll be in my last stop of my European vacation. England. More specifically. Your house. I'm coming over not for dinner or a spot of tea, but to shake your hand one time before stepping into the ring at Blood Bath.

Do what you have to, Collins, but whatever you do, be ready. The titles are coming home with me.

Bon soir.

(Sean leaves and the camera pans over the city as it fades to black.)

 

[Danny Collins]

Well, isn't London the lucky bunny?

(The scene opens on a London street. As the camera pans around the dark area, a few cars go past, followed by even fewer pedestrians. The camera continues to pan, and eventually finds its target, "The Definitive" Danny Collins! Danny stands on the opposite side of the road, facing the camera with a smile on his face. He then crosses the road, and motions for the camera to follow him as he continues down the street.)

Danny Collins:
Taylor, I tried.

(Danny continues walking.)

Danny Collins:
I tried to tell you that I respect you, I tried to tell you what you always say, "You're Great," but, as always, you took the comments with a pinch of salt. Now I have said over and over how I think this match will be tough, I would even go as far as to say it may be my toughest ever. But, I'm done congratulating you and praising you, I thought maybe a little neutral respect would form, and we could be sure this match would be the most memorable in EUWC history, but no, that just isn't Sean Taylor, Sean Taylor cannot return praise, he just has to give it all to himself. So, F**k it. Taylor, at Blood Bath, I want nothing more then to rip you apart, why, because I hate you. Yes, there is the truth, I may respect your skills, but I cannot stand you at all. I don't want to shake your hand, thinking about all the things you did to me over the months of this year got me to thinking, I never liked you, and I doubt I ever will, just being near you makes me sick. In fact, the mere thought of someone like you staining my illustrious country with your presence makes me sick. But, seeing as you are coming here, I guess there's nothing I can do, but wait for you to arrive.

However, I would like to say this, if your coming, you better be ready. Think about it, if a true Londoner sees you, expect verbal abuse at the least. You are MY enemy Sean, making you the enemy of the whole of England. And please, if your coming to England, come to London, any other place just is not worth it! Make sure you see the sights, make sure you have fun, God knows it will be better the France AND Germany put together, because at Blood Bath, fun won't even be in the dictionary. You and I will go through hell, and I say that on the understanding that you are willing to stop at nothing to win this, because I certainly will stop at nothing to gain the victory in this one. If I have to break bones to beat you, I will, if I have to put my self through endless pain just to hurt you I will! Don't expect to come to the ring and go through this match without a worry Taylor, oh no, I am coming at you full pelt, you think I see this as a match? No, I see this as a life! If I lose this match, I'm as good as dead, no shot at a rematch, the winner of the Blood Bath match will get that. This match is my life in one night, I win, I live. I lose, I die.

(Danny stops at a crossing, and waits for the green man to appear, it does, and Danny continues walking.)

Danny Collins:
Although your confidence knows no bounds Taylor, I KNOW you skills do. In fact, I KNOW, I can do things better then you, my speed is off the chart, you should know that, I don't think that there is another person on the roster who could match me for speed. I hope you have studied me Taylor, I hope you have watched tape after tape after tape, because I have sat for countless hours, watching your matches over and over again. Why? Because I want to know Taylor from top to bottom, your weaknesses, your strengths, your failures and your success. I know it all, the only thing I don't know about, is the rules. I will admit, know one knows the rules as well as you. You have the book, and I'm sure it has come in handy during those long, lonely nights, especially since you get off on it so much. But you know the rules, ALL OF THEM! I really cannot believe you know them all, its quite amazing. But also, I don't care. Seriously, who cares if there are a hundred and whatever ways to keep a title with winning, why would you want to? A defence is not really a defence unless you win. Loop holes, rules, regulations, all crap, rules are meant for one thing, to be broken, why, because if every one obeyed by the rules, life would be pretty boring now wouldn't it? Think about it.

You think that rule book gives you some sort off power, but not over me Sean, not over me. I make my own rules, if I want to splatter your nose all over your face with a closed fist, I will, if I want to take off a corner pad and ram your face into the metal, ha, I will! If you didn't here me the first time, I said: I...... WILL....... STOP........ AT........ NOTHING!!! That means anything goes, this is just a fight to me, if I want to do something, I will, because I control what I do, not the rules, not the board, and not you. Try and stop me holding the tights during a pin, or poking you in the eye while the ref is not looking, go ahead, try, because Taylor, you may be a master of the rules, but I am a master, at breaking them!

(Danny stops suddenly, and then stares intently at the camera.)

Danny Collins:
Listen to me Taylor, and listen to me good, I'm not afraid to die trying to win this match, I won't stop, whether I have to play by the rules or break them is irrelevant, anything goes in my world, the world that you have yet to experience.
And don't ever question, or, even think of questioning whether I am ready, because Danny Collins is always ready! Don't get your hopes up about leaving with both titles, because when I stand above you with BOTH belts in my possesion, something will break that cannot be fixed, your HEART!
And guess what, that doesn't bother me one, little, bit....
And you know this......

MAN!!!

(Danny smiles cockily, before looking into the camera intensely, as we fade to black.)

 

[Sean Taylor]

Sean Taylor European Vacation 8: England

(Location: London, England. Sean Taylor is standing at Speaker's Corner. Around his waist is the EUWC International Title. In his right hand is the EUWC Rulebook and in his left is a megaphone. Around him is a small crowd of locals and tourists.)

Sean: (into the megaphone) Ladies and gentlemen. Here I stand, the Undisputed Greatest International Champion in the History of the EUWC, Sean Taylor. I have visited your World Champion, Danny Collins, at his home but alas he was not home. Was he afraid of me? No. He is a strong man with stronger convictions. If he could've been there, I'm sure he would have been. Unfortunately, timing was not on our side.

Danny Collins said that he wants "to know Taylor from top to bottom". Therefore I am here to allow everyone to know Sean Taylor from top to bottom. I was born and raised in St. Paul, Minnesota. I grew up watching wrestling from a very young age. I trained under the Minnesota legend Brett Force. I joined the EUWC in 2003 and have become the singe greatest wrestler ever seen. My turn ons include moonlight walks by the beach and hardcore American girl-on-girl porn. My turn offs include snooty English wrestlers who suffer fom delusions of superiority.

(The crowd rumbles with murmurs.)

Sean: I heard Collins say that he will stop at nothing to win the title for title match at Blood Bath. That's nice. I heard him say that he will leave me with a broken heart. But what worries me most is that I heard him say that he has no problem pulling tights during a pin. Listen up, Collins. I understand that this match has sparked a very heated feud and some heated things have been said. But I really must say if you wanted to touch my ass so bad, I think you need to really take a good look at yourself.

(The crowd gets very angry.)

Sean: Man, Collins was right. These people will stick up for their heroes. Look, at Blood Bath, Collins' EUWC Worldheavyweight Championship is up for grabs. But more importantly, my International Title and my now reign as champion which have risen to 144 days as of Blood Bath. Who has more to lose?

I have travelled all over this continent. I've seen the golf courses of Scotland, the ancient buildings in Athens, the architechual marvels in Germany, the Guidos in Italy, the romantic French Riveria, and now the surly faces of the drunkards in England. Now it is on to Tokyo, Japan where I will defend the International Championship and take home the biggest prize in the game.

Collins, October 31st will a definitive day in your career. It'll be the day where you pass the torch to the only man in the EUWC who deserves it. It'll be the day that you tell your grandchildren about forty years from now. It'll be the day that will forever mark your career as the greatest match you've ever had. Will you have both belts placed on your shoulders? No. Will I stand victorious as the Undisputed Greatest Double Champion in the History of the EUWC?

Definately.

(Fade to black.)

 

[Sean Taylor]

Sean Taylor's Japanese Press Conference

(Sean Taylor walks up to the podium. He wears blue jeans, a Taylor Heat t-shirt, and the EUWC International Title around his waist. He rests his rulebook on the podium and removes a piece of paper.)

Sean: Ladies and gentlemen and esteemed members of the press. I would like to say thank you for the wonderful experience I've had being here in Japan. Yes, I'd like say that but I must say that your country is even more frustrating than your language. Now don't get me wrong, I have enjoyed myself here thus far but I just find some of the smaller things are getting on my nerves. In conclusion, Japan is weird. Any questions?

(A Japanese reporter stands up and says something in Japanese.)

Interpreter Yoto Hamishichi-San: He say, "What exacurry do you misunderstand about Japan?"

Sean: Well, first off, my hotel room is very small. There's only a couch and a desk.

Yoto: Did you see a large screen?

Sean: Yes.

Yoto: That is room divida. If you pulla thata back, you have anada room with bed.

Sean: Oh, ok. I'll try that. But, Yoyo . . .

Yoto: Yoto.

Sean: Whatever. Why is it that everytime I meet a person over here, they want me to check their heads for bald spots?

Yoto: Oh, Mista Tayla. Dat is Japanese greeting. We bow to show respect.

Sean: Ah, ok. But Tonto . . .

Yoto: Yoto.

Sean: Whatever. Why did such a respectful soceity named one of their most popular hobbies after a sexual term?

Yoto: What do you mean?

Sean: That paper folding thing, Orgasmi.

(The crowd erupts with laughter.)

Sean: What's so funny?

Yoto: Oh, Mista Tayla. They say that you are the funriest American they ever heard. And they just see "Dude, Where My Car At?" last week when it come to DVD. No one in history make connection between Orgasmi and Oragami. Dat very funny. Good joke.

Sean: (eyes darting left and right) Uh yeah, joke. Any other questions?

(Another reporter stands up and says something in Japanese.)

Yoto: He say, "Have you been to the Egg Dome?"

Sean: No. Not yet. Although I have taken the precaution of getting my cholesterol levels checked. Ha ha.

(The room goes silent.)

Sean: Cholesterol!

(Silent)

Yoto: We don't get it.

Sean: Figures. What's with you people? Grrr. Next question.

(Reporter. Japanese. You get the idea.)

Yoto: He say, "Are you confident about winning your match at Blood Bath?"

Sean: Are you kidding me? (points to nameplate on front of podium) Did you guys not read this? Sean . . . Taylor. Of course I'm confident. What's with the stupid questions, Yoyo?

Yoto: Yoto.

Sean: Whatever. Look, it's very simple. At Blood Bath, there's a match for the EUWC World Heavyweight Title and the EUWC International Title. The combatants are Danny Collins and me, Sean Taylor. It will be the best match ever seen. Why? Because I will walk out the undisputed Greatest Double Champion in the History of the EUWC. Collins thinks that he has the ability to defend his title. He does. But not against me. He doens't know what he's gotten himself into. He's never faced anyone like me. That's because there's no one like me. I am the premiere wrestler in the EUWC and the wrestling business today. Danny Collins is going to count the lights in the ceiling of the Egg Dome while the World and International Titles are draped over my victorious shoulders. Ladies and gentlemen that is all. Hail me a limo, will ya, JoJo?

Yoto: Yoto.

Sean: Whatever.

(Sean takes his rulebook and leaves as we fade to black.)