CLASH OF THE DEFIANTS -- FEEDBACK THREAD!

[Murrr]

It's here!

Yes, it's a little late.

Yes, it's a little rough around the edges.

Who cares? Feedback away for special brownie points (also: hugs).

http://www.defiancewrestling.com/results/122
​

 

[Evan H.]

We will be tidying up the card and smoothing transition for posterity's sake in the very near future, so as far as grammar and formatting goes lets call this ARC AND CHARACTER FEEDBACK / SLASH PROOFREADING THREAD. lol

We just felt it was important to get the thing posted to give everyone something to stare at and respond to on the news and prop boards whilst everything gets... well, allowed to breath a little bit.

EDIT
Considering where we're at right now I'd LOVE to see a little team solidarity with some random creativeness on the website... just sayin'.

 

[MikeyUnlikely]

Clash of the Beefdax edition.


PS: I read this before people started fixing the errors.

Rundown:
FUCK THE RUNDOWN LETS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Welcome to the Clash
Really cool intro piece by Dan Ryan. The FIST delivers straight fire in this one. He hypes the tournament while putting himself over. Nicely done. Was surprised there was no mention of the Main Event from him, but maybe he’s doing that on purpose? Great go home line. Either way, short, sweet, and to the point for a man who’s not in action tonight.


BOX/NATAS Comments
Strong, focused comments from Jason Natas, really likes the biggest hurdle first line. I can feel the Mojo in the air at the end. its very good tho, Murrr knows how to write his faces. Box comes in hot and keeps the fire rolling. These two pair up perfect and their promos as well. Im jacked for the match. Love that fookin accent.


Box vs Nasta
The Entertainer! Yes! I hope everyone is like me and plays theme songs when they read them because this is awesome. Box is sending a statement right off the rip. He’s looking to run through this tourney with ease. Natas’ transformation is slow but deliberate. Now more confident and still has a few lbs on him but he’s def changing over time. That opening sequence was so legit. I’m so hype for this and they are just resetting. Didn't see Natas getting Box down first, I popped! The outside action was tight, I like how Natas is playing the crowd. I’m disappointed to find there is countout in these matches lol. They should just be: who doesn't die? The action is fast paced and brutal. I believe in Natas. This match is single handedly changing my excitement for the character. Thought the gutwrench was it. Two Foe Hammer's can't do it either? Awesome match, fantastic wow! What an opener! I think they should have played the fans up more at the end, they had fan reactions on most of the stuff except the finish was a little downplayed, you would think no matter who won the place would blow up after that match. I HAVE a feeling this is going to be match of the night! Right?

BOBBY/MUSHI Comments
I enjoy Mushi, I like the idea of a wrestler like him on the roster. You always need the monster type and now that we lost OMEGA, I think Mushi if active can slide right in and do something meaningful. Bobby is amazing, this is so funny. I love that there is NEVER evolution from Bobby Dean, he’s an instant classic, its terrific.

Mushi vs Bobby Dean
HAHAHAHAHAHA That Bobby Dean entrance tho. Stellar. Like Mushis entrance (except his themes not on spotify) my comments above ring true again about a nice niche role he could play in a big way. Bobby Dean wanting a sumo fight and throwing up the powder made me literally LOL. Hilarious. POWDERED SUGAR! I’m too high for this shit. Sad to see it end up a complete squash but I know this was thrown together last minute. That said it puts Mushi over big time, and probably paints him as the favorite going into round two due to his easy win. Loved the sumo fight, that ties in perfectly with Mushis background and Bobby Dean is big enough to imagine it. Loved the comedy and the seriousness of this. Well written.

Keyes/Horry Comments
Well half this segment is missing, other than that, Henry Keyes strikes me odd. On one hand I love the MAD Scientist deal going on. Love when he just stops and comes out of left field with something else. At the same time he barely comes off serious, I dont know if Ive fully grasped him yet. Is he a pure comedy character? Or does he have aspirations? Loved the comedy, interested to dive deeper. Wheres Sam?

Horry vs Keyes
The entrances are quick and to the point. Like Keyes giving the goggles away. Nice opening part of the match, liked the description of the chain wrestling along with the commentary (oldskoolflava) Ive reached stalemate two and my opinion above still echoes. I’m hoping this becomes more of a brawl however because thats what this tourney is all about. And its over… lol didn't see that coming. Good enough finish, albeit a bit short. Jack Hunter reference!

Alecz/FDJ Comments
Two in a row with half segments, this was a half of a half of a segment.

Aleczander vs FDJ
Hahahah loved how FDJ started this one off before the bell, only a “crazy” face or a heel can pull that off, and it was excellent. You know up to this point in the show, I thought I wrote Angus a little too over the top or stupid. This match made me feel better about it I'm not sure if that's a compliment but I like this incarnation. Nice hard action in the beginning here, this is what i was expecting from this tournament! Love the bromance. Once I got to the meat and potatoes of this match I was locked in, great writing keeping a good pace while making each spot mean something. FDJ moving on!

I Want My Briefcase!
This back and forth was ridiculous and hilarious.Everything from the RIff Raff reference to the Cold Stone Creamery coupon was great.The Khardasian comment had me rolling. Cecilworth hell bent on purchasing a contract so he can get to one Mr. L. Bruises. LOL

A Warning From the Real World Champion
A straight fire promo from Sean Jackson, Tells the world why he’s going to win, and how he’s going to do it. Then he’s leaving it in the hands of the DEFIANCE Faithful. I love pre match hype spots and Sean Jackson is a classic when it comes to them. BUILD THE EVENT, SELL TICKETS, I WANNA SEE DANE DIE! (Thumbs Up)

Down With This Sort Of Thing
Hope you guys enjoyed. Tried not to have it run on too long, but I thought it came out pretty good. Love being able to write something and then Tom and Billy and Steven come in and just make little tweaks that go so far and add so much to the segments. So much fun.

I Blow It Up Via Satellite
I enjoyed the Impulse/ Cally comments here. A terrific duo, their report is terrific. They are pulling for FDJ! Not a surprise considering their budding friendship. This is well written. Loved the Angus hesitance on the blow it up lol.

Semi Finals Match One:
Nice Intro explaining the decision to send Mushi to BRAZEN before bringing him back. I love little tidbits like that. Box has a ton of energy in his entrance. After his brutal first match and Mushis easy win you have to wonder who has the advantage. Keeping both managers on the forefront is good too, but hopefully it leads to fuckery or what's the point? This should be brutal between two very intimidating figures in DEF. While I love the Lesnar Esque performance from Mushi, I think Box wasn't beat down enough before just being tossed around. You would think one throw wouldn't be enough to let him get tossed 4 more times in succession without fighting back. Liked Katze on the ring apron calming down Box, makes sense. This match just gets more and more brutal as it goes. Very well written, and much more enjoyable than Mushis first match. LOVED THIS FINISH!!!!! AWESOME! I am glad to see Box move on, as its what you would expect but Mushi can use this tourney as a way to ROCKET himself up the card if pushed right. Loved everything from that Character tonight for sure. Great stuff here, second best match after the opener.

Comments from Angel Trinidad
Angel doesn't care to give comments or predictions in this segment about the winner of the DOC title. Instead Keeling uses his time as a platform to talk about what he wants! (which is classic heel work, very well done). Love that he sends a message to Dusty Griffith. Get ready, a war is coming

Semi Finals Match Two:
Hey Sam showed up for his interview time! Surprise! Quick words from both guys before headed to ringside. This match was pretty brief although I enjoyed it more than the first Sam Horry match. One one hand I would have rather seen Horry take it because as a fan you like to see an underdog make it to the finals of a tourney win or lose, on the other hand the two favorites in this thing are in the finals and should be a good clash.

Comments from Dusty Griffith
Griffith comments on the DOC so far, and its brutality. He comments on Keelings comments barely, and shows his general facey attitude. Good stuff.

Unannounced Match - Mikey vs Harmony - SOHER
My first full DEF match lemme know what you thought please

VIP VIEW
Hahahahaha Love the continuity with immediately asking about the NEW SOHER. Little things go a long way when you reference the show. Glad to see the friendship angles from UNCUT continue on tv and ppv as well. HILLBILLY ZOMBIE!!!! The trio make their predictions all for Frank and then Troy dodges (in a manner) the topic at hand, saying tune into DEF TV to get the scoop. That's how you keep the fans coming back. Excellent seg.


D.O.C. FINALS!!!!!
Loved the hyping of the match by commentary makes it feel HUGE, (and it is!) LOVED the breakdown of the Onslaught division from Angus! Excellent! This match was stellar, not sure who wrote this but fantastic job, loved the selling of the brutality through description and commentary, very good balance, and some cool spots. Liked the Canadian backbreakers and the crucifix from FDJ. Terrific story telling and FDJ WALKS out a bad, bloody, mufucking champion!

Dan Ryan Comments
Dan Ryan references WWE and picks Eric Dane to win in a short and calculated segment. Good stuff.

The “Real” World Title Match
Angus is fired up about Sean Jackson and his “reputation”. The pre match promo from Dane is lit, and raw. I loved it. PANDA BEAR LINOLEUM! I LOL’d. The beginning of the match is all Eric Dane in a big big way. Even Marshall Owens popping in cannot take Eric off his game, he seems to have an answer for everything thus far. Sean Jackson's slow style was fun to read. Enjoyed the atomic drop into exploder suplex spot! Vanessa gets involved with the briefcase! Benny ends the match only for Dane to demand it restarted. The back and forth sequence after the restart is awesome. Someones Dad is one tough son of a bitch. Won't stay down fur nuffin! ERIC DANE WINS! ANGUS CRACKS ME THE FUCK UP!

NICE SHOW GUYS. Enjoyed it from the top down, definitely some room to improve in some areas but great way to start a new arc.

 

[Murrr]

INTRODUCTION
I agree with Mikey. FUCK YO’ INTRO.

WELCOME TO THE CLASH
Liked it. A little lighter than usual from the promo GOAT, but that’s kinda perfect for this situation. Giving you enough to leave you satisfied but also wanting more at the same time. That’s how you connect with yer readers.

COMMENTS FROM BRONSON BOX & JASON NATAS
I did the Natas dialogue, obvs. Evan did a great job with Box’s: this guy just feels so dialled-in and sociopathic that I’m actually kinda worried about his sanity at this point.

BRONSON BOX VS. JASON NATAS
Wrote this with Creepy Uncle Evan.

COMMENTS FROM BOBBY DEAN & MUSHIGIHARA
Mushi and Dante’s spot was bang on the money. Nice and brief, but seriously forboding. Rob always does a great job building that kinda vibe about the character and it just makes me want to see Mushi and Dante more often, TBH. Bobby’s were a little off-base, I think. The humour just didn’t fully click with me, although the “30 seconds” line was pretty funny.

BOBBY DEAN VS. MUSHIGIHARA
So this match was originally submitted without an entrance for BBD. Come on, Brian! I thought this was a great match. Kayfabe Bobby Dean has no real business in this tournament, which is what makes him such a great last-minute replacement. Total fish out of water. Him trying to engage Mushi as a sumo wrestler was hilarious, and obviously Mushi completely outclassed him in that department, then made short work of him when this started looking more like a standard wrestling match.

COMMENTS FROM HENRY KEYES
Where were the pre-match comments from Sam Horry for this one? Keyes is on the money as usual. I’ve no idea what the hell he’s talking about half the time, but that’s part of the charm. Three-Man Hand Language of Dionysus. Yes. Okay mate. This show has taken a real turn for the zany with these last few segs.

HENRY KEYES VS. SAM HORRY
Going by the definition of “Strong Style” (which is all about technical/shoot fighting), Sam Horry is a perfect wrestler for this division. I see the DOC as kind of a fusion between that and the All Japan “King’s Road” style (elbow a motherfucker in the face and drop him on his head). Sam’s dressed like Sakuraba and I dig it. Entrance themes get centered and italicised, though: that kinda sticks out here.

The opening stages are great. A very well-written technical breakdown of what’s going on inside the ring, and I was gripped to the constant stalemates. The finish is very jarring, though. I *think* the intention was a flash “HOLY SHIT” kinda finish, but it doesn’t come-off as that. To me it came-off as off-puttingly sudden rather than “OMG, OUTTA NOWHERE” sudden.

COMMENTS FROM ALECZANDER
I get that this was probably thrown together super last-minute after the rebooking, but there’s just nothing there. At least it acts as a buffer between the last match and the forthcoming one.

ALECZANDER VS. FDJ
Great match. Perfect pacing, excellent brawling, and very true to both characters. I think this was a nigh-on perfect summarised DEF match. Can’t really say much more than that, TBH. It’s really, really good.

I WANT MY BRIEFCASE
I like it when Colin writes things. I think just about every second line of this segment included some kind of joke or DEF meme, which I am super appreciative of. It’s an odd show for Farthington to debut on, but I’m just happy he’s here. Every line killed me, from Riff Raff to Mr. L. Bruises. Turning weird OOC things into angles is just fantastic. Really curious how a man who’s too stupid to even get into the building is gonna fare in DEFIANCE. Where’s Uncle Barty, though?!

A WARNING FROM THE REAL WORLDS CHAMPION
This was good, and much more in-line with the Sean Jackson I remember from UTA. Mike always does a good job of breaking down exactly what his opponent’s weaknesses are, and then letting you know how he’s going to exploit them on the road to victory. He paints a pretty damning picture of Eric Dane, but he makes it super hard to argue with him, and that’s probably Sean Jackson’s greatest strength. Solid piece of mental warfare here.

DOWN WITH THIS SORT OF THING
THE RODEO DRIVE RETARD. Amazing. Mikey is so damn over already and Kendrix is gonna benefit immensely from that, although JFK’s obviously gonna get his own heat too. I love Mikey’s revulsion towards all things DOC, because it’s the antithesis of what he’s all about. The building’s full of rabid, bloodthirsty bastards and Mikey going after the reason they’re all assembled tonight is easy heat.

LMAO, “the definitive #girlcharacter song.” Fucking hell. Harmony was alright here. I didn’t like the “small words and speak slowly” line, but by the end, she’s really preaching to the choir and telling the Faithful what they wanna hear. Her issuing a challenge to Mikey is a nice turnaround from the dodging that went on during the Donovan feud, so props for that. I’d still like to see some of the rough edges worn off of the character, though: the cussing is particularly irksome.

I BLOW IT UP VIA SATELLITE
YUS. They start this one off like a couple of cheesy bastards and I am 100% fine with that. Babyfaces, ladies and gentlemen. Babyfaces. They are babies with faces. Yes. “FDJ isn’t evil.” Continuity is wonderful. I love the long-distance fistbump, too. I can’t wait for the day when Angus and Cally are finally besties and #BlowItUp is trending all over Twitter. Great segment, adding some real FUN to these structured little segments.

MUSHIGIHARA VS. BRONSON BOX
The first Mushi match did an excellent job of making me excited for this match, and it did not disappoint. Feels like a real star-making night for him, actually. He didn’t hit the finals, but he dominated his first match and started this one like an absolute bus, too. I genuinely think the only thing I didn’t like here was the clawholds, and that’s only because I fuckin’ haaaaaaaaate clawhold moves. Evan captured the drama of this match very well, particularly when it came to selling the damage Boxer had taken throughout the show and his fighting comeback. Great stuff, both wrestlers come out stronger than before.

COMMENTS FROM ANGEL TRINIDAD
Lava. Just fire. Great segment, Seth. Love how Keeling quickly dispenses with the DOC chat and rips right into Dusty G , again with Angel playing the strong silent type. Keeling has a completely different voice, obviously, but this was right up there with some of my favourite Dan Ryan promos as far as shooting from the hip goes.

SAM HORRY VS. FDJ
Cool little call-back to their previous match. Okay, so I guess here’s where Sam’s pre-match stuff is. Good promo from him, and Frank’s was appropriately short. I thought this was very good: liked it more than the previous Horry match this evening. Again, it’s just very precise. The techniques are explained with good detail, but not to the point where it becomes tricky to ready. Loved the spot with the rashguard/taped ribs, and that goes someway to helping sell the defeat. This time the quick-ish finish didn’t feel so bad: it’s the second match for both men, and we’ve already established that Sam’s banged-up. Good stuff here.

COMMENTS FROM DUSTY G
Good segment. Everyone is realllllly picking Frank for victory, huh? Like the locker-room’s synergised support for the big goofy bastard. I particularly liked Dust’s short, sweet retort to Keeling. It’s a shame things worked out the way they did, because this would’ve been a great feud.

SOHER MATCH
Props for being one of about two guys who actually adhered to the standard entrance format on this show . Fun match. Goddamn “time out” signals and all. I like the contrast between Mikey’s diversionary tactics and Harmony’s “screw this, let’s wrestle” approach. Mikey’s presence in DEF -- the WRESTLER’S fed -- is great. So many different dynamics when he’s in the ring. MAKE DEFIANCE SAFE AGAIN! Fuckin’ Trump Jr. over here. Great finish with sooooooo much fuckery, and Harmony really loses nothing in defeat here (other than the belt, obvs). She had the thing won when Mikey tapped, but it’s hard to compete with such a level of bullshittery and chicanery. Really amps-up the Harm babyface sympathy, and the “GET THE EFF OUT” heat for Mikey. VERY NICE, I LIKE.

THE VIEW FROM VIP
Wrote this with The Face of the Heels herself.

FDJ VS. BRONSON BOX
I wrote a small smidgen for Evan here, but he frameworked the whole thing and obviously did like 90% of the work. Box’s “shit’s about to get real” entrance was a nice little twist for the final and the kinda thing I like to see every now and then. On the night, I think Evan really captured the DOC feel more than anyone else. Gruelling, hard-hitting, brutal wars of attrition. This was probably my match of the night. It’s not overlong, it doesn’t outstay its welcome, and the finish is just fuckin’ savage. An appropriate end to the night’s DOC proceedings.

COMMENTS FROM ASIAN DANIEL RYAN
I’m not down with the WWE line, but I like Ryan burying the Real World Title. Makes sense: he’s holding the top belt in DEFIANCE, yet here’s some Utah guy running around calling himself the real champ. Get in the bin. Short and sweet.

SEAN JACKSON VS. ERIC DANE
I wrote this with Justin.

 

[User Poets]

So I was about 2/3 of the way through the show and my feedback doc was eaten. Gonna do this a bit differently.

Rundown/Welcome to the Show

Dug the easter eggs - GITB, Baws is better than Dad, Cane Dewey. Makes sense that the Fist would have an opinion; but after everything that went down last arc I'm not sure that the Faithful would be so quick to cheer him, even with the cheap pops. Little bit of mood whiplash.

First round of DOC

Promos - Makes sense to put the promos from the competitors before each match, however I think it would've made more sense to be a uniform style - either have comments from just one guy, or comments from both. I know it doesn't always work that way because someone might not have submitted anything, but uniformity for this type of thing is typically the best.

Matches - Two long and two short. It happens, but it almost seems to telegraph the semi - finals as going to be one guy who had a short match overpower his opponent who had a long match, and one guy who had a long match overcoming the odds to beat his relatively fresh opponent. All four matches were very well written and true to form for the eight combatants - props to the hilarity of Bobby Dean and Angus having to call a match where he wasn't a fan of anyone, plus HOSSFIGHT.

I Want My Briefcase

COLIN WRITES THINGS. Cecilworth will probably have a rough transition, which is why he should personally fund the hiring of Uncle Barty to referee all of his matches.

Real Worlds' Champion

DAD DOES THINGS. The teasing and taunting and almost - havings of Sean Jackson have really hyped his first match in DEF; my only hesitation is wondering if he was overhyped, and his first match won't be able to live up to it? Still, if "writing things too good" is your worst problem...

Down With This Sort of Thing

Segment of the night. Mikey getting the entire arena to hate him, along with dueling "We hate you" "We also hate you" chants is glorious. Behind Ryan, the number 2 heel in the company right now in my opinion. Also a good setup for the SoHER match to be impromptu-ly defended, though it could conceivably be a 5 - 1 mugging. What were you thinking, justagirl?

I Blow It Up via Satallite

I wrote this. Glad people enjoy the fistbumps, I always wonder if the gag is starting to run thin.

DOC Semi Finals

Surprise, surprise - both guys who wrestled longer matches won. Best part of this was the continuity - the fact that everyone was selling their night so far. Some guys weren't winded, some were showing signs of fatigue. Feel bad for Mushi, though - he didn't even get to lose. Still, it gives him a good in to be (one of) the first to challenge the Champ. FDJ got a record win as well - makes sense that a Hoss would know he's got another match to wrestle, so he's gonna try to end it quick.

Comments from Angel Trinidad

No surprise, he and Damien skip the DOC and focus on Dusty. Makes sense.

Comments from Dusty Griffith

Nice transition to FDJ showing up to get the party started.

SoHER

Holy shit, I never get tired of the name Hollywood McFuckass. The Mikey Money, the red carpet - it's all about presence. This was my clear match of the night - it told a flawless story about a superior Champion and a devious Challenger. Loved the way Mikey kept breaking up the hope spots and yelling at the ref that "He can't do it again." And of course, a tap out when the referee's back is turned. Classic chickenshit heel, and it - along with the interference and reversal - is played beautifully. Match of the night.

The View from the Top

I love the reaction to the SoHER match from Andy, along with Cayle thinking he went a little too far. Good little bit about their finals picks.

BOX vs. FDJ for the DOC - Three Letters Better

Echoing above - the DOC was always meant to be a HOSS championship with hard hitting ridiculousness, and this match had it in spades. Congrats to FDJ and Box both - I think the belt was made with this first title match.

The "SURE" Movement

The "Bleed your own blood" line is immediately canceled out by the WWE Shopzone line. You're better than that, Asian Daniel Ryan.

Baws vs. Dad

Not a fan of the "Let's match based on a feud from another place," but the build to this one contained enough to capture interest and make it a DEF thing. Intros already made it a classic - Dane may have lost in front of the Mormons but he's reminding Jackson that this is his house. Rile him up before the match even starts.

Not 100% sold on the overbookings - I get the reason for it but if Dane is the boss and can just restart the match, there goes the tension. I think it should've been Kelly Evans to do that - keeps an obvious "Deus Ex Machina" from solving all of the things.

Also - and this is just me fantasy booking so take it for what it is - wouldn't it have maybe been better for all concerned if Dane just beat the shit out of Jackson the entire match up to the DQ, and then the DQ stands? Dane is over for kicking ass, Jackson is over as the smart guy who screwed the boss and is immediately established as a heel up there with Ryan and Mikey.

Following this along, Dane could "back" someone else to take the Real World's Championship, only to blindside them after they've done so because he reveals that it wasn't so much his only shot at the belt, but it was his only shot at Sean Jackson's belt - once the belt is off Jackson he can wrestle for it.

Just my 2 cents. Still a great match and great story overall.

 

[The H.N.I.C.]

The Rundown.
I liked this opening segment, and Dan Ryan’s intro interrupting Keeb’s opening statement made the show feel very real, like say Flair coming out during a Clash of Champions interrupting Jim Ross. Strong promo work by Dan Ryan. Excellent heel work, appealing to the fans even though after what he did to LT he’s not the darling of the crowd by a longshot. Very much into Dan Ryan as the new Champ. Like the way he put over the D.O.C. (I may have tweaked the line “This title will mean something only because THIS championship means something.” To “This title will mean something only because THIS title means EVERYTHING”.--that’s nitpicking.) This was excellent!

Bronson Box vs. Jason Natas
This match to me shows the difference between an Rp based efed and an angled one. With the story that has been told with Natas, not being successful in his outings, and having been slightly out of shape, in an rp based fed it would be real easy to dismiss him. But in an angled fed, you know he’s just one win away from being a big deal. The match with Bronson Box, was a good back and forth between the archetype of what the D.O.C. is, against the heart that it will take to win and stay champion. Very well written. Box moves on deservedly so, and Natas was that much closer to that ‘one win.’

Bobby Dean vs. Mushighiara.
Funny opening sequence with Dean begin reluctant to face the God-Beast, along with Mushi and Dante promising pain and destruction, which according to how the match ended, was a pretty spot on call.

Sam Horry vs. Keyes
I wrote this, and I’ll elaborate when I call in on the show.

Comments from Aleczander.
Famous last words. This was almost like one of those Turkeys that will want everybody to admire it for it’s size and plumage, when in reality it’s about to be eaten for Thanksgiving. Then again, Alecz does have a win over FDJ. Tag match, I know, but sometimes the Turkey gets pardoned, I suppose…

Aleczander vs. FDJ
…not this time though. FDJ brought the fight, and although Alecz tried to keep up he found himself on the business end of a Mountain Top Knee Drop. I absolutely lurve the SMB’s and their progress and characters. FDJ is the division’s monster and has been booked as such, which fits. Good job of him going over strong here.

I Want My Briefcase.
Funny segment. Assuming that Cecilworth does indeed get one of those pesky contract things to come to DEFIANCE, I assume that there will be hell to pay for one Mr. L. Bruises. Not to mention that Stagehand should catch a beatdown too. The nerve of the man not to accept a $12 bribe in this day and age. What a sense of entitlement. (Stagehand is probably a millennial.)

A Warning From the Real World’s Champion.
I like Sean Jackson, and I think this angle is real cool, especially with it paying homage to Ric Flair’s angle back in ’91. It’s better because the characters are cooler, and we’ll actually get to see Jackson vs. Dane and not have to wait 3 years to see the match.

Down With This Sort of Thing.
I like the interaction between Mikey and Harmony. Mikey’s ‘holier than thou’ Hollywood schtick is done beautifully. I like that some things go beneath his notice like that he has a hot Go-Pro camera on him, and that it reveals a cluelessness he has towards pro wrestling (‘I didn’t know timeouts actually worked in pro-wrestling’) Even cooler is that he is an admitted sports entertainer, in a world (made up or otherwise) that the very word ‘sports entertainment’ is an anathema. Ballsy. Harmony, the proud champion and pro DEFIANT, gets in his face and challenges him to put up or shut up. I think DDK and Angus needed to put Harmony showing up over a bit more (DDK: IT’S THE DEFIANCE SOUTHERN HERITAGE CHAMPION!!! THIS PLACE IS GOING CRAZY!!! Angus: WHAT?! I CAN’T HEAR YOU KEEBS, THIS PLACE IS GOING CRAZY! ) And there should’ve been a ‘Harmony’ chant in place of Justin Beiber. Good Stuff though, this gives Harmony another contender and somebody she can work with. I like the impromptu-ness of their match. More on that below…

I Blow it Up Via Satellite
This is segment I like because of the dynamic between Angus and Cally. The heel announcer doing his best to hate the face character, and face character trolls the heel announcer (with the help of Mgmt, of course). I look forward to these segments as it really does give Angus a reason to hate them all.

Semi-Finals: Bronson Box vs. Mushighiara.
What a hard hitting match this was! The match itself had a big match, epic feel that could’ve easily been the finals of the tournament. Mushighiara’s monster persona is played to awesome effect here, almost like he’s Jason Voorhees, where he takes your best shot, and just keeps coming at you. Bronson Box is awesome as always as the grizzled veteran, who is dangerous not just because of his physical tools, but because he’s been there before. He’s seen them all come and go, has fought them all and has won more often times than not. The former FIST of DEFIANCE with a brutal ending to end the match because he has to go there to stop Mushighiara. Great Match!

Comments from Angel Trinidad.
From one monster, to another monster, to another monster. This felt old school in a good way, with the mouthpiece in Thomas Keeling Sr. setting the table for the showdown for either a possible rematch with Dusty Griffith, or against Frank Dylan James. Great way to possibly introduce Angel Trinidad into the D.O.C. division.

Semi-Finals: Sam Horry vs. Frank Dylan James.
I wrote this, and I’ll elaborate on it when I call on the show.

Comments from Dusty Griffith.
Good way to put over Dusty’s friendship with FDJ, and to get his prediction for FDJ to go yard with the D.O.C. tournament. Hopefully we’ll get to see Dusty vs Trinidad, but it seems like Trinidad vs FDJ is the safe bet right now.

Unannounced Match: Harmony vs. Mikey Unlikely for the Southern Heritage Championship.
This was set up well as an impromptu match, and the match itself played out better. I like that Mikey Unlikely lived up to his name as an ‘Unlikely’ challenger for Harmony’s SoHer championship, his lucking his way into offense or pinning predicaments is a fresh bit of change. The screwjob finish was done really well, as was Harmony’s portrayal as an uber face. Harmony’s chase for her belt back will be a good storyline that should carry Harmony through DEFCON. The addition of FDJ to the mix is interesting. Will have to stay tuned.

The View from V.I.P.
Awesome of them to hype the finish to the D.O.C. finals. The Queen ain’t done, and I’m looking forward to more between LT and Dan Ryan.

D.O.C. Finals: Bronson Box vs. FDJ
WOW! I loved the action from start to finish on this match. Had the big match feel to it, and as a handler who is in the division, I’ll be humble enough to say I could see why FDJ and Bronson Box were placed here, they have the longevity, and from DEF’s beginning these two were the heart and soul of what this division should be. This match was a good representation of that. I liked especially how to win the match, FDJ finished Bronson Box, the same way Bronson Box finished Mushighiara; so you could tell that FDJ was paying attention the whole tournament. I think the D.O.C. gives DEFIANCE a shot in the arm, and FDJ is a great representative to have as its face.

Comments from Dan Ryan
Strong promo again by Dan, though I would’ve like to have him put the FIST over in this promo as THE title to have, like he did in response to the D.O.C. title in his initial segment. Again this is nitpicking, it came off real well, and Dan Ryan as FIST is MONEY. Careful though champ, the Queen’s a-lurkin'

‘Real’ World Heavyweight Championship: ‘The Lone Star of Texas’ Sean Jackson vs. ‘The Only Star’ Eric Dane.
LOVED DANE’S ENTRANCE! Cutting the promo during the intro, reminded me of Mankind’s promo where he transformed to Cactus Jack against HHH in MSG in ’97. That being said, I absolutely loved the psychology of this match. It had a real old school vibe to it. Dane as the stalwart babyface, and Jackson as the dastardly heel who’ll take any shortcut to win. Thought the pacing and the placement of the false finish with the disqualification was awesome, as was Dane’s checkmate, I’m-the-boss-and-I-override-the-referee restart of the match. Kinda felt bad for Jackson as Dane kept taking him into deep water, where he eventually drowned him with the Star Drivah! Great match and way to crown Dane as the ‘Real’ World Champ.

Will this lead to a Dane vs. Ryan match to crown a Champion of all Champions?
If so, then what about the Queen?
The road to DEFCON is gonna be very interesting.

 

[Evan H.]

OPENER / RYAN PROMO
The "rundown" was written in FB chat. Fun tidbit. I agree with the above comments that Ryan should probably have been presented with a little more heel flourish. He, like 80% of the roster/especially the "main event" characters, are all riding the fence with the alignment. Because Cool-brutal-bad-ass-grit-beef slammin' characters regardless of alignment = cheers in DEF. BUT... Ryan should still be getting a majority just "boooo, hiiiisssss, fuck you" type of reactions. Good segment.

BOX / NATAS STUFF
I <3 you Murr. I got turned which ways and was working on the wrong match(es), when I needed to dive into Mushi / Box and the finals he stepped up and wrote more than a lions share of this puppy. Natas' style is PERFECT for the D.O.C. so this one really fit the whole jist of the card. The Onslaught division is the perfect place for Natas to "live."

"BOBBY DANE" / MUSHI STUFF
I can see the point of each of these "pre match statements" needing to be in a similar format... but I sort of like how each one took a kind of different shape. I like that EVERY match isn't just bang pow beef slammin'. It's why I want bobby Dean to stick around DEF for eternity, he's a fantastic booking tool. Mushi walking into the next round WAY fresher than Box after getting knocked around by Natas... considering how rebooked / f'ed in the A this card went through it's a nod to what good writers and what fans of wrestling everyone that puts finger to keyboard around this joint really are.

KEYES / HORRY STUFF
Would have liked to heard from Horry pre-match. Keyes always seeming distracted with "ill humors" and "foul winds" happening behind the scenes or in "his world" is such a fantastic deus ex machina for why Keyes is sort of a "part timer"... if and when we can really dive into Keyes again as a character, that day can't come too soon. Match was a liiiiiittle short for my taste. Needed like one more little peak and valley before the end spot which was solid as hell. Otherwise, good writing. Very clear characterization of what a straight bad-ass Sam is. another character who fits into the D.O.C. division like a damn puzzle piece.

ALECZANDER / FDJ STUFF
The pre-match statement segment was kind of wasted here. Another thing sort of lost in the wash of recent happenings. Sucks, as I'd love to have heard way more from the SMB's and a few random yarbles from Frank. It is what it is, moving on. The match itself was fuckin' great, plain and simple. Honestly, take a scoop full of this one's length and add it to the previous match and both would have been SPOT on in terms of length goes. But otherwise solid solid stuff. I'm happy so many people "get" what the D.O.C. stuff is all about. Yay.

I WANT MY BRIEFCASE
Talk about adding a fantastic new thing to play with to the DEF toy box. I haven't had a character boner after reading a segment on one of our shows since Keyes debuted. Cecilworth Farthington coming in to work an angle with Jack the jobber Hunter, another one of my favorite new toys? Shit yes. Bring on the chuckles boys. My body is ready.

(love the thought given to the long break of segments to give the competitors time to "rest" between rounds.)

DOWN WITH THIS SORT OF THING!
Mikey gets a lions share of the segment, attacks the heart of DEF, draws DATHEELHEAT. Harm comes out and ends up looking like a royal bad ass agreeing to an impromptu title defense. This is a perfectly written, entertaining seg that had an actual purpose. The potential of Mikey Unlikely in DEF is eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeendless. I'm so goddamn happy with the Utah imports man, Jesus Christ. The Hollywood Bruvs and Farthington are SUCH pure heels for DEF it's opening a lot of.... ahem... and alignment possibilities for... ummm... other members of the roster going forward. Moving on...

I BLOW IT UP VIA SATELLITE
*puts fist up against the monitor* Talk about making something great out of next to nothing. lol

BOX / MUSHI - SEMI FINAL
I wrote this one. Watched Ishii / Shibata matches on New Japan World on a loop til I was done.

COMMENTS FROM ANGEL TRINIDAD/DUSTY GRIFFITH
Good promos, sucks this all got caught up in the drama llama stampede. But all's well that ends well. Great writing is great writing. Movin' right along.

HORRY / FDJ - SEMIFINALS
Interesting sort of smooshing the "pre-match comments" segment in with the entrances. I'm usually pretty okay with that sort of stuff, but it could have been split apart with its own heading I think. Which would have maybe made it easier to see the match itself needed maybe one more little scoop full of action, as it was on the short side. But that's the joy of these Onslaught division matches, you can sell short with the right level of brutality.

UNANNOUNCED SOHER MATCH
We need to do more bookings "on the fly" like this. In fact, we need to do a lot more. I love seeing two or three big booked by the boss type matches on a card and the rest of the matches all "getting put together that night" like WWE always tends towards. Just a wrestling trope we've fallen out of utilizing as much as we should I think. For anyone that doesn't "get" Harmony, go YouTube some matches from Candice LeRae, LuFisto and current Grand Champion of CHIKARA Princess KimberLee.

Mikey Unlikely:
SLEEPER HOLD!! MAKE DEFIANCE SAFE AGAIN!!

Fuckin' love you, man. Also love the schmozy ending to death. Mikey and his clique pulling off a title coup, FDJ big brothering Harmony. Excellent wrassle' fightin', guys.

THE VIEW FROM V.I.P.
As soon as Murr and Lindz decided to merge their pre-match comment segments together I knew it was going to be solid as hell. I love the idea of these three kicking back watching the show together. The teaser hype at the end for everyone to "tune into DEFtv" was great. Remembering we're "selling the fans on next show" with everything we're writing is tantamount to anything else we're doing. That's the heart of wrestling, "oh you think this is good? Well stay tuned... "

D.O.C. FINAL
This was me. Stole the crucifix elbow thing from Daniel Bryan Danielson, obvs. I just liked the idea of the almost comical "holy fuck Frank did an actual move" followed by just brutal ruthlessness from Frankie. Remind everyone, yeah he's sort of a silly character at times but that there's a reason he's in this tourney.

A WARNING FROM THE REAL WORLDS CHAMPION / RYAN COMMENTS / MAIN EVENT
Grouping the seg from earlier in here to avoid repeating myself. I've been hot and cold on this one, another angle that took a tumble with the recent events. Love the Flair/WWF call back with the pixelated belt. Honestly I would have loved more background work on this one, some extra news bits or something. Sometimes angles get swallowed up a little when they live exclusively on cards. This one needed a little selling that just wasn't provided. Props to Justin, the old man and especially Murr on producing a great main event despite the "real life" circumstances.