CALGARY 2ND: WildStar vs. Beau Michaels

[TH]

The Five Star Athlete takes on the Bi-Sexual King of the Club Kids.

Star Beat:
Logan Caine

Beau Beat:
Cameron Cruise

 

[GreggG]

Can U Cnt 2 5?

(CUT TO: WildStar, in his singlet, in front of his empty wrestling ring in his warehouse/training academy.)

STAR: I'm going to get right to the point. I know my opponent, "BiSexual" Beau Michaels has been a controversial figure in the circut the past few years. Beau -- I'm going to get this right out of the way right now. Your sexual preferences... none of that means a thing to me. You can check my income statements. For years, I've given plenty of support through my (does the FIVE STAR HAND GESTURE) Five Star Charities to the gay community. Gay Men's Health Crisis? ACT Up? Teen runaway shelters? They've all been a recipient of my largesse. Hell -- me and my wife have even marched for more government support.

Beau, I support the GLBT community in its endeavors. I believe you should have the right to marry, the right to hold another man's hand, the right to do whatever it is you damn well please. I find you a breathtaking change of pace from the average knuckledragger in this sport. I think you're brave and courageous for taking the stand that you have taken.

But just know this -- when you step in the ring with me, you're my enemy, you're my opponent. And I don't give one sh(BLEEP) about who sucks your d(BLEEP) after the show. In the ring, you're just someone in the path of the only man in this sport who is a (does the FIVE STAR HAND GESTURE) FIVE STAR WRESTLER. And that's the only thing that matters.

Because in the ring, Michaels... I Am Superman. And I Can Do Anything. In the ring, Michaels... I Am Superman. And, baby... I Am What's Happening. ONE TWO THREE FOUR FIVE! (Does the Five Star Hand Gesture. FTB)

 

[TheOriginalSE]

(We fade in to a pink background. Beau Michaels stands there, completely naked, swiveling his hips as the "I'm A Slave 4 U" Britney Spears Remix off her "B in the Mix: the Remixes" CD plays in the background.)

"Ohhhhhhhhhh yea .... You know there's nothing like .... a good beat ..... a pink backdrop ......... and the opportunity to roll around in the ring with another oiled up man in the ring that gets me....... ready."

(Michaels grabs some baby oil from off the stool next to him and flips open the cap with his tongue... he tips the bottle straight up over his chest and squeezes as hard as he can .... the oil begins to pour out and onto his chest.)

"Wildstar .... mmmmmmmmm .... such a supporter of the Gay community ...... you know what you could really do to support me, honey? Why don't you come on over...."

(Michaels drops the baby oil bottle and starts rubbing the oil all over his chest and stomach ...)

"..... and give me the FIVE FINGER SALUTE ...."

(Michaels' hands disappear beneath his waist and off screen ... his arm begins motioning back and forth..)

"Yea .... that would really help me out ..... So ... (he bats his eyelashes) Mister Thuperman .... why don't you fly into my part of town .... and wisk me away to safety. Because I want to find out if you really CAN ... (bites his bottom lip and smiles seductively) do ANYTHING...."

(Michaels' face contorts into one of pleasure as he begins to swivel his hips .... his eyes roll up into the back of his head as he grits his teeth.)

"Mmmph.... I've already shown Cammy what happens when you **** with the King of the Club Kids ... I've already shown the world that I will do whatever ..... and baby, I mean whatever... ohhhhhhhh.... it takes to get the job done."

(Michaels looks back at the camera and breathes heavily...)

"One ... two ... three ... four ... five ... six ... seven ... eight ... nine ... ten inches, honey... I'll be waiting for you..."

(Michaels brings his oiled up hands back into view of the camera ... he places them up to the camera a la Wildstar with his five star salute)

"But tell me ... are you ready for all this?"

(The camera fades as Beau Michaels licks his top lip from side to side .... and walks up to the camera...)

 

[GreggG]

(CUT TO: WildStar, in his gym)

WILDSTAR: Well, Beau, I already said I was ready for you. Didn't you hear that?

Look, my man. I'm not here to talk about your penis. I'm here to talk about wrestling. What you stick your penis into -- I'm fine with it. If you wanna talk GLBT issues with me, I'm with you, my man -- me and my wife are very supportive of the community, AIDS research and other issues.

I'm just here to beat you... FIVE STARS style.

(FTB)