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AGiorgetti
08-24-02, 04:47 PM
[updated:LAST EDITED ON Aug-24-02 AT 03:58 PM (EDT)]The Male Intrusion

(Aelieas Fierte and Gabriel are shown sitting in a booth, eating lunch in a small town diner. Townsfolk are around the two men, carrying on with ordinary day occurrences. Aelieas bites into his burger, then taking a sip of his drink realizing he is on camera. His hair is braided back and like always his face painted with heritage. Aelieas points to the camera, showing Gabriel that they were being watched. Aelieas thought for a couple of seconds, dipping his french fries into his favorite Heinz ketchup right before he began his rant.)

Aelieas: Steve Radder, I hung in to the very end, you got lucky, next time you won’t be so lucky and that’s the end of that story. Its time to move on and talk about the next low life in this never ending cesspool of CSWA talent, and that man being Eddie Mayfield. One of the members of the newly acclaimed “Intruders” and all I have to say about that is big deal. All you have done Eddie is made a group of half functional losers who need each other to catch the fan’s attention, ‘cuz lets face it, you’re just not “Hot Stuff” anymore.

Gabriel: Hey Aelieas, I thought you had your own conspiracy about what the “Intruders” are all about?

(Aelieas grinned for a second, releasing what Gabriel has brought to his attention, then carries on with talking.)

Aelieas: Ah, yes, thank you very much Gabriel for bringing that to my attention. You see I have known this for years, and I am glad “The Intruders” are finally coming out publicly about it. You see not only is the “Intruders” a great way to bore not only me but the world it is a way for them to come out of the closet cuz well all know that secretly it is called “The Male Intruders”. You have the very so famous, BUNZ, the strongest cheeks in the world, and the word on the gay underground is well, these cheeks can take a pounding. Then there is the ever so “Cocky” Craig Pedophile, always bringing bedroom lust to the 6th grade boys gym locker rooms of the world.

(Aelieas looks over at Gabriel laughing, before continuing with his theory)

Aelieas: Last but not least, the ring leader of this circle of sailors and coal miners, “Hot Men” Eddie Playmale. The ruler of all gayness, the epitome of all men nakedness, and most of all the man who’s picture is posted not only on Elton John’s wall but every single heterosexual in the world. But don’t worry Eddie, during are match I will be beating you so bad you won’t even have a chance to feel me over like you do to most of your opponents. Hell, I will be beating you so bad, with all my greatness, you just might get an erection. Well Eddie, seeing as your not worth MY time, I am going to leave you to ponder your own sexuality while I get ready for will be an easy win.

(The camera fades to Aelieas and Gabriel finishing their lunch.)

Packschmid
08-24-02, 05:27 PM
(FADEIN: GUNS watching the promo.)

GUNS: Wow, they let anybody talk to a camera these days, don't they? (Shakes head. FADEOUT)

EastPrez
08-25-02, 11:26 AM
[updated:LAST EDITED ON Aug-25-02 AT 10:28 AM (EDT)](NOTE: Recorded before the ON TIME Intruders debacle, for continuity.)

(FADEIN: To 'Hot Property' EDDIE MAYFIELD, with a handheld digital camcorder strapped over his hand, watching that lame promo of Alies Fierte in the viewfinder. EDDIE cringes, shuts the camera off, and looks up)

MAYFIELD: "Listen kid, if thats' the best you can do, then you and Butthead best get back in your moms' minivan, and go back home to her basement where you live.

Next time the producers tell you to do some camera time, put the latest issue of CRACK'D magazine down, and try to do something that at least makes SENSE. Here, this is what you SHOULD have said:

(Clears throat) "Ahem. Eddie Mayfield, due to the fact that I can't attempt to lay down a coherent promo, it shows that I wasn't paying attention in wrestling school, because I was too busy skipping class to take care of my pregnant pre-teen girlfriend, whos' mother really didn't like the fact that I quit my job at the Moo and Oink to become a 'wrassler'. Please, I apologize for wasting the CSWA's video tape, YOUR time, Mr. Mayfield, and the brain cells of the CSWA 'fans' for having to listen to my bile. And my friend, this indy jobber guy next to me who I paid to eat a sandwich with? Well, he apologizes as well. Thank you, and God Bless."

Aerola? Dood - don't bother showing the f(BLEEP!) up."

(FADEOUT as MAYFIELD just shakes his head)