View Full Version : Round 1: Shawn Jessica Hart vs. Bob Praxis (j)

04-20-12, 06:56 AM
Roleplay period starts on Wednesday, April 25 and ends Tuesday, May 1. 2 roleplay max in this round.

04-27-12, 11:09 PM

Stock footage smash cuts of the Korean War.

CUT TO: A clip of perhaps a hundred men kneeling in unison before the Wailing Wall.

CUT TO: Various shots of lions, tigers, and hyenas devouring their prey on the African plains.

CUE UP: Super INTENSE orchestral swells.

Suddenly, the images flashing on the screen are covered in a Bond-esque blood drizzle. A text scroll in ROCKING Palatino Linotype appears in a BIG, BOLD way, accompanied by the narration of that famous voice from movie trailers....

"Fourteen years ago...an INDUSTRY was in the depths of despair!"

CUT TO: Footage of some of Bob Praxis' less-than-stellar moments in the ring.

"It was lame balls...and the PEOPLE were forced to REVOLT!!

CUT TO: Footage of various large-scale labor disputes and strikes throughout history.

"Until ONE DAY, a bad-ass mother was birthed by Gaia herself..."

CUT TO: The sexy pectorals and washboard abs of some magnificent warrior.

"To DESTROY that industry's past, and recreate its SWEET future in his own, JIGGY image!!"

CUT TO: The warrior's boots; traditional wrestling style with the notable exception of taxi-cab yellow and black sequins and a diamond-encrusted emblem reading simply...HART.

"And in that moment, when this stone cold PLAYER was able to PENETRATE the industry with his throbbing life essence..."

CUT TO: The warrior's backside...tight, yet bountiful and adorned with crushed velvet.

"Sh(FCC)t.... got serious!!"

CUT TO: A wide-shot of the warrior with his back to the camera, and his front facing a video projection of PRO WRESTLING's SJH, the nefarious Shawn Jessica Hart, capturing various titles.

"NOW... fourteen years later, Gaia's chosen SAVIOR, the man with the GOLDEN HAIR and the sinuous BUTTOCKS is going to do it all.... over.... again!!!"

The warrior flips himself around toward the camera, and with an Elvis-like pelvis shake steps forward...

SJH: "And this time.... I'm riding BAREBACK!!"




"Pro Wrestling's S-J-H is going ULTRA...BE THERE....because your very EXISTENCE just.....MIGHT.......DEPEND ON IT!!!"

SJH: "Yeah, no.... that's not true at all."

"If you're not there, a man will come to your house..."

SJH: "Ummm...."

"Steal all your sh(FCC)t.."

SJH: "Whoa, whoa.. hold up a sec..."

"Convert your children to Mormonism..."

SJH: "Hey, the Mormons are nice people!"

"And F(FCC)CK your wife right in the ass!!"

SJH: "OK, well that one actually sounds pretty SWEET!"


SJH:"Yeeeeeeeeahh, boyeeee!!!!"

"Catch PRO WRESTLING'S SJH in the ULTRATITLE TOURNEY. It's on your TV sets now, b(FCC)tch!!"