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View Full Version : EW Torch: Crash 47 Review



jediPREZ
04-17-09, 05:05 PM
I have no clue who's running this site, but this was very cool to read. Its essentially an 'in-character' review of a show. :cool:

http://ewtorch.blogspot.com/2009/04/nfw-crash-tv-47-report.html

suddenimpact
04-17-09, 05:30 PM
Neither do I, but I like it.

But I wish someone, somewhere, somehow would've gotten the point of Impulse's unmasking. :(

Legion
04-17-09, 05:46 PM
I thought it was about that Impulse had proved himself enough tand gained the confidence to show himself without fear of repurcussions myself, probably wrong but least I give it a shot!

suddenimpact
04-17-09, 07:21 PM
I thought it was about that Impulse had proved himself enough tand gained the confidence to show himself without fear of repurcussions myself, probably wrong but least I give it a shot!

Well, yeah, that's part of it - as his story goes he wanted to be completely anonymous until a certain point, and get over and be successful (if he could) on ability alone - and when the Sears Tower came to pass it seemed to make sense to me and to Katz when he wrote it, that if he won the TV Title it would be time.

But the whole thing about "Who is Randall Knox and why should we care?" can really be summed up by his first catchphrase - the messenger is not important. That's the part that a lot of people seem to have missed.

LQJT86C
04-17-09, 07:38 PM
Longing for the Dudley Boyz entrance, WHAT?! Get the f*ck out of here, ya pr*ck. The Rolling Stones rule, especially when I type out their lyrics, now go eat my ass.

LQJT86C
04-17-09, 07:51 PM
One more comment. The dude is complaining how I focused more on the antics and not on the wrestling. Hey, retard, it was a jobber match. You want three pages worth of suplexes and other crotch grabbing homo erotic maneuvers? Or do you wanna read some crazy batsh*t type stuff I thought up while high on sugar and energy drinks? Next time I do a Mylde spot at Crash, I'm breaking Kayfabe and calling this guy's mother a wh*re.

suddenimpact
04-17-09, 07:54 PM
One more comment. The dude is complaining how I focused more on the antics and not on the wrestling. Hey, retard, it was a jobber match. You want three pages worth of suplexes and other crotch grabbing homo erotic maneuvers? Or do you wanna read some crazy batsh*t type stuff I thought up while high on sugar and energy drinks? Next time I do a Mylde spot at Crash, I'm breaking Kayfabe and calling this guy's mother a wh*re.


You know, in tA, every time someone would criticize us, I would kill them.

This works in a NFW parallel universe. But he likes me so you should be nice.

Leary
04-17-09, 08:29 PM
Hey, retard, it was a jobber match. You want three pages worth of suplexes and other crotch grabbing homo erotic maneuvers? Or do you wanna read some crazy batsh*t type stuff I thought up while high on sugar and energy drinks? Next time I do a Mylde spot at Crash, I'm breaking Kayfabe and calling this guy's mother a wh*re.

Have you ever read a Scott Keith or a PWTorch Raw "report" before? That's all this was. I'm pretty sure it had nothing to do with your writing ability. ;)

jediPREZ
04-17-09, 08:39 PM
One more comment. The dude is complaining how I focused more on the antics and not on the wrestling. Hey, retard, it was a jobber match. You want three pages worth of suplexes and other crotch grabbing homo erotic maneuvers? Or do you wanna read some crazy batsh*t type stuff I thought up while high on sugar and energy drinks? Next time I do a Mylde spot at Crash, I'm breaking Kayfabe and calling this guy's mother a wh*re.

Billy...

It was "IN-CHARACTER," I think the review isn't a literal review of the show, but someone emulating Scott Keith as Leary said.

Schmid did a similar thing for us during the Yahoo Groups days.

Although, I'm guessing the sugar and energy drinks comment means you know that. :cool:

LEARY --- I suspect you're writing these, but I'm not willing to go all-in on that bet.

LQJT86C
04-17-09, 08:48 PM
Billy...

It was "IN-CHARACTER," I think the review isn't a literal review of the show, but someone emulating Scott Keith as Leary said.

Schmid did a similar thing for us during the Yahoo Groups days.

Although, I'm guessing the sugar and energy drinks comment means you know that. :cool:



Relax guys, I was half-kidding. :cool:

But if it's in character, why is he referring to "match-writing?"

jediPREZ
04-17-09, 09:06 PM
Relax guys, I was half-kidding. :cool:

But if it's in character, why is he referring to "match-writing?"

The character is an eWrestling smark?

Maybe the character sees through the 4th wall of the universe?

LQJT86C
04-17-09, 09:20 PM
The character is an eWrestling smark?

Maybe the character sees through the 4th wall of the universe?

I think he's overweight and sits at his computer all day eating cheetos and drinking Dr. Pepper cans that he handcrushes and throws on top of his couch full of cat hair, sweat stains, and animal bite marks. F*ck this f*cker, I'm putting him in my next Castor RP. :eek:


:D:D:D:D:D:D

Leary
04-17-09, 09:34 PM
LEARY --- I suspect you're writing these, but I'm not willing to go all-in on that bet.

Awwwww, go all in. ;)

And for the record, I'm only about 10 pounds overweight, don't like cheetos, rarely drink any soda (just occasionally a Barqs), hate cats (evil fuckers), am a little smelly at the moment, but don't own a couch. But I do have a nice love seat recliner if you wanna kiss and make up. ;)

Evil James
04-17-09, 09:46 PM
I just talked with Biff and he told me that he wants to "castrate that reviewer with a cattle prod" the first chance he gets. :D

LQJT86C
04-17-09, 09:47 PM
Awwwww, go all in. ;)

And for the record, I'm only about 10 pounds overweight, don't like cheetos, rarely drink any soda (just occasionally a Barqs), hate cats (evil fuckers), am a little smelly at the moment, but don't own a couch. But I do have a nice love seat recliner if you wanna kiss and make up. ;)


LMAO, boy do I feel like a horse's patoot!

Dude, you should have let me keep going.

Evil James
04-17-09, 10:32 PM
One more comment. The dude is complaining how I focused more on the antics and not on the wrestling. Hey, retard, it was a jobber match. You want three pages worth of suplexes and other crotch grabbing homo erotic maneuvers? Or do you wanna read some crazy batsh*t type stuff I thought up while high on sugar and energy drinks? Next time I do a Mylde spot at Crash, I'm breaking Kayfabe and calling this guy's mother a wh*re.

This is the best response ever. Biff also approves. Him and Screech both told me that they agree that it is highly intelligent and tells it like it is, kind of like David Jericho but in a more colorful manner. :p

LQJT86C
04-17-09, 10:55 PM
Well go read 'Castorpocalypse NOW' and scroll down to find Biff Busey's mention, and then tell me how you feel. :D

DWoods
04-18-09, 01:33 PM
This was actually a really good recap/review. Way better than those that contain absolutely no detail.

Frozen Atlantic
04-18-09, 08:14 PM
i was entertained.

EastPrez
04-19-09, 09:22 PM
I have no clue who's running this site, but this was very cool to read. Its essentially an 'in-character' review of a show. :cool:

http://ewtorch.blogspot.com/2009/04/nfw-crash-tv-47-report.html

Management approves! :cool: