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View Full Version : [CD] The Iceman Apologizes



GreggG
10-04-05, 10:59 PM
(CUT TO: The NEW Backstage "Power Center" curtain. Jason Tripp stands before it in a suit and tie and a band-aid on his left cheek.)

JASON TRIPP: Folks, Jason Tripp back again, this time to tell you all bout our next Rapture Show. It's going to be a great show, top to bottom. You can just FEEL the intensit--

(Jason pauses and stares, backpedalling a little bit. From the left walk "Iceman" Kevin Kearns -- vest, "Kevin" tat, black vest with interlocking KK "ice" design. Next to him is Lady Violet -- bangs sprayed up, cleavage exposed, wearing her tattered prom dress. Kevin, this time, is holding a plaid courdoroy suit jacket on a hanger.)

TRIPP: What are you doing here? I... I... I don't have any problems with you.

KK: Naw, I... I know you don't. I, I came out here to apologize. Y'see, Jason, I've been through a lot and seen a lot. I was in prison for cracking open that ATM machine outside the Wawa, and it's put me on the defensive. That ain't right of me, especially not now, since I'm back in wrestling to show the power of redemption and recovery, that you can overcome your past mistakes like addiction to painkillers and-or addiction to alcohol. And because of that, my man, I owe you an apology.

(Kevin stares at Lady Violet coldly. She looks at Kevin who mouths something to her indecipherable. She then gets on her knees before Jason Tripp, who is shocked.)

LADY VIOLET: Jason Tripp, I am truly sorry for what happened to you. I promise you that it will never happen again. The stages of recovery dictate I must apologize to you --

TRIPP: This... this is ridiculous. I --

(Lady Violet gets back off her knees as Tripp starts to walk away.)

KK: No, man. Naw... come on. I... I'm not done. Tripp, man-- (He turns back.) I, I bought this here coat for you on layaway, since I think I tore your nice suit jacket. And next time you come on here and television you can wear this nice suit (Kevin starts to put the plaid suit on Tripp. It has elbow patches and is about 5 sizes too big.) on television and make your momma proud.

TRIPP: Okay... okay. Is, is that all?

KK: Not quite yet. Also, for your pain and suffering, I got you something else. (Kevin reaches into Lady Violet's cleavage and pulls out a plastic card.) I got you this $25 gift card to Best Buy, so you can get yourself a DVD or maybe a plasma screen TV or something.

LV: Yeah, Tripp, honey. We wanted to do something nice for you. You seem like a nice boy and all, the type of boy the fans can really respect. Because them fans, that's what's really important to us now and to this sport.

TRIPP: Why, thank you Lady Violet--

(Kevin all of a sudden snatches his head up. His eyes get REAL wide open and he starts foaming at the mouth like an animal. He then turns right to Tripp and gets in his face.

KK: WHY DO YOU ALWAYS TRY AND **** MY WOMAN? HUH? HUH YOU PIECE OF ****?

(Tripp starts nervously backing away.)

KK: HUH, MOTHER****ER? I'M OUT HERE TRYIN' TO BE A ROLE MODEL AND **** AND YOU'RE OUT HERE TRYING TO **** MY WOMAN RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. ESPECIALLY AFTER I BOUGHT YOU THAT NICE SUIT AND TOOK THAT GIFT CARD FOR YOU, MOTHER****ER.

TRIPP: Look, Kevin, I-- I don't know what to say. I'm sorry--

KK: **** THAT NOISE.

LV: Kevin, honey, stop! That nice boy didn't mean nuthin' by this--

KK: SHUT UP! LET ME HANDLE MY MAN BUSINESS.

(Kevin then clocks Tripp and is ripping the plaid suit as he hovers over him, yelling "Mother****er" over and over again.)

KK: YOU GONNA MAKE ME SEE MY SPONSOR AGAIN, MOTHER****ER. WHAT IF HE DON'T PICK UP HIS BEEPER? WHAT THEN, MOTHER****ER? YOU'RE GONNA BE RESPONSIBLE FOR THE **** I DO THEN, MOTHER****ER. YOU PIECE OF ****.

(Kevin then spits on him and walks off. Lady Violet looks at him, shaking.)

LV: This... this is all my fault. Here... take this.

(She drops another Best Buy gift card onto Tripp. Kevin then grabs her by her hair and pulls her off-screen. FTB.)