View Full Version : [CD] The Iceman Cometh

10-04-05, 01:44 AM
(Standing in front of a NEW Rapture banner is Jason Tripp, in his suit and tie, holding an old-style microphone.)

TRIPP: Well, folks, today it is with great pleasure I bring to you a newcomer here to NEW. But he's not a newcomer to our sport. Longtime fans of this industry will probably remember him well. This time, he's back and he's here on a mission... a mission of redemption. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you "Iceman" Kevin Kearns with his wife, Lady Violet.

(From the right come Kevin Kearns and Lady Violet. Kearns has a faded bleach blonde mullet to the base of his neck and also has a brown beard. He's wearing a black leather vest which his his initials KK interlocked in cubic zirconium "ice" design, black trunks which say "KK" in the same pattern on his cock. He is blinking rapidly. Lady Violet is what you would describe as "big." She's got big, dyed blonde hair with bangs and a Texan bouffant and is at least a size 11 -- large, droopy breasts with a tattoo of a rose peeking out of her ripped prom dress. Her and Kevin also have matching tatoos on their necks -- both of them, in black cursive, say "Kevin.")

KK: Well, my man, it's good to be here, let me tell you that.

TRIPP: And just where have you been, Kevin?

KK: Well, my man, let me tell you that. I've been in work-release for the past couple of years or so. Y'see, I got caught in the middle of the pharmacy department of a CVS at about 4 in the morning a few years back. I had a hankering for some somas and some vicadins because of life on the road. I had a sore neck, a sore back, a sore everything. And I needed those drugs to get me by, and I didn't have any. So I drove my Camaro right through the front window and headed to where the pain medication was located at and that's where I got caught. I've been in detox and prison and work-release since then. But... I know I made some mistakes. I paid my debt to society. So, I got back together with my ex here, Lady Violet, the first lady of West Texas, and decided to make a go of it again. This time, tho, I'm going to use wrestling to warn people against the dangers of drugs and alcohol. That stuff's no good and I want to help out the younger generation.

TRIPP: And just where have you been, Lady Violet?

LV: Well, y'know, been doin' this and that since me and Kevin split up and he got put in lock-up. I did some work makin' some candy apples with the local carnival circut sometimes, but usually I couldn't be too far away from home in case Kevin called and also because of my credit rating. But I always had the fans in my heart and in my thoughts, because that's why I got into this sport, because of the people. And I know--

(Kevin elbows her aside and snatches Tripp's hand. He squeezes it. His eyes lite up BIG -- there is now no soul there. Just rage.)

KK: Excuse me, motherf*cker. Were you looking at my wife's titties?

TRIPP: No -- I, I---

LV: Kevin, stop it right now! Leave this nice man alone--

KK: (Turns to Lady Violet) Shut the f*ck up and let me handle my business. Now, I just saw you look at my wife's big titties. You think that's funny, huh? You think that's cool to try and f*ck my wife?

(He grabs Tripp by the suit lapel.)

TRIPP: No, I wasn't doing anything --

LV: Kevin, stop it. Please!

KK: (Turns to Lady Violet) Shut the f*ck up, because you probably want other guys to f*ck you just like how you was born, illegitimate. Now, m*ther****er, you think I'm here to play a game? Huh? I spent two years with an ankle bracelet, I'm itchin' to kick a motherf*cker's skull in. HUH?

(He tosses Tripp to the ground and spits on him. Then he points to the camera.)

KK: Ain't none of you motherf*ckers going to look at my wife or f*ck my wife unless EYE say so. Come on, let's get the f*ck out of here, I gotta call my sponsor now because of you.

(He grabs her by the hair as they walk off.)

LV: You mean my step-daddy?