View Full Version : Cruise v Entertainment

01-21-05, 01:39 PM
All RP for the match between CAMERON CRUISE and MR. ENTERTAINMENT at RAUCOUS should be done in this folder. Any RP posted outside of the folder will not count.

The RP deadline is 11:59pm on Saturday, January 29th. Angles should be sent to sedmunds@goucher.edu ..

01-22-05, 05:59 PM
"If only Joey were here to see this."

(Fadein, Cameron Cruise in front of an NEW ERA RAUCOUS backdrop.)

CRUISE: Then I'd actually get visible and viable proof that Cameron Cruise has finally come to the point in his career where in order to continue to entertain the fans....he's got to beat up the ENTERTAINMENT to do it.

Actually...strike that. Given the situation with that in specific....who know's what'd he come up with.

"Mister Entertainment" Stephen Forester.

What an intriguing moniker.

I mean, not that the one that was given to me was anymore original...at least mine grabs you by the throat in a figurative way of speaking. You by all rights and knowledge have at ONE match this past week against another kid tryin' to make it in this business, no different than you.

You also seem to have the idea that the fans want....the fans NEED to be entertained, to be dazzled, and amazed by the millions. Well Stephen....it's theory already conceived of, but hey....there's nothing like goin' ol' fashioned (Cruise gives a thumbs-up).

'Course, while you're just starting to do that...I've been entertaining and amazing and a-rat-tat-tatting the crowd for about ten years now, not to mention selling out arena's and packin' seats this past one an' a half years now so badly....it almost makes the sellout rate of Joey Melton's "Best of...." series of Hardcore matches with Midgets look bad.


But there's nothing like improvement son and within every win I achieve, I take one more step to taking over that spot, something that I'm sure even little Adrien Evans would love to get past and move on with.

So let's do us and lil' Adrien Evans a favor and help ol' Cammy rid Adrien of the constant nightmares that he has every time he sets foot aboard a boat and you take one for the team, how 'bout it??

'Cause whether or not you like it.....when you set foot in the ring with ME....you're going to want to re-think your nickname that some bored middle-aged man in Oregon gave you just to lift up your spirits for a career move when Folger's couldn't.

Because once you do....it's a Reality Check that you just won't be....ENTERTAINED BY.


01-24-05, 04:08 PM
[FADE IN. A New ERA backdrop, in front of which, wearing a studded leather jacket, stands the most entertaining man in sports and entertainment, with a message for all to hear]

ME: Ya see tha’s what I’m talkin’ about. Cammy, Payne… no-one cared ‘bout your match. They didn’t see either of ya before hand and when your match came about, they left the room, turned on the kettle, and the grid had a sudden surge. Hell, I’m surprised you guys had any lights fer ya match. Half expectin’ the grid ta blow.

Much like you at the best a’ times.

Ya see, Cameo, I’ve seen ya around. Seen ya with Joey Melton. And it’s clear tha’ he’s the one carrying your ass. He’s the reason people’re even remotely interested in ya. They tune in ta see the amazing feat of Joey Melton, that old fossil, making you look good. Now, that’s unbe-f***ing-lievable. A man as good as you claim ta be needin’ to be carried by him.

But this week at RAUCOUS you ain’t gonna have Joey ta carry ya ta a good match. No. You’ve got someone far better. Someone who in his second match has moved up ta mid-card on the flagship show. Not somethin’ you’d expect from someone who you paint out ta be just a name. Now, maybe my moniker ain’t great. But hey, I’m an honest guy. I don’t get people confusin’ me fer a porn star. Maybe that’s how ya managed ta stay employed before Melton took pity on ya; people thought they’d get ta see some action.

Then they saw it was you and took a piss break.

Oh, you’ll talk tough, Cammy. But when it comes down to it you haven’t got a chance in hell of winning the match. About the most entertainin’ thing you’re gonna do this week is thank God you got spots over in other companies ta pay yer bills, because you know if it was done on pure entertainment value, you’d be straight at the unemployment line. You simply can’t keep up with the show. The entertainment. The razzle dazzle snazzle that is… ME. Mebbe ya’ll gonna come out with a towel wrapped round ya this week. You’ve already stolen one porn stars gimmick, and we all know Val’s a damn sight more entertainin’ than you are.

Because this reality check ya’ll keep talkin’ ‘bout… ain’t gonna happen. And I don’t care if you like it or not. Because it’s all about ME.

[Mr Entertainment turns his back to the camera, revealing the studding on the back of his jacket]

ME: Mr. Entertainment.


01-25-05, 05:00 PM
(Fadein, Cameron Cruise in front of an NEW ERA backdrop.)

CRUISE: You know the last person I heard of to wear a 'star-studded' leather jacket like you're wearing Stephen is not only NOT being asked for interviews, but his very orientation is questioned everytime he's seen stepping in front of urinals.

Which if you think about it.....

It pretty much goes without saying that he's not really one to be up for the next season of "The Surreal Life".

But seeing as you've never met me before Stephanie, I can only suppose that you're one of those folks who's pretty easy going when it comes to meeting new people that you've given me your version of a nickname.

You've claimed that in facing me you've already jumped up to mid-card and that you seen me around wrestling matches with Melton.

First of all kid, just because you've had one match doesn't mean that you're any good.

Second, believe it or not the boss didn't give you a promotion to mid-card because you had a nice showing. Fact of the matter is kid, you're what's called "WRESTLING FODDER", which means that you're not anybetter than anyone else trying to make their first buck and getting exposed on TV, which again, goes to show that you can't help but see that unoriginality is your only focus on for offense against me.

If trying to associate me with porn stars and saying that Melton carries me around the ring from venue to venue is the best that you can do...then hey....

Pick the broom up and get back to work, because the way I see it....

Being a perverted eavsdropper in EPW will only get you on Ryan's bad side.

An' believe me Stephan....that's one place you don't wanna be at.

I'll even let you ask Joey.....but you might end up washing his drawers first.


01-27-05, 05:16 PM
"Ya know...it's kinda funny."

(Fadein, Cameron Cruise in front of an NEW ERA backdrop.)

CRUISE: Whenever Stephen Forester wants to come out and ENTERTAIN the crowd and dazzle some other two-bit-hack that's easily amused by encyclopedias and smart people alike...

(Cruise snaps his fingers.)

No problem.

But then when someone twenty-times better comes along that actually presents himself with a CHALLENGE.....

You couldn't bribe him to answer, if you had MWG promise him all the lusty-dripping-with-sweat-orgasmic hookers bangin' down his door every hour, on the hour.

Oh sure...I'm sure he'll come back with something related back towards the adult industry while playing "Don't All The Girls Get Prettier At Closing Time" by Mickey Gilley or some remark about me taggin' with Joey Melton bein' some kinda bad thing for Joey.

Is there some kinda two-drink-minimum where you hang out Stephen??

After all....hey I can understand, I can even be flattered if you like.

The Cameron Cruise Project is THE HOTTEST THING goin' this side of the universe!! Think about it!! All the great paired up men in the business, packed seats in the studios to watch 'em do what they do best, and that's amaze them with god-given talent.

Joey Melton and Cameron Cruise: Two guys that sellout venues and small villages and cities with the ability they possess to contest (Rhyme not intended.).

Starsky an' Hutch: Same thing.

Jake an' tha Fatman.....two guys.

Cagney an' Lacey....in Joey's opinion....two guys!!

Fact of the matter is Mister....is that you're light years ahead of where you need to be, and perhaps for you that might be an insight.

But then again....given your lack of Originality and the sake of fightin' your own fight without YOUR OWN reportoire.....

Maybe it's up to me again after all to pick up the slack like usual and give the fans something that they relish in remembering rather than see some nin-com-poop bebop down the aisle and THINK himself something of substance with fake attitude runnin' through his veins.

Believe me Stephen....it's not the first time I've had to do it.

And with your cooperation....pulling it off and getting things ready to go for the next show will go more smoothly than fooling the likes of DREDD on a bad day.

Because that's a REALITY CHECK Mister Entertainment...that you just....won't like.



01-29-05, 07:06 PM
[FADE IN. A darkened hotel room, the only light coming from the TV. Cameron Cruise's latest vignette (the wrestler, not the porn star. Unfortunately) is about half way through. As it plays to it's conclusion, we can see the outline of a figure trying his best not to fall asleep. As the vignette stops, the most Entertaining man there is tosses the remote onto the covers. He's wearing a white T-shirt as he sits up, his back against the headrest. And he's got something to say]

ME: Ya know, tha' was just what I needed ta get me ta the land of nod right there, Cammy. So full of good ol' fashioned bull-s*** too. But hey, I know, I know. It ain't easy entertainin' the masses. It's a job you're just... not cut out for.

You say I'm the one tryin' ta fob you off like some porn star. Mebbe that's why you ain't entertainin'. Ya'll need some intelligence for that. Sure, more than ya need ta figure out yer name. And that's yer problem. You can't even see how easy it is fer people ta grab a hold of yer name. Nice marketing ploy ta get the young male demographic ta tune in. But then they see ya, and... piss break.

Now, I'm sure you've sent the audience ta sleep already with your tired... boring... drivel. Heck, that's OK, they need their rest after seeing the greatest entertainer on this planet. But, Cruise... don't flatter yerself. Fact of the matter is I had better things ta do with my time then lowering myself to your level.

The level of a cheap, carried, over-the-hill-before-he-reached-the-summit, boring "superstar".

You're only God-given talent son is sittin' on ol' Melton's coattails. Now, if I were some jacked up and self-inulgent punk like you I'd maybe say something like when I'm done kickin' yer ass you ain't gonna be able ta do that, but then I'd just be you. A no talent and frankly... BORING individual.

Maybe, Cammy, you can actually manage to ENTERTAIN people before you try runnin' yer mouth? Maybe get Melton ta teach ya while he's draggin' ya around? Because until you do yer gonna be runnin' in the same circles as no-talents like most of the EPW roster. I mean, anybody that'd give a dullard like "The Dragon" a shot at the IC title must really lead a ship of no-hopers. An' claimin' ta be at the top there is like claimin' a feud with John Doe here.

Waste of everybodies time.

Don't waste the people's time, Cammy. Change yer damn name if ya don't like being compared ta a porn-freak. Hell, change it ta Poe if you like. Copy a totally different type a' film. Anything to make yerself more entertaining, getting punters interested in the product. Because right now, they ain't payin' ta see you.

But you keep thinkin' that when yer staring at them lights, wondering where yer career's gonna go. After all, Cameron, who's ta say management ain't seein' ya as the wrestlin' fodder?

[Mr Entertainment picks up the remote, turning off the TV. The screen is black, but we can still here him sinking under the covers to go to sleep. After all, a boring promo does that to people. FADE OUT]


OoC: Sorry. Meant to get soemthing up a couple of days ago, but have been in and out of hospital with chest pains. Ah, well, lol.