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NCross
05-30-03, 10:16 AM
The alarm goes off. It’s 6am. It’s early. It’s time for the Crossovers to remember why they watch the CSWA. A limp hand slaps the snooze. A bright light encircles that hand and follows the arm up to a ragged comforter. The hand pushes the comforter from over his head, showing for the first time, Nathan Cross in all his early morning glory. He squints his eyes, screams a curse word or two, and then recovers his head. After a few moments, he removes the cover. Nathan, the king of the Crossovers, Cross shields his eyes from the camera’s light. A crown of hair atop his head, he grumbles his commands. You’re not sure what those commands are, but by the voicetone, you can tell they ARE commands.

NC: (translated while omitting various expletives) Why are you here?

Off Camera: You need to cut a promo to push Battle of the Belts.

NC: (rolls over and recovers his head) I’ll wait until On Time hits the airwaves.

OC: It did… this week. No one called you?

NC: WHAT! (Jumps out of bed. The great question of ‘boxers or briefs’ is answered for all those who care. It’s neither, or maybe just a censor bar. He follows with a few more expletives as we fade to black.)

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(Nathan Cross is standing in front of a Crossovers Logo. He has that stereotypical grin on his face, and unlike the last fade out, he’s dressed. A Crossover t-shirt and tear away pants adorn everyone’s favorite king of the Crossovers. His hair is still wet and falling in his face as he begins to talk.)

NC: Now that On time is posted, or as my smarks like to call it – Some Time, I am heading into my first Pay Per View extravaganza. I looked over the list, and it’s pretty amazing. Southern. Adler. Gunns. Stanley. The PRO’s. Troy. And then you have my crew – the other Nathan, some guy named Jean, the muffin man, Eddy Loves favorite Lover, the masked insane Tsunami, Rip Van Winkle Fandangled, and of course – Cameron Cruise.

Cruise, you did what I ask of all my opponents. You pulled the best out of me. I’ll be honest, I didn’t think you had it in you. I’ll be honest, you proved me wrong. I’ll be honest, we’ll be meeting again… and if you ask my Crossovers, they’ll tell you – next time, it’s for the World Title.

And then you have the other matches – Eli, Aho. Windham will lose to the guy that I tested myself against – Hornet. And NO WHERE on this card do you find Sean Stevens. That is an injustice. The Crossovers demand a recount.

They demand that he also be taken off CSWA television… and the dark matches… stop having him even open up those shows. They’ve already bought their popcorn and went to the bathroom.

So what’s going to happen at Bob’s house? I’ll do what I always do… entertain. And if anyone doesn’t entertain my Crossovers, they’re next promo will be cut by that ‘Crossing Over’ Psychic Dude.

(Cut)