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View Full Version : Troy Vs. The World



GreggG
12-14-01, 03:49 AM
(CUT TO: Troy Windham, wearing Oakley shades, a white headband that reads "GO CLIPPERS" on it, red Fred Durst visor, and a PLAYBOYS INC. basketball jersey, standing in front of a blue-screen shot of a CSWA logo.)

TROY: So it's come down to this. Chad Merrit wants to sell out arenas and create a buzz for his baby, the CSWA. He sees that there's a man on his roster who has a higher Q rating than Michael Jordan and a man who is more of a ratings grab than Osama Bin Laden. He sees a man who has done it all in this sport and he wants him to have a match against the only two people he hasn't faced... Chad Merrit wants yours truly, The Boy Troy, The King of All Media, to once again bring the CSWA to a higher lever.

Except this time, there's a twist. Lord knows how badly I've wanted to beat Mike Randalls in the ring... the so-called greatest wrestler of all time. The insane Randalls who will stop at nothing... the Wolf who always hunts his prey. Mike Randalls, like I've said before... you're the exact reason why I haven't cashed in my Lloyd's of London Insurance policy and moved to the coast of Spain. The fact that there are still people like you out there in this sport ... guys who don't care about the fans and don't care about having a goooood time... guys who would rather watch a Japanese Death Match tape instead of going out to Spanky's Go-Go Rama... makes me realize what the purpose of being Mr. CSWA is. I'm here to eliminate people such as yourself from this sport. And I'm not going to do that by physically crippling you, like you've done so many times. I'm going to do that by mentally defeating you and making you realize that your so-called Way is wrong... that no matter how many Buddhist parables you read and how many stakes you drive through knees, you will never be as good a wrestler as Troy Windham, you will never make as much money as Troy Windham and you will never be half the man that Troy Windham is. *I* am the measuring stick of greatness in this industry. Not you. And, after you've given it your all once again on CSWA Showtime but still have come up just a little bit short... you're going to realize that while you may talk about The Way... Troy Windham is The Truth. And The Truth will ALWAYS prevail. I'm your master, Wolf.

But as great a match as Troy Windham versus Mike Randalls would be... as much money as that would make, and as big a Nielson as that would draw... Merrit had to make it even bigger by placing me in the ring against my best friend, Eddy Love.

Eddy, my man... you know I got love for you, dawg. You know I respect you. And you know that I look at you not as a competitor but as a compadre. But I also can't help but have heard your comments in the past... talking like YOU'RE the reason why these arenas sell out, like YOU'RE the greatest wrestler of all time, like YOU'RE the talk of the town. I'm not going to take away your credentials, my man. You've got a resume that will get you into my office for an interview. But I'm still the boss and as you're going to find out... I'm still the one in charge.

And I just want to take this opportunity to give a little shout out to my brother Marky Mark, who I know is watching this promo. Mark, my man... I don't know why you're back and, frankly, I don't care. You're as stale as Scott Baio and you're as shaky as Michael J. Fox. You get in my face one more time, I'm sending you back to Sweetwater even more humbled than the time Mickey Benedict ruined your career. (FTB)

Steve
12-14-01, 04:03 AM
[updated:LAST EDITED ON Dec-14-01 AT 02:13 AM (EDT)]MARK WINDHAM: Oh Geez. I forgot.

You're the Windham brother that was raised by Saved By The Bell.

I'm back because you've become Jesse hooked on speed.

"I'm so excited, I'm so exxxxxxcited"

Brought us all to tears didn't it?

Good things come to those who wait. The mid-season replacement is just around the corner.

Kid, I'm up for your slot.